The 2017 ALL CAPS Exchange: The Fic

Here it is, everyone: The list of stories written for the 2017 ALL CAPS Exchange. Thank you so much to everyone who wrote, betaed, pinch hit, treated, and otherwise helped make this exchange such an incredible success. Enjoy the stories!

Adventures in Haberdashery by ErinKatz for anonissue

2k. G. Nate Schmdit/Braden Holtby. “Yeah, nope. I was going to do this tomorrow, between practice and game time, but you need to get out of this goalie trance, man, so we’re doing it tonight.” Nate holds out both hands. Braden still has no idea what’s going on and he’s still certain that Nate should be going to bed, but lets himself be pulled to his feet from where he’s sitting at the foot of the bed. He must be more tired than he feels because he stumbles and has to catch himself with a palm against Nate’s chest.

back to you by alotofthingsdifferent for Wargasms

1k. G. Micheal Latta/Tom Wilson. There are three games left in the regular season, and the Rangers haven’t been a playoff team in five years. Tom thinks maybe it’s time. “You look good, Tommy,” Mike says by way of a greeting, and when he smiles, his eyes crinkle at the corners. There are a few more wrinkles there than Tom remembers, but he’s still the same Mike, still as handsome as ever. Tom fills with a familiar warmth, the feeling he always gets when he sees Mike in person, and kicks at Mike’s feet under the table. “You’re going grey,” Tom teases, and Mike’s grin widens as he runs his fingers through his hair.

Can’t Have You by sunshinexbomb for constantine

6k. T. Nicklas Backstrom/André Burakovsky/Marcus Johansson. Nicky doesn’t want to get married, not yet at least. And maybe, just maybe, there’s a part of him that knows who he’d like to marry if he could be given that option, but. It’s probably better not to think about it. – In which Prince Nicklas of Sweden has to find a husband before his thirtieth birthday, but all he really wants is to maybe marry his best friend instead.

Capital Grounds by constantine for thegraceinyoureyes

2k. T. Nicklas Backstrom/T.J. Oshie. The love of TJ’s winter comes in several afternoons a week to buy a small Swedish coffee and something from their pastry case while TJ gazes at him.

champions by angularmomentum for screamlet

2k. E. André Burakovsky/Tom Wilson. Tom had a problem. To be more accurate, Tom had several problems but that was the way of Tom’s life. He often had a few running in tandem. Tonight they included but were not limited to: bruised knuckles (regular problem) forgot his toothbrush (also a regular problem) and a boner for Burky (definitely NOT a regular problem.)

come under the covers by ghosthunter for taxingme

4k. M. André Burakovsky/Tom Wilson. Andre meets him at the airport. He has a tan and he looks good. Not that Tom thinks he, himself, does not also have a tan and look good, but he’s not picking himself up at the airport in a foreign country either.

домовинами by constantine for xihale

5k. T. Nicklas Backstrom/Evgeny Kuznetsov. If only his parents had been more traditional rusalki. Sure, the Miass is cold in the winter, and it was nice to live in a warm apartment instead of sleeping down in the river mud so he had the chance to play youth hockey, and sure, his father liked to be able to watch episodes of Ulitsa Razbitykh Fonarey as they aired instead of having to wait for DVD. But Evgeny’s romantic future had been on the line. Or: Nicky and Kuzy are from different species, with different conventions when it comes to courting. Efforts to ask to join his pack/be his mate fail spectacularly.

Evergreen Molasses and Gilded Heartbreaks by xihale for angularmomentum

4k. T. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. In his dreams, Alex still plays hockey. Alex just passed his career 1,000 points. Alex is one of the hundred greatest NHL players of all time. And every milestone, everywhere he turns, Nicklas is there.

Fault Lies by hoosierbitch for somethingnerdythiswaycomes

6k. M. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. Alex kneels.“You’re smarter than me,” Trotz says to Nicky, “but I do know what I’m doing.” Right now, Nicky is fairly sure that he’s wrong on both counts. “Let me be his coach. Let me take care of him.”

feels like summer by Thorne for protect_rosie

30k. M. Karl Alzner/John Carlson, Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. The unglamorous fact of the matter is that lifeguarding, particularly at a community swimming pool, is much less about the dramatic rescues and slo-mo dives into the water that Baywatch has tricked people into believing, and much more about janitorial work that’s either tedious or gross, spiked with the occasional scraped knee or elbowed nose or no-holds-barred ice cream vendor death-match in the parking lot. (Or, Karl’s in love with his best friend, all the local community pools in the Metropolitan county are at prank-war with each other, and also there are ducks.)

get by with a little help (from our A) by Wargasms for AetherSeer

11k. E. Michael Latta/Tom Wilson, Michael Latta/Tom Wilson/Nicklas Backstrom. Mike is a switch without much experience at Domming. Tom is a sub. They figure out how to make it work with some help from Nicky.

Good Friend Alex by WeagleRock for Guzmanasol

4k. T. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. Nicke was already going to die a slow, painful death for the love of a faerie. He’d have to be the world’s stupidest person to turn around and fall for a troll.

Half Of The Time We’re Gone by angularmomentum for waspabi

36k. E. Tom Wilson/Michael Latta, Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. Mike never thought Tom would come back to Kitchener. That was his first problem. The second was that he didn’t want him to, which was a slightly bigger issue.

i’ll never let go by taxingme for Louhi

13k. M. Micheal Latta/Mike Richards. There’s a thousand and one theories about where and why Travellers go where they do. Mike’s not sure about anyone else but he only ever goes to Michael.

in fingertips, in teeth by pr_scatterbrain for hoosierbitch

11k. M. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin/Alexander Semin, Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin, Alexander Ovechkin/Alexander Semin. “You’re going to hit the ground running,” Nicky’s agent tells him, before he arrives on US soil. Nicky mostly hits the ground again and again.

imploring harvest by chartreuser for Fourthlinewinger

20k. M. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. Nicke just wants to play hockey, eat some iPhones, and watch his boyfriend photosynthesise.

The Kindness of Strangers by angularmomentum for thegraceinyoureyes

17k. E. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. Nicke has created a life of careful boundaries.

Literally by xabier for maunnier (jbmaunier)

4k. T. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. In which Nicklas Backstrom is literally Andre Burakovsky’s father.

A little nip from every flower by anonissue for spaceyho

4k. T. Michael Latta/Tom Wilson. Nate finally just up and face-times Mike after Mike sends him one too many questions about how to properly julienne carrots, and the conversation quickly redirects from the actual cooking to the status of Tom’s health and how poorly Mike is coping with him being out of action. “Trotz had us run different lines yesterday in practice man, and now I’m on Beags’ wing, and it’s, just,” Mike makes an inarticulate frustrated noise as he mashes garlic cloves with the back of a spoon more forcefully than strictly necessary. “It’s shit. We suck.” “You know,” Nate starts and then pauses. “What?” Mike prompts after a few seconds of silence. “It’s stupid, but like, my mom always believed the fastest way to get rid of a cold or whatever was to give it to someone else,” Nate says shrugging. – Mike feels like playing hockey without Willy on his line far outweighs the shittiness of being sick. Tom doesn’t agree. Mike has to take measures.

Match Your Weakness With A Name by leyley09 for screamlet

4k. T. Andre Burakovsky/Braden Holtby. In which Braden gets talked into playing spin-the-bottle with his teammates and - surprisingly - doesn’t live to regret it

A More Fascinating Name by pukeandcry for hardtoconcentrate

38k. E. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin, Andre Burakovsky/Braden Holtby, Michael Latta/Tom Wilson. Although Sasha had never made the younger Mr. Backstrom’s acquaintance, he was at least familiar enough with his reputation to know that chief amongst his qualities was the quite publicly known fact that Mr. Backstrom was as notoriously uninterested in achieving an advantageous marriage as Sasha himself.Something, then, must have upset the order of things. What that was he could not say, but Lord Backstrom was now, it would seem, in active search of a husband for his son.

My Life’s Work by protect_rosie for leyley09

2k. G. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. Alex comes in on a Tuesday night, a couple of hours before closing time.

no it’s not nirvana but it’s on the way by ghosthunter for taxingme

4k. M. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. Sasha does not miss the way Backy looks at him then, sharp and angry, and Sasha knows he deserves it. They sit in awkward silence until the waitress comes to take their drink orders.

Not a zero sum game by Guzmanasol for pr_scatterbrain

3k. Not rated. Alexander Ovechkin/Alexander Semin, Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin, Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Semin, Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin/Alexander Semin. His first soulmate gets another soulmate over the summer.

An Ocean Not to Break by hardtoconcentrate for kingsoftheimpossible

2k. G. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. Every offseason feels like a bad taste in their mouths, the remnants of a dream turned into a nightmare time and time again. After a while, the commentators start discussing if the Russian Federation lied about Sasha carrying the cursebreaking gene full stop; it gets bad enough that Don Cherry calls publicly for him to submit to gene sequencing. “It’s fine,” Sasha insists one morning, as they’re watching Sportscenter before an early morning skate. Nicklas can see his eyes tighten around the edges when Cherry comes back on-screen, raving about how typical this dishonesty is from the Russians. “He doesn’t know what he’s talking about,” Nicke mutters, sparing another glance at Sasha before sighing and resting his cheek against the table. A cursebreaker AU.

Red is the Color (of Your True Love’s Blood) by Saebrin for WeagleRock

2k. T.  Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. What are the odds that all of Jakub’s teammates are serial killers? Like, statistically that has to be impossible, right?

say all that you’re feeling by screamlet for sunshinexbomb

43k. T. Andre Burakovsky/Alexander Ovechkin. Much had happened in the past year, enough that Andre sat on the hill overlooking the lands he had been naive enough to call home until he pledged himself to Lord Laich and left his friends with barely a note. Now he had returned and— Who would want Andre now? A flash of lightning in the distance illuminated the one house he hadn’t yet considered. After a moment’s thought, Andre rode south.

Six Months by constantine for xihale

14k. T. Nicklas Backstrom/Evgeny Kuznetsov. “The Snow Queen only looks at what she takes, now,” Sasha said. “And she always takes something, from everywhere she goes.”“Yes. I know what winter’s like,” Evgeny said, and shrugged against the back of the seat. He didn’t want to ask questions or hear answers, when Sasha was sitting blunt and solid next to him, talking like an old folktale Evgeny could half, but only half, convince himself he knew.“No,” Sasha said. “Not just like the flowers and all that from summertime. Those die back for the winter, but they have roots and they grow again, always. Winter is just dark, time to rest. The Snow Queen comes with the real deep cold. What she takes, it doesn’t come back.”

something just like this by maunnier (jbmaunier) for oops_ohdear

2k. T. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. Nicklas was eleven years old when he met Prince Alexander of Dynamo for the first time.

Something Old, Something New by Rave for pukeandcry

6k. E. Michael Latta/Tom Wilson. “I’m into guys,” Mike had told him before they moved in together. “If we’re gonna be roommates, that’s gotta be cool with you. I don’t want it to turn out to be a thing later.”

The Sorcerer of the Wood by Fourthlinewinger for ghosthunter

53k. T. Marcus Johansson/Evgeny Kuznetsov. Marcus opened his mouth to say, ‘I’m worried about Burky, no one knows where he is,’ but what came out was: “I think Koschei the Deathless kidnapped Burky,” and the locker room went quiet. Marcus winced and looked down at Kuzy, who appeared shocked and slightly pale. Marcus closed his eyes against the worry and his own rising embarrassment. It sounded crazy, out loud.They were in California, not Russia. It was just an exhibit. Thousands of other people had visited without incident, no curses or hexes causing trouble, and there were definitely no kidnappings. Burky sometimes got distracted and climbed into the wrong car. He was probably stranded in San Francisco. Marcus scrubbed his hands through his hair. “How do I get him back?”

staying put by thegraceinyoureyes for tiptoe39

7k. E. Nicklas Backstrom/T. J. Oshie, T. J. Oshie/Washington Capitals Ensemble. There are bodies—hands all over him, all around him.

sugar by ghosthunter for sunshinexbomb

4k. M. Nicklas Backstrom/André Burakovsky/Marcus Johansson. Nicke’s almost ready to leave, his jacket still off, his tie around his neck. “He’s fucking with you,” Nicke says quietly, coming to stand next to Andre as he ties his own tie. “And you looked at his ass when he walked away.”

Summoner’s Rift by xabier for maunnier (jbmaunier)

3k. T. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. Ovi too OP, Rito pls nerf.

A Swedish Crown Is Just Seven Rubles by Louhi for alotofthingsdifferent

25k. M. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. Alex was twenty when he went to the Olympics for the first time. He did not win a medal, but he did meet a prince. Then he met him again. And again.

to have and to hold by oops_ohdear for xabier

6k. T. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. The problem with putting a fake engagement photo, complete with stupid smiles and a bottle of champagne, on Facebook, is that sometimes someone’s mother sees it. This is not a problem Nicklas ever had before he knew Alex.

Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow? (series) by AetherSeer for chartreuser

4k. T. Evgeny Kuznetsov & Alexander Ovechkin. By Royal Appointment / And They Called It Puppy Love / It’s My Choice to Make. If Zhenya gets a little crush on his older, good-looking, ridiculously fit bodyguard, it’s fine, right? It’s normal. He’ll get over it, sooner or later, and no one will ever know the difference.

Wolfborn by waspabi for 13058

54k. E. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. A wolfborn on an airplane was either unbearably reckless or a hockey player. Most of the time, both.

Words Just Get in the Way by somethingnerdythiswaycomes for Rave

8k. T. Andre Burakovsky/Braden Holtby, Michael Latta/Tom Wilson. “You’re pretty gone on him, huh?” Mike asks him. Andre nods. “And you don’t know anything about him?” Andre nods again, glumly. “This is the semester,” Mike proclaims with enough conviction that Andre almost believes him. “This semester, you’re getting him.”

You May Be Right (I May Be Crazy) by spaceyho for Thorne

10k. M. Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin. Nicklas sets his phone back on the counter, and blinks at the fogged over reflection in his mirror. He is so utterly fucked. He hasn’t made the decision to go to Russia, but he has made the decision to make that decision. It’s basically the same thing, but there’s enough of a difference that he feels like he can justify stalling making it final. –or OviNicky: The Lockout

Anyway, I wrote a story for the ALL CAPS exchange, which you can read if you want. Or don’t!

feels like summer on AO3, 29K (for now), Alzner/Carlson with some background Backstrom/Ovechkin and the Caps ensemble.

Summary: The unglamorous fact of the matter is that lifeguarding, particularly at a community swimming pool, is much less about the dramatic rescues and slo-mo dives into the water that Baywatch has tricked people into believing, and much more about janitorial work that’s either tedious or gross, spiked with the occasional scraped knee or elbowed nose or no-holds-barred ice cream vendor death-match in the parking lot.

(Or, Karl’s in love with his best friend, all the local community pools in the Metropolitan county are at prank-war with each other, and also there are ducks.)

Technically it’s complete and stands alone where it is right now, but there’s roughly about 10K more I had planned/didn’t edit in time; however, I never met a deadline I didn’t like to run adrift on, so, uh. More to come!

6

So I had quite a day, to say the least. Went to optional morning skate, saw Ness and Walker practicing, stood by the glass at the end and had pucks shot at my face, and at one point Walker skated over to where I was and saw me and I think he might have smiled.

I went out to wait for the players, and after awhile Beags came out. He was super nice, and I even said to him “That was a beautiful shorty you had last night” and he said “Oh, thank you!”
It took awhile for anybody else to come out, and I totally missed Conno and Orpik and Ovi because of how starstruck I was feeling. But I got pictures with Nicky, Willy, Burky, and Holts. I honestly didn’t expect anybody to be there at all, so this was a HUGE pleasant surprise for me and I’m so happy and kind of in disbelief that I managed to do this. Like I can’t describe the feeling I had in my gut when Nicky and Andre and everyone were just there right in front of me. Like oh my god. It was unreal.

I definitely plan on doing this again sometime when I have time, but who knows when that will be. I’ll definitely let you know when I’m planning on going again so I can see some of you. Shoutout to all the people I saw today and to the girls who helped me take pictures. I had an awesome time!!

Hockey Penalties and other phrases

  • Too many men = too much man.
  • Icing = skate too slow, team too tired
  • “Play is under review” = 4 blind men didn’t see the play and now will spend 15 minutes trying to revive their eyesight.
  • Off-sides = skate too fast, no goal for you, dumb af
  • High sticking = stick to yourself, no one wants your stick in their face.
  • Goaltender Interference = no idea, such bullshit.
  • Roughing = too touch, much bad touch
  • Game Misconduct = very bad touch
  • Fighting = slight scuffle, mostly hugs.

Is your (hockey) tumblr also being flooded by more bad news about the orange cheeto in the Oval Office? Are you also a disappointed hockey fan, pissed off with the NHL? Or worse - are you a Pens fan and cried yourself to sleep last night, because you hate that your own team did wrong?

Well, don’t despair, for I have a remedy post of fluff for you! Filled with soft boys, epic hockey bromances, Instagram chirping, puppies and the smile of Gabriel Landeskog. (Not that it solves anything to close your eyes to stuff that is wrong in the world, but a bitch can only take so much!)

Enjoy!

THOUGHTS OF A HOCKEY FAN

1.) “Why’d they blow the play dead?”

2.) “How is that even a penalty?”

3.) “What is ‘goaltender interference’?”

4.) “How the shit is that goaltender interference?”

5.) “That was the weakest penalty call I’ve ever seen.”

6.) “What the fuck are you even doing ref?”

7.) “ThAt’S nOt A pEnAlTy YoU bLiNd FuCk.”

8.) “Shut up Pierre.”

9.) “I hate every single one of these players, why are you even in the NHL.”

10.) “I can’t actually believe I’m watching beer league players.”

11.) “Wait…. When did he get traded? Who even are these people.”

12.) “I hate hockey and the players hate me.”

13.) “Oh there’s gonna be a figh–false alarm, they just hugged.”

14.) “Our goalie is going to kill every single one of his teammates and I might actually help.”

15.) “What the actual hell is our coach even doing? Can he be fired pls.”

Bonus: “I miss hockey.”

If only there was an international event that NHL players wanted to go to.

Originally posted by nansgifs