JUSTIN BIEBER IMAGINE ✨ "She's Not You" part 2 ✌🏻️
“I’m not leaving here till I have you”
The words giving me top notch anxiety.
“Well , if you’re waiting to have me back you might as well take some sips of bleach till it kicks in cause it’s not gonna happen” I say turned my head at him.
“Please don’t be like this y/n, I honestly can’t do this without you, I’ve been so depressed and down lately and I know it’s because you’re not here with me anymore.” He came closer to me
“What about you saying you’re fine without me? Those pictures you sent me of you and hailey, any of that ring a bell?!”
“That wasn’t real! Do you not understand I was putting up an act to make you jealous ! None of it is real man , none of it. No matter how much I tried to like and what other people , she’s not you, nobody is.”
“Honestly Justin, I can’t.” I turn around and nod my head, but he comes holding my hips from behind me and whispers in my ear “please do baby, I need you”
I freeze as I hear his words hit my ear “I don’t want to get hurt again.” I say under my breath, he holds me in tighter “that’s not gonna happen” this time whispering into my neck.
“I don’t know” I say , he turns me around and kisses me softly and slowly “ I know you know about that”
“Stop it” I say “well I don’t see you pulling away” he kisses me again , harder pushing me against the wall this time , having me unable to escape his grasp. “Listen Justin, I don’t want to try us again and deal with your old ways” he backs up a little
“I know that babygirl, believe me being without you the time I did makes me appreciate you even more, every moment we had. It makes me feel like a dick head knowing that I didn’t treat you the way you deserved to be treated, I’m sorry baby.”
He pulls me into him cups my cheeks and ask “am I forgiven?”
No matter what happened it’s true , I really do love him and there’s no one I can be with that I feel the same towards, I don’t know where this is going but I can’t help it.“
im that friend who does ur makeup before the function, turns up with you at the function, hypes you up at the function, take bomb ass pics of you slaying at the function bc i spent a while studying all your best angles type of friend.
Im extremly bad when it comes to waiting. Daddy gets busy sometimes and takes a while to text me back. He takes long times. Like super duper long times. I love my daddy no matter what. Its okay to wait right now. As long as I get kisses and cuddes at the end its okay.
and right as i’m standing there on the ledge, right as i’m ready to step out into nothing, to stop the constant screaming in my head that no one else can hear and plunge into whatever’s beneath me, whatever’s waiting to take me from this– i feel a hand on my back, and she gently pulls me down.
and i can’t say i didn’t think for a moment that i hoped she would push me, i can’t say i was disappointed when she helped me steady my legs after the violent shaking that came when she called me back– but it was the golden days that followed soon after when i was glad she did.
she only came around when i was losing it, when i was on the brink of insanity. right when i had convinced myself that no one cared and that i would never amount to anything, she told me that i was wrong. and in her eyes, she showed me that i was loved, but she never said a word.
and she was seldom the same person twice– sometimes in the shape of a friendly stranger or my mother calling down for dinner. sometimes she was a friend asking me if i was okay, or a flower blooming up from the sidewalk cracks, or a four leaf clover waiting in the grass. sometimes she was just someone who happened to look up, who happened to think of me, who happened to want to make sure that everything was fine.
and every time, she has saved me.
every time, she has pulled me back or taken the bottle of pills from my hands.
and god i know there are some days where existing is too heavy a burden to bear– but for all the times she has saved me, i am so grateful for that.
and i don’t always remember her, some days i don’t even know that she’ll come.
but for the days when i fall apart, she does.
and right as i’m standing on the ledge, right as i’m willing to lose it all, she is there.
and she is telling me, even when i don’t believe her, that it is better to endure than to fall.
Talking about songs that take u back to a place. I Will Wait - Mumford and Sons takes me back to a festival where I saw them headline.. I had a v casual thing with a guy who was older and going to uni that weekend, after that weekend nothing happened between us, but it was the first night of the festival so i was open to possibilities.. Whenever I hear this song I can feel myself holding hands with him in the crowd, and I wonder if the lyrics meant the same thing to him at the time