Went to the Black Lives Matter “march” and didn’t like how they were watering down what the movement is about, didn’t like that is centered the lens of cis het black men.
It had no intersexuality on top of that they tried to make Black Lives, Black Deaths, Black Oppressions into a party. A party. They literally said “ lets turn up.”, and they had music and food. It was a social event. Also their were few black and brown folks there. It was a sea of whiteness. So me and my friend Khadija shut it down. The organizers mostly black men tried to silence us. But other black and brown women said hell no, support us and people started chanting for us to be heard.
Took the mic, and told them Black Lives and Oppressions are not a turn up. Then we went into the different things happening to black people. Such as, over 4,000 black immigrants being deported as we speak. We talked Black undocumented folks and ice raids in our communities.
We talked about Black Trans Women being murdered. We talked about Somalia being classified a war zone during a famine. And Militarized anti blackness as International.
We talked about the black folks in prison. We talked about institutional racism and anti blackness. We talked about Black Muslim women whose hijabis were torn off at protests and then arrested. We talked about the rights of black children.
During our speech, they told me before we got on the “stage” to make sure we toned it down. Then the mic my friend was using to speak was lowered. She said hell nah and told them to give her the other mic.
And start speaking. They didn’t even give us a lot of time before they took the mic from us. While we were speaking they kept trying to take the mic.
This was wild y'all. After they took the mic, they wanted us stay on the stage to be token black Muslim women.
People boo them because they wouldn’t let us speak. And we refused to be silenced. That’s why they gave us the mic.
I’m so happy we shut it down because black folks in the crowd were hella pissed by what was happening. The Black and brown folks who supported us originally and those in the crowd thanked us for speaking up and talking about intersexuality. A black women who is undocumented thank us for talking about undocumented black folks. This is wild y'all. We had to say several times that Black Lives is not a Party. Not a social event.
Y'all they got a warehouse for a “Black Party” after the march. The flyer for the party was of a black boy with his hands up, and it said something about not being let in or allowed in. Yea. Let that sink in.
Stiles is drunk. The party slides around him in washes of color and sound– everything transient, nothing sticking. Bass thumps in his eardrums, turning his stomach. Derek appears as a blessing, half out the door before he even makes it through the foyer, but still the most solid thing Stiles has seen all night.
“I hate this,” Stiles whispers, his breath hot against Derek’s sensitive ear. “You’re the only person here worth talking to.”
“Okay,” Derek says, his hand settling solid and reassuring on Stiles’ hip. “So let’s go somewhere that isn’t here.”
“What were you even doing there?” Stiles peers at Derek curiously over the rim of his mug. The coffee isn’t quite strong enough to dissolve tooth enamel, but coupled with the brisk walk from the rave to the diner, it’s doing wonders for counteracting his buzz. “A warehouse party isn’t really your scene.”
Derek shrugs, placidly plowing his way through a mountain-high portion of chicken souvlaki. His knees keeps knocking against Stiles’ under the chipped Formica tabletop, and Stiles can’t find it in himself to pretend to mind.
“Didn’t really look like your scene, either,” Derek says, meeting Stiles’ gaze unblinkingly. His wackadoo eyes make Stiles’ head spin, and it’s easy to blame it on the booze. Bourbon, Stiles thinks admonishingly. When will you learn that bourbon is not your friend.
“It seemed like a good idea at the time,” he huffs, darting his hand across the table to snatch a few of Derek’s fries, nearly knocking a glass of water over in the process. Derek rolls his eyes heavenward with a sigh, and then rotates his plate so that the truly impressive mound of deep fried potato is facing Stilinskiwards. Stiles bites down on a victorious whoop, and grabs another handful to cram into his mouth.
Derek watches him chew happily, his ridiculous eyebrows drawn together in the expression Stiles has categorized as “exasperated but fond.” It’s much preferred to the look that Stiles used to get, which was better classified as “imminent manslaughter”.
“So, this is nice,” Stiles begins, at the same time Derek sets down his fork and says, “Scott told me about your fight.”
I really enjoyed the moment when Connie takes a moment to compose herself as she’s worried about her mother running late to pick her up. She takes a deep breath before her mother shows up at the house.
It seems “Here Comes a Thought” from Mindful Education has taken effect on Connie’s mindset whenever her anxiety gets the best of her.
Compare that to Alone Together, when it overtakes her (as she’s fused into Stevonnie) during the warehouse rave party, throwing the audience into her mental state.
Character growth, even in the smallest ways, is one reason why I really love the show.
Pairing: Alex Lightwood x Reader Fandom: Shadow Hunters
Author’s Note: Okay so I know it’s been too long and this one isnt that great either but still guys I would really apreciate your feedback so if you can please do leave a comment or two.. :*
“….so where do we have to go for this mission?” Y/N asked as
they made their way towards the weapons room where they are supposed to meet up
with the other two members of this mission Jace and Alec.
“According to the information we’ll be able to track the
warlock who’s been making deals with this nest of vamps for the last 2 months
in the Pandemonium club.” Izzy said while carefully selecting her weapons
finally settling on her signature electrum whip and a pair of daggers.
Y/N nodded her head while picking up her seraph blade along
with her set of shurikens (ninja stars) which she uses like an extension of her
“ By the looks of it, it seems Shuriken girl is tagging
along in this mission as well..” Alec said while making his way over to the
weapon area with an irritated look on his face his parabatai, Jace following
him. “We can use some Shurikens on this mission Alec.” Jace said while tucking
a dagger in his shoe.
Y/N shrugs at her best friend Izzy as she gives her a look
questioning about Alec’s mood. “Hurry up arrow guy pick up your stuff so we can
get moving…” Y/N said getting a little impatient as this was your 1st
official mission in the New York Institute. As you had previously been working
from the Hawaii Institute until out of nowhere The Clave decided to transfer
you to the New York Institute.
Although the transfer at first was a little hard for you as
you had a whole life in Hawaii which you had to leave behind to come to New
York, until you met Izzy and became friends with her and Jace as well. They
made you feel like you were a part of something letting you into their group
without any hesitation, well that is except for their brother Alec who liked to
Everyone was ready to leave when Alec decided to drop a
bomb”She’s not going with us.” Pointing in Y/N’s direction. “WHAT…WHY?!” Y/N
exclaimed in surprise. “Because you are not ready and I don’t want you to screw
up this mission for us it’s too important to be taken lightly.”
“The Hell Alec! I’m not a new recruit! I’ve been doing this
for the past 2 years in Hawaii. Just because I’m transferred here doesn’t mean
I left all my training in Hawaii and have to train again like a rookie…” Y/N
exclaimed getting really irritated by Alec’s bossy claim.
“Y/N! Maryse wants to talk to you. Go meet with her as soon
as your free…..” Robert said while entering the room but trailing off as he
noticed the tension in the room. “Am I interrupting something? ”. “No, father.
We were just leaving. Y/N’s going to go see mother right away.” Alec said while
moving out followed by his parabatai and sister.
“Don’t worry you’re definitely going with us next time and
we’ll break Alec’s nose if he’ll try to stop you.” Izzy whispered to you with a
light wink in Y/N’s direction on her way out of the institute.
As soon as they left me here having nothing to do I decided
to go to Maryse’s room to see what she wanted to talk to me about. Right now
I’m standing outside her door ready to knock wondering what she might want to
talk about. “Come in” she said as soon
as my hand made contact with her door. She looked up at me as soon as I entered
her door and bobbed her head once to acknowledge my presence and gestured
towards the seat in front of her desk. Not to delay any further I sit and wait
for her to talk. “I hope you are settled here Y/N.” was that even a question? I
wondered. “Look Y/N, I’m not going to beat around the bush with you. I heard
that you haven’t attended any mission since your arrival. The Clave sent you
here to help with the missions. So I want you to join the kids on their next
mission. You are a well trained shadow hunter so there’s no need to see you
train again like a rookie, understood?!” “Yes.” I said while in my head there
was so much more that I wanted to say. What’s the use we all know Maryse is a
practical woman and she doesn’t want any stupid excuses. I too am dying to go
on a mission as soon as possible I am sick of sitting in the institute for the
last 2 months. All I want is some real action which is out there and not in here.
“All this seemed way simpler in my head..” Jace said as he
fought of some demons which were making their way towards him. Izzy was trying
to get a grip of the warlock who took of as soon as he saw us shadow hunters
walking into the pandemonium. Now there were non-stop demons coming out of
nowhere and attacking us. I don’t want to admit it but it doesn’t seem like
this mission is going to be accomplished today.
As the number of demons was increasing by the minute we weren’t left
with a choice Jace signaled me that we should leave before we get ourselves
killed, as much as I hate to admit it he was right. We made our way outside the
pandemonium where Izzy was supposed to be but she was nowhere in sight.
I was in the training room when I heard all the commotion
well it’s about time they’re back. I made my way towards the door ready to hear
them boast about how they kicked ass out there that’s when my eyes landed on
Izzy she was held up by her brothers. Her face contoured in pain. She was hurt.
I ran towards her to help them . “ What the hell happened?!” I asked as soon as
I saw how she was withering and moaning in pain but there was no sign of any
injury on her body. “The warlock out some spell on her.” Jace said as he laid
her down on the bed. “It’s the spell that’s causing her pain.” Alec said his
voice laced with worry as he watched his sister suffer. I looked at Izzy and
knew what I had to do, “I’m sorry Izzy.” I said as I hit her lightly on her
accu-points which I was sure would knock her out for some time. “What the hell
did you do to her?” Alec snarled at me as soon as Izzy was out cold. “I knocked
her out without hurting her because I can’t see her in pain. I know someone who
might be able to help.” I said as I left
the room to make a call.
“Man! It’s amazing how she’s recovering so fast usually
these stupid warlocks’ spells wear off in weeks..” Jace said in amazement. “I
like her, she’s definitely going with us on our next mission!” “Do whatever you
want..” I said as I watched my little sister’s peaceful sleeping face.
“Alec…” “You’re awake!” “Y/N?” “Yeah, Hey! It’s okay. How
are you feeling?” “Never better” Izzy said as she tried to get up and I made my
way to her bedside holding out a glass of water for her knowing she might be
thirsty. “Thanks..” Izzy smiled at me as she drank the whole glass in big
gulps. “Hey!” Izzy said as she saw her brothers entering her room to probably
check on her. “Wow! You really are awake!” Jace exclaimed obviously surprised
by the development. “Why? How long was I out?” Izzy asked confused. “Well you
know the warlock casted some spell on you and all. And you do know how long
these spells take to wear off ….” “Was I out cold for a whole week???????!!!!!”
Izzy asked clearly thrown off guard. “No.” Alec deadpanned. “ Shuriken here did
some stuff and you were out for only a day which Jace finds surprising.” Alec
said getting bored with the conversation.
“Well, someone has to get the information out of him and as
far as I know Izzy already tried and failed. No offence Izzy!” “Non taken, in
fact she’s right. Y/N you go we’ll just wait for your signal.” Izzy smiled at
you and threw a sharp glare in Alec’s direction who was mumbling something
under his breath.
Right now we are all standing outside a building which
resembled an old warehouse. According to my information the warlock was going
to attend a party thrown by the famous warlock Magnus Bane inside this
warehouse. And here we are trying to get information from the same warlock who
nearly killed Izzy.
I took the jacket which I was wearing, off and handed it
over to Jace as I made my way inside party-warehouse in my black lace dress
which covered my runes and defined my curves as well. It was a definite
requirement as it was Magnus’ party and he was a fan of fancy.
I could feel some eyes on me as I made my way in and after
greeting Magnus I went over to the bar and found the warlock from whom I needed
the info. I passed a flirty smirk his way as I caught him staring at me. Yes, I
do know how to play my cards. After all I had a lot of time to learn on my
rendezvous with demons and warlocks in Hawaii. “A margarita.” I told the
bartender as soon as he asked. “Put it
on my tab Lizz.” I heard a man say as he ordered himself one as well. I turned
around to come face-to-face with my target. He took the empty seat beside me
and I knew what I had to do.
“Y/N!!!!” Izzy exclaimed as I made my way out of the
warehouse towards them. “We were waiting for your signal! What happened?!” Jace
inquired. “Well, there was no need for the signal….” “I can bet the warlock
wasn’t at the party…” Alec said while cutting me off and I gladly returned the
favor by cutting him off in return “Job went pretty smoothly and I got all the
information out of the warlock over some drinks.” I smirked as I noticed Alec
hold his eye-roll midway. This earned me a “Great!!” along with a high5 from
Jace and a giggle and an appreciative nod from Izzy.
“What is it Izzy??” I asked Izzy while taking a break from training. “Well…?”
Izzy said while giving me a ‘you know what I’m talking about’ look. Of course I
know what she wants from me. She wants me to apologize to Y/N for not trusting
her and for not treating her like she deserves to be treated. I do know that
I’ve been a douche to her since she was introduced to us but I don’t know
something happens to me when she’s nearby. “Alec, when are you ever going to
put your bad boy demeanor off around her? She’s part of the group now and you
can’t just be a douche around her forever. You’ll have to come around someday,
why not sooner than later?!” Izzy stated while she made her way out of the
“Izzy how many times will I have to tell
you that you don’t have to knock on my door before coming in…” I trailed off as
my eyes land on the last person I expected. “It’s me, Alec. Can I come in?” he
asked while peeking his head in my room through the half open door. “Come in!”
I said, though it did surprise me a lot but it would be rude of me to send him
away from my door. “I um…I…” take a seat I said cutting his ramble off. “ Is
everything okay?” I asked while placing a stool to sit on, in front of my bed
where he sat. He looked at me like I had a horn on my head “Yeah, um yes. Fine,
everything is fine… No! no it’s not fine that’s what I’m here to talk about.”
God! Not again! This
was a bad idea I shouldn’t have listen to Izzy… What if I mess up she’s going
to think I’m a fool and STOP!! Stop Alec seriously get a grip on yourself.
She’s looking at you… Oh she’s saying something. Fuck! She’s talking to you.
Focus!!!! “Huh?” I said because my
inner monologue made me miss what she was saying.. “See, that’s exactly what I
mean.” “What do you mean?” What the hell! Have I messed up without eve saying a
thing? “Alec. You need to rest whatever you want to talk about can wait.” She
said holding my shoulders. “No! it can’t wait. Because until I get it off my
chest I won’t be able to rest let alone sleep. Look I um.. I’m sorry for how I
behaved I didn’t mean to be mean I just …” “You just what?” she asked. I placed
my hands on her shoulders getting closer to her and fortunately for me she
didn’t push me back neither did she flip…
“I like you.” There I’ve said it.
“Yeah I thought you were just an ass at first but then I
talked to Izzy and she told me..” she said smiling. Man! She has such a pretty
smile. “I’m glad you finally worked up the courage to tell me though. Now are
you going to kiss me or will Izzy have to give you a little push for that as
in maryland, they stop at a 24-hour diner in baltimore and a bunch of
rowdy looking street punks crash their table to invite them to a
warehouse party that johns hopkins students are throwing just a little past the
notorious art kid-filled copycat building. henry is practically falling asleep in the
booth but mention of a skate ramp and bonfire and a dancefloor wake him
right up and they agree to go because why the hell not – and it’s
everything they were promised and more. gansey gets drunk and kisses a
frat boy who looks a whole lot like declan lynch while henry and blue
dance with the same girl between both of their bodies (her name is
mikaela and she’s a printmaking major but what really matters is that
she’s warm and giggly and more than happy to be in the middle of a
in pennsylvania, they drive through expansive rural farmlands that are
lush and green and the air smells sweet and crisp. they stay in an old
colonial-style cottage that’s said to be haunted and stay awake all
night pretending to film their own spoof episode of ghosthunters. the
only problem is that blue actually can kind of feel something
even though she can’t see anything, and henry is freaked out of his
mind at the thought; gansey pretends it’s noah and proceeds on as usual.
they end up with some entirely hilarious voice recordings of henry
admitting that he’s actually highkey scared of old haunted houses while
blue tries to sound way more chill than she actually feels and gansey
rambles on about electromagnetic fields and energies.
in nebraska, they roll through omaha and stay at an airbnb owned by a
kid named ricky with bright hazel eyes and a cute crooked smile who has a
huge map of the US on his wall filled with pins of roadtrips he’s taken
in the past. he tells them all about the one that he’s planning up to
canada henry is beyond thrilled to geek out about vancouver a bit. they
buy a bottle of patron from the liquor store across from ricky’s house
for only $14 (gansey is blown away by how cheap it is to buy liquor
here?!) and make margaritas and drink them in an inflatable pool in
ricky’s yard. the room they sleep in has blankets draped from the
ceiling and christmas lights strung around the walls and a nintendo 64
in the corner with a tupperware bin full of games. they play mario party
2 until it’s nearly one in the morning before all passing out in a pile
on the queen-size mattress that takes up most of the floor.
in colorado, they stop at a strange little cantina nestled in the mountains that has the best salsa blue has ever tasted and real cowboys sit in the booth opposite theirs. blue spends the entire meal trying to eavesdrop on them while gansey gives henry a thorough history of how cantinas came to be. henry steals more than a few sips of the beer gansey ordered with a fake i.d. that ronan dreamt him up and may or may not get quite buzzed when gansey orders a glass of over-proof bourbon for him; blue watches amusedly as henry gets increasingly more handsy and affectionate with gansey. by the time they finish eating and get back in the car, blue’s stuck driving because henry insists that he and gansey have to snuggle in the backseat, they just have to, okay?
in utah, they spend a few days in the uinta national forest to camp and
explore a bit. while searching for a good place to pitch their tent and
build a fire, they come across a group of train hopping kids who’ve been
camping near a little creek. blue is instant friends with a girl who
introduces herself as cosma; they start weaving little crowns from the
long strands of grass and weeds while chatting about the stars. gansey
strikes up an intellectual conversation with this stoned kid named
sequoia and impresses him with tales of welsh kings. henry plops down
besides a girl who’s doodling flowers and britney spears lyrics into a
beat-up sketchbook. she calls herself sprout; henry proceeds to call her
lentil and alfalfa and every type of sprout he can think of and she
laughs and laughs and laughs. they all build a fire together that night and smoke a little weed while sitting around it - they toast marshmellows over the fire and talk about love and blue braids cosma’s hair and they all howl like wolves at the night sky and sing silly songs to the moon til the sun paints the morning sky a dusty pink.
“So, what do you think of this so far?” he asked with a grin as he looked around, “I mean I wish I could figure out how who’s throwing it, but they’ve definitely done a good job of setting this place up for a party.”
Watching both her ex-fling and her one night stand pair up together for a round of truth and dare was enough to send Victoria fleeing towards the refreshment table. “I don’t think there’s enough alcohol here to make this night bearable,” she huffed as someone joined her by the table, the brunette pouring herself another glass of alcohol.
It was a cold winter night when he had found himself outside her window. Snow covered the fire escape and his neck was sweating from the scarf around it, but he didn’t mind. Both hands were busy holding bags full of baking ingredients, so he used his knee to tap the glass. Moments passed with no answer, so he placed the bags in the snow reluctantly and used his knuckles. Three knocks to the window and a few seconds later, she was standing in front of him looking more beautiful than the snow covered trees in Central Park.
“What are you doing here?” She asked while putting a diamond earring in. Her lips were painted more red than usual and her eyes were bluer than the ocean. He had seen Maya dress up before, but he couldn’t help but stare in awe.
“I brought some stuff,” he muttered after too long. He reached behind him for his bags and showed them to her with a grin. “Figured we could bake cookies and decorate them for the New Years party tomorrow!”
A smile settled on her lips, but it wasn’t enough to show the dimple that he had grown oh so fond of, nor did it reach her eyes. “That’s sweet Huckleberry, but I’ve got plans tonight.”
His heart sank, but he supposed he should have guessed that by the pretty black dress that she was wearing. He couldn’t help but notice how it hugged her in all the right places and was just long enough to leave a little bit to the imagination.
“I’m going out with Josh,” she smiled after he took too long to speak. This time, the smile showed brightly in her eyes.
“On a date?”
She rolled her eyes and turned away from him to continue getting ready. He stayed outside of her room, the snow picking up behind him. “Yes, Lucas. I’m going on a date.”
He was glad she had turned away so that she couldn’t see his frown. He knew she had always had a thing for Josh, but since when was it reciprocated? Just a week ago at the Matthew’s annual Christmas party he had been sucking some other girl’s face. Why did he decide he wanted her now?
“Would you shut the window?” She called over her shoulder. “Its cold out there and I don’t feel like dying of hypothermia before I even go out tonight.”
Lucas felt as if his heart had just been stomped on, but he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “Have fun tonight, Maya. And be careful.”
It was a cold night when she opened her door to see Josh on the other side of it. His hair was gelled back and his brown eyes reflected a mischievous look that she knew could be found in hers as well. Her heels were high, so she found herself to be almost eye level with him, something that she wasn’t used to.
“Miss Hart,” he bowed in front of her. “You are looking lovely this evening.”
She laughed softly and grabbed the ends of her shawl since her dress was too tight to curtsy with. “Why thank you Mr. Matthews. You are looking quite dapper yourself.”
He cringed at the way she said “Mr. Matthews” and she felt her own nose wrinkle. “Mr. Matthews is my brother,” he chuckled. “Are you ready to go?”
She nodded and accepted his hand as they left her apartment. This was the night she had been waiting for ever since she was ten. Even then, when he was an awkward teenager just hitting puberty, she had hoped to walk with him hand in hand someday. She wasn’t sure what had made him change his mind about her, but she was not stupid enough to question a miracle. Perhaps the difference between seventeen and twenty was less drastic than all of the other years. No matter the reason, she was grateful that he had finally looked at her the way she did at him.
It was New Years Eve and they were at the Matthews house for their party. Maya was wearing a sparkly red dress and Lucas couldn’t take his eyes off of her no matter how hard he tried. Zay nudged him a few times, telling him that he was being far too obvious, but Lucas didn’t care. She was beautiful and she was draped all over him like they had been in love for years despite the fact that they had only been on a single date which happened to have been the night before. Josh was a nice guy and Lucas wanted to like him, but there was always something preventing their friendship. Even when Josh looked at Maya as Riley’s little friend, Lucas got a bad vibe from him. Everyone told him that he was being silly and that Josh was a Matthews so he had to be a nice guy, but Lucas wasn’t convinced of it.
When she met Lucas’s eyes from across the room, she gave him a small wave before returning to her conversation with Josh and a classmate. It burned a little to be blown off so easily, but he swallowed the pain and took another swig from his flask of whiskey. Farkle had scolded him, telling him that if any of the adults saw him that he would be kicked out, but Lucas only laughed in response. Let them, he thought. It would be better than this self inflicted torture of watching her with him.
The countdown began and he found himself still staring at them across the room. Everyone around him was yelling out the numbers with the tv, but they were whispering giddily to each other. At seven he was leaning down to say something into her ear. At six she was laughing and covering her mouth with joy. At five he was pulling her hand away and bringing it to his shoulder. At three she was looking at him as though he put the stars in the sky. At one their lips were connected and he was holding her waist as she wrapped her arms around his neck.
“Happy New Year!”
The phrase echoed through his brain as he watched the two of them kissing in a way that made his stomach ache and his throat itch. He felt the urge to punch something, but a hand found itself on his shoulder before he could.
“Breathe,” Zay instructed. And Lucas tried, he really did. Zay saw the fire in his eyes still burning and decided they should leave before he did something.
It was Valentine’s Day and she found herself gagging at the couples in the hallway being way too affectionate for her liking. There was a fundraiser for the basketball team where people bought roses to send to their significant others and her female classmates were taking it way too seriously if you asked her.
“It’s because your boyfriend is in college,” Missy told her while shoving the dozen or so roses she had received into her locker. “You already win at life, there is no need for you to worry about trivial high school roses.”
“Maybe,” she sighed. Josh was at college a lot and didn’t always have time for her childish requests such as going on a Valentine’s date. She had texted him that morning to wish him a happy birthday as well as Valentine’s Day, but she never received a response.
“Hey Shortstack,” Lucas called from a few feet away.
She turned and looked up at him walking towards her with a rose in his hand and a lazy grin on his face. He held the flower out to her and she took it cautiously. “You got me one?” She asked carefully and curiously.
“Yeah,” he shrugged. She could tell he was feeling awkward by the way he scratched the back of his neck. “You seemed a little bummed that you didn’t get one in home room so I thought I would get you one.”
She smiled at him and hugged him tightly. She heard a slight gasp of surprise escape him which made her laugh. “Thanks Lucas.”
It was April when Lucas found himself grinding on some sophomore at an empty warehouse party. He had drank quite a bit and her skirt was pretty short and he’s a hormonal teenage boy so what was he expected to do? Just because he was in love with a girl who didn’t seem to bat an eye at him anymore didn’t mean he couldn’t have a few random hookups. The girl had a nice ass and she was short and blonde, not that he was comparing her to Maya. But if he was, Maya’s hair was much prettier than this girls because Maya’s hair was the color of sunshine and fell around her like a halo and this girl’s was too yellow and clearly unnatural. Maya had any nicer ass too.
He looked across the room to find the girl who he wished he was dancing with only to be annoyed when he found her. She was talking on her phone and she appeared to be upset by whatever the other person was saying. It didn’t take Farkle’s intelligence to figure out that it was Josh on the other line. He watched as she threw her free hand up in frustration and made her way to one of the exits. He knew he shouldn’t go after her and he more importantly shouldn’t even care, but he couldn’t help it. The sophomore grabbed his neck and pulled him down to kiss him, but he couldn’t find it in him to lead this poor girl on. He apologized halfheartedly to the girl before hustling over to where he had last seen Maya.
When he found her outside, she was looking up at the sky and holding herself tightly. The door slammed behind him, startling her, but she relaxed when she saw it was him.
“What are you doing here?” She asked after turning back to the sky. “Shouldn’t you be in the bathroom hooking up with that girl I saw you dancing with?”
He was a bit taken aback by the fact that she had noticed, but recovered quickly. “I could ask you the same question.”
She smirked at him and shook her head. “I’m more into brunettes. She’s not really my type.”
He rolled his eyes and stood next to her, holding onto the railing protecting them from plummeting to the city street. “I mean, what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be at a college party with your boyfriend instead of a high school one?”
She scoffed at the word “boyfriend” and he couldn’t help but feel a tinge of hope. “Josh is off at a study session with his tutor. Apparently calculus gets even harder in college.” He tried to laugh, but it sounded more like a choking noise. “He’s not really okay with me being here either.”
He tightened his grip on the railing and looked at her. “What do you mean? Why does he care?”
She sighed and looked back at him. “He thinks that high school parties are dumb and that all people do at them is get trashed and hook up. He’s mad that I even want to be here and he thinks I’m being immature.”
He rolled his eyes at the older boy’s stupidity. “But it’s okay when he goes to college parties? Where there are even more people and more booze and more places to hook up? How does that make sense?”
“Beats me,” she sighed. “He doesn’t realize that I have friends who I like to talk to. Friends like Riley and Missy and Zay and you and Farkle and Billy and everyone else in our fucking school.” It stung a bit when she grouped him with their other friends, but he knew that was all he was to her. “Its just exhausting having to try and explain it over and over again.”
He nodded and wrapped an arm around her shoulder comfortingly and she instinctively rested her head against his chest. “I’m here for you. I always will be.”
A week later she came into school beaming and told everyone that he had said the three magic words the night before and Lucas was left wondering how she could forgive him so easily.
It was a Saturday and loneliness was aching in her bones. She sat in the bath tub, letting the freezing water run over her feet. It had been hours since she decided to try and wash away his touch, but somehow she still felt it seeping into her pores. Her arms were raw and her hands had bled, but it wasn’t enough to be free of him.
He had promised her forever. He promised he would always stay and she stupidly believed him. His words were venomous but she was convinced that his kiss was the antidote. She let herself believe that he loved her because it was what she craved more than anything. She convinced herself that he was the sun, and perhaps she was right. What she failed to remember, however, is that the sun can burn and staring at it to long will blind you.
He told her he loved her and if this is what love felt like then she could never wish it upon her worst enemy. She had given him every part of her, mind and body, and he had let her, knowing that he would leave her in the dust. He was all she had ever wanted for as long as she could remember and now his scent made her sick and burned her throat as she gasped for air. He had planted himself deep within her lungs and now he was suffocating her. No matter how loud she screamed, no one could hear.
It was a Saturday and his fists were cut and his knuckles bleeding. The stone wall of the fireplace in his basement showed no sign of the beating it had just received, but his hands did. How could he do this to her? How could someone who called himself a man ever be such a coward? He had watched them together, selfishly wishing it was him for months, but it turned out he was right about the boy all that time.
Riley had called him because Maya couldn’t bare to. Riley told him that if she had called, Maya knew he would try and find Josh and end up killing him. She was right. He still wanted to and the thought remained in his brain even now, but he knew she would never forgive him. Riley told him how her uncle had been using Maya as somewhat of a rebound and Lucas didn’t hear anything she said after that. Something about Maya walking in on him with his ex. Lucas couldn’t process any of what Riley was saying because his blood was pounding in his ears and he was actually seeing red. Josh had told her he loved her, how could he treat her like this? Josh was all Maya ever wanted and he abused that and took advantage of her. With the already fragile outlook she had on love, he used her as a pawn.
He had tried calling her about thirty times already, but she never answered. He paced his basement in a fit of fury and contemplated finding Josh again. She may never forgive him, but the world sure would be a better place without that scum bag. Without another thought, he picked up his keys and headed to his car.
She’s not sure when she finally got out of the bath, but she was somehow on her bathroom floor now in an old tank top and shorts. Her heart still ached and her lungs were on fire as she gasped for air in between sobs. She gave him everything she had and it still wasn’t enough.
“Maya,” a familiar voice called from her bedroom. “Maya, where are you?”
She didn’t answer because quite frankly, she couldn’t. He must have followed the sound of her cries because before she knew it, Lucas was holding her in his arms and whispering that he was there for her.
“Maya, why are your arms all cut up?” He held her at a distance and examined her torn skin. “Please tell me you didn’t!”
She shook her head furiously and sobbed even louder. “Had to…. Still felt him…….. Wash away.”
His face contorted into a scowl and she knew somehow he understood what she was trying to say. She hadn’t told him when she had slept with Josh, but she was sure he could guess that it had happened.
She grabbed for his hand and he winced. She looked down and saw his bloodied knuckles before returning her gaze to his in horror. “Lucas!” She yelled. “No!”
It was his turn to shake his head. “I picked a fight with the fireplace and it won.” She didn’t quite believe him and he could definitely tell. “I know you would never forgive me, Maya. He deserves to feel some pain, but I won’t do that to you.”
Lucas was right, he did deserve to feel some pain, but she also knew that she didn’t want him to get hurt. Despite the fact that he had just broke her heart, she couldn’t bring herself to wish him harm. If she were completely honest, she was more mad at herself for letting him do this to her than she was at him for doing it.
Lucas broke her out of her self deprecating thoughts by lifting her into his arms and retreating into her room. He picked her up as if she were a small child and to be honest, she kind of felt like one right now. He laid her down on her bed and followed right behind her, holding her tightly and stroking her hair. “I’ve got you, Maya. I always do.”
It was May and prom was just around the corner, which meant he was working up the nerve to ask her. They had been hanging out more than usual (if that was even possible) since the whole Josh Incident and they had basically become attached at the hip. No one had asked her yet because he had made sure that all of the guys knew that she was strictly off limits, but he still felt nervous to ask her.
They were walking together to lunch and she was wearing that blue dress that made her eyes stand out with a belt around her waist and he knew he had picked the right day to finally do it. She was probably going to kill him for this, but it would totally be worth it. They reached their usual table where the rest of their friends were waiting and Zay looked at him with a knowing grin.
On cue, the school choir stood up and began to sing her favorite song. Maya looked over, a bit confused but also amused. A moment later, the band kids joined in with their instruments on the other side of the cafeteria and her head shot to them. The dance team was next, heading to the direct center of the room and dancing to the music. The football team came out with a banner with Maya’s name written on it in pretty writing done by Riley. He looked at her and saw her face turn bright red as everyone stared at her, waiting for what was coming next. Five guys from the baseball team followed, each holding a letter or question mark to spell out “Prom?” Farkle quickly handed the bouquet of roses to Lucas and nodded encouragingly. Gasps came from multiple girls and hollers of approval from guys when they realized what was happening. Lucas stood up from his seat next to her and knelt on one knee before her, holding the flowers out to her. She looked like a tomato she was blushing so hard and he couldn’t help but laugh at her.
He held up his hand and the music and dancers stopped, making sure that everyone could hear him. “Maya Penelope Hart.” He earned a glare at the use of her full name, but he ignored her. “Would you do me the great honor of accompanying me to prom?”
Two banners fell from the second floor with each answer written on them. Maya looked in shock and he waited anxiously for her answer. “You are such a dork,” she laughed, accepting the bouquet. She looked at everyone who was holding their breath awaiting her answer. “Yes, Lucas. I will be your date to prom.”
Cheers erupted from the entire school and Lucas felt like he had just won at life. Maya Hart was going to be his date to their prom. What more could he ask for in life? She yanked him off of his knee by his collar and pulled him into a tight hug. He heard her mutter something into his shoulder, but he couldn’t make out what she said. Lucas Friar was going to prom with Maya Hart and that was all that mattered.
It was halfway through prom and Maya was dancing with Riley to some horribly bubblegum pop song that she would never listen to if it wasn’t at a dance. Lucas had gone to pick her up to take her for pictures at Farkle’s house about an hour before the event started, and when she opened the apartment door he was too busy staring at her like a huckleberry to say a word.
“Thanks, Sundance,” she laughed before pulling him inside. “You look great too!”
He shook his head and began rambling about how amazing she looked before they were cut off by Shawn. He pulled Lucas aside for a “man to man” talk and she couldn’t help but role her eyes at the man’s overprotectiveness.
Since they had gotten to the dance itself, Lucas had seemed to be just as nervous as he was when she opened the door. He wasn’t much fun when he was nervous, so she may or may not have spiked his punch a little. He didn’t seem to notice luckily, but he was beginning to loosen up so it seemed like it was working. She looked over to see him at their table, arguing with Zay over something. The horrible song turned into a much slower one and she watched as his face went pale. This was the first slow song of the night surprisingly, and he seemed to be dreading it. His eyes found hers as she began to walk toward him at the table and he took a giant sip of his drink to avoid any further eye contact.
“Get up loser,” she instructed when she reached him. “We are dancing.”
He set his drink down and looked at her hesitantly. “Are you sure? I think I actually have to pee so how about the next one?”
She grabbed his ear as he tried to walk away and led him out to the dance floor. “If you didn’t want to dance with me, then why did you bother asking me here in the first place?”
His eyes widened and he shook his head. “It’s not that I don’t want to dance with you! Trust me, I really really want to dance with you Maya.”
“Then why are you avoiding me?” She rested her arms around his neck and looked at him questioningly.
He looked down and she swore she saw him blush. “I just… I don’t know how to dance. Not like this at least.”
She tried to bite away her smile, but by the look on his face she knew she failed. “It’s easy, I promise. Here.” She took his hands and set them on her waist. “Now all we do is sway slowly and avoid stepping on each other’s feet.” He nodded and looked down, trying to make sure he didn’t squish her feet. “No,” she scolded, lifting his chin so that their eyes met again. “You have to look me in the eye. Trust yourself.”
“I don’t,” he murmured so quietly that if she hadn’t seen his lips move she wouldn’t have known he had spoken at all. After a few moments of silence and concentration, he spoke again. “I’m sorry about earlier. I wanted to tell you how beautiful you look, but I couldn’t find the words.”
She laughed. “Well thank you. I must say, you do look decent in a tux.”
“Just decent?” He teased. She wanted to tell him that he looked very handsome, but she couldn’t bring herself to. She might ruin things if she did, and she did not want to ruin this. Dancing there with Lucas was the first time she had felt the light behind her eyes switch on again in a long time and she couldn’t risk ruining it. Instead of answering, she looked around at the other dates dancing.
“Riley and Farkle look like they’re trying to swallow each other’s faces,” she chuckled. He followed her gaze and joined her. “He’s going to ruin her makeup that I worked so hard on.”
“I’m pretty sure if he wasn’t ruining it now he would still be messing it up pretty badly later,” he smirked. “You know they’re going to end up in a closet or a bathroom at Billy’s later.”
She snorted and his smile grew wider. “That’s true. I’m just glad Mr. Matthews wasn’t allowed to chaperone. Riley would be home in Amish clothes if he saw the two of them right now.”
The music changed again, but neither of them noticed. They were in their own little bubble and it wasn’t until Zay tapped Maya’s shoulder that they returned to reality.
“Sorry Lucas,” he apologized insincerely. “I’m stealing your date to dance with.”
Lucas frowned and she was sure she heard him growl, but Zay was yanking her away before she could even say goodbye. “What was that?” She laughed when they were a good distance away.
“I couldn’t let him hog you all to himself,” Zay smirked.
Maya felt herself frown a bit. “I am his date. He kinda gets to hog me if he wants me.”
This made Zay’s smile grow even wider. “Oh trust me sugar, he wants you. I’m just showing him how much.”
Before Maya could ask what the hell he was talking about, Lucas was back and handing Maya a glass of the spiked punch from their table. “You haven’t had anything to drink in a while,” he pointed out. “Why don’t you come back to the table and rest for a bit. I’m sure your feet are killing you.”
It was at Billy’s house that Lucas found himself sitting on a couch with Maya on his lap and a red solo cup in each of their hands. His senses and reflexes were slowed from the spiked punch that Maya thought she was sneaking him and he was using it as a total excuse to be as affectionate with her as he wanted. Since arriving at the after party, he and Maya had both drank their fair share of beer and vodka, so it was no wonder that she was acting so giddy. Riley and Farkle had disappeared almost an hour ago as was expected and Zay was no where to be seen, so it was just Lucas, Maya, and a bunch of their classmates.
“I need another drink,” Maya had said, standing up rather wobbly off of Lucas.
He caught her before she tumbled onto Sarah and pulled her back beside him. “I’ll get it for you.” He was much sturdier on his feet because of the lack of five inch heels and he didn’t want her to fall and break something.
She beamed at him. “You’re the best Lucas.” He tried really hard not to let that go to his head, but he failed miserably.
The kitchen was empty when he got there and poured her a tiny bit of vodka and filled the rest with orange juice. When he returned to where he had left her, she was gone. “Where’d she go?” He asked Yogi.
“She went upstairs. Said to have you follow her.”
Lucas thanked him before heading up with her drink in hand. Billy yelled something about making sure to lock the door behind him, but Lucas ignored him and flashed him the finger. He found her in the guest bedroom sitting on the windowsill.
“You know that’s not a bay window, right?” He taunted. “It’s not as easy to sit in.”
“Are you saying I have a big ass?” Maya accused playfully, accepting the drink from him.
“I plead the fifth.” She was smiling so brightly and the streetlights from the window behind her were making her look ethereal and it took everything in him not to take her face and kiss it. “Why’d you come up here?”
She shrugged and took a big swig from the cup. “Things were getting loud down there and I wanted some alone time with you.”
He blinked a few times, trying to determine if this was some drunken fantasy or if it was actually happening. When she looked at him expectingly, he laughed. “Why do you want to be alone with me?”
Her eyes became hooded and her smirk was taunting him. “Why do I need a motive? You are my date after all.”
He scratched his neck nervously and sat on the bed across from her. “Yeah, I suppose.”
She set the drink down next to her on the windowsill and stood in front of him. She placed her hands on his shoulders and looked at him while biting her bottom lip. “Besides, I really want to see what the tie looks like around my wrists instead of your neck.”
He gulped loudly and before he knew it she was straddling his lap and her lips were on his. He reacted automatically, his hands finding her hips and his lips moving hungrily with hers. She bit his bottom lip, drawing the tiniest bit of blood and he felt what little was left of his control slipping. It wasn’t until he tasted the vodka on her tongue that he realized what was happening. He pushed her shoulders away carefully and broke the kiss. “Maya, stop.” It was very halfhearted and she knew it, so she ignored him and let her hands roam his hair. Her grip was tight and his will power was weak, especially when she tugged his roots. She moved her hips against his and this time, he lifted her off of him completely. “Maya, stop it.”
She looked at him with a hurt expression and her swollen lips in a frown. It was almost enough to make him forget about the fact that she was piss drunk and didn’t know what she was doing. It was almost enough to convince him that this wouldn’t be as wrong as it was and that clearly she wanted this as much as he did. Almost.
“You’re drunk and so am I and this isn’t a good idea,” he forced himself to say. He knew he was doing the right thing, so why did he feel his heart breaking?
Her hurt expression turned to a neutral one and she stood up quickly. “You’re right. I’m going to go get a ride home with Darby.”
He tried to stop her, but she was gone before he could.
It was a week after prom and Maya still felt like an idiot. How could she think that Lucas would want her that way? Just because he had asked her to prom in such a grand way didn’t mean that he felt the same way as her. She should have known when he didn’t want to dance with her that they didn’t see each other the same way. Things had been weird when they saw each other Monday and they were still weird now. He kept trying to talk to her, but she refused to acknowledge what had happened. He had told her that they were both drunk, but he didn’t realize that she knew exactly what she was doing. She pretended to have no recollection of the event, but he refused to let it go. Riley kept asking what was wrong, but she refused to admit her humiliation. She had ruined everything between her and Lucas, but maybe if she ignored it long enough it would go away.
It was June and thing were still weird between them, but at least she was talking to him again. He had realized that she didn’t want to speak about the incident, so he figured she was mortified that even for a moment in her alcohol induced haze she had wanted him. It hurt to know that she didn’t feel the same, but he knew that he did the right thing that night. He couldn’t let her do something that she would regret. People had noticed that things were off between them, and they were too nosy to mind their own business.
“What’s the matter with you two?” Missy asked one day at lunch. Lucas looked to Maya and if looks could kill Missy would have been dead and Maya in jail for murder.
“Nothing’s wrong, Missy,” she growled. “Drop it.”
“No,” Riley fought. “The two of you have been acting icy towards each other since prom and I want to know what happened too.”
“I think all of us do,” Zay chimed in. This time it was Lucas’s turn to glare.
“We are fine,” he insisted. “Right Maya?”
She looked at him and he saw her lip tremble the slightest bit. “Yeah. We are fine.”
“Thats bullshit,” Farkle huffed. “When Riley and I left you, you were both happy as could be.”
“Yeah,” Billy joined the conversation. “You were fine when you went upstairs, but then Maya came running down and made Darby bring her home. I had warned her that she shouldn’t drive because Darby had drank quite a few, but then you were gone Maya.”
Lucas felt his fists ball up and he turned to the blonde next to him. “You let Darby drive you home drunk? What the fuck Maya?”
She glared at him fiercely. “Well I sure as hell wasn’t going home with you after what happened, now was I?”
“And why not?” He boomed back. “I told you to wait and you stormed off without me! You know better than to get in the car with a drunk driver!”
“Why the hell would I have waited, Lucas? To hear you reject me again? I don’t think so!”
“I wasn’t rejecting you, I was stopping you from making a decision you were going to regret!”
“Oh, so now you know what I will and will not regret? You know what’s best for me, do you?”
“You were drunk, Maya! You weren’t thinking straight and I didn’t want you to do something you didn’t think about the consequences of!”
“I thought about the consequences you fuckhead! I thought about them for years and when I finally got up the courage to act on my feelings, you shot me down! You pushed me away and let me look like an idiot. I knew what I was doing Lucas, and I knew what would happen if I did it!”
Lucas sat in silence and just stared at her. She had thought about him for years? She had feelings for him? He was trying desperately to process the words that she had just yelled, but his brain wasn’t working fast enough and his heart was too used to the ache that it couldn’t accept anything else.
“Great,” she huffed. “Now the entire school just heard me saying I want you and the best you can do is sit there and look at me with that dumb look on your face. This is just great.”
He didn’t let himself think this time. He didn’t care about the consequences and he didn’t care who saw, he just knew that he needed to kiss her. He stood up and pulled her with him before leaning down to capture her lips with his. She tensed in surprise before relaxing and responding to his movements. He held her tightly, as if she would disappear if he let her go. A loud roar erupted from their peers and even a few teachers, but they were in their own little world consisting of just the two of them. It felt like both only seconds and many hours before he had to pull away to breathe again and he was met with her hooded lids and swollen lips for the second time in his life.
“It’s about time, Huckleberry,” she whispered so that only he could hear.
“I’ve been wanting to do that for quite a few years now.”
“Actually.. Take me to 477 Sunnyside blvd, Port-a-party mini warehouse please,” Said Tove “okay missy,” Said the taxi driver he drove all the way to the other side of town “Okay missy we’re here at your destination,” Said the taxi driver “Okay!” Said, Tove as she passes over cheque “Have a tip you deserve it” She smilled and got out of the car.
Miami is just really
fun whenever I go there. It’s like this post-apocalyptic Barbie world:
everything is pink, and there’re palm trees everywhere. But then there
are also all these people in crazy sunglasses, warehouses with sick
parties where all the girls are covered in spikes and black leather.
It’s a very weird place. - Grimes
Hi sorry if I bothered you but i was just wondering if the album is gonna come to our houses on the 12 of may worldwide or noone knows until it arrives?
the album will be available to download and stream on itunes/spotify/apple music etc on may 12th
any physical copies you’ve pre-ordered should arrive on may 12th too as stated by harry’s website here:
“Our aim is that pre-order items will be shipped to reach you on the official release date.
Please note that release dates are liable to change at any time due to unforeseen circumstances (most often delays in the product being delivered to our warehouse due to third party manufacturing or shipping delays) - we will post any new release dates onto our site as soon as they are available.”
so you can expect everything to be there for may 12th and if not it’ll always be available online to download/stream! my guess is they’ll send out the pre-orders on may 11th as all shipping is first class