i learned the best thing the other day in rehearsal: at the end of the first movement of beethoven 7, all of the strings are playing some type of chromatic passage. in the violin 1, violin 2, cello, and bass parts, the notes are marked d, c ♯, b ♯. yet, in the viola part, the notes are marked d, c ♯, c ♮. beethoven’s reason for doing this? he thought the violists wouldn’t understand the b ♯.

tl;dr — even beethoven made viola jokes

Theater kids nailing “no food or drink” signs all over “their” performing arts building: we make the rules

Choir kids exploiting 3 loopholes, slirping down cup noodles in the bathroom so the teachers won’t see them: we’re the reason for the rules

Orchestra kids lying in the middle of the hallway right in font of the “no food or drink” signs with pizza and soda: the rules don’t apply to us

highlights from volunteering at a music camp
  • “is that…spit…”
  • “my orchestra teacher has a broken cello that is beyond repair and we use it as a bathroom pass.”
  • “do you ever get a headache from playing the piccolo?”
  • 1. “why are perfect intervals perfect?” 2. “because the church said so”
  • “oh my god are you trying to make your e string sound so squeaky??” (quote from a trumpet player)
  • “here is my duet for solo violin, opus 1″
  • 1. “you guys are learning this piece a lot quicker than the younger group.” 2. “did it take the younger group 30 minutes to learn it?” 1. “it took 30 minutes to explain what d sharp is.”
  • “you know violins, if you don’t like your e strings you can switch to viola and you’ll never have to worry about it again” (a quote that my conductor says nearly every time the violins tune)
  • “it’s actually really satisfying to destroy (unplayable) instruments. I knew someone who ran over an instrument with their car on purpose. it was by a park, and all of the non-musicians were saying ‘noooo!!!’ while all the orchestra teachers were laughing evilly”
  • *the sound of ten violins putting enough bow weight on their strings to produce that awful strained scratching sound*
  • *the sound of ten second violins playing c flarp*
  • “as a volunteer I should tell you not to fold your sheet music into a paper airplane but I can’t stop you if I don’t see you doing it”
  • 1. (the violin coach) “I ask my students to practice about 3 hours.” 2. (one of the campers) “what? 3 hours a day?” 1. “no, 3 hours a week. when I was a music major I did 3 hours a day.” 2. “WHATT??”
  • 1. “why do you have a plastic saxophone?” 2. “because it’s the only instrument I’m good at.”