wait was i supposed to be adult or something

kitsunesongs  asked:

Thanks to mystical force shenanigans, obi-Wan gets turned into a cat - and he thinks/reacts like a cat, albeit an Obi-Wan one. He likes and dislikes who Obi-Wan likes and dislikes - and Anakin is really happy when Cat!Obi makes it clear he likes Anakin best.

He wasn’t smug, not really.

No of course not, this was about Obi-Wan’s health and safety and that took precedence above everything else, even Anakin’s personal feelings on the matter.

Or, well, perhaps he was a tiny bit smug.

But Obi-Wan was curled up in his lap, sleeping!

When he had been called up to the council chambers he had no idea what he could possibly have done this time to garner their attention and Obi-Wan hadn’t been giving him any long looks that meant he knew something so what in the world could it be?

And when he hadn’t seen Obi-Wan or a holo of the man despite feeling him, that had made him even more worried about perhaps them exhiling him?

No no, they couldn’t do that, they were in the middle of a war and Anakin had a padawan and…and…

There was a ginger thing on Obi-Wan’s chair and Anakin only gave half an ear to Windu as the man drone into something about an artifact and the Force.

“…Obi-Wan?” Anakin called out and moved to the chair, kneeling down as a soft furry head lifted, a green eyed tabby blinking sleepily at him before butting him in the nose.

“As I was trying to tell you, there was an incident and Master Obi-Wan got turned into his…into this. He’s a feline.” Mace grunted and Anakin gave him a quick glance before focusing back on the now awake feline who was standing up and stretching on the chair.

“So this IS Obi-Wan?”

“Him it is, but react like a cat he does.” Yoda hummed. “Smart feline who likes what Obi-Wan likes. No control of the Force though and spends more time napping in the sun then he does being concerned about his situation.”

Anakin blinked. “Is there a way to reverse it?”

“We are looking into it.” Depa spoke up from her chair. “But so far our investigation indicates that he will turn back on his own in a few days.”

Anakin would have answered if it wasn’t for Obi-Wan placing his paws on the blond’s shoulder and happily nuzzling him before he climbed onto him and curled around Anakin’s neck, a warm purring shape on the young knight.

‘Reacts like a cat, but likes what Obi-Wan likes…’ Anakin smiled a bit and reached up, scratching the soft tabby ears while standing slowly. “Comfortable Obi-Wan?”

A loud purr.

“Of course he lets Skywalker touch him.” Depa sighed. “Do you know how difficult it was to get him to the shuttle to get him to the temple?” She gave him a long look. “He even scratched me!”

“He’s scratched everyone but Yoda and Yoda hasn’t tried picking him up.” Adi shook her head.

“Are we even surprised that he likes Skywalker best?” Mace questioned, looking around as Kit and Plo exchanged small snickers together. Yoda just outright cackled.

“I’ll take him to my rooms, look after him.”

“A litter box you will need for him.” Yoda smirked at him.

“…You are aware there are self cleaning litter boxes?” Anakin raised his eyebrows while scratching the furry ears, Obi-Wan purring like an engine in his ear. “I won’t have to clean up after him as long as he uses it and he won’t have to be embarrassed once he turns back about it.”

There were a few grumbles about that, obviously the idea of teasing Obi-Wan had been an attractive idea.

Anakin had bowed, carefully with Obi-Wan on his shoulders and headed out with the tabby, heading right to his quarters while typing in an order for a self cleaning litter box to be delivered asap. He loved Obi-Wan, he really did but he was honestly not going to clean up after him.

But sitting on the couch with the other sleeping on his lap, purring softly as Anakin petted him with his flesh hand?

Now there was something he could totally do.

“I would have thought you’d be hungry by now Obi-Wan.” He grinned down at the feline.

There was a loud purr and then a meow, the tabby stretching before standing and placing his paws on Anakin’s chest, rising as long as his furry little body could as he stared at him with slanted eyes.

Then he licked Anakin’s nose.

“Oh no that’s adorable.” Ahsoka cooed.

Anakin snorted as Obi-Wan dropped out of his lap and moved to the kitchen. “If you say so Snips.” He got up and followed after Obi-Wan, smiling down at the cat before getting a saucer and filling it with blue milk before rummaging around in the fridge for something to feed him. “Are cats suppose to eat raw meat?”

“Um…” Ahsoka looked it up quickly. “It says here that while they can, you shouldn’t feed house cats raw meat because the bacteria could give them food poisoning. And no chives, garlic, onions, fat trimmings, bones, mil-milk? Oh! Apparently adult cats grow lactose intolerant.”

Anakin squeaked, actually squeaked, and looked down to the empty saucer on the floor. “…I hope that won’t be to bad.”

Obi-Wan just looked smugly up at him while flickering his tail, obviously waiting for food.

“Anything more?”

“No raw fish for the same reason as raw meat.”

Anakin nodded and took out a slice of steak he had been saving but hey, he could always cut a bit off and cook it up for Obi-Wan. “No spices then I imagine.”

“Considering all the stuff he’s not suppose to eat, I think its best to just cook it normally.”

“…Oil, I should use oil, no butter.”

“Good idea. Who knew pet keeping could be this much work, I think I’ll stick with Rex and the rest of the 501.”

“I’ll tell them you said that.” Anakin sniggered as he cut the meat pieces small and started frying them up, Obi-Wan rubbing against his legs as he did.

“Please do, Rex already knows.”

For a film that’s been in development hell for a decade or so you’d never know because IT is the real deal. Far too often most Stephen King stories seem to fall short when adapted for cinema (Stand By Me and Frank Darabont are the only ones who truly seem to “get” what his stories are and never sacrifice tone or feeling when translating to the visual medium) . IT not only completely captures the essence of the source material but gets the honor treatment while delivering the greatest group of kids we’ve seen since Super 8 (I’ll always love Super 8, I don’t care if you don’t).

The film centers around a group of teenage outcasts in 1988: Bill, a kid with a stutter still dealing with the disappearance of his younger brother Georgie;  Richie, the jokester; Ben, the fat kid; Stanley, the son of a rabbi; Eddie, a mama’s boy taking loads of medication; and Mike, a home-schooled black kid. Together they all make up the Losers’ Club. The boys also bring in Beverly, a female from their class with a rough home life (that’s putting it kindly…which it isn’t) into the club. As local kids begin to go missing, Bill believes it ties into his brother’s disappearance and convinces his friends to help him investigate the history of the town and the sewer system that runs throughout it which of course leads to the discovery of the entity taking the form of a clown called Pennywise

Set in the 1980′s the film is beautifully shot while bringing out some of the nostalgia that Steven Spielberg and others captured/crafted (kids riding around town on their bike’s solving a mystery will always be my favorite thing in this world) while being a bit less in your face about it than Stranger Things currently is (don’t take this as a Stranger Things knock because I love it…but you know it). There are plenty of 80′s references to be had (New Kids On The Block, AIDS, Molly Ringwald, Arcades, etc…) but they are less slamming you over the head with a sledgehammer which makes this feel more timeless/timely. 

The kids are the most impressive aspect of this film. It’s truly an ensemble cast with each kid getting a fully developed character and ample time to shine. They are all unique, individual and have a real friendship that consists of insults, swearing (the kids say “fuck” constantly the entire film and I adore it for this fact) and one-upping each other whenever possible. It all feels completely natural which is one of the toughest things to pull off. They also really dive deep into the coming-of-age aspects of being a young teen and that in-and-of itself is a great thing to watch unfold (the awkwardness of adolescence has never been more front-and-center in a really genuine/impactful way). 

Now we come to Pennywise. Bill Skarsgard is really good here. His voice is a bit of a chore to get through but luckily he’s not monologuing all that much (aside from a couple key moments). He’s creepy and watching him mess with his victims is pretty fun. He’s scary looking but this leads me into my only real gripe with the film…

IT really isn’t all that scary. Sure, there are scares but it never gets to the level you’d expect it to. The jump scares don’t work the way I believe they thought they would and I really can’t figure out why. Both Conjuring 2 and Lights Out were waaaaaaaay more effective in invoking genuine fear and uneasiness while watching them. This is honestly like “can we get back to the kids now”. The character moments are better than the scares. 

At 135 minutes it’s a tad too long (but every movie today is). It does fly by pretty quickly until the 3rd act where it takes a bit too much time to get them back into the sewers which plays Beverly as a damsel-in-distress and I’m not too keen on this aspect (but it’s better than the novel ending I suppose - or at least it’s a filmable ending). You know what though? I’m letting it slide because of how great everything else is. IT simply works. Stand By Me, The Shawshank Redemption, IT. In that order for me in terms of adapting King. I can’t wait for Chapter 2 and seeing The Losers’ Club as adults (hopefully they’ll get dream casting with how much money this one made) and if they can learn how to build up the horror moments (someone should talk to James Wan) we’ll have something truly special. Come for the clown, stay for the teenaged angst and friendship. 

@jimy-kirks replied to your post “Killing Han Solo was the wrong call because it deprives us of a trio…”

Wait. Are you telling me he ISN’T supposed to be some emo kid who cant grow facial hair?

I mean, he’s played by an actor in his 30s. If that’s what they were going for, they failed. Instead he just comes across as an entitled and whiny adult who should have gotten over this by now. 

I mean, if when he took of his helmet, you saw this:

it’d be like “hold the phone that is a fucking child. Something is very wrong here”

but instead it’s like

“look at this grown-ass man throw a temper tantrum” and like booooo I’m bored. 

I get that subtextually Kylo Ren WAS that kid once. That’s what we’re supposed to infer. He was a kid and he was groomed into being this emotionally stunted and misguided adult man. And we’re supposed to feel some sympathy for that story, both because it is abstractly sad, and because his parents are characters we are already attached to.

But him already being an adult makes all that far less present and more difficult to immediately connect to. Instead what you immediately connect to is that he’s torturing our leads and then murdering Han fucking Solo before Han and Luke can have a reunion. And then the narrative tries to go “but don’t you feel a little bad for him?” and even if I should, no I don’t. I find him obnoxious at best and vile at worst. And the only reason I care at all about him getting any kind or arc or redemption that would waste precious screentime on his face is because Leia deserves something in her life to not be fucking miserable. 

Now, listen, ideally I would have them cut the plot of him being Han and Leia’s kid altogether. Him being some orphan or some other person’s kid who was strong and roped into this appeals to me better personally. But if you’re going to keep it, doesn’t it raise the stakes so much higher if they are trying to get back their actual kidnapped child who is still a child who they want to keep and raise? Isn’t everything about Kylo Ren immediately more compelling, more distinct, more interesting, more sad, if he’s a fourteen-year-old?

Like, fuck, we all went through a “dark” phase. At some point or another everyone’s thought “no one understands me” and over-identified with the bad guy in a movie or TV show going “this is me, misunderstood and evil” and, like, you want to base a villain on that? Honestly not an inherently bad call. 

But my Phantom of the Opera obsession happened when I was 13, not 30. A broody 13-year-old who loves Darth Vader is way more likable than a broody adult. 

I mean, we’re clearly meant to want to a redemption arc for this guy. And I don’t care. I have no interest in that. 

But if he’d been an actual child, I might have. And I realize that might be unsophisticated and short-sighted. After all, there’s a very solid argument to be made that everything that would be tragic or interesting about that kid still happened. We just didn’t see it happen. But just because we didn’t see it, does that mean we shouldn’t care? But that’s not good filmmaking.  

Film is a language of shorthand. Especially big blockbusters. Especially Star Wars. It about quick immediately recognizable archetypes and communicating information you understand as quickly as possible. Kylo Ren’s tragic backstory is not immediately communicated emotionally or textually. Making him an actual small underage child would solve that problem. You would immediately understand what the stakes and what the tragedy are here. 

Now what?

I’m watching Rick Steves’ Europe: Paris (because I occasionally like to adult) and my 3 year old comes into the room.

Emma:  It’s the Eiffel Tower!  Where Hawkmoth lives with butterflies! *is RIVETED to the screen*

On one hand, yay for watching something educational that’s not a cartoon.  On the other…she’s waiting for Ladybug to show up.  

mizjoely  asked:

22. I don’t know why I married you. 23. Have you ever lied to me? 24. If I trip over one more of your shoes, I’m throwing them all away. 25. Aren’t you supposed to be the adult? Any of them or a combo - my additional challenge is to use the same prompt(s) for Warstan and Sherlolly?

((Cracks knuckles)) Challenge accepted.  Though you’ll have to wait on the Sherlolly because this one ended up going lengthy.


“I’m starting to think our marriage counselor may be a quack, John.”

He laughed, because he kind of agreed with her (and because they’d had a bit of wine while doing this week’s homework assignment.)  The concept was solid… “get to know the person you married,” but the execution was flawed.

John drew another card from the box.

“Oh, my God.  It’s ‘Have you ever lied to me?’”

“No, never,” Mary said innocently, taking another drink.

“Assassin living under assumed name.”

“Accidentally seduced by secret third Holmes sibling in her clever disguise of pretty girl on bus.”

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RotG Jackrabbit Week: Crossover

I have written a lot of RotG crossover fics. Found one I hadn’t done: Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. I may write a follow up to this later, because I have feels about Charlie needing some friends.

On AO3: Wingfic AU, Retail AU, Soulmarks, Royalty AU, Time Travel, Crossover


Edible Landscaping

Jack eagerly followed Bunny down the tunnel he’d formed, expected to emerge into some other spirit domain. Instead, they exited into the parking lot of an industrial complex. Huh.

“A factory?” Jack hadn’t been sure what Bunny had meant by needing to do some magical maintenance work on a garden for a friend, but he was curious as hell. This was no spirit domain, however. Dull, grey, and industrial… Wait. “Is your friend human?”

“Mostly,” Bunny answered and made for the large metal doors. Jack ran to catch up.

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anonymous asked:

Okay okay, so I was just chilling the other day and I realized something: a friend of mine and me are basically Percy and Annabeth at this age (15) like... people (mainly upperclassmen and adults) will say things like "go talk to your best friend" in THAT voice and we'll both like look at each other all blushy and be like "s/he's not my best friend what pfft" and his face lights up when he sees me and I'm sure mine does, too and we're awkward in the crush way but like... what am I supposed to do

wait hold up (i’m the percabeth anon) I JUST REMEMBERED THAT HE LITERALLY JOINED A SPORT WHERE WE DO NOTHING BUT RUN BECAUSE I SAID HE SHOULD AND WE ALWAYS HIGH FIVE AND STUFF AND DO THAT DUMB TEENAGER GRIN WHAT IS H A P P E N I N G


sounds like you got a bad case of the crush my friend, try not to wait until a life or death situation to tell each other how you feel like percabeth did

anonymous asked:

hey could you do 75 with jester & shadowman for the ask ?

75. “You fainted, straight into my arms. You know, if you wanted my attention, you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”


“What happened?” Shadowman groaned. There was something wrong with the ground. It kept moving and it wouldn’t stand still. Also, he was pretty sure the ground was supposed to go below him, but he couldn’t be sure with his head pounding like this.

“You fainted, straight into my arms.” Who was - was that Jester? Where was he? “You know, if you wanted my attention, you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”

Shadowman finally located him, his face floating somewhere below him in the sky; then located the ground, which, yes, was supposed to go beneath him, even though it seemed to be bouncing; then located his memories. And. Hold on.

“You bashed me in the head!”

“Well. Such things happen. Can’t be helped. But you’re okay now!”

Was he? Shadowman was pretty sure he was not okay - unless the earth and the sky were supposed to be trading places like that. And was he … floating? Pretty sure that’s not supposed to happen.

“Wha-? Where -?” He couldn’t keep a straight thought long enough to form actual sentences. What was going on? He vaguely remembered Jester trying to attack someone - assumedly an adult - hopefully an adult - but nailing him in the head. He remembered going down. But he couldn’t remember how he’d gotten here. Or what here was.

“Just hang on, we’ll be alright!” Jester’s voice sounded weird. Strained, like he was carrying something heavy. But that couldn’t be it because Jester never did any physical labor, especially not when there were other kids around to do it for him. And Shadowman was pretty sure they had had other kids with them. At some point. Where were they again?

The night sky - night? what time was it? he couldn’t remember - above them and the ground below them kept trading places, and Shadowman kept floating along. Jester really seemed to be straining with something. Maybe he could help him. Probably not, but it was polite to ask. “Do you need help, Magic Man?”

Jester laughed, though he didn’t seem happy. “Oh, yeah, I could really use your help right now. It’d be nice if your stupid legs decided to actually work.”

His legs? What was wrong with his legs? He couldn’t really feel them, that was for sure. Was that something that should bother him? He got the vague notion that it should, but he was a little more invested in the moon moving around. He thought he remembered that being mostly stationary.

“Almost there.” Jester grunted.

Almost where? He thought he had said that outloud. Jester didn’t answer, though, so probably not. Oops.

After what felt simultaneously like two minutes, an hour, and several days, they must have reached wherever Jester had been talking about because he suddenly laid Shadowman (re: unceremoniously dumped) on the ground. It looked like they were in a building - at least, Shadowman couldn’t see the sky anymore, above or below him, just flat gray expanses he figured for walls and a ceiling. At least the floor had stopped bouncing and he’d stopped floating.

Come to think of it, those things were probably related to Jester carrying him - wait, had Jester been carrying him? The boy weighed maybe ninety pounds soaking wet, how had he even picked him up?

“You’re much easier to carry when you’ve just been knocked silly and you can’t tense up or resist.” Huh. He wasn’t entirely sure he had asked any of his questions out loud, but hey, at least he’d gotten an answer.

“Where -?”

Jester hushed him. He whispered, “You’re someplace safe. I’m leaving you here, and I’m going to keep looking for more kids. We need them now more than ever since we just lost our whole group.”

Shadowman struggled to compute all the different incoming information. Finally, all he could focus on was, “You’re leaving?”

Jester’s face swam into view above him. Good, that’s where that was supposed to be. Jester didn’t look happy, though, he looked … terrified? He wasn’t sure. He couldn’t remember the last time he had seen any real emotion from Jester.

“Yes, I’m leaving. But you’ll be safe here. I promise. No adults will get you, and you can … heal up, or something, I dunno’ what you do with a head injury. Sleep it off? That sounds right.”

He had a head injury? That made a lot of sense. It certainly explained the pain. But, wait a minute, he remembered knowing that before. And, wait a minute! “You hit me in the head!”

Jester sighed. “Yes, I did. Please get over it. It really wasn’t intended and, anyway, I did save your life.”

Yeah, okay, it sure did seem like he had done that. But now he was leaving him. And even worse, Shadowman suddenly remembered something else, something Jester had said earlier:

“Wait. Were you flirting with me!?”


Real talk. I have no idea how to write for Jester or Shadowman. I hope you still like this, though!

anonymous asked:

you truly prove that both most adults and psychs are literal demons who hate kids and willfully harm them because they only care about their own ass. hope you never get to practice when you basically think even 13yo children should somehow be 100% aware of how to recognize grooming and abuse when even most adults can't. such a stand up psych! can't wait for you to call your abuse survivor patients stupid for getting abused or whatever, especially if it happened online :)

You honestly don’t know the difference between a psychologist and a psychotherapist, do you? Or between a patient-therapist relationship and blogging online? I mean I suppose you don’t have to.
But in that case let me tell you something important:
This page is not a clinic.
I am not your therapist.

If you seek counseling you will have to look in another place.

And I do take it sort of personal you call me a demon. If you have to be so overdramatic let me assure you, I shall only be addressed as Satan himself

Hoshidan Festival: Dwyer Special Kimono Image Convo

I (Kiyoshi) know that a lot of people don’t seem to actually use Dwyer that often, but he’s always been my best butler (shhh - don’t tell Jakob) and maxed out as a butler he had the largest stat rating for me (253, including statues) out of all my units. And I do in fact love his personality. He’s actually lazy but he’s also a hard worker with a competitive streak, AND he’s pretty no-nonsense, which I like. Plus he’s exceptionally gentlemanly with women and dishes out heartfelt compliments so casually that it feels genuine. Unlike Laslow, Dwyer actually has a shot of being a ladies’ man if he could just clean himself up a bit more…

Something that surprised me in this translation; when it comes to himself, Dwyer is not shy. If you’ve ever walked into him in the bathhouse as a girl, he just casually mentions that Jakob would get angry but he doesn’t actually care. His sprite doesn’t even bother to stand up. Here, he’s totally fine with letting the Merchant help him change clothes. Which is funny because he freaked out when Soleil did it in their supports. Maybe it’s the difference between his ‘same-aged’ peers and people he considers ‘adults’. 

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I’m going to try to describe what this moment was like for me when I saw it on Wednesday. It’s difficult to put into words. It was like someone had suddenly wrapped me in a blanket of dread. That music kicked in, and the barbed bracelet circles started flying, and I HAD A REACTION. I had an actual physical reaction to it. I took a sharp breath and it felt like my heart seized up. But it was completely without context. I’m reacting to this and I have no idea why.

Memory is such a strange thing. I remembered so few details about Stars. (I didn’t even know I remembered THIS until there it was.) Yet suddenly there are all these EMOTIONS and you can’t be sure where they’re coming from or going to.

I know me. I would’ve watched this over and over again. Don’t get me wrong, I am wailing in agony and my tears are real and everything I am going to be writing about HURTS ME DEEPLY. But they’re all (well, mostly) The Good Hurts, the kind that remind you how much you love these characters, and how much they love each other, and how very very important all that is.

I MEAN I WATCHED AN ALL-TIME FAVOURITE CHARACTER HAVE A DRAWN-OUT DEATH WITH HER BEST FRIEND CRYING OVER HER IN THE ULTIMATE EMOTIONAL EXPRESSION OF THE SIGNIFICANCE OF ONE OF MY MOST CHERISHED FICTIONAL RELATIONSHIPS FOR THE PAST TWENTY YEARS

TRUST ME WHEN I SAY I AM DEVASTATED AND LOVING IT

So that music, the sudden chord erupting from the silence and tension of the moment, would have been the signifier that all that pain, that delicious delicious pain, was coming.

Then fast-forward decades later, and the details are gone. The whys and hows have left me. There’s only THIS. This flash of intense emotions that I feel, that are mine, but also NOT mine because I don’t understand them.

I wouldn’t have needed help to feel the things that I did, but it added an interesting dimension to it all, made it a bit more REAL, almost. It was overshadowed so quickly by what happened, but it was such an intense moment for me, I wanted to try to capture it.

It’s amazing, the power that stories have.

We Became Fans of Collisions part 1

Pairings: Narry, Lilo

Warnings: eventual smut, language

Summary: They’re looking at each other now, a few feet away but it feels like miles between their bodies, between their hands. Harry feels like there’s a knife in his stomach and an arrow (thanks to Cupid) in his chest. He isn’t sure which one aches more.

After kicking out the old guitarist Harry was left distraught for a replacement when he suddenly found talented street performer Niall Horan, on the corner of First Ave. AU credit to whatdidyoudosaturday.

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Akuma no Riddle is shit

Akuma no Riddle is absolute shit and I shall explain why.

This anime is about nothing: nothing ever happens, there is no conclusion, no plot, no character development, no nothing. These 12 episodes amounted to absolutely nothing and to me Akuma no Riddle and a turd are the exact same thing.

Let’s go over the “plot”.

So, we have this clan in which the female heir has the ability to “control” or “manipulate” the people around her to serve and protect her even if she’s not using it consciously and somehow that led to the deaths of various clan members and even her own family who died protecting her from harm. What harm?

No one ever told us who the fuck tried ripping Haru’s fucking legs off in the first place or why the fucking hell does she have a titanium rib in her fucking chest did they? No, all they did was plaster some “super awesome amazing scars” all over her body and leave it to be “oh so very mysterious”.

So why the hell would anyone try to target some girl in the first place? We don’t know.

We don’t even know why her clan is oh so prestigious and important do we? All we know is that some woman’s hobby is to stuff a few assassins in some classroom along with airhead girl nº1, sit back and watch the show in some high tech room. It’s not even specified whether they’re related or not, all we know is that for some messed up reason their clan’s cemetery is located underneath Myojo Academy and that Yuri has the power to throw their clan’s heir to the sharks while laughing at it only to see if the girl can survive.

Sure, let us all ignore the crazy amount of scars she has plastered all over her body cause oh well, those aren’t proof enough that YES HARU CAN FUCKING SURVIVE PRETTY MUCH ANYTHING EVEN HER GODDAMN LEGS ALMOST GETTING RIPPED OFF.

Alright, so that’s the main “plot”, kind of. Does it tell us anything about the story? Not really no, it’s just a game that Haru happened to survive thanks to Tokaku. That’s it, that’s the whole story, it ends there: Haru gets thrown into a classroom full of assassins who happen to be targeting her, Tokaku volunteers to help her and in the end everyone survives, happy ending.

And now some people may wonder “Whaat no that can’t just be it? What about all the other girls and that white haired dude?”

Oh, you mean that good for nothing character? The one who happens to have the same exact design as Giovanni from DOGS Bullets and Carnage? Yes. That very same dude who does absolutely nothing throughout the series aside from sending some riddles to Tokaku and grin like a dummass.

So, since the main plot turned out to be absolutely pointless as there is no goal to the game the girls were submitted to apart from making their wishes come true, let’s at least try to talk about the other characters, maybe they’ve brought some excitement to the bland, pointless anime? Answer is no.

All of the girl’s stories are stupid as hell, none of them making actual sense and honestly I can’t really believe some of the people here on tumblr actually have “feels” for this stupid fucking anime and characters. Just so you know, in my opinion Boku no Pico has a better plot development than the whole AnR anime.

Haru is dumb as fuck, enough said.

I don’t even know where her strange “oh lol I can resist any kind of sleep inducing drug ever” ability came from, what was this author thinking? Do they simply make up new abilities for Haru everytime something happens?

I still don’t understand why the other assassins had to wait for each other’s announcements and all that, if it was supposed to give off a very “adult” or “professional” vibe then it totally failed, miserably. Haru is just.. I don’t even want to go there.

Don’t get me wrong, Akuma no Riddle could’ve worked pretty well if it had aired back in the year 2001.

Next up we have Tokaku, I don’t even.

Let’s analyse her background story:

                Her grandmother wanted her to fight, her aunt and mom didn’t so granny killed both her daughters just to take Tokaku back and train her to be an assassin. Before her aunt died she told Tokaku both she and her mother would be looking after her, preventing her from actually killing someone so that’s why she can’t kill anyone throughout the series.

Is this even relevant to the plot? No. The anime ends with Haru and Tokaku hanging out in the streets without us ever even knowing what the hell happened. My best guess would be Tokaku’s wish being something like being freed from her clan or both Haru and her being freed from their own two respective clans. But wait, Tokaku didn’t actually kill Haru so, yeah. Who needs rules anyways right?

Then we have Nio, is she relevant? Absolutely not. She’s just Yuri’s pawn to try and kill off Haru in the end because why the fuck not. All of her backstory and abilities were completely ignored because well, she spent the last episode disguised as Tokaku anyways throwing invisible knives at Tokaku’s head just for fun.

I actually liked her design and her as a character at first but those tacky tattoos were just.. No.

Isuke is just.. I don’t even, her backstory is just dumb. She’s just a girl with a bad case of Stockholm Syndrome who talks too much, but at least she tried killing Haru more than once so she’s got that going for her.

Although her design is shit and her backstory turned out to be even shittier I did like its concept, you know, the assassin dude who saved her having called himself both Daddy and Mommy so Isuke wouldn’t need to feel lonely or something. Turns out he’s just gay, alright.

Worse than that is Isuke’s fucking ending, she fucking lost the game and the final result is her hanging out at the beach with her parents, again, who needs rules anyways right? See where I’m getting at? If in the end Yuri was just going to release everyone in the end then what about all the hostility between clans and assassins and shit when everything is just fucking pointless?

With this I’m not trying to say everyone should have died for it to be a good anime, I’m just saying it was a major let down to see the girls alive and kicking after dying their own tragic deaths. If there’s no punishment for failing then.. Fuck me, seriously. Moving on.

Hanabusa is going to become a chef, I arrest my case. Is that supposed to be a good happy ending? What was she supposed to be anyways, robot girl? She fell down a goddamn sky scrapped and ended up surviving, alright.

Next we have Mahiru or Shinya or whatever. I actually thought she was pretty cool but really? Achieving enlightenment on top of a hill? Too bad that’s not the crappiest ending in the series.

Haruki is one of the girls who actually got a decent ending. Her wish was for her family to never have to go through financial difficulties ever again, she tried killing Haru and failed because of Tokaku’s miracle intervention SO in the end she had to go work to help her family with their financial struggles! Something that finally makes sense in this goddamn anime!

These two bitches are just dumb. Their episode was rushed like fuck, wasting the actually good idea they had for their deaths which ended up being FAKE. Someone please explain to me how would two chicks survive a stab to the heart and drinking poison? Why would they even sacrifice themselves for each other when they had only known each other for around a week? I actually do think their story had potential for a 26 episode anime, not a 12 episode one.

Kouko’s story isn’t even bad but it’s not fascinating either, she ends up killing all the nuns in the organization she’s from when her wish was to be freed from the assassination business. Sure, alright.

Shiena was killed with poison to the face, survived and ended up hacking the school’s website in a bathroom stall. If that doesn’t spell out miserable character for you then I don’t know what would.

Suzu is just dumb, who the hell would think hiding a playing card inside a watermelon was a good idea? That pool episode was simply sad, I don’t even. Her design is horrible, her story is dumb as fuck and just.. No.

This one bitch was actually cool, I liked her alot and she’s actually the only girl that ended up in jail?? I don’t even, I could go on and on and on with this post but I’m getting kinda tired now so meh. 

So, in the end Akuma no Riddle was just a pointless shit anime, I’m glad it’s over and I do hope this fandom dies eventually because seriously dudes, Boku no Pico has a better plot than this piece of shit.

y'all there’s nothing wrong with being an adult and seeing Finding Dory, I happily sat my grown ass down last night and loved every minute of it… but, please don’t be one of those “only 90’s kIDZ should see this movie!! fuck any toddler who wants to see it!! I’ve been waiting 15 years!!!!” kinda person. Enjoy it yourself, but understand that there’s a whole generation of kids who wanna see this and will love it just as much as you. It will really mean something to them down the road, just as all these Pixar movies mean something to you. Film is supposed to be a shared experience, so… like…

don’t be a weird asshole about it.

Realistic New Year’s Resolutions for Reluctant Adults

1. Remember to lift your wiper blades if there’s snow in the forecast. Sometimes, you know there’s a real adult nearby just by looking at context clues. Do you see a car parked uphill with the front tires turned away from the curb? You know damn well a grown ass adult parked that car. Did someone just write you a check and actually fill in the memo blank with something other than “pornography” or “my butt”? That bill of exchange was definitely written by someone who’s really got their shit together. Are there light flurries coming down out of the sky, but yours is the only car on the street whose wiper blades aren’t sticking straight up in the air? Then I hope you take the extra time you’ll require to get your car cleaned off after six inches of snowfall to think about the myriad ways in which you’re disappointing your parents. (Addendum: please remember to put said wipers back down before you use them, otherwise when you turn them on it’ll look like your car is frantically trying to wave “hello” to someone.)

2. Don’t drink quite as much. Mmhmm yes, I know. Easier said than done. But the older you get, the harsher your hangovers are. A night of drinking that would have had you leaping like a sprightly gay gazelle out of bed in the morning at 21 has you flolloping sadly out of bed like a lasagna noodle that’s been soaked in vinegar and then had its feelings hurt. Basic corporeal functions are so difficult during an adult hangover that it feels like your entire body is slave to a puppet master who has no idea how humans are supposed to walk, talk, eat, or function. Additionally, drunk adult texts are soooooooo much sadder than drunk teen or twenty-something texts. “omg i love youssoomch plz lets go to CANADAA togeter (seventeen heart-eye emojis)” evolves into “what even is the point of anything tho” or “jus plz txt me when you home so Iknowyoure not dead (skull emoji).” It’s not pretty. Morning You will appreciate Last Night You’s prescience re: the existential horror of a morning after too much whiskey.

3. Get rid of some clothes. Wait until your lowest point of the week, emotionally. No, seriously. This is the absolute best time to get rid of clothes you don’t really wear, because you’re not feeling particularly confident or optimistic about anything,and that will translate into not giving a shit about most of your clothes. (It’s sort of like the “don’t go grocery shopping when you’re hungry” logic.) Feeling generally shitty about life, decisions you’ve made re: life, life’s general trajectory, the ineffable knowledge that the one life you have will be over in a cosmic blink of an eye? Great! Then you definitely don’t need that argyle cardigan you bought five years ago because you thought it made you look “professorial.” And your collection of seventeen v-neck tees in a variety of colors could be pared down to a respectable five and you wouldn’t even miss the other twelve at all because you’ll be too busy thinking about global warming and America’s failed justice system!

4. Spend more time with puppies. Puppies get it, man. They’re just hanging out, doing their thing, chewing on their own feet, not giving two craps about the world. Whatever’s in front of them at any particular moment is the coolest most wonderful thing ever and it must be sniffed incessantly and then maybe sat on or else it could disappear/become sad/fly away. Find a bunch of puppies to squish up into your face in 2016. If that doesn’t drastically improve your outlook on life, then I don’t know how you’re even reading this because you’re clearly a brick or a slab of cement with no feelings.

5. Be less judgy. This may require a pretty drastic paradigm shift for you if you’re inclined toward the belief that yours are the most important opinions, proper tastes, or ways of living life. If this is in fact the case, then please put this item at the top of the list as it is of the utmost importance for everyone else’s sake that you change this mode of thinking pronto. But you, like pretty much everybody else on earth, probably just lean slightly toward a natural solipsism that, if left unchecked, can poop little droppings of judgment out its butt and leave them disagreeably on the carpet for others to step in. And that’s ok! Just try to tell yourself a few times a day that the fact that you don’t like something or disagree with an opinion doesn’t mean others aren’t entitled to like it or agree with it. Not super into Star Wars? Cool, great, awesome, who cares. Not super into people who are super into Star Wars? I’m sure that gives you some modicum of comfort while you sit around being a huge bummer, but zip it. Being super excited about something puts more positive vibes out there in the world than being a buzzkill does. So less haterade, more “OMG YASS,” please.

6. Learn all the words to The Animaniac’s 50 states and capitals song. Not only would it make for a great party trick, serve you well at most standard bar trivia nights, and woo any and all prospective romantic conquests toward you like you’re a sexy and erudite tractor beam, it would also place you among the, I dunno, 2% of Americans who can name all the states and capitals in under three minutes. SUPER worth your time.

7. Find at least one friend with whom you can invent an elaborate secret high five.The more complex the better. I bet this would feel so cool.

Katie Sisneros

Tough motherfuckers.

There is a lot I don’t share on here anymore. 

When I started this blog like 10 years ago, I prided myself on transparency. I thought it was daring to tell people my address, or how much money I made that year, or even the size of my penis. I liked being an example of how vulnerability is strength. 
I still do - but to a point. 

I have made mention of the people who have outright stalked me. Showing up at my apartment late at night or early in the morning, and truthfully, that shit doesn’t bug me all that much. If someone thinks what I do is that awesome that they would take the time out of their day to find where I live, show up, and brave the embarrassment to say hi or shake my hand - well fuck, the least I could do is sit down with them over coffee. And let’s be real here for a minute, you can’t really creep out a creep, right?

But then there are the darker aspects. Those who dehumanize me because they don’t see me as a person but as a person with which to practice online target practice. Again, fine. I can take everything you can throw. I rarely mention it because I don’t want to give those abusive people the airtime they tend to thrive upon. 

I will say this, with the bullying comes a certain confidence. See, you either grow some thick skin, or you sink into a crying depression. And I don’t have time for that shit. Or maybe I do, but I would rather spend it eating hot dogs and petting cats. It’s not about building walls to keep people out, it’s about learning to take a punch in order to allow people in. 

Most people you meet are good people. Gay, straight, Christians, Muslims, black, jew, etc. You get what I’m saying. Most people are good people, meaning they’re not going to cut in front of you at the grocery store, they’ll pick up your phone if you drop it, and they will hold the elevator for you. And that’s saying a lot because I live in the heart of a pretty big city known for it’s indifference. 

So what am I getting at? 
Bullying will never go away. We can do our best to educate people, our children, friends, co-workers, as to how their thoughtlessness and spite impacts us and those around us but it’s a truth of life - there will always be assholes of every shape size and color and we need to learn how to take a goddamn punch. Should we have to? Absolutely not. We shouldn’t have to play victim our entire lives. People should have enough intelligence and care to respect one another. But the truth is, there are a shit load of bad parents and terrible adults out there who left their kids with a million questions and even more insecurities. And there are few things worse than confused and angry kids who grow into adults. 

Here’s a quick story: 
Recently, I was sitting on my couch when my phone rang. It was a random number that I didn’t recognize. Normally, I wouldn’t answer but I guess I was feeling especially adventurous that evening. This is something how that conversation went down.

Chris: Hello?
Unknow Caller: Is this Chris?
C: Yes? Who is this?
UC: Wait, like Hey Chris? *background giggling*
C: *Heavy sigh* I suppose. Can I help you?
UC: Did you know you’re a faggot?
At this point my eyes light up. Whereas, years ago I would have snapped and began screaming, I was almost delighted to have the opportunity to actually talk to my bully. The following is not verbatim, but went down something similar to this:
C: Holy shit, I wish I was. I would be out banging many dudes instead of sitting here on this couch playing Call of Duty. 
UC: *More giggling and whispering* So you wish you were a faggot?
C: Do I know you? Will you tell me who you are or if we have ever met?
UC: Fuck you, faggot. 
C: Yeah, that’s what I figured. See, you know who I am and since you have my phone number, which is significantly more difficult that finding my address, I find it odd that you wouldn’t just come over and say these things to me instead of hiding behind an anonymous phone call. 
UC: Your dad molested you. Did you like that you faggot?
This took me aback. I get called a “faggot” every Cubs season, but this person knew enough about me to have either read my books or my blog to some extent. But it only shook me for a two-count. 
C: What I find tragic, is that you’re such a coward that you couldn’t ever say these things to my face. In fact, my address is easy to find. I openly invite you and everyone in the room with you to stop my my apartment right now or at any time of the day to say this to me. But because I know you won’t, I want to tell you a little about you. See, I might not know who you are specifically, but I know you. Strong and compassionate motherfuckers wouldn’t call someone and mock their sexual abuse. I have known cowards like you my entire life and I know people like you turn into vapid and insignificant losers that no one loves because you don’t love yourself because if you did, you wouldn’t have made this call. 
UC: *Mumbling and covering up the phone* I still think you’re a faggot.
C: We’ll that’s all fine and good but I want to see if you can come up with something better. Bring it. You got me on the phone, I want to hear the worst of what you can say to me. Here’s your opportunity. I will even stay quiet and listen to you.
UC: Faggot!
C: You’re blowing your chance, man. Here I am. Do your worst.
UC: *click*


For every one of you who has had to stand and take it - who didn’t have the words at the time and went home and replayed the events over and over in your head while staying awake well into the early AM - you made it. For every one of you that kept your head up or didn’t let the tears fall until you were well out of ear-shot - you made it because you are one tough motherfucker. And for every last one of you who took the punches, got up, dusted yourself off, and smiled because you knew you were better than those motherfuckers - you are my heroes. 

That thick skin is what got you here so don’t let those fuckers win by forcing you to put up a wall. Leave it down. Because a bully is driven by jealousy and their sole desire is to stomp out the love they see in your heart. So leave your heart open as a giant “fuck you” to everyone who thought they could take you out because most people in this world are good people and they shouldn’t be punished by the actions of a handful of shitty people with bad parents.
Because the biggest “fuck you” to those insecure assholes is a smile, two swear fingers, and a tough motherfucking heart. 

And if whoever called me is reading this:

644 W Wrightwood Ave. 
Chicago, Illinois  60614

anonymous asked:

I don't think Tom is disrespectful to Emma at all. What's he supposed to talk about that topic? There was NOTHING. A ten-year-old was a bit into him, he said she was only a friend and waited until the crush faded, and it eventually did and everything was probably fine between them. It was a one-sided crush in his childhood. He's now an adult in a serious long-term relationship and he and jade are constantly asked, blamed harassed about something that happened at 12. I would be a bit annoyed too

Here

guessineedaurl  asked:

Timestamp for "Oh how happy we'll be" prompt: sunrise. Thanks!

Original fic!


The second time Bellamy goes to the beach, it’s almost nothing like the first.

Well, okay, it’s similar in a lot of ways. He’s going to the same beach and the same house, and he’s going with Clarke. But it doesn’t feel the same. It’s only been three months since that first visit, but his entire life has been upended in that time.

It’s not just Clarke; it might not even primarily be Clarke. Not that she isn’t a huge, amazing, wonderful change. She’s up there in the best things that have ever happened to him, he’s pretty sure, which feels weird to think about. Most of his positive life events have been humans, but it feels odd to think about them in those terms. Octavia’s birth is the most important thing that’s ever happened to him, but she’s a person, not a plot point.

It’s something he’s reminded himself of a lot, in the last three months. Just because Octavia feels like the fulcrum on which his existence turns, it doesn’t mean she is, or that she should be. She doesn’t owe him that. And–she’s going to be happy.

That’s all he’s ever wanted for her. But it’s still a change, and a huge one.

One he’s not confident he would have gotten through without Clarke. Not in a bad way; he hasn’t been leaning on her, he doesn’t think. Mostly, it just gives him something to do aside from from fret about how she’s doing. He has a new girlfriend to focus on, and that’s great.

It’s her idea to go back to the beach. It’s not for long, just for the long weekend at Labor Day. He’s between summer and fall semesters and has spent the rest of his break stressing out about how to redo all of his lesson plans based on his experiences in the summer term. Which wouldn’t be bad, except he’s done it about a thousand times, and if he does it any more, he’s probably going to give himself an aneurysm.

Clarke suggested the beach, and found flights cheap enough that even he didn’t mind flying instead of driving. When you’re only going for a weekend, driving for fifteen hours just doesn’t work, honestly.

And there’s something weirdly exciting about flying with Clarke. About taking a trip with her, just her.

So, yeah. Watching Clarke unlock the beach house, it feels completely different.

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