i think one thing the studyblr community doesn’t talk about enough is how hard it is to do any “self-care” actions while living with strict/abusive parents/guardians.
like when i was in high school, if i was “caught” watching TV or sitting outside in the sun reading a non-school-required book or even talking on the phone with friends, i’d get yelled and lectured at for “wasting” time and i should get back to studying or practicing violin, or if those were done then “great, why don’t you go do the laundry or cook dinner”.
i’m not saying i didn’t want to help around the house and whatnot, but i just… wanted to rest. to recuperate. to take a few minutes to myself to stay healthy. and it was so difficult to do that when my mom thought any second i was not studying or practicing violin was a second wasted and it was going to land me unemployed for life (literally her thoughts). and if i told her anything like “hey i don’t think i have the time for this” she’d just go “well so-and-so is taking these classes and doing these extracurriculars and blah blah blah so why can’t you why are you such a failure” etc etc. and wow.. that hurt.
so even if i did find a chance to rest and relax, i always had that fear and anxiety in the back of my mind that my mom would walk in at any second and start yelling at me.
but i did find times to truly 100% unwind, such as when she was engaged in a long phone call, or had left the house. so it wasn’t all too hopeless…
but yeah, for those of you out there who can relate and understand the reality of “self-care” isn’t always easy to obtain, i just want to let you know that you’re not alone. i understand telling you this doesn’t do anything to alleviate your situation, but i get you, and what you’re going through is awful, but real, and therefore your feelings are valid.
and i will also say that it gets better. if you have the opportunity to move out after employment or when you go to college, your life will become more and more your own. so hang in there <3
Home is the best habitat for these two signs. Taurus is earthy and fixed, like a wooden floor or furniture, while Cancer is watery and cardinal, like the set of doilies bought to go well with the same light pink of the ceramic cups they use for hot chocolate milk. Cancer has a moody disposition, a strong need to give and receive affection, and Taurus loves just that: in every relationship between these two signs, Taurus reliability and loyalty emerge like the main stabilizing force, and set the best environment ever for both signs to live in.
As friends, the one that has the more adventurous Rising or Venus sign gets to start socializing with the other; if they’re both shy types, Cancer will probably take the lead. They’re both tender and slow-paced, two lovers of the cozy feeling of an afternoon spent eating chocolate, covered in several layers of blankets, possibly near a fireplace, watching TV while outside it’s raining. They’re the calm kind of people that only hangs out with responsible, good-humored and amiable friends, someone able of appreciating not only Taurus’ tasty sarcasm but also Cancer’s clingy affection and enthusiasm. They are not that fancy: every place where there’s a quiet atmosphere, relaxing music and good food is their place.
As lovers, Taurus will take a certain amount of time before being convinced that the relationship might work, but once that happens, it could last for years or forever. Both Cancer and Taurus express their love in materialistic ways: cooking, cuddling, buying presents, all the by-the-book classic style romance, and a lot of sex. Given their sedentary and physical nature, they wouldn’t be doing anything but that for a great percentage of their time; their lifetime would end up being equally distributed among workplace, kitchen and bedroom. Some Cancers, especially the ones that have an air dominance in their natal chart, would need to cut out a bit of time just for themselves every once in a while, but that wouldn’t be a problem: a sitting on a comfortable sofa, watching TV Taurus is a soon-asleep Taurus, and Cancer would have all the space he requires. Their lives are usually so full of one another’s presence that even friends would hardly fit in their schedule, although surely they would always be welcome to come dining in their living room.
As enemies, spoilt, evil Cancers could get perfidious and nagging, and that would be a real problem for any Taurus: sure, they are incredible furies when they get angry, but that takes an incommensurable amount of offense to be received, possibly with a quality of directness, before they start flipping tables. The usual Taurus would just opt for an ignoring policy and try not to hear or give a damn about what an enemy Cancer would say or do, but it would still make their level of stress and nervousness rise and make them malcontented. They would end up being bullied and do nothing about it; worst scenario, if their endurance is reinforced by an earthy chart, and if Cancer is part of the family or their partner, they could just go on putting up with them forever. They would need some fiery/airy placement and maybe some external help to get free from the situation.
It was the sound of muffled speaking that ultimately drew you from slumber. You were lying on your stomach, cheek pressed against the pillow, and with the sun shining directly onto your face it was a wonder why you didn’t wake up earlier. You wrinkled your nose, willing your eyes not to close again, and let out a grumble as you stretched your toes. A hand landed gently atop your head, smoothing the knots that had accumulated through the night. His touch brought tingles of pleasure through your skin and you swivelled onto your back to flash him a groggy smile.
Sebastian was sitting up against the headboard, a bowl of cereal in his lap as he watched reruns of Friends on the TV opposite your bed. He leaned down to smack a loud kiss to your cheek. “Good morning,” he said, smiling. You shuffled onto your elbows to peer into his bowl, making a face when all that was there were frosted cornflakes. You didn’t have anything against them but you had been hoping for something a little more exotic.
“It’s so cold,” you complained, dragging the blanket up to your chin. It was the only thing stopping you from heading into the kitchen to make some toast. You pressed closer to his side and attempted to tangle your legs between his.
“Yikes!” Sebastian yelped, snatching his legs away. “Your feet are freezing!”
You pouted. “I know. Warm them up for me.”
“Go put on some socks,” he argued.
“Sebastian,” you whined.
The two of you stared at each other, Friends playing in the background, until he gave up with a sigh and set down his breakfast onto the bedside table before getting up. “Lazy,” he muttered, trudging to the tallboy and grabbing a pair of socks from the last drawer. You had wanted him to man up and let you rest your feet under his butt, which would no doubt be hot as hell, but at least now you didn’t have to get out of bed.
He whipped the covers off of you and you cursed at him, shrivelling into yourself to keep warm. He laughed and tugged your legs right out from under you, pulling the socks onto your feet and hugging them to his chest for a moment before letting you curl back into a ball.
He slipped in beside you, back once again to the headboard, and lifted an arm, eyes casually trained on the TV. “Come here,” he murmured, and you felt a spike in your heart rate as you shuffled under his wing, reaching out to hug his waist. Even after a year of dating, he still had the ability to bring out the school girl in you.
You plopped your legs over his and grabbed your phone off the pillow. It wasn’t enough to just watch TV. The sky outside was glowing silver now that the sun had retreated behind the winter clouds. Cars bustled down your street, probably towards the grocery store or farmer’s market. You squeezed Sebastian like a soft toy and thought that marrying him wouldn’t be so bad if each Sunday was like this.
insists that they are an awesome dancer even though they’re terrible: outsider, corvo is constantly reminding him that floating is cheating when dancing, but when he doesnt float he just trips over his own two feet like a nerd.
likes to watch reality tv: outsider. he loves to watch people make fools of themselves.
refuses to wear pants when they’re home alone: corvo. mostly bcus he cant find them half the time.
is the jealous / protective one: they both kind of are under the right circumstances, and outsider likes to make corvo purposely jealousy bcus the rough sex it brings it a+
goes all out on the holidays: corvo does but he does it for emily.
cries over books: corvo sniffles.
is terrible with kids: outsider lbr
drinks too much caffeine: corvo. he doesnt know what moderation is.
could sleep for twenty-four hours straight: corvo
never wears matching socks: cORVO
punches a tree when they’re angry: corvo
gets scared by the toaster: they both do. sometimes outsider poofs away bcus hes startled and corvo has broken three toasters so far bcus he reacted on impulse
A/N: My second New Year’s request, but this one comes from @shenko/ @greatgube! In this one Spencer and the reader have been best friends forever, work together and are madly in love with each other, but neither has the guts to say it. At a party, they both get stuck under the mistletoe and finally kiss, admitting their feelings for one another. @coveofmemories
You’d literally grown up with Spencer. As a kid, you didn’t know anything but the little boy across the street who was only two months older than you. At the age of four, a ball of yours had wandered into the street and Spencer had come to return it to you. Ever since then, you’d been the best of friends, going to high school and college at around the same time, and obtaining the same job at the FBI’s Behavioral Analysis Unit. There was never a day you didn’t speak to each other, and honestly, you couldn’t remember the last time you hadn’t seen him at least once during a day.
He was your best friend. Your everything. The only problem was that over the past few years you had been finding yourself falling madly in love with him, and given how close your were, you didn’t want to say anything and possibly make it weird. You couldn’t imagine what you would do if you lost him because he felt weird around you; you might not be able to take it.
Spencer had been unlucky in many ways, but when it came to Y/N, he considered himself exceedingly lucky. She was his confidant - the one he could be himself around - the one he could tell anything too. At least…almost anything. The one thing he didn’t want to admit was that he was in love with her. He had been for years, but she was his best friend. If she didn’t like him in that way, then he didn’t want the nature of their relationship to change. It was too risky.
“You have to tell her,” Derek blurted out, obviously intending to have kept that thought in his head. Spencer had been looking your way without realizing it.
He wasn’t about to hide it from Derek; it was probably pretty apparent. “I can’t,” he admitted. “If she doesn’t feel the same way, I can’t risk losing her.”
Derek understood, but he sighed. “But if you don’t at least ask, you’ll never know what could have been. Won’t that drive you nuts?”
Spencer just shook his head, waving the feeling off. It probably would drive him crazy, but it was still too risky.
“So,” Hotch said, talking to Dave in his office, “New Year’s at your house this year, right?”
“Absolutely,” he replied. “I love hosting. Everyone’s coming right?”
Hotch looked out his window toward the rest of the team. “Yea. I was thinking…” he started, feeling unusually sneaky, “You notice that Spencer and Y/N are made for each other and completely in love with each other, right? Or is that just me?”
“Who doesn’t know?” Rossi laughed. It was pretty obvious to everyone that the two childhood friends and geniuses were meant to be together. “I’d imagine their close friendship is what keeps both from telling the other, but it really is a shame.”
“Well,” Hotch said, “That’s what I was thinking. Do you still have your house decorated for Christmas?”
Rossi shook his head, though definitely confused; he wasn’t sure where Hotch was going with this. Hotch started to clarify for him. “Well, what if we hang an extra bit of mistletoe around your house, tell everyone but them where it is and make sure that we call them out on it every time they walk under it.”
Rossi smiled. “Hotch, that’s so sneaky. It’s so unlike you.”
“I know,” Hotch laughed, “but they’re meant for each other and I’d hate to see such potential go to waste.”
They each took their coffee mugs and clinked them together. “I can toast to that,” Rossi said.
The next day, New Year’s Eve was upon them, and everyone was in on the mistletoe idea.
After everyone arrived, Rossi ushered the team into his dining room, where he had a meal catered. Everything looked delicious. Glasses of wine were poured, delicious food was eaten and great conversations were had. After the meal ended, everyone stood up from the table and cleaned up, while Spencer and Y/N continued their conversation.
“Hey, you two,” JJ said, pointing upward toward the ceiling. You and Spencer looked up at the same time to see a small piece of mistletoe there. Great. You had to kiss him without letting him know that you were in love with him. Normally, you’d just brush it off and not do anything, but Garcia was standing nearby and coaxing you; she’d never give up.
On your tiptoes, you reached up to Spencer’s face to give him a quick peck, subsequently turning around and blushing at how much you enjoyed the feel of his lips. Hopefully, it wouldn’t happen again; you weren’t sure how many times you could kiss him without losing it.
Another few hours passed and more wine was consumed. Even hours later, you were still thinking about the velvety softness of Spencer’s lips. You had to get a grip on yourself; you couldn’t allow yourself to fall any more than you already had. Apparently though, the new year had different plans.
“Time to kiss again,” Garcia said, pointing toward another piece of mistletoe, this one in Rossi’s living room. Spencer looked mortified. You were going to kill Rossi for this. With everyone looking on smiling, Spencer gave you the kiss this time, lingering slightly longer than before; you could’ve sworn there was even a hint of tongue, but that was probably just your brain feeling what it wanted.
As you pulled away this time, your face flushed with embarrassment again, as did Spencer’s. Immediately, you turned away from each other, beginning conversations with whoever happened to be behind them. Thankfully, there was only another three hours until the ball dropped. Hopefully you could make it through that time without finding yourself under another piece of mistletoe.
As the time neared 12, you were grateful that Spencer and yourself hadn’t run into another piece of mistletoe. You were leaning into him at this point, which wasn’t out of the normal for the two of you. Everyone else was either on the couch, watching the television or outside on this unseasonably warm New Year’s night. You felt a gentle touch at your side. “Y/N,” Spencer said, “Do you…have you hated kissing me tonight?”
That took you off guard. “What would make you think that?” It was the complete opposite. You liked it too much for your own good.
“It’s just…both times you seemed to pull away quickly and I…I liked it,” he admitted. “I’ve wanted to kiss you for a long time.”
Your eyes widen at his admission. “Really? Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I didn’t want to risk our friendship if you didn’t feel the same way, but I’m losing my mind and figured if you didn’t feel that way then at least I would know,” he said, swallowing hard.
“Spence,” you whispered. “I’ve been in love with you for years.”
Both of you swung your heads around when you heard a familiar voice. “Finally!“ Hotch said, with Rossi laughing behind him.
“You knew?” you both said simultaneously.
“We all knew,” he replied. Everyone else came out of the shadows shaking their heads. “And I’m the one that suggested the mistletoe, not Rossi.”
“Dammit, Hotch,” you said, punching him in the arm. “I’m going to kill you.” He shielded himself as you pelted him over and over again before taking your place back at Spencer’s side. “Oh, and guys?” he said, pointing up. “Kiss.”
You sat in the main room of the Avengers facility watching TV. The sky outside had just started to darken, turning from a glorious blue to warm oranges and reds. You honestly weren’t paying much attention to the current station, but rather caught up in your thoughts. You reflected on your conversation with your old friends from the other night. Somehow, you and your friends managed to discuss the topic virginity as well as when everyone lost theirs.
You openly admitted, with full trust in your girls, that you wanted to wait until you were married. You had always felt this way, even when introduced to the option of having premarital sex. You didn’t judge your friends or others for doing so, or any of their choices, honestly. You respected every choice they’ve made. Yet, even so, your friends judged you. They didn’t understand it.
“So that’s why you’ve never stayed with any guy you’ve dated!” they’d say. Or, “No wonder you’re so reluctant to open up when we go to clubs or parties!”
You were hurt. How could your own friends judge you? Especially when you respect them and their actions! Your deep thoughts were interrupted by Tony, who walked in front of the television.
“Yoo-hoo! Wake up, Y/N!” Tony spoke, waving his right hand in front of you. You blinked a few times and looked up at him. He had a few smudges from machine grease on his face and his hair was flat. He held a multi-tool in his left hand. You chuckled in response to his disgruntled state.
“You alright?” he asked. You must have looked upset, considering that Tony usually doesn’t express his concern for others.
“I’m fine. Just thinking,” you gulped down a big breath. You didn’t realize how upset the other night made you until you began to have a stomach ache.
Tony nodded, “Alright. You know where I am if you need me.” You must have looked really upset for Tony to offer his company.
As Tony began to walk off, Steve and Natasha came in. It was obvious that their mission caused quite a commotion. Even after visiting the infirmary, the pair looked quite torn up. Natasha had a few gashes on her cheeks, as well as bruises on her arms. Her red hair was askew over her forehead.
Steve was in much worse shape. He had a few stitches, one over his left eyebrow, another across the left corner of his mouth, and one on his upper right cheekbone. Dressed in a his worn-out Brooklyn tee, his new bruises and wounds were highly visible across his arms.
You caught yourself thinking of how you wish it was you in the infirmary, patching up his wounds and treating his bruises. You wanted to kiss each sore better. This wasn’t the first time you thought such thoughts about Steve, but you didn’t really expect them to arise now. You shook the thought of it off when Steve spoke.
“Hey, Y/N. What’s up?” he asked quietly. You could see his slight struggle to speak with the stitches. Yet, this did not change your reaction to his deep, soothing voice. Your stomach ache turned into butterflies, riling you up.
“Just watching TV. How’d your mission go?” It took all that you had in you to speak such a simple phrase. You felt your fingers begin to shake slightly, and Natasha let out a small laugh. You shot her a look.
“What? The mission went fine. Except for when the old guy over here lost his shield,” she motioned to Steve with her thumb. You knew what she was saying was probably true, but you knew she noticed your reaction to Steve’s voice and that that was the reason for her laughter. Although, you still laughed at this. Steve began to defend himself.
“You know, if you hadn’t hid it in the first place, I would have never lost it,” he spoke calmly, yet somewhat irritated.
“We were suppose to be undercover, and one can’t necessarily do so while carrying a giant, red, white, and blue shield,” Natasha and Steve continued to bicker as to who’s fault it was that the infamous shield was misplaced.
You lost track of the conversation and drifted into thought again. You observed Steve’s body language as he spoke. His shoulders would tense, then relax again, then tense yet again. His chest rose with each breath prior to speaking, and would fall as he spoke.
You then focused on his facial features. His eyebrows contained most of his expression, especially when confused. They would furrow together slightly, but not too much, as his eyes would widen. He looked like a young puppy when he made such a face. Or when he was angry, he would purse his lips together and rub his forehead. You focused the most on his crystal blue eyes, which would shift between grey and green tones as he moved under the room’s florescent lighting.
In this moment, you realized your love for Steve. You began to ponder if he was the one you’ve spent all your life waiting for. Was he the one who would take you? Was he going to be the one who would hold you when upset, and kiss you when happy? Was he going to be the one to take care of you when sick? Yet again, you were forced to come back to reality when Steve started shaking you by your shoulders.
“What? What? Huh?” you asked, turning to Steve as he sat to your left. Steve sighed of relief.
“You completely zoned out. You worried me there for a second,” Natasha began to laugh again as he spoke. Although Steve had stopped shaking you, you realized that his large hands still gripped your shoulders with immense strength.
“Um, Steve, do you mind, letting go of me?” Steve quickly realized what he was doing and let go. He apologized.
“No worries, Cap,” You chuckled at his embarrassment. You took note that Natasha realized the chemistry between you and Steve. Usually, Natasha doesn’t poke fun at such things, but she knew you needed to get out of your comfort zone.
“Y/N and Steve sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G,” you threw the nearest pillow at Natasha and got up. Steve was only momentarily confused until he realized what Natasha was doing. His cheeks flushed as yours did, and he looked at you. You looked away, then walked to your room.
*2 Years Later*
The air was humid, yet crisp and was filled with the sweet scent of tulips, your favorite flowers. You could hear the many people––friends, family––laughing and shouting with enjoyment and celebration. People were all smiling. Your mother’s eyes flooded with tears of joy, and so did your father’s. Your father never cries. Your own eyes were almost on the verge of tears as well. You stared at your reflection in the eyes of the man standing in front of you. Crystal blue, with tones of grey and green like the ocean. Tears appeared in the corner of his eyes, threatening to spill over.
“You’re so beautiful,” he barely whispered. He kissed you, causing another eruption of joy from the many people watching.
“I now announce you husband and wife,” the minister proclaimed. You smiled through the passionate kiss and started giggling. Steve wouldn’t let go of you. His hands gently cupped your face, as your forearms rested atop his shoulders. You both let go, staring at each other with idiotic smiles that only those in love can make.
*A few hours and one plane ride to Hawaii later*
You and Steve and somewhat settled into your hotel suite, a gift from Tony and Pepper. You and Steve didn’t feel like doing anything but laying there on the bed and its cloud-like spread in peaceful silence. With every passing second, you seemed to sink into the duvet. Yet, no matter how calming the beautiful room was, your heart pounded with immense speed. Your stomach filled with butterflies, which occasionally would bounce against the walls of your stomach and fall, but then flutter back up and repeat. You could feel the blood rush through your veins. You struggled to breathe. You were in utter shock that you just got married. You married the one. You were beyond belief that Steve lay to your left, possibly undergoing the same reactions.
Suddenly, you felt Steve move next to you. You felt his lips gently against your shoulder, then again, and again. He made his way across your left collar bone, then up your neck. He now hovered over you, staring into your eyes. He smiled and went back, kissing against your jaw, ear, practically every facial feature until he reached your lips. It was as if Steve knew you were experiencing nerves, and knew just how to calm you down.
As he began to bring his lips to yours, he spoke barely a whisper, “I love you.” His lips met yours before you could reply, and you melted under his touch. As you two kissed, he stroked your face, then pushed a few stray strands of hair behind your ear. That same hand trailed down your shoulder, then down your side. Steve rested his hand on your hip, gently though, so he wouldn’t hurt you. Here he paused, and looked at you.
“Y/N, I want to make love to you. May I?” Hearing him ask for consent sent shivers down your spine. Being the gentleman he was, it was expected for him to be so polite and gentle. He knew how much of an activist you were, for almost every current topic out there. You were huge on consent. You bit your lip and smiled at him. In return, his cheesy smile formed. His cheeks turned red, and you had no doubt yours were as well.
“Yes.” You replied, becoming hotter by the second. Steve’s smile become even larger, which you didn’t think was possible. Oh God was he adorable when smiling. You grew impatient and grabbed the back of his neck and pulled his lips back down to yours. Steve brought his hand up to your breast from your hip, and began to gently massage it. You let out a gentle whimper, and in return Steve chuckled.
You dropped your hands to the edge of his shirt, tugging it upwards. Steve realized your attempt to rid him of his button up. He brought his upper body up, resting his weight on his knees which were placed aside of your hips. He unbuttoned his shirt while looking at you. His eyes were much darker than you were used to––full of lust. He had a slight smirk and kept eye contact until the very last button. He quickly tossed the shirt across the room, wasting no time to remove his undershirt. Your mouth fell open at the sight of his torso. It was as if he belonged in a museum; each muscle was perfect and detailed, as if he was carved from marble.
You ran your hands down his torso, starting from his shoulders. You made sure to caress his collar bones, lining them with your fingertips. You brought your hands down the middle of his chest to feel his abdomen. Yet again, just like marble, it was smooth. He was very hot to the touch, making it obvious how much he wanted you.
“How about we get you out of that dress, doll?” he asked with confidence. You smiled and nodded. You were quite happy that your reception dress wasn’t too difficult to get out of, yet, was still a task. Steve removed himself from above you and let you turn around. You turned your back towards him, yet remained on the bed, sitting on your heels. Steve took his time unzipping your dress, letting the sound echo through-out the room. Goosebumps formed on your back from feeling the cool air against your hot skin.
Once he finished unzipping, Steve placed his hands at the base of your neck, pushing your straps down your shoulders, then arms, slowly. His hands were just as warm as his torso, which allowed you to relax. You took your arms out from the straps of your dress, yet let the lacy material rest at your hips. From behind you, Steve began to kiss in between your neck and right shoulder. It started out sweet and little, but slowly gained passion and impatience. Surprising you, Steve licked a stripe up the right side of your neck. You gasped slightly, but relaxed against him. As you began to lean against his chest, he started to nibble on your ear. You let out a whimper, louder than you expected. Steve immediately stopped what he was doing.
“Did I hurt you? Are you okay?” he quickly questioned. You smiled at his concern.
“I’m fine, love. I’m enjoying it,” you reassured him. You now turned around to face him. You wanted to kiss his neck, and shoulders and nibble his ears as he did to you, but he was too damn tall. He laughed as you struggled to reach him. You slapped his bicep in protest.
“How dare you mock me!” you proclaimed, crossing your arms against your chest and pouting. Steve laughed even more at this. Jokingly, you ran off the bed and around the room. Steve followed you, trying to catch you. Steve obviously wasn’t running to his full capacity; he enjoyed watching you run in your lingerie. Even though he wasn’t running as fast as he could, you certainly were. He finally caught you in the bathroom, bending down to pick you up from your waist. You laughed and giggled as he growled at you, and you fought with all might to escape his arms. Alas, you couldn’t escape. Steve carried you to the bed and gently tossed you on the mattress. You screamed with delight, and watched him climb on top of you.
“You look too damn good in that lingerie,” he growled. Steve’s voice grew huskier and more aggressive. You noticed the bulge in his pants was quite larger than earlier.
“Language, Cap!” you responded. He smirked at you and shook his head.
“Although, I bet you look better without it,” he remarked. You jolted up towards him, resting your head on his chest. Steve’s hands tried to unclasp your bra, but he struggled. You appreciated the little moments that Steve showed weakness; all Steve had to do was be strong. Being weak for him was only a reminder of what life was like pre-serum.
He sighed angrily and concluded, “I can’t get it.” You caressed his face and smiled.
“It’s okay, dear.” You reached behind you and unclasped it yourself, thus removing your bra. Your face became hot, and you knew your cheeks were as red as roses. Steve rubbed your cheeks with his thumbs, then placed his hands on your lower back, pushing you against him. Steve hadn’t looked down at your chest yet, and you wondered why. He answered this question silently, as his hands found the hem of your underwear, which his gently slid down your legs.
“Lay down and take them off, doll,” he asked. He followed his statement by covering his eyes. You did as told, discarding your underwear.
“Okay. Open your eyes,” you exclaimed, anticipating his response. Steve opened his eyes, and his jaw fell agape. His eyes roamed your body, from your chest to midsection. Your lower abdomen began to tingle and butterflies rose again in your stomach.
“So. Damn. Beautiful,” His breath came out heavily with each word. You sat up, changing your position to rest on your hands and knees. You crawled over to the edge of the bed where Steve stood. Once you reached him, you lifted your torso. You slid your hands down his chest, then abdomen until you reached his belt. Keeping eye contact, you undid his belt. Of course, you struggled, and ended up looking at the belt to undo it. Steve stroked your hair as you did so. You finally managed to undo his belt and then the pants’ button and zipper. Steve helped you and pulled down his pants. You couldn’t help but giggle at the bulge in his briefs.
“What?” he questioned you, smirking. He turned and walked towards the dresser to grab a condom.
“I pegged you for something more classic than briefs.” You recalled how he wears his pants so high on his waist and how all his shirts are tucked in. He turned back towards you, holding the condom in his hand.
“Oh really now?” he chuckled.
“Mhmm,” you replied. He turned back towards you, holding the condom in his hand.
“You know,” he began, “I’ve never really seen one of these, let alone used one.”
“Well, I’ve never used one either. But, I’m sure I can help you, considering how much porn I’ve watched.” Steve gasped jokingly.
“My baby, Y/N, watching pornography? Never!”
You laughed, grabbing the condom from his hands. You gained a little bit of bedroom-confidence, and put the wrapped condom in your mouth. You grabbed Steve by the hem of his briefs and pulled him towards the edge of the bed. With your fingers still hooked in the hem, you pulled them down. Steve assisted by kicking them off the rest of the way. You ripped open the package in your mouth using your teeth. Steve watched you with an intense glaze over his eyes. You rolled the condom over him, taking your time as you did so. Once you had finished, you placed your lips against the top of his abdomen, and then continued placing kisses down his happy trail.
You finally took him in your hands. Steve rubbed the top of your head with his right hand, comforting you. You swirled your tongue around the tip, causing Steve to twitch. Next you licked a stripe on his underside. You heard Steve stifle a moan. You then began to take him, inch by inch. Steve was slowly yet surely beginning to unravel. Watching him unwind and melt unto you was pure joy. You were so used to seeing Steve stressed out and serious, even while alone with you. Finally seeing him in such a state only made you fall more in love. With all your knowledge from watching so much porn, you knew to hallow your cheeks. This caused Steve to buck his hips against your mouth.
“Shit, Y/N,” he growled at you. You gained a newfound confidence in this task and moved a bit faster. Using your left hand, you began to massage his balls. Steve bit his lip and tightened his grip on your hair. He began to try and guide your head with the same hand, but you refused his control. You could feel Steve twitch more and more as you gained speed.
“Mmm, baby-doll. I-I’m so close…” he trailed off, tossing his head back. Right before he was about to orgasm you stopped. Steve growled lightly, obviously agitated that you wouldn’t let him. In his fit of anger, he threw you back against the bed. You were frightened slightly, but not too much. Steve immediately regretted his actions, and his eyebrows relaxed and his eyes widened.
“Shit! Y/N, are you alright?” he asked. You laughed.
“What’s so funny?” Steve questioned. It took you a minute to regain control over your laughter.
“You were angry that I didn’t let you orgasm so you threw me! And watching a full grown naked man throw me is something I’d never thought would happen.” Steve chuckled slightly, but was still concerned if you were okay.”
“Baby, I’m fine,” you reassured him. Steve’s face changed from concerned to enlightened. You saw the lightbulb turn on above his head.
“I have an idea to make it up to you,” Steve crawled on the bed, grabbing you by your thighs and wrapping them around his head. He wrapped his left arm around your hips, placing his hand across you belly button. His hot breath lingered across your skin, causing goosebumps to rise. Your core tingled with immensity.
“W-where did you learn to d-do this?” you breathed out, obviously overwhelmed by what was about to happen. You knew Steve had never eaten a girl out before, and you were excited to be his first.
“You’re not the only one who watches porn. Somebody got me up to speed,” he answered. You bit your lip once you felt his voice against you. You didn’t even bother to ask who gave him porn, you just wanted his tongue against you.
“I’ll still need some guidance,” Steve admitted. Fuck, you thought. If only Steve knew how many times you’d gotten off to having him be submissive. You moaned in agreement.
Steve kissed your thighs multiple times, occasionally sucking and nipping at your skin. You were a tight coil of rope which slowly unraveled beneath him. Steve appeared timid to go in, so you told him what you wanted. Steve happily obliged, eager to please his bride. He dragged his nose through your folds, then dragging his lips back down. You immediately grasped at the sheets you rested upon, treasuring the sensation.
Steve took this as encouragement. He placed his lips not even centimeters away from your sex, and whispered, “Does my baby-girl like that?”
Before you could respond, Steve’s tongue was navigating your labia, causing you to moan. Steve growled against you, sending vibrations upwards. You bucked your hips against him, enjoying it. Steve flattened his tongue against your clit, and began licking short strokes. He then sucked hard, stimulating multiple groans from you. The sensations were unbelievable. You’ve masturbated yourself countless times, but you’ve never felt the way Steve was currently making you feel.
The hand he rested across your stomach was brought down further, allowing his thumb to take the place of his tongue. He began rubbing very slow circles around your clit. He teased you by gently playing with your entrance with his tongue. He finally put his tongue fully inside you, licking your walls. You were almost at your breaking point. Steve knew you were almost there, and moved quickly. As you did to him, he stopped before you came. But, he moved quickly, and pulled you into his lap. With your back against him, he moved his right hand down to your sex and got to work. He worked slowly again, using two fingers to massage your labia. You threw your head back against him, grabbing his left hand with yours. Steve picked up speed, nibbling on your left shoulder. You melted underneath his touch, breathing heavily. Steve was now working quickly––he was set on making you orgasm. His left hand now gripped your breast, playing with it as he took care of you. Your breaths became desperate, and more and more sounds escaped your lips, encouraging Steve.
“I’m s-so c-“ you couldn’t even finish your sentence because of how paradise-like this was.
“I know baby-doll. Are you going to cum for me?” Steve questioned. You couldn’t answer.
Steve took a risk and asked, “Are you going to cum for Daddy?” It set you off. You rode his hand as you came, whimpering and writhing against him. Steve was obviously pleased that you enjoyed the new dirty talk. You knew such behavior was very difficult for Steve, considering that he was a classic gentleman. You appreciated his efforts to please you.
“How did you know I have a daddy-kink?” you asked once you caught your breath.
“Really wanna know?” You nodded.
“Romanoff told me.” he replied.
“Of course. Who else?” You both laughed. Steve began kissing down your neck again, his hands roaming your body. You moaned and smirked in response, your hands traveling up to his head. You tugged on his hair as he explored your body.
“I’ve been dying to do this since we met, Y/N,” he said, moving you and picking you up bridal style. He placed you with your head on the pillow, then hovered above you.
“Tell me about it, Cap,” you said, as you yourself let your hands roam his body, enjoying his marble-like features. You squeezed his ass and gently slapped it. Steve sure as hell was shocked when you did this, but nonetheless enjoyed it. You laughed at his response and he blushed.
“Don’t be embarrassed,” you consoled, “it’s new to the both of us. Exploration such as this is normal, right?”
“Yeah, definitely,” he managed. Steve kissed all over you: your jaw, *décolleté, shoulders and chest. He seemed nervous to do the actual deed. You tried encouraging him through your actions, by giving back his affection through kisses and touches. Steve seemed to notice.
“I don’t want to hurt you. I know it’s your first and I’m really concerned––“ you put your finger to his lips.
“Shh. You won’t hurt me. I trust you,” you looked in his eyes. Steve managed a nervous smile and nodded. You stroked his face. He aligned himself with you and slowly pushed himself in you. You whimpered slightly. Steve stopped and pulled out. You appreciated the break to adjust.
“Keep going,” you instructed. You gripped his right hip with your left hand and bit your lip as Steve continued. Steve let out a deep breath against your neck causing your skin to tingle. You’ve owned quite a few toys in your lifetime, but nothing compared to Steve. His size was almost too much to bear.
“I’m in,” Steve informed you.
“Just, stay for a minute. I need to adjust to this,” you spoke. Steve said okay, and kissed and fondled your breasts. After a few seconds passed, you finally were okay with the situation downstairs. You wrapped your free hand around the back of his neck.
“Ready?” Steve questioned. You nodded. Steve began slowly, pulling and pushing his hips. Steve was keen on avoiding harming you. It hurt a little bit at first, but nothing you weren’t used to from your toys. It always hurt a little bit initially. This slight pain caused you to wince and Steve noticed.
“Baby, I’m fine,” you assured him. Steve looked so concentrated and you loved him for it. His eyebrows were furrowed together and he was holding in his breath. You giggled a bit.
“Babe, breathe. Don’t hurt yourself in protecting me. This isn’t a battlefield. It’s a bedroom. Relax,” you said, rubbing his back.
“O-okay,” he responded. Steve began to quicken his pace. You pulled him closer to you, following by kissing and sucking on his collar bones.
Steve finally gained a rhythm, not too slow nor too fast. He was learning how to move his hips, and you guided him by placing your hands on them. It took him a little bit, but soon Steve was a master at rolling his hips. Your brain was clouded in ecstasy and you could barely think. Yet, you still could think of riding him. Its all you wanted to do. You caressed Steve’s face and asked him to stop.
“Is everything okay? Are–are you enjoying it?” Steve asked in distress.
“Oh my goodness, Steve, I’m in pure bliss! I just want to switch positions, that’s all. Stop worrying, babe.”
“Oh, okay,” Steve nodded with a smile. You and Steve switched, him now underneath you. You kissed all over his collarbones and chest, sucking on one of his nipples. Steve drew a sharp breath when you did this, obviously enjoying this newfound pleasure. You finally aligned yourself with him and slid down his shaft. Steve watched you with intense focus, mesmerized by you. You began rolling your hips forwards and backwards. Deep, soft moans emerged from the back of Steve’s throat, encouraging you. You responded with your own moans, which only turned Steve on more. Steve placed his hands on your hips, tightly gripping them and guiding you. Your hips became faster and your core became needier. You had placed your hands on Steve’s chest for balance. Your hips changed from rolling to bouncing. You couldn’t wait anymore. You wanted more of him.
“Oh God, baby-doll,” Steve growled.
“Steve,” you gasped, trying so hard to tell him what you wanted.
“Yes, Y/N?” You gulped down a big breath.
“F-fuck me,” you spoke, barely loud enough for him to hear.
“What was that?” Steve asked.
“You heard me.”
“God damnit Steve I want you to fuck me!” you exclaimed, knowing that Steve heard you loud and clear the first time. A smirk stretched across Steve’s rosy lips as he flipped you over on your back again. You now both had confidence and full trust in each other in the bedroom. Steve finally, finally, fucked you. He thrusts were harsh and quick, hitting you in your g-spot each time. You cried out in ecstasy, dragging your nails down his shoulder blades. Steve grabbed your left leg and brought it above his right shoulder, giving him better access to your core. Steve was growling as he fucked you, letting each growl resonate throughout the room.
“Steve!” you cried out, probably thousands of times, but this one was the most desperate.
“Wait for me, baby-doll,” Steve commanded. It was difficult not to climax right then and there, but you were willing to wait. Steve’s thrusts became sloppy and his face was stricken with pleasure. You threw your head back as the two of you climaxed together. Steve slowed down, letting you ride out your orgasm. Once you both had come down from your highs, Steve collapsed next you, resting his lips on your shoulder.
Reminder that it does not help to deliberately upset yourself with the discourse
Take a break, get off Tumblr, go outside, watch TV, watch Netflix; it doesn’t matter, just stop looking at it.
You know who you are and where you belong and people on the internet can’t change that.
Take care of yourself and disengage