vulkan lives

Alternate Horus Heresy Book Titles

Horus Rising: All Those Hot Men and that Shady Guy

False Gods: Poor Horus I Knew That Guy Was Shady!

Galaxy in Flames: Poor Tarik

Flight of the Eisenstien: Poor Garro

Fulgrim: We Aren’t as Gay as Everyone Thinks

Decent of Angels: Here He Is, the Biggest Douche

Legion: I am Alpharius pt. 1

Battle for the Abyss: Loyal People You Don’t Care About Much

Mechanicum: Machine Guys About Half the Fandom Cares About

Tales of Heresy: Great Short Stories, Because we Publish our Fan Fiction

Fallen Angels: Luther Has Had Enough of the Biggest Douche

Thousand Sons: Not Really a Thousand till the Very End

Nemesis: 600 Pages of We Knew You’d Lose

The First Heretic: The Ultimate Heartbreak Story

Prospero Burns: Ugh Let’s Rewrite Thousand Sons

Age of Darkness: MOAR FAN FICTION

The Outcast Dead: More Pointless Fluff Sprinkled with Astartes and Rogal Dorn

Deliverance Lost: I am Alpharius pt. 2

Known No Fear: Ultramarines get Screwed

The Primarchs: Love dat Photo Op on the Front

Fear To Tread: Hey, Can We Rip You Heart Out Again?

Shadows Of Treachery: We Need Money so Here Read our Gush

Angel Extermanitus: Perturabo Can See your Bullcrap Fulgrim

Betrayer: Angron the Totally Justified Heretic

Vulkan Lives: Torture, and No More Sympathy for Psycho Batman!

The Unremembered Empire: This Title is a Huge Joke

Scars: Got scars?

Sources for art & quotes used in the Primarch Quote series.

Lion El'Jonson

  • Quote: The Unremembered Empire, Chapter 14
  • Artwork: Fallen Angels, Neil Roberts

Fulgrim

  • Quote: The Unremembered Empire, Chapter 10
  • Artwork: The Primarchs, Neil Roberts

Perturabo

  • Quote: Angel Exterminatus, Chapter 5
  • Artwork: Angel Exterminatus, Neil Roberts

Jaghatai Khan

  • Quote: Scars, Episode VII
  • Artwork: Brotherhood of the Storm, Neil Roberts

Leman Russ

  • Quote: Warhammer 40,000: Rogue Trader, page 76
  • Artwork: Prospero Burns, Neil Roberts

Rogal Dorn

  • Quote: The Unremembered Empire, Chapter 21
  • Artwork: The Primarchs, Neil Roberts

Konrad Curze

  • Quote: White Dwarf #260, page 63
  • Artwork: Prince of Crows, Neil Roberts

Sanguinius

  • Quote: Fear To Tread, Chapter 19
  • Artwork: Fear To Tread, Neil Roberts

Ferrus Manus

  • Quote: The Primarchs, Feat of Iron, Chapter 3
  • Artwork: The Damnation of Pythos, Neil Roberts

Angron

  • Quote: Betrayer, Chapter 17
  • Artwork: Tales of Heresy, Neil Roberts

Roboute Guilliman

  • Quote: Know No Fear, Ushkul//Thu, Chapter 2
  • Artwork: The Unremembered Empire, Neil Roberts

Mortarion

  • Quote: Scars, Episode XII
  • Artwork: Galaxy in Flames,Neil Roberts

Magnus the Red

  • Quote: A Thousand Sons, Chapter 20
  • Artwork: A Thousand Sons, Neil Roberts

Horus Lupercal

  • Quote: Galaxy in Flames, Chapter 12
  • Artwork: Vengeful Spirit, Neil Roberts

Lorgar Aurelian

  • Quote: Horus Rising, Quote section
  • Artwork: Betrayer, Neil Roberts

Vulkan

  • Quote: The Primarchs, Feat of Iron, Wrath of Iron
  • Artwork: Vulkan Lives, Neil Roberts

Corvus Corax

  • Quote: Deliverance Lost, Chapter 18
  • Artwork: Deliverance Lost, Neil Roberts

Alpahrius

  • Quote: Legion, Quote section
  • Artwork: Legion, Neil Roberts
Vulkan Lives

ark-of-eden

I don’t think it’s an unpopular opinion. I know there are other people who dislike other books more, as much because of personal pet peeves as because they just never bothered to read it, but VL was so, so disappointing to me.

See, I loved Nick Kyme’s Tome of Fire trilogy. I love Vulkan, easily one of the most underrepresented Primarchs in 40K. I wanted to know what happened to Vulkan after Isstvan V SO BAD. I trusted Kyme to write something fantastic, to tell us about Vulkan’s childhood perhaps!

What I got was a book that felt like he was lifting pieces of other Primarchs’ backstories and attributing them to Vulkan. The Salamanders nearly dying out before they found their Primarch? Magnus’ Legion. Getting into an altercation with Konrad over something he did? Taken wholesale from The Dark King. Being “the strongest Primarch”? Oh gee, I wonder how many different Primarchs this has been attributed to?

Everything involving Konrad and Vulkan was gross torture porn and it was, depressingly, the most ‘original’ part of that story. Oh, and we have the reprisal of John Grammaticus, that no one wanted. We have a bunch of characters that I think were supposed to live? Die. At least one of them.

The afterword was particularly insulting. “No one knows what happened to Vulkan”. YES WE FUCKING DO. YOU KNOW BECAUSE YOU WROTE ABOUT IT. THIS IS BULLSHIT. WHY DID I PAY 17$ AND STAY UP UNTIL 3 AM READING THIS?!

AAAAAAAAAAA

The worst part, personally, was that I had a story about Vulkan drafted out, but I put it aside because I thought that Kyme would do such a better job than I ever could that it wasn’t even worth writing to be Joss’d. Ahahahahah no.

Unremembered Empire *attempts* to fix what Kyme broke, but it’s one of those things I just pretend never, ever happened.