Stubborn as a mule
Wayfaring: So…. you’re calling me because you’re so sweaty and nauseated and short of breath that you couldn’t finish your All Star Breakfast at the Waffle House.
Patient: No the gym called you because I came here to check my blood pressure and now they want me to go to the ER and I told them I wasn’t going.
Wayfaring: Mmmhmmm… so… even though you had a heart attack and got a stent and then had an enormous blood clot in your lung all less than two weeks ago, you don’t think it’s reasonable that we send you to the hospital?
Patient: What’re they gonna do anyway? They can’t do anything! They just wanna run tests and run up bills. I don’t think I ever had a blockage. They made me get the blood clot when they were running wires into my heart. I can just come to your office and you can check me out.
Wayfaring: Let me be clear with you, sir. If you come to my office, you will be wasting your time. I will be sending you to the emergency room based on your symptoms and your vitals and your recent illness.
Patient: Ugh, you people and your tests.
Wayfaring: Do I need to remind you that I have already saved your life TWICE this year, sir? Please at least respect that and trust me when I tell you that this is not good.
Patient: *hangs up. Shows up at my office 2 hours later. Gets sent to the hospital. Gets mad. But once again DOESN’T DIE because of Wayfaring.*
Nurse: You know, one day he’s not going to come up here and he’s just gonna have the big one and die at home.
Wayfaring: And I’m gonna put “stubbornness” as his cause of death on his death certificate.