watches star trek

skype sentence starters part 2
  • “i don’t know her”
  • “all i wanted to do was watch star trek”
  • “i swear bob saget killed papouli”
  • “share full house conspiracies with me”
  • “___ is in hell.”
  • “i spent 24 hours awake and ended it with bee movie”
  • “i didn’t mean to do that but now that it’s happened i’m gonna play it off like i meant to the whole time.”
  • “word to the wise: don’t call amazon at 3:30 am”
  • “you added a voice actor on facebook so i don’t wanna hear it”
  • “don’t ever look up ‘christian sonic fanart’ because it’s real”
  • “oh no, anime.”
  • “that’s not a mom that’s a 12 year old”
  • ”is there anything sadder than watching the clone pikachu fight real pikachu?”
  • “do you think Namor gets the suds like spongebob?”
  • “Lifetime biopics vs the original is like when you actually get it in the mail vs when you order it online.”
  • “she says Gene Simmons is her favorite Naruto character.”
  • “come on, take one for the meme!”
  • “i hope you never say that again for the rest of your life.”
  • “the pizza guy dropped my pizza and I’m so fuckin distraught”
  • “you named this file gaymemes”
  • “this is the gay memes initiative”
  • “i love that satanic lesbian”
  • “i made a character based on you. his name is edgelord jones”
  • “this is a callout and i’m not standing for it”
  • “don’t ask about his pet eel”
  • “i’m throwing bread at everyone i see”
  • “there’s a bottle of febreze in my room and no one knows where it came from so how did it get here?”
  • “my febreze is haunted.”
  • “we have a microwave now and i’m genuinely so happy. i’ll heat up my wallet i don’t care. i’ll heat up everything.”
my favorite thing
  • person watching Star Trek for the first time: It can't be that gay
  • same person ten minutes later: holy shit
3

We are the Mirrorverse

Imagine an entire Star Trek show about a group of people who aren’t members of the bridge crew or one of the higher ups, and each week it’s them trying to do their job while crazy shit happens that they don’t really understand, like:

  • They get an announcement from their superior officers that goes “You may notice a child walking around the ship in a captain’s uniform. That is in fact the captain and is to be treated the same as always. We’re quickly working on a solution.”
  • A transporter mishaps causes the chief engineer to turn into a vulcan. They try not to stare at the ears, and move on.
  • Shots of them reacting to superior officers running through the background in the midsts of a red alert that they don’t know what it’s in response to.
  • “Did you hear the away team landed on planet that had five years pass before they got them back?” “Man, I’m glad I got skipped over for that assignment.”
  • Trying to figure out if the rumor that their commander got kidnapped by an alien race that considers them their god is true or just something made up by a bridge crewman to mess with them.
  • Popping in and out of existence and taking bets on which All Powerful race it is that’s doing it and why.
  • anytime Weird Shit happens on the ship it’s never explained. why are there chickens in the Jeffrey Tubes? why does the captain have a double? why did the chief medical examiner briefly turn homicidal? they don’t know and neither do you.
  • Each episode ends with them pouring one out for the crewmembers who died that week.