Clay Jensen One Shot
Hey it’s Clay. Clay Jensen. Don’t adjust your… whatever media you’re reading this on. It’s me, alive and ready. Ready to tell you the story of how I met [your full name]. But let’s start at the beginning, when she first walked into Liberty High. After all, every story has an origin.
Second week into school and I noticed from my locker that everyone was staring at the entrance door. I tilted my head to see what they were all staring at and there she was. Her hair was all wet which I presumed was from the rain. She didn’t acknowledge the stares as she approached Hannah’s locker. Suddenly I got a sense of déjà vu. My heart skipped a beat and my grip on my lock tightened. Well wasn’t the whole situation ironic. I caught a quick glimpse of her and I couldn’t help to think, was this revenge for everything I had done, more so hadn’t done for Hannah? Was this some kind of punishment to just remind me of my failure? I loosened my grip and took in a deep breath. I looked back and caught her staring at me. I closed my locker door and averted my eyes away from her. I wasn’t going to make the same mistake twice. Of course we had a couple of classes together, and I found out her name was [y/n], but I kept my distance. Little did I know, I was eventually going to fall into the trap.
A couple weeks had gone by, and it was raining so much that one couldn’t see where they were headed. I was riding my bike back home and found myself plugged in with my headphones. I wasn’t paying much attention to my surroundings. I couldn’t hear the loud honk of the car. It’s beaming lights blinded me causing me to hit the sidewalk and hurt myself badly. I pivoted my body to the side to cause less damage. Unfortunately, I felt warm blood slowly trickling down the right side of my head. I touched my forehead and cussed. I looked up and saw [y/n] rushing towards me. I was relieved to see she didn’t look so worried so the damage couldn’t been so bad. Even if she seemed calm, her eyes were saying something else.
◆ ◆ ◆
Looking out the window and I just saw it happen so fast. Clay flew from his bike straight to the pavement. The moment he fell the car just drove off. Asshole. I ran out and went to see him. I bend and grabbed his shoulder.
You: “Hey are you…” *looks at his head wound* “Wow that looks bad, umm come inside, I’m sure I can find something…”
Clay: *lifts himself up* “I’m fine, I can go home.”
You: *irritated* “I’m not going to hurt you Clay. Come on, let’s go inside.”
I led him towards the front porch and though the door. I brought him upstairs to my room and told him to stay there while I fetched the first aid kit. I came back to the room and saw him awkwardly standing.
You: “You can sit you know.”
Clay: *hesitates* “Oh um yeah.”
He sat down and I wiggled myself beside him. I opened the kit to see if there would be anything useful. I opened a disinfectant pad and cleaned the trickling blood. Once I finished that, I took a second one and warned him.
You: “This is going to hurt.”
I pressed the pad on his forehead where the injury was and felt him wince, and he cursed under his breath. As I padded the wound, I finally got to look at him in his eyes. Never had I seen him stare at me so intently, and so I was intrigued.
You: *while padding down* “I can’t believe an accident is all it took to finally meet you.”
Clay: *tilts his head* “I’m not a conversationalist, or good with people.”
You: *chuckles* “That makes two of us.”
I never spoke to her, not once. Now here I was getting nursed by her, what were the odds of that? Was this the world’s twisted way of giving me karma? Would this just end as bad as the last time? I let these thoughts run all over my mind as I stared at her. I looked at her as she finished padding down. I could see why people at school made such a big fuss about her. There was no denying that she was an attractive girl. She then searched for a band-aid, and when she found one, she started undoing it.
Clay: *raises eyebrows* “You? You’re not good with people?“
You: *smiles* “I prefer no contact. Just a few exceptions.”
Clay: *grins* “I don’t believe you.”
You: *patches him up* “It’s true. And look, you’re all good. I’d still go to see someone who actually knows what they’re doing.”
Clay: “Yeah sure, sounds good.”
You: “Don’t hurt yourself again, alright?”
Clay: *gets off from bed* “Ok. Well I should probably be on my way home.”
You: *get’s up* “You can, but you’re more than welcomed to stay.”
Her voice was soothing, and I couldn’t help to hear the hopefulness in her voice. Why was she acting this way around me? I felt my cheeks warm up a little and turned my head around quickly so she wouldn’t notice.
Clay: “Um my parents will probably start worrying about me, so I’ll just head out.”
You: *as he walks away* “I’ll see you around school.”
A few weeks have passed since I was nursed by [y/n]. I thought it was a bad idea, to get close to her. But through out the weeks I stopped to care. She’d choose to sit next to me during lunch and I didn’t mind. She never tried to impose and I never pushed her away. Sometime’s we’d talk, sometimes we’d just sit in silence. I let my anxiety slip away and eventually got close to her. And then, we had finally became friends.
During lunch time, Sky sat beside me and searched the table.
Sky: “Wow your girlfriend isn’t here?”
Clay: “She is not my girlfriend.”
Sky: “But you wish she was.” I fell silent and kept eating my food, “I’m sorry, did I say something wrong?” *smirks* “Didn’t picture you the popular type Jensen.”
Clay: *sighs* “ She is not… I don’t even know why I’m having the conversation with you.”
Sky: “Why don’t you stop being such a wuss and move on.”
Clay: *looks at her* “Do you even remember the last time? What happened when I got close to Hannah?”
Sky: “Oh yeah let’s all pity Clay. Please, the world didn’t revolve around Hannah Baker. She was high school kid with a shitty life and some issues, like the rest of us. Enough of her. It’s time for you to let go. If anyone should have a not so shitty life, it’s you.”
I took in a deep breath and let her words sink in. Oh the irony.
Clay: “Are you getting sappy with me? Did you just try to comfort me?” *laughs*
Sky: *dead serious stare* “Don’t make me regret this.”
Clay: “I heard you.”
Sky: “So what are you still doing here?”
It took me a second to realize what she was insinuating. I got up before she can can physically assault me and went to look for [y/n].
◆ ◆ ◆
The library always brought me some kind of peace where I can just manage all my thoughts. I had been invited by several people to Bryce’s party this evening. But I already had made other plans, a surprise actually. And parties weren’t really for me. I wondered though what it’d be like to go with Clay. To finally hold his hand and smile at each other like no one else was in the room. My heart fluttered to the idea but I pushed it away as I thought that would unlikely ever happen. Then I saw him come in the library, he scanned the whole room and smiled when he saw me. He approached me and pulled up a chair to sit beside me.
Clay: “Working on another assignment?”
You: *sighs* “Do they ever end?”
Clay: *smirks* “Do you need help?”
You: “I think I’ve got this, thanks.” *smiles*
I couldn’t help to see that he looked like he was trying to say something but couldn’t form the right words.
You: “Are you okay? You look a little shaken up.”
Clay: “You mean me? I’m fine.”
You: *shrugs* “Alright well did you hear Bryce is having a party tonight?”
Clay: *sarcastically* Yeah I actually heard. It’s not like the whole school knows.“
You: *grins* “Well I was invited by several people.”
Clay: "So… does that mean you’re going?“
You: "Nah I’m not a party person, and Bryce is an ass. Besides we’ve got plans.”
Clay: *looks nervous* “Um so yeah about… *shakes his head* "Wait we have plans? I wasn’t aware.”
You: “Meet me at the Crestmont for seven. Don’t be late.” *bell rings* “Oh we should be heading to class.”
I packed up all my stuff and tried not to show my excitement as we both left the library. Later that evening I fixed myself a little and made my way to the Crestmont. I got the whole surprise ready, and waited patiently until he came.
◆ ◆ ◆
I rode my bike to the theater. I checked my phone and it was just 6:58. I wasn’t sure what to expect, after all the theater was closed tonight for renovation. I left my bike in the back where I knew no one would try to steal it. I came back to the front and there she was. She waved as she put a strand of hair behind her ear. I smiled back, admiring her.
You: *smiles widely* “You made it.”
Clay: *sarcastically* “Actually I had made other plans, but um, I decided to come here.” *shrugs*
You: *rolls eyes playfully* “Well come inside, I’ve got a great surprise.”
I wasn’t sure what to expect, but I followed her in. We walked towards the end of the theater where there was a room being unoccupied due to the renovation. She opened the door and I couldn’t believe it. The room was unfinished, the chairs were put but there was no big screen or curtains. The surround system was already installed but the walls were bland with no light, so it would’ve been completely dark if it weren’t for the light of the projector. Also the image it produced emitted enough light to recognize my surroundings. The projector was set in front of the soon to be large screen. It displayed a menu to play the movie, Lord of the Rings. I looked around the large room and paid attention towards a couple of seats behind the projector. I saw they were being occupied by bags of popcorn and candy. I looked over at her and couldn’t help but to grin like an idiot.
Clay: *surprised* “Wow, this is–”
You: *frowns* “Please don’t say too much.”
Clay: *shakes head* “No, this is pretty cool, but Lord of the Rings? You could have picked a movie we both would have enjoyed.”
You: *shocked* “Are you kidding me? Clay, I didn’t think you out of all people would make such an assumption.”
Clay: *grins* “Well I’m sorry for not knowing you’re a bigger nerd than me.”
You: *playfully elbows his side* “Don’t push it. And for your information, I love these movies. I even got the special edition with the extra content in the film. So it’s going to be a long movie.”
The answer surprised me, and I actually felt some weird feeling in my chest. I felt my nerves kick in and feel it in my stomach. She made her way to the seats and I followed. She picked up the bag of popcorn and I held the bag of skittles. We both sat down beside each other. She pulled out two bottles of ice tea from her bag and offered me one. I grabbed it and placed it in the cup holder. I thought about it, and this whole situation seemed too good for me. With every second I tried to calm myself. I didn’t deserve all of this, and maybe this is the world setting me up for my own self destruction. Or was Sky right and maybe, just maybe I might not have such a shitty life after all.
Clay: *laughs* “You’re still a big nerd. Who would have thought.”
You: “I’m full of secrets. Now let’s enjoy the next 3 hours and 46 minutes of pure greatness.”
She pulled out the remote for the projector and pressed play.
◆ ◆ ◆
And that’s what we did, we watched the entire film. Not one single word spoken between us, just the sharing of our snacks. I stared at him a couple of times because he finally looked comfortable. When he’d catch me staring, I’d look away embarrassed. Sometimes, I noticed he was watching me, and that made me a little nervous. At some point I felt tired and placed my head against his shoulder. I think he was taken back because at first he kind of jerked. But seconds after he relaxed.
The movie ended and I lifted my head. I took the remote and went back to the main menu of the movie. I didn’t want to turn it off because then there would be no light in the room. We had finished the popcorn, candy and the drinks so we put them together in one bag. I looked over to see his reaction and he had a neutral look.
You: “I’m sure you’ve seen this many times just like me.”
Clay: “You have no idea…” *looks up at you and looks at phone* “It’s getting late.”
You: “Yeah it is.”
There was an ongoing stare being engaged by both of us, and my heart actually started to race a little. It felt like none of us truly wanted to leave.
Clay: “Well… we can always stay. Actually I’ve got a good place we can hang.”
You: *tries not to sound too excited* “Okay well lead the way.”
I carried the trash outside the room while following him. I threw it away and I was right behind him. He took me up a flight of stairs, until he opened the door and I could feel the cold, fresh breeze hit my face. We were on the roof of the Crestmont. He then sat almost close to the ledge, in front of the building. I joined him and started looking up.
You: “Do you always come up here?”
Clay: “It’s kind of my hang out. When I’m on my lunch I always come up here. Brings me a sense of nostalgia.”
You: “Nostalgic about what?”
He looked at me and looked like he was hesitating. I didn’t want to put him in a difficult position. I guess I asked a hard question, because he started fidgeting with his hands. I didn’t want to pressure him into something he didn’t want to get into. So I put my hand over his and gave him a reassuring nod.
You: “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”
He took a deep breath and started telling me the story of Hannah Baker. He cared about her; I could tell by the way he spoke about her. My heart fell while hearing everything that had happened to her. No person ever deserved that. I was able to tell Clay was the only person in her life that shed some light to the darkness she felt. Then he got to the part of the tapes, and clenched my fists of the idea Bryce raping any woman. And his friend Jeff dying, that I could tell was one of the hardest things for him. I encouraged him to keep going my giving his hand a squeeze. Then he looked down talking about his own tape. He didn’t even want to look at me. He was holding in so much guilt and shame; he didn’t think he did enough. I was almost tearing, but I gave his hand a little squeeze again when he was done.
You: “Why isn’t Bryce behind bars?”
Clay: “He’s got people covering his ass; he can basically get away with murder.”
You: “He essentially did, she deserves justice, both her and Jessica.”
Clay: *sighs* “I know but the story is a lot more complicated.”
You: “I see well I hope that son of a bitch does end up going to jail. I’m sorry about Hannah, and Jeff. They deserved better and seemed like really good people. Good to you.”
Clay: *looks at you* “Maybe, if Jessica finally realizes that she should go to the police about her rape. Honestly, sometimes I wish I could have been more involved. I wish I could have told Jeff to stay that night. I wish I could have seen that Hannah was slowly being destroyed by everyone around her. I could have helped her. She was crying for help and no one noticed.”
You: “By the sound of it, she had a lot to deal with it. And most people going through these types of issues would rather let their destruction hit them, like with Jess. And even if they wanted to get help, they don’t know how to approach people about it. So they hope someone might notice, and that person would approach them. And sadly, most of them times it’s not obvious. She made her choice. And in the end, you can’t save those who don’t want to be saved.”
Clay: *sighs* “I haven’t spoken about Hannah in a while.”
You: “It’s obvious you cared for her. And I think it’s really sweet that you have such great memories of her. Just never blame yourself for it. This wasn’t your fault.”
Clay: *looks at you* “Hannah was the first girl, well that I ever had strong feelings for. And I think that’s why it was so hard on me.”
I noticed a little tear coming out of the corner of his eye. I brought my hand to his cheek and wiped it off with my thumb.
You: “You loved her?”
He just nodded his head upon and looked down. I took my hand away from his face. It broke my heart to see him completely vulnerable. But he looked up, with some kind of determination in his face. He looked up at me and said something that surprised me.
Clay: “But I think it’s time for me to move on.”
I saw him take a quick glimpse at my lips and leaned in. I felt his soft lips against mine and my heart was slamming in my chest. I wasn’t expecting it after everything he had just told me. But it felt right, so right. I kissed him in back and wrapped my hands on the the back of his neck to bring him closer. Everything around me seemed to disappear. It was just me and him.
◆ ◆ ◆
I swallowed my nerves and went for the kiss. She put her hands on the back of my neck and drew me closer. All my nerves were replaced by adrenaline. I could feel the heat radiate from all over my body. I slipped my hands onto her waist and gave her hips a nice squeeze. I could hear a moan escape from under her breath. My heart started beating really fast. I realized that I was slowly pushing her towards the ground. I kissed her deeper, as she eventually ended up lying on the ground. She pressed her whole body against mine and that drove me crazy. Good crazy. My right hand traced the side of her body, outlining her curves. I got a panic feeling and stopped kissing her. She looked at me confused.
Clay: “I just want to make sure this is all okay with you.”
She looked at me with wonder in her eyes. She gave me light kiss on my lips and told me to get up. I got off her and we sat down again beside each other.
You: “So do I. Listen I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable with stuff like this.”
I looked at her for second before I kissed her; a slow, passionate kiss. In that moment, all I wanted was her. It wasn’t the time, and I still felt a bit anxious since the last time I kissed a girl.
Clay: “Just give me time.”
You: *grins and jokingly says* “Don’t make me wait too long alright?”
I chuckled as I gave her a light kiss. My heart was still racing from our intense kiss from before. She moved closer and put her head on my shoulder. I wrapped my arm around her waist and smiled at her.
Clay: “In truth, I don’t actually like change, but this change seems cool.”
I saw her smile while I placed a kiss on her forehead.
That is all I’m going to write or type… you know what I mean. This story doesn’t have an ending yet, but I feel the ending to this story will be different from the last. So I guess this is goodbye, for now.
See you soon,
Clay Jensen 🎧