voldemorts nose

Hedwig Plot Twist:

In the final battle Voldemort and Harry cast their final spells….then out of no where Hedwig comes flying down, looking like a crazed bird with missing feathers and dirt all over her, knocks into Voldemort’s head causing him to lose concentration, and drops a howler that opens up to yell:
“NOT MY BLOODY HUMAN YOU NOSELESS TWIT! p.s. Harry dear so sorry I’m late I had a hell of a time getting here.”

how desperate
  • Voldemort: So I just have to lie??
  • Pinocchio: Yup

Carl the Animator: “What happened to the rest of her nose?”

Ted the Animator: “Oh, y’know, that style was all the rage in the ‘70s.”

Carl the Animator: “…really?”

Ted the Animator: “No.”

Carl the Animator: “Ok, good… I had a feeling Voldemort was never truly fashionable.”

Harry: well, we have something voldermort doesn’t have

Ron: and what’s that??

Hermione: love??

Harry: you’re supposed to be smart Hermione love ain’t gonna help win a war

Draco: we got a nose