Alien Names

Disclaimer: Granted, I can’t say I’ve read and watched or played every single book movie and game involving aliens, and I can name multiple examples where this isn’t the case, but I’m not here to make a serious fuss, I just wanted to point something out and the it devolved into a bit of fun. Don’t read to far into this.

It used to confuse me when alien races were named based on their planets. Our race is typically called human, not Earthlings, so wouldn’t it make sense for alien races to have names for themselves? I spent a bit too much time thinking about, and I tried to come up with a few reasons as to why aliens would share names with their home planets. (beyond writers taking shortcuts)

And yes, I know chances are that everyone’s relying on translation technology and that could account for the name thing, but I already wrote all of this so here you go.

A few cases where referring to a race by their planet name sort of makes sense:

One: the entire species is united under a single government empire, and that either the empire is named after the planet, or the planet was renamed for the empire. That race may still have their own species name, but they also go by their nations designation. (such as how humans may refer to themselves by their home nation or even region, so you can have a human who is also an American and also a Texan. Humans would be among those confusing species that have multiple names)

Two: almost the opposite of option one, but this case would actually fit humanity at the moment. There is no planetwide government, and individual nations speak a wide range of different languages. Each language has a different word for their kind, and none of those words sound alike. None of the nations can agree on which language to pick their name from. Other races eventually give up and just call them by their homeworld name, informing them that if they ever agree on a single name they’ll change it to that.

Three: an alien race has a name in their own language, but that name is both completely impossible to pronounce for anyone other than that species (either due to unique vocalization structures, or perhaps they don’t vocalize at all. They could be communicating via light or scents or even gestures) and if that name has no sort of translation or equivalent meaning in other languages. Perhaps one species has an unpronounceable name, but that name translates to something along the lines of Waterkeeper. it sounds a bit ridiculous, but it’s the closest thing we could get to their actual name, so we call them by that title out of respect. But if the name has no translation and can’t be spoken, they would be named for their homeworld.

Four: this one race is well known for being incredibly easygoing and relaxed. A bit too relaxed, it seems, since they haven’t really bothered with a name for themselves other than “people.” If their word for people can be pronounced, then that word in their language can be their name. They might be referred to as the [Planet Name] People just for clarification, and that of course could be shortened just to a variation of the Planet Name. They don’t mind either way.

Five: a species found on a recently discovered planet is displaying signs of sapience. Maybe this race is only just starting to discover stone tools, or maybe it’s already in the earliest stages of developing civilization, but at the moment (as with option two) it has neither a globally used language nor a single central government (it doesn’t really have any kind of government at all yet). At this point that species would be referred to by the Planet Name. Their development would be observed and documented under that name. When the time comes that this species has a single name for itself, or if they’ve come up with a single name for their homeworld, then all the data gathered on that race would be updated to match. (scientists of various races are somewhat sad to say goodbye to the old names, but also proud that the new species is now capable of naming itself)

(any other ideas? feel free to take this idea and run with it!)

Grimoire/Book of Shadows Protection Spell

Here’s how I did my spell in case any other new witches would wanna try it!

I started by putting this sigil (by user @ceramyn) inside the front cover of my book thinking that then if someone touches the front cover they would immediately feel a negative response and put my book back down. 

Then, I used a small stool as my altar since i don’t have an actual altar set up, or much of anything yet really, and set it up like this:

5 candles:

  •  3 white tea lights placed at south, east, and west; 
  • 1 white taper candle placed at north surrounded by little green glass stones i found around my house (my sign/element corresponds to earth so i put some emphasis on that direction–north=earth) 
  • a red candle to light the others during the spell 

I put my book in the center of all of these candles and lit them one by one according to their order in the spell, then held the red candle throughout the duration of the spell.

spell i used 

By the north, bless this book with the power of the Earth
By the south, bless this book with the power of fire
By the east, bless this book with the power of air
By the west, bless this book with the power of water

Keep this book secret from wondering eyes
and safe from the prying look,
fill it with power, ancient and wise
and let me learn and grow from this book

so I intend it, so mote it be

When I said the last phrase i placed my hand on my grimoire and repeated it until i felt i had put enough intent/power into it. At the end i let one drop of the red candle’s wax fall in the center circle of that sigil i put on the inside cover.

feel free to play around with this and adjust it to your own needs this is just what worked/felt right for me :)

A Quick Spell to Dispel Anger

for  Day 4 of Spirit Connect’s Challenge, Steve and I wrote this together.

  1. go into the nearest bathroom. close and lock the door
  2. look at your reflection, maintain eye contact
  3. rub your hands together, getting them really warm, and focusing on what makes you angry
  4. visualize a bright, angry, red fire on your hands
  5. turn on the tap and rinse your hands under cold water
  6. keep washing until all the fire has been put out, or until it feels right

Nine ways of destroying your spoons

Step 0: Accept this title is already a lie

1. Wash your hair
Bottle lifted
Hands flexed to squeeze–
just right, not too much
not too little–
Hand cupped
Arms lifted to head
Then pressure, downwards
Moving in circles
Pounded by water
Keep going until rinsed
Repeat? No.

2. Vacuum the floor
Hips and back bent
Unwind cord
Still bent
Plug in cord.
Jostle handle downwards
Push button
SHOVE with the thigh
SHOVE with the arm
SHOVE with the hip
PULL with the hamstring
STRETCHing backwards
GRASPing the handle
THROWing all the weight.
Repeat? Apparently a lot.

3. Make your dinner
Handle clutched
Hips shifted to open
Stooped down slightly
then hand thrust forward
Weight shifting
shredding deltoids
then triceps
balance maintained
by the deathgrip on the door
Plastic container tossed
somewhere safe, countertop
Oh god, there’s still the heating
and eating, too?

4. Write email
Hard chair under butt
hard plastic wrists
Slight movements left right
up down, tap–NOT SLIDE–
on the mouse pad
Fingers creaking
stuck, unmoving
delete, backspace, undo
the right ring and left pinkie
have pushed so hard
it’s aalllll out of control
password accepted
Words now would be good.
In order would be better.

5. Grade some papers
See above, but with more
hands jerked
tips caught suspended
one hand ahead of the other
of course on a keyboard
A pencil? Do I look like
an athlete?

6. Drive to the pharmacy
Door opened
Paused before the space
hip yanked up
to fit foot in the well
and THUNK, drop all at once
into the seat.
Arms grip left leg to move it inside
Ignore the popping noise
Knuckles bent around key
wrist snaps to turn–
not too long, not too short
not like I have much control over that–
let go, and left fingers wrap
around the wheel
Right leg clenches up
held on the brake
–not too much, not too little–
burning already before
right arm twists into gear
Right leg clenched
prepared to slide over
ankle flexion burning.
And we’re out of the parking space.
Only a mile and a half to go!

7. Write some poems
notepad opened
hands tense over keyboard
oh screw it

hey psa for period-havers this summer

i had some of this happen to me and it is horrible and painful so re: heat rash and other summer-related period woes

  • if you have sensitive skin try to use always infinity pads, “regular” pads chafe the skin and can cause heat rash
  • if you don’t use pads, tampons can become literally sweaty, change them more often to avoid harm to your vagina
  • apply deodorant to your sweat areas. it’s not just for underams. baby powder should be without talcum and don’t apply it to your vulva
  • change your underwear at least twice a day. i know it sucks to change them that much but if they’re damp, you can seriously hurt your skin and sweat ducts with the moisture
  • if you are masculine-presenting or just wanna, dfab boxers are airy and provide a place to put a pad - try to look on google for options
  • don’t sleep with pyjama bottoms on if you can help it
  • drink a lot of water
  • keep your vulva dry, pat it with a towel, as well as your inner thighs and hips
  • if you get what looks to be a rash, use aloe after-sun or a lotion with aloe
  • if you have a red bump on your vulva it’s a blocked sweat duct, don’t rub it or touch it beyond putting aloe on it
  • try to wear looser underwear, if it’s tight it can chafe and cause skin damage and blood restriction, causing more cramps
  • be cautious about hair removal as you can be more susceptible to complications from hair removal than other times of the year 
  • you can have allergic reactions to certain period products as your skin becomes more sensitive, try to find hypoallergenic options
  • if your skin starts to crack, bleed, etc go to the hospital it’s out of your hands and you NEED to get medical help

Now here´s a very important message from Edward James Olmos and Waterkeeper !

Image: Tig Notaro performing in Hollywood in April. (Rich Polk/Getty Images for Waterkeeper Alliance)

In 2012, Tig Notaro walked onto the stage at LA’s Largo Theater and said, “Good evening hello, I have cancer, how are you? Hi, how are you? Is everybody having a good time? I have cancer. How are you?”

Notaro was in the middle of one of the worst years of her life, dealing with serious illness, a breakup and the death of her mother.

 “Of course I was scared,” she tells NPR’s Kelly McEvers, “but it really did reach a breaking point. … I don’t prepare too much before my shows. Usually before, when I’m showering, is really when I’m thinking things through, and that’s when I came up with that line … I thought it was the funniest line.”

Notaro is now in remission. She’s also recently married and the author of a new memoir, I’m Just A Person.

Tig Notaro On Her Terrible Year In ‘I’m Just A Person’