viorst

It is true love because
I put on eyeliner and a concerto and make pungent observations about the great issues of the day
Even when there’s no one here but him,
And because
I do not resent watching the Green Bay Packers
Even though I am philosophically opposed to football,
And because
When he is late for dinner and I know he must be either having an affair or lying dead in the middle of the street,
I always hope he’s dead.

It’s true love because
If he said quit drinking martinis but I kept drinking them and the next morning I couldn’t get out of bed,
He wouldn’t tell me he told me,
And because
He is willing to wear unironed undershorts
Out of respect for the fact that I am philosophically opposed to ironing,
And because
If his mother was drowning and I was drowning and he had to choose one of us to save,
He says he’d save me.

It’s true love because
When he went to San Francisco on business while I had to stay home with the painters and the exterminator and the baby who was getting the chicken pox,
He understood why I hated him,
And because
When I said that playing the stock market was juvenile and irresponsible and then the stock I wouldn’t let him buy went up twenty-six points,
I understood why he hated me,
And because
Despite cigarette cough, tooth decay, acid indigestion, dandruff, and other features of married life that tend to dampen the fires of passion,
We still feel something
We can call
True love.

—  Judith Viorst, “True Love”

Maybe they couldn’t fit “Self-Induced” on the cover.

5 Classic Children’s Books With Horrible Hidden Messages

#5. Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day Preaches the Worst Kind of Entitled Fatalism

Most of Alexander’s issues are entirely his fault. He wakes up with gum in his hair – maybe you should stop chewing gum in bed, Alex. He trips on his skateboard that he left on the floor – pick up your shit, Alex. His teacher likes his friend’s picture better than his – because Alexander didn’t draw anything. Draw something, Alex.

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A live-action movie based on Judith Viorst’s 1972 hit children’s Alexander And The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day (Atheneum)has just been picked up by Disney, according toDeadline. It will be directed by Lisa Cholodenko (The Kids Are All Right) from a script she wrote with Rob Lieber (Septimus Heap: Magyk). Steve Carrell is set to star as Alexander’s father.

Not sure how I feel about this one.

WNDB Summer Reading Series

If you liked Judith Viorst’s Alexander, Who’s Not (Do you hear me? I mean it!) Going to Move read Jane Bahk and Felicia Hoshino’s Juna’s Jar because both feature young children facing the difficult challenges of losing friends due to family moves.

Read more about Juna’s Jar at Smithsonian Book Dragon.

~~*VSFW*~~

Imagine, if you will, a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day a la Alexander and Judith Viorst. When you woke up, your head was absolutely splitting and your alarm clock seemed much shriller than usual. The toast burnt. You tripped walking down the sidewalk and ripped a hole in your jeans. Someone even spilled hot coffee on your white shirt.
By the end of the day, curled up on the sofa, you just wanted to crawl into your bed and never come out again. When the doorbell rang, you were in no mood to answer it, let alone let anyone into your apartment, but the ringing continued and the voices outside were getting a little louder, though still unrecognizable. You weren’t expecting a pile of twelve boys to come crashing into you when you flung the door open with a scowl. Luhan was the first to try to explain, stumbling into your house with the rest of them. “Baekhyun said you looked like you weren’t feeling well today.”
Chanyeol continued, unable to control his mouth in the excitement. “So we all decided to come to make you feel better! There’s cake and everything!” He immediately got a rap against his head from Minseok, who intoned that the cake was supposed to be a surprise.
“We’re overwhelming her. Step back a little!” ordered Joonmyun from the side, pushing Lay forward gently to lead you back to the couch with a soft, dimpled grin while Jongin and Sehun brought out extra-big slices of cake for everyone, courtesy of Kyungsoo. Seated comfortably between the two imposing bodyguard figures of Tao and Kris, you finally started to relax again.
Seeing these boys all wrapped around you in comfort and support, Jongdae’s laughter rising above their heads, you started to rethink the final verdict on today. All previous evidence to the contrary, right now you only felt an excess of love and friendship.

- Admin J

Happy Valentine’s Day!