so a little while ago, I put out a post asking for suggestions on what to write for keiths birthday. @radiofreekerberos suggested shiro throw keith a surprise party (thank you sm btw), and I tried a lot of different ideas but nothing was coming lol so went to my default which is sicfics. and even then here I present the worst thing ive ever written :P
but the only way i wouldnt write for my boys birthday is if i was dead.
Fall was a pretty good season. Pretty colours, Halloween, pumpkin spice everything, perfect jacket and scarf weather—usually. Today, Keith had realized too late, was perfect raincoat and boots weather.
He shivered, pulling his sweater tighter around his shoulders. He was already miserable, and now this. Granted, it was just a light rain, but he had also been plagued with a persistent case of the sniffles. After sneezing and shaking all day, suffering through school and work like a braindead zombie, Keith was more than ready to go home and rest, rain be damned.
When he had clocked out of work, he’d felt a nagging in the back of his mind, like he’d been forgetting to do something. But he’d done everything he was supposed to, hadn’t he? Clean the tables, sweep the floors, empty the register, lock up. That was it. He’d done it all. Maybe he just felt off because he wasn’t usually the one to lock up he diner. It was Hunk’s diner, and he was usually the last one out, so naturally the one to lock up everyday. But today he’d left Keith in charge for the last hour before closing time, claiming he had some sort of important business to take care of. He refused to say what this business was, which was odd because Hunk usually never kept secrets. It was pretty much physically impossible for him, and even today he’d looked like he was about to burst.
It was odd, Keith thought, Hunk had been avoiding him most of the day. Unlike the odd feeling of a forgotten obligation.
Keith checked his bag. He went over all his possessions, taking inventory. Textbooks, work clothes, pencils and papers. A few assignments his professor had handed back today. Keith was actually pretty proud of those; they’d gotten good marks. Maybe he was forgetting an upcoming college project. He checked his phone, but there were no reminders.
After coming up emptyhanded, he decided to push away the feeling and just focus on getting warm. The rain was freezing, and his teeth were chattering, nose running, fingers numb. He wasn’t sure if it was raining harder now, and that was why he couldn’t see, or if his vision was just going blurry because he was exhausted. He didn’t care. He just wanted to be home, in bed. His clothes were soaked now, and his shoes pooled with water wherever he stepped, squelching on the pavement.
There were about two blocks to go until he would be home. Keith tried to focus on that. He plodded along, head down, trying and failing to avoid all the puddles. When he looked up to cross the street, his body couldn’t keep up with his eyes, and the world started spinning much too fast and he was stumbling out into the street.
A flash of headlights and the too-loud sound of a horn, the screech of brakes. The car slammed to a halt just feet away, spraying Keith in a shower of dirty puddle water. The driver screamed at him, but Keith couldn’t make out what was being said over the torrential downpour and the ringing of his ears. He scurried out of the road, trembling even harder because now not only was he freezing, but holy shit he’d almost been hit by a car.
The apartment door was locked. Shiro must not be home, Keith figured. He liked sharing an apartment with Shiro. It was easier on rent, and it was nice to not be alone. Keith had been alone a lot, and while he did like his solitude, Shiro had made him realize that being all alone all the time wasn’t all that great. Keith clumsily wiped the water from his face as he searched for his keys, and he didn’t want to admit it, but he wouldn’t be surprised if a few tears had been wiped with it, because now he was thinking about a little raven-haired kid, all alone on the streets, no idea who his mother was, no clue where his father went, scared and hungry and tired and ready to give up. Until Shiro had taken him in and given him a real family, for the first time.
Keith finally found his keys, and as he slid them into the lock he was silently berating himself for getting so emotional all of a sudden. What was wrong with him? Why couldn’t he get a grip? And why was he so cold? Pointless questions swirled in his mind, and the more he thought, the worse it got, until he found the strength to grip the door handle. At least he was pretty sure he did, he still couldn’t feel his fingers, all he wanted to do was get inside and go to bed, but there was still the feeling he’d forgotten something and not knowing was making him feel sick to his stomach—
Keith nearly toppled over backwards from the sheer force of the six voices all screaming in unison. He blinked, trying to take in the scene in front of him. Shiro, Hunk, Lance, Pidge, Allura and Coran were positioned around the room, wearing pointed paper hats and cheering and throwing streamers. Pidge had three kazoos sticking out of her mouth and was violently blowing out a tune that sounded oddly similar to “Here Comes the Bride,” and she was spread out like a starfish, holding a sparkly happy birthday banner that was nearly as big as her. Evidently it had been made by Lance, who was covered head to toe in glitter and waving around a bunch of balloons. Hunk stood behind the kitchen table in front of a cake. The yellow headband he always wore had been replaced by a weave of ribbons.
“Happy birthday, Keith!” Lance shouted.
Keith just stared at him.
“You didn’t forget your own birthday, did you?” Shiro asked. He had a large red gift box held in his arms.
Keith blinked again. He could see Allura and Coran out of the corner of his eye. Coran had his hands held behind his back. Allura’s were pulled up under her chin, excitedly awaiting Keith’s reaction.
Keith continued to stare. The room fell silent. The banner drooped. The gift was set down. The balloons stilled. Keith just stared, at his friends, the decorations, the cake. It was too much. Too much noise, too many sparkles, too many people. Too much for his rain-soaked, pounding head to compute all at once.
He felt his face grow hot. His knees went weak, and he sunk to the floor, and before he could stop himself, he was sobbing.
He didn’t process what was being said, but he heard voices, words. They sounded worried.
“Oh, dear.” Allura.
“Perhaps we surprised him too much.” Coran.
“Aw, gee, man, you walked all that way without an umbrella?” Lance.
“Guys, he doesn’t look so good.” Hunk.
Keith felt a pair of tiny hands gently finding his wrists, and he curled his fingers around them. Through a haze of tears, he saw light glinting off Pidge’s glasses. “Hey, Keith, what’s the matter?”
“I-I-I-I’m-I’m ss-sorry,” Keith cried. He wiped furiously at his eyes, fists stilled balled up with Pidge’s teeny little fingers. He could barely talk, his throat felt so tight. How could his face fell so hot when the rest of him was freezing cold?
“Hey, it’s okay, Keith, it’s okay.” Keith felt a strong, warm hand on his back, and he leaned towards it, into Hunk. Hunk was warm, and it helped ease Keith’s shaking.
“I’m sorry,” Keith repeated.
Shiro looked down at him thoughtfully. “What’s wrong?”
“I just…don’t feel very well.”
Suddenly there was a hand brushing his bangs from his forehead, blessedly cool on his too-hot face. Keith sighed in relief as Shiro moved closer and shifted the hand to cup his cheek, and press against his brow.
“He’s burning up,” Shiro said. Keith got the feeling Shiro wasn’t talking to him anymore, because everyone else seemed to jolt to attention.
“You mean he’s sick?” Lance asked worriedly.
“Aw, Keith, why didn’t you say anything?” Hunk frowned.
“Didn’t give me much of a chance,” Keith mumbled, chasing the last traces of tears from his face. He was still shivering.
Shiro wrapped an arm around his shoulders and helped him to his feet. “Let’s get you some dry clothes, huh?”
Keith nodded, and before he could protest Shiro was scooping him up off the ground. There wasn’t really any sense in trying to wriggle free now, Keith figured, was there? He coughed wetly, congestion settling in his lungs. He really should have taken an umbrella.
“We’re terribly sorry, Keith,” Allura said softly. “We thought a surprise party might be a good way to celebrate your birthday. I see now we were wrong.”
Keith shook his head lightly, managing a soft smile. “It’s okay, Allura.”
“Is there anything I can do? Perhaps Coran and I could run to the drugstore to get you some medicine?”
“Ye—” Keith was cut short by a harsh coughing fit.
“That would be great,” Shiro answered for him.
Shiro brought him to his room, helped him towel off his hair, and found him some dry pyjamas. Keith changed, and crawled into bed. The soft enclosure of blankets made him sleepy, and he vaguely thought that this was the most content he’d felt all day.
“You do know it’s your birthday today, right?” Shiro sat next to him on the bed.
“I, uh…might have forgot.”
Shiro sighed. “I’m really sorry, Keith. This whole surprise party was my idea. I know we never really did anything for your birthday other years, but this year I thought you might enjoy it. I’m sorry I’ve ruined your special day.”
“Shiro, you didn’t ruin anything. I’m sorry I messed it all up by getting sick. I—" Before he could say anything more, there was a knock at the door, and Lance, Hunk, and Pidge appeared. Hunk held a steaming mug of tea in his hands, which Keith accepted gratefully.
“How do you feel now?” Lance asked. He sat on Keith’s other side.
Keith decided to just be honest. He’d probably already made a fool of himself anyway. “I feel cold.” The rain had somehow seeped into his bones, and now he was chilled all the way through. Shiro put an arm around his shoulders and rubbed the goosebumps that dotted Keith’s bicep. Lance found his way to Keith’s side, and Pidge spread herself over his legs. Keith felt their warmth, their love and support, and he was pretty sure it was the best birthday present he had ever received. He told them as much.
“Oh, speaking of presents,” Hunk jumped up, “you still haven’t gotten to open yours.” He ducked out of the room and returned moments later with the red box. “From all of us,” he said.
Keith inspected it closely. Nobody had ever really given him a birthday present before, other than Shiro, and that had always been something like a candy bar, or a pair of socks. Not that Shiro didn’t care, of course, he just knew that Keith didn’t like making a big deal over things like that. This year was different, though. Keith had begun to come out of his shell, and Shiro had noticed, or else he wouldn’t be surrounded by all his closest friends right now.
Keith tentatively tore at the paper.
“Come on, dude, don’t be scared,” Lance grinned. “It isn’t gonna hurt you.”
Keith ripped the rest off, and opened the box. From the folds of tissue paper inside, he produced a thick, leather-bound book.
“Open it, “Shiro encouraged.
Keith flipped open the cover. The paper inside was a warm, off-white colour, thick and grainy. Each of his friends’ signatures were scrawled around the page, around a photo of the seven of them laughing and making silly faces. It was a scrapbook.
He turned the page, nervous under his friends’ expectant eyes. This page was filled with more photos, candid shots of playing video games with Pidge and Lance, him and Hunk with frosting on their noses, Shiro spraying them all with the hose, selfies in bathroom mirrors, sitting at coffee shops, walking down trails. Keith kept turning pages, a smile creeping up his face as he remembered all the days these pictures had been taken. There were other things, too, a movie ticket, a receipt from the hospital when Keith had broken his arm, a fallen leaf from the national park. There was so much, but all of it had one thing in common: every photo, every memory, was of a time when Keith and his friends had all been together.
“Wow, guys, I…I don’t know what to say. Thank you so much. You have no idea how much this means to me.”
“We’re glad you like it,” Hunk smiled.
“And look,” Pidge’s eyes glowed as she thumbed through the remaining pages, “we left you some blank ones, so that you can add your own stuff.”
Keith couldn’t help the dumb grin that was splitting his face. “Thank you,” he repeated. “I can’t believe you guys did all this for me. I’m just so sorry I messed it all up.”
“No way,” Shiro said. He tightened his grip around Keith’s shoulder. “You didn’t ruin anything. We’re sorry we forced this onto you.”
“Well, if it makes you feel any better, this is one birthday I’m sure to never forget,” Keith said. It was true. Not because he was sick, not because he’d burst into tears—though that would probably haunt him for some time—but because this birthday had been spent with people he cared about. And they, in turn, cared about him. Keith rested his head on Shiro’s chest and let his eyes flutter shut. He felt Lance’s breathing even out next to him, Pidge on his legs, and Hunk’s warmth by his feet.
By the time Allura and Coran returned with the medicine, the five of them were all asleep.
me, an Asian: [calls someone out for whitewashing Japanese characters in her American choir club AU]
that someone, a white person: [prioritises the American setting over the original Japanese setting] umm no I’m not whitewashing them? I’m 100% against whitewashing? you’re being ignorant and throwing around the term like it’s nothing? you just have a stick up your butt?
also that someone: btw if y'all see me whitewashing it’s your priority to give me the smacc of a lifetime! 😜 also I’m an otaku 😜😘
I did it!! I made it through my first powerlifting class!!! Before I go through a complete rundown of that, let’s get the food aspect out of the way.
I decided I was tired of using up so many of my precious carbs from the heavy cream in my ketochow so in my breakfast shake I used olive oil instead. It wasn’t horrible! It definitely didn’t come close to how amazing the shake is with cream but it might be a worthwhile trade-off for 0g carbs. Tomorrow I’m going to attempt a half oil/half cream concoction to see how that goes.
OKAY! POWERLIFTING BREAKDOWN:
I got up from my desk at 4:45 p.m. and went to change clothes in our bathroom. It was a tight fit in the tiny stall but I managed to change without any issue. Unfortunately, the toilet has no lid so I was constantly scared I’d drop something in there accidentally. Also, unfortunately, the toilet is autoflush so it flushed about 8 times while I was changing. Poor water waste :/ I successfully change and take a before scared face shot, shown above.
By 4:58 p.m. I’m driving out of the parking garage and on my way. Thankfully there was no traffic today so I was able to pull into the gym by 5:10 p.m. I look to my left and see there are no parking spots up front so I pull into the overflow parking behind the building and start to freak out before I see one final tiny spot between a row of cars and a big rig. I slowly pull in but am glad I was able to squeeze in there because I really have no idea where I’d park if that spot hadn’t been there. I thought by coming early I’d avoid a parking issue but apparently not. I guess I’ll try and come even earlier on Wednesday.
Carrying only my keys and my water bottle I walk as confidently as I can into the big scary gym. I sign in at the front desk and see the trainer for our class so I walk over to her and say hi. She’s in the middle of doing something with a band around her legs and lunges so I quickly try and take back my wave and pretend I was going in another direction. I stand awkwardly behind some of those hanging ring things (I don’t know what they’re called? The ones in the Olympics for gymnasts?) and try not to look like such a noob. I randomly try pretending I’m stretching my legs and arms while not knowing where to stand or how to stay out of the way. After about three very long painful minutes of this I go back to the front desk and tell the receptionist that today is my first day and I don’t know where to go or what to do. She flags down Beth, the instructor, who is still finishing her exercises and then tells me to wait until Beth is done and to just hang out until then. At this point I’m feeling like a total annoyance to Beth and I just want to crawl under a rock. So, I go back to my corner and try to look around without being a creep.
FINALLY, Beth comes around and asks one of the fellow students to show me the warm-up and he tells me he’ll be with me in just a minute. So, back to awkward standing I go. But then he comes back! He has me grab two 2.5lb weights (the circle ones that go on the end of a bar, what are they called? Plates? Just weights? idk) and use them to do an exercise called Scarecrow and then something that looks like I’m in a chorus line and then ugh, push-ups. I do the scarecrow and other one just fine and then when it’s time for push-ups I don’t quite know where to go to do them. I know my form is going to be beyond horrible so I don’t want to do them in the open in front of everyone but there’s also not really a good hiding place to do it. I suck it up and find a corner of a mat in the open area, get on my knees and bring my body down. I swear I almost collapse onto my belly but recover just a tiny bit in time. Honestly, the push-ups were the worst part of the entire hour.
OK. Now here we go into the meat of the class! Beth gathers the nine track one students around her and asks if there’s anyone that doesn’t know their “max.” I’m the only one to raise their hand. She pairs people up based on their height and max and then tells me to follow her. She asks if I have any lifting experience and I inform her that I have none. She actually says that’s great! So she can start me from the very beginning. She shows me to a station with a bench and puts hooks on a bar to create a rack for the weight. She then has me go into a storage closet to grab a pole and I’m super struggling carrying it back over to her. In my head I’m trying to figure out how I can lift this thing if I can barely carry it. She then gets on the bench and shows me what my form should look like. She has a huge arch in her back and it looks way uncomfortable. She then has me give it a try and tells me to lift just the bar. I lift the bar with no problem and she commends my form (!!!!!!!). She then proceeds to put more weight on until I can’t lift it anymore. Throughout all of this there’s a lot of just waiting around. At least this time while I’m doing nothing I feel like I’m at a station and have a purpose, to wait until she tells me to do something else.
At one point I can’t lift the weight they’ve put on there in two separate attempts so takes off five pounds (total) and I can do the lift just fine. So then she immediately puts the five pounds back on and has me try again in a bit. This time I’ve got it!! I even feel like I had my moment where I’m on the bench, doing a lift that I’ve been struggling with and I push through and get the bar back up while there’s this crowd of about 4 people around me cheering me on!!! SO ENCOURAGING! And this is just my first day!!!!! So, for now, my max weight is 75. We’ll see where I go from here! On Wednesday we focus on squats then deadlifts on Friday and back to bench next Monday and so on.
By 6:45 p.m. Beth tells the rest of us we can leave since it’s after 6:30 p.m. so I put away my weights and clips and lug the heavy bar back into the closet. I then try to say goodbye to Beth and thank her for my first day but she’s talking with someone so after two small attempts I say fuck it and just leave. Not angrily, mind you, just realizing that she probably doesn’t care!
I’m surprised my arms don’t feel more weak. That’ll probably come tomorrow? I get home a bit after 7 p.m. to find Kevin had dinner ready!! (of course it’s butter chicken) I know I can’t expect this every time but it sure was a nice surprise :) Then after dinner I immediately started making keto cheesecake because it’s Kevin’s birthday tomorrow.
I’m home, I’m happy, and I’m really pleased with how today went :)
Chapters: 1/10 Fandom: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends - All Media Types, Star Wars Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Darth Bane/Darth Zannah, Darth Zannah/Original Character(s) Characters: Darth Bane, Darth Zannah, Original Male Character(s) Additional Tags: Rough Sex, Extremely Rough Sex, Sith are Terrible People, But they love it, Age Difference, Size Difference, Angst and Porn, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, dubcon, torture porn, Zannah Tries to Fuck Her Feelings Away, It goes about as well as you think, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Multiple Orgasms, Wet & Messy, Rough Oral Sex, Blood Kink, Bloodplay, Marking, Autoerotic Asphyxiation, Light Sadism, This Looks Bad, But It’s All Enthusiastic and Consensual, BUT BEFORE ALL THIS, Self-Doubt, vague suicidal thoughts, Lack of Judgment, A REALLY GOOD Massage, Thanks Bane, Complicated Feels, Power Dynamics, Master and Apprentice Shenanigans, Bane is a Nerd, Bane Loves Power Summary:
Set immediately after “Rule of Two”.
Ambria leaves a scar that, no matter what she tries, Zannah cannot erase. Their future lies in Ciutric IV, but, plagued with self-doubt, Zannah can only struggle to maintain the facade that everything is alright…until the Force abandons her.
Or, alternatively, The One Where Sith Sex Solves Everyone’s Problems.
I feel like Robert was more jealous of Donny than Alex. They spent more time showing his jealousy.
NO NONNIE <3 JUST NO <3333
Yes Robert was jealous of Donnie. It made him say and do crazy things….
And it lasted for fucking ever… But really, it wasn’t about Chrissie. Not really. Otherwise he would have been equally as psychopathically upset about Cain kissing Chrissie…. instead of just using it as an opportunity for “blackmail”. (Suggo: He’s pretty but he’s hella thick sometimes)…
It was about Home Farm, the Whites, the kingdom he built around himself, the kingdom where he was safe and secure and the envy of all those people who looked down on him or dismissed him when he was a simple village greasemonkey.
Donnie had a claim through Lachlan to it all, a claim Robert couldn’t compete with back then (ughhh how times change). Robert was trading his tail. But Donnie was tied to the Whites through blood. He could get away with much worse and he could keep coming back.
What’s really interesting and beautiful, is that Robert (IN THE END - I know, he took a while) chose to make his life with Aaron Dingle. To build his future with him. Aaron Dingle who represented everything that Robert had spent so many years running away from. A village greasemonkey, a man who owned up to his crimes (did time for his friends even), someone who enjoyed the small cosy intimacy of village life, someone who had friends, family, but no wealth or status. No power or influence. Robert chose all of that - chose his true self - when he chose Aaron. “I want to be myself now with you.”
Anyway, my OG point is that it goes way beyond just jealousy. The Donnie Era really represented the struggle at Robert’s core. Because Donnie is basically an even more extreme version of Robbo (I know, the fuck is that even possible? But he is). Money grabbing, opportunistic, parasitic, cynical, grasping. And then there was Aaron… Aaron who brought out this other Robert. This soft, sweet, gentle FUNNY Robert. A Robert who cared deeply… Aaron just wanted to be pure and true with him. Revel in their love (they had only just begun in terms of loving eachother). So Robert had a choice to make. And in typical fashion. He made the wrong one. And he regretted it.
Alex is not the same. It’s not comparable. Robert already believes he’s done the worst. He’s lost Aaron. And it’s his fault. And although at first he begs and pleads with Aaron to just keep trying, to give them another shot…
In his chats with Vic while Aaron is away, you can see, he sort of slowly accepts that he can’t go on making Aaron suffer. Course, hope never dies (as he tells Emma) as long as Aaron is out there in the world living his life. But Robert knows how much he’s hurt him. You can see that when he first saw the scars. He also knows that Aaron doesn’t deserve to feel pain like that. So if he’s the cause? He’ll tuck himself away. He won’t call. And when Aaron gets back and tells him to leave, he’ll go. Eventually. He’ll walk away… That’s what he deserves. He’s always known that deep down. He’s not good enough for his Good Man.
Aaron. The Mill. Their life. Their family. Robert accepts being shut out this time. He’s not clinging on when Alex comes on the scene like he was with Donnie. It doesn’t mean he’s not hoping. And that he doesn’t love Aaron. If anything, he loves Aaron more than life itself. Because the most important person in this equation is Aaron, and Aaron’s wellbeing. THAT’S WHY HE LEAVES. Even if it hurts like a bitch.
Don’t get me wrong he’s jealous. More jealous than he’s ever been. And seeing them together is like a knife to the chest.
But Aaron deserves the world on a platter. Robert knows that. He deserves someone good and pure. With a soul that isn’t pitch black. Who will love him and treasure him and protect him from harm. Basically all the things Robert failed to do on that fateful February night with Rebecca. So yes… It’s the most jealous he has ever felt in his life.
But he knows he has no right. Considering how he dealt with Aaron’s jealousy over Rebecca…? He has absolutely no right. So instead of taking it out on Aaron and Alex, the way he did with Chrissie and to a greater extent Donnie, he sort of implodes. Implodes in on himself. The true culprit. You can’t say he has been functioning at his level best since the end of his marriage. And we’re still seeing that now. The unravelling. We’re seeing Robert Sugden break down because he lost Aaron Dingle. He didn’t break this way when he lost Chrissie for good did he? Trace his departure from his senses back, and it’s when he saw Aaron with Alex. That’s when he truly lost it. And embarked on his own epic pain spiral. And Larry shaped plan.
HE’S MALFUNCTIONING NONNIE. HIS INTERNAL WIRING HAS BEEN IRREPARABLY DAMAGED. HE NEEDS A REBOOT. THE DOCTOR KNOCKED HIM FOR SIX. THIS IS ALL ABOUT AARON AND THE END OF THEIR MARRIAGE. ALL OF IT. ITS THE BIGGEST SCHEME HE’S EVER TRIED TO PULL OFF AND ITS JUST ABOUT KILLING HIM. BUT ANYTHING IS BETTER THAN FACING UP TO THE TRUTH THAT AARON MIGHT VERY WELL BE NESTLED IN SOME HOTEL ROOM IN FRANCE WITH ALEX RIGHT NOW.