me normally: its cool, characters with no explicit mention of their gender or sexuality can be headcanoned any way you want, just don’t be mean to other people about their headcanons and everyone can play this awesome game and relate to these characters :)
me after seeing this shit: actually you know what fuck you Blanche is totally agender now, Candela is a trans woman and her and Blanche are FUCKING MARRIED and Sporky my son is a bisexual trans boy FUCKING F I G H T M E
Context: the skeleton soul reaper and the high elf rogue go to a brothel
DM: you guys are going to have a rough night, make constitution saving throws
*soul reaper aces the first 2 and the rogue fails the second one*
Rogue: Can i use sleight of hand to tag my little head out?
*the whole table bursts in laughter*
DM: (still laughing) ok
*rogue proceeds to pass the DC*
DM: that’ll do.
I love having a boyfriend! Wait why is he putting my arm around me, this is uncomfortable. And wait now he wants to kiss? Idk even just a peck is too much for me. Wait why is he breaking up with me? We were so happy together and we’ll actually I’m happier now, huh. I guess he just wasn’t the one.