- share your favorite childhood memory
- what are some of the things that remind you of me?
- share your cute crush stories maybe?
- describe your dream date!!
- how was your day?
- what are some of your “impossible” dreams?
- who is your favorite person? why?
- describe your dream significant other?
- what do you wanna be when you grow up?
- what’s your go-to happy place?
- share your favorite songs!!
- suggest some good books, films, anime, etc
- what makes your heart go 💖💘💓💟💕
- describe your pets!!!
- what’s something good that happened to you today?
I really don't get why some people don't want malec sex I mean they're both adults in a relationship and they can do what they want, this isn't just a one night stand they're endgame but even if they weren't what is the problem?and alec maybe innocent because he is a virgin but we all saw the thirst and attraction he feels for magnus ever since their first meeting people really need to stop thinking he is some sort of pure child beacuse new flas alec is wild as hell and has sexual desires too
alright then han sung. since you say you're that smart, solve this without using any calculator. find the arc length of three x times the square root of seven minus two from x equals zero to one half.
*stares at equation while deeply thinking* well, there are two 'twos' in the equation- minus two and the denominator from the one half. the number two sounds like the letter 'u', and u is between the letters 't' and 'v' in the alphabet.
but tvs aren't really relevant anymore because everybody has computers now, so it's kind like... if you have two tvs, what is it even-
IM GOING TO KEEP POKING YOU ABOUT AUTISTIC NESTA BC THOSE HEADCANONS WERE A M A Z I N G AND IM OBSESSED WITH THIS!!!!! Can you talk about autistic Nesta in the context of nessian though please bc I would love to hear your thoughts!!
Of course I can, friend! ^_^ This will be a weird blend of like…meta and headcanons it’s just a little stream of thoughts, basically?
Okay first thing that I love especially in the context of this is the differences, socially, between Cassian and Nesta? (And also the ironies that come with this and how they were raised but I’ll get to that in a second.) I just..Love the gender role reversal for a start?
Women tend to be the ones who are expected to have more social skills and be good at performing emotional labour in relationships. Men are typically allowed more leeway and it’s expected that they won’t be as good at reading other people and are generally seen as less compassionate and what have you.
This, very obviously, gets flipped on its head when it comes to Nessian. Nesta is uncomfortable in social situations, prefers to be on her own, and when she is around people she can come off as a little…acerbic, sometimes. Like she loves them but dear god she does not have the patience to be around them all the time. Cassian on the other hand, is the picture of social intelligence. He’s described repeatedly as being deeply compassionate and it’s also made clear that he’s excellent at reading and understanding people and knowing how to respond to them.
The ironies associated with this is that revolve around how they grew up. Think about it. Cassian, who’s so deeply connected to and good with people, grew up alone as an abandoned bastard. He was trained as a soldier and rose to be an army commander, all while having this huge heart and amount of social intelligence that means he’s more naturally suited to solving problems with his head rather than his fists.
Then there’s Nesta, an autistic who probably wasn’t diagnosed as such in the human world (if they have a concept of autism in this world (let’s say they do)) But Nesta is a girl, and she’s a noble-born girl too, whose mother loved the parties and social life that being of this class afforded her. Nesta is expected to carry that on and be good at it as well and I can just imagine her struggling with it? The parties are too loud and too crowded and there are too many people and it honestly doesn’t matter how many lessons her mother gives her on social politics and etiquette; somehow she always, always manages to do something wrong. And she never understands exactly why or how it’s wrong. Just that when she tries to join in on the conversation everything goes quite. People give her that look. And her mother is standing staring on in disappointment from the corners.
Multiply this over the course of several years and then introduce a sister like Elain, who is so obviously better at this than her, who gets praise from her mother and from all of her friends while Nesta is shunted to the side and I’m not surprised she gave up and started thinking of them all as ‘sycophantic fools’ instead. Nesta got fed up trying because no matter what she did it was never quite right, and never ever good enough, so she stopped.
She stopped trying to be like them and she just started being herself instead. People still sometimes fell into awkward silences when she spoke but now she wasn’t disheartened by it, she’d expected it. She still pushed people away but she didn’t sit up late at night crying herself to sleep about it anymore. This was just the way that she was. This was just who she was. She wasn’t her mother, and she wasn’t Elain, either, even if she loved them both dearly. She was herself. And if they didn’t like that, well, she didn’t much like them, either, what did she care?
And then Cassian and Nesta meet one another and it’s like two sides of the same coin being allowed to face and see each other for the first time. Cassian comes up against someone that he can’t always read, someone who operates a little differently to how he’s used to, someone who confuses him, keeps him guessing, someone he doesn’t automatically know everything about. A challenge.
And Nesta…Nesta finds someone who actually tries. She finds someone who sees the surface her, that cold, withdrawn, acerbic air she somehow can’t help but project whenever she’s around people (and has long since stopped trying to help it - Elain accepts her for who she is, everyone else can too) but sees her too. He sees beneath to the raging heart, the torrent of fierce emotions they all accuse her of not having.
She’s heard them whispering in the village, heard them call her heartless and unfeeling and they don’t understand. None of them understand just how deeply she feels, just how strong her heart is. And she tells herself that it’s their loss, their fault they’ll never truly know, never truly benefit from all the fierce love she has to give…But it does get lonely.
Then he comes along and he sees her. He sees that fierce heart and those raging emotions and he understands. He’s so unlike her, in fact it’s probably difficult to find someone less like her than Cassian. Yet he understands her.
For all their differences in how they see and interact with the world, though, they respond to it incredibly similarly. Cassian and Nesta have…A lot of the same motives and ideals and goals, actually. They stem from very different places and very different people but they are the same.
That determination. That ability to sacrifice and destroy yourself for someone that you love. The way that Nesta would have died fighting Tamlin for Elain. The way that Cassian spreads his wings in front of Az to protect him from the king’s magic. The way that Nesta declares herself emissary to the human world because they are the forgotten, the group no-one cares about or seeks to help. But she will. The way Cassian stands before Nesta and swears to defend the humans with her, because dying to save those who cannot protect themselves is a worthy end for him. The way Nesta shields Cassian’s body with her own; as he had done for his brother all those months ago. The way Cassian sets himself up to die so that others will live.
They are such different people but their hearts are alike and in spite of everything they understand each other.
So I love that aspect of this dynamic, but I also love the fact that Cassian accepts and loves Nesta for who she is. Without expecting or wanting her to change, in a way that I don’t think anyone save Elain has ever truly done. (I’ve argued before but I’ll say it again, Elain also has a lot of social intelligence, like Cassian. She also grew up with Nesta and I think that she sees and understands her in a similar way to Cassian and this is one of the reasons that the two sisters are so close - that understanding)
Cassian’s acceptance of Nesta is really important to me because I think it’s so easy to see a character like her and expect her to change. Expect her to soften herself so that she can more easily navigate the world. Expect her to thaw herself and become warmer and friendlier and more open because this is what’s expected of someone of her gender and class. Expect her to fit the moulds that she never has fit and likely never will, but it’s expected that she’ll shatter some intrinsic part of herself to do so. And in the context of this hc it’s even more important to me that Nesta is never forced to do that, is never forced to change, and is allowed to utterly be herself…and still be loved and worthy of love and a mate and a support circle in spite of all that. Because she doesn’t conform to society’s expectations, because she can’t conform to them. And that doesn’t matter. She is not broken, she does not need to be ‘fixed’, she only needs to be accepted.
Okay, okay, last thing on this post (which got really long and out of hand, I have other autistic!Nesta/Nessian hcs on another post that someone asked for, smaller and less meta-y ones, so I’ll just post that as it is instead of forcing them in here) but one thing I really love in the context of this hc is, once they’re together, Cassian sort of…helping Nesta understand and navigate the social world around them.
So Nesta talking to someone and saying something and the conversation ends a little abruptly and she can lean into Cass and ask him if that was okay or- Did she fuck up? How did she fuck up? And Cassian can either gently explain the social rules that have escaped her all her life if need be, or he can reassure her that no, she did good, that was fine, they’re just a prick.
Or Cass can do what Feyre did for her at the dinner, and reassure her that people aren’t trying to hurt her all the time, sometimes they’re just teasing but they really do mean well. (But also Cassian having quiet words and asking people to stop that if it continues to bother her) and him like…Interpreting other people for her because jfc they’re exhausting, she has no idea what’s going on at all, she is Tired.
Cassian understanding when Nesta can’t face the idea of a party or a big social gathering, even with his help, so they just stay in that night and snuggle and be together.
Nesta using the mating bond between them to start learning Cassian’s tells. Because she can learn how to read people’s body language it’s just…like learning any other language because it’s not intrinsic or instinctive. So she can feel through the bond what he’s feeling and thinking, and start to learn how he looks when he’s angry or agitated or upset. Even if Cass tries to hide them from her, then…She knows.
Cassian just…Helping Nesta to navigate the tangled minefield that is social interaction and working with her and supporting her instead of just sighing at her. Understanding that there are some things she genuinely can’t do because she processes the world differently to him and her brain is just wired differently.
Cassian being completely and utterly fascinated by this and wanting to learn all about it and exactly how it’s different and exactly what he should do to help and Nesta being…Shocked. Because people either turn their noses up at her and assume she’s trying to be rude or difficult, or they just try and beat the same lessons into her over and over again but Cass just…Okay but how do we make things work for you and how can I change a little to better accommodate you for a change and Nesta just…Being really, really touched that he’d do this for her.
Nesta growing more confident in herself and far, far less insecure around other people. She opens up a little more because she can be herself and be accepted and wanted for that. She doesn’t have to choose any more between being who she is, and keeping people around her. She can have both. Cassian helping her and supporting her into reaching that conclusion and refusing to allow her to expect any less from people just because of the way that she is. Cassian never, ever expecting Nesta to change herself this way because then, well, she really wouldn’t be Nesta. This is a part of who she is and he helps encourage her and others to accept that about her.
so i just went through the lams tag of your blog and wanted to tell you how much i love your art <3 you're so precious and need to be protected at all costs 💕 (also since your requests are open again - i may or may not have lowkey squealed - maybe lams with flower crowns? :D)
Thank you so much! You’re way too kind to me! And of course- have some nerds!
tldr; try to practice it multiple times a day. just randomly call ur dog and then have a party with preferred reward (toys, treats, praise, squeaky voice etc)
when they resting in another room
when they cant see you
when they clearly distracted by a smell in ur house
turn it into hide and seek
expand it to ur front yard or some fenced yard with minimal distractions or long line + harness
start taking it to other places. UR NOT DRILLING THIS OK, just let them walk along doing their thing THEN suddenly call…then 5 more minutes doing their thing, THEN SUDDENLY CALL
slowly build it up to them being distracted by things, but start when they naturally looking ur way
use happy excited voice!! always! do not bother with serious HERE voice for this, this is ur excited party recall and u want it to reach into the very fibre of their being and have them running to u before they even finish hearing it. ur tone, ur enthusiasm, they matter. u will look like an idiot but ohmygod when u recall ur reactive dog from a strange dog that approached her it is WORTH IT
try to touch their collar. just treat and collar, treat and collar, so touching collar = good thing, not the fun is ending. u can do this exercise separately.
separate to all ur COMMAND practice, randomly
reward them checking in on you. just looking at u. could be treats, a
game, praise, going over to sniff something - whatever it is u think ur
dog would like that moment. u want them to look at u more often, just
good skill to have.
Remember, this is built on repetition, practice and reinforcement! and nothing gonna be 100%, keep an eye on ur environment and try to anticipate “bad” distractions - and call your dog BEFORE they notice the distraction
here’s the shitty bit.
do this couple of times every day for a couple of months. ur dog will get better and faster. dont give them opportunities to run off until a couple of months in, breath, go somewhere safe and not too distracting and only recall when u think the odds are good or preventive measure (ie a potential distraction u noticed first). reward…then let them go back to doing the thing they were doing.
after that couple of months, you can dial back…and u won’t lose points for skipping a day here and there.
don’t expect 100%. strive for it, aim for 99% and acknowledge that 1% of the time it will be out of ur hands. keep working at 99%. vary it up, put ur own twist on it as u work out what works best with ur dog. do touch ups as needed (the grounded incident last year lmao)
e.g here is me, playing some game with thistle. i try to do this game once a week…at dog school…with all the other dogs around…because this is an environment i really want to reinforce turning on the dime to me. this game doubles as a reward, cause she gets to chase and bite the treats.
that’s my high prey drive low impulse control didnt know shit when i got her at 1 year old rescue. 2.5 years later with lots of work, not so bad, hey? we’ve got some crittering issues, sure, and i still need to manage carefully…but i take her offlead to bushes, reserves and even some less populated city parks. with all that training and reinforcement, comes freedom and fun!
and she still blew me off a bit later for what turned out to be week old abandoned steak ;) win most lose some
and here is us playing actual hide and seek. ive started doing it with thyme, on easy level (just standing in a different room/behind objects) to build reinforcement in the desire to find me when he cannot see me!
tldr tldr i believe in you anon! and in pointy-pup! some dogs need more work but keep at it!
I went to kxk thread in OH i wanted 2 c their reaction & the entire thing is filled with edits & I just don't understand these ppl. They have this passion for a ship that has like 3 legit moments together 2 of them being photoshoots. Then I realized SM sold it well. "They were friends for 10 yrs" etc like a high school romance. But even then I cannot ship a couple this hard with 3 moments I need more, i get kd shippers passion for kd I really don't get kxk shippers passion over edits.
Honestly? I don’t get it either. Why are people even talking about KxK or KD? KRYSOO IS THE RELATIONSHIP THAT’S REAL.
I’m 100% serious right now just like this real selfie of them
I’m so done with y’all.
How can you ignore them?
What do you mean it’s not Ksoo? Y’all blind
Just look at her smile. That’s how she smiles at her bf Ksoo.
It’s LOVE. How can you ship them with other people? Stop fetishizing them!
And the two of them going on date. Look how good they look together!
They are just perfect together.
Do you see those genuine smiles?
Wow… just wow. #relationshipgoals
What do you mean that doesn’t proof anything?! I just showed you photos of them together! Well, alright. Here’s some more!
Krys making sure her bf is not flirting with other girls.
And this. THIS. I bet Krys learned that from Ksoo.