viking meme

If Vikings had memes
  • I want Freya to break into my house and use her falcon cloak to strangle me, killing me instantly
  • The Lokasenna but every time someone is kinkshamed it gets faster
  • Self-care is putting your hand inside a giant wolf’s mouth
  • Wake Brynhildr up (Wake Brynhildr up inside)
  • “Girls are so hot. Guys are so hot. Why is everybody so hot?” “It’s Ragnarok, and Surtur’s already fucking shit up”
  • Date a boy who thinks goats make wonderful pets
  • Are you a Frigg wlw or a Fulla wlw
  • “Are you a man or a woman?” “I’m Loki” “No, I mean, what’s your gender?” “Mischief” “Ok, but what’s between your legs?” “Sigyn, generally. Or Angrboda. Or Svadilfari. Or Odin, that one time…”
  • Brace yourself: Fimbulvetr is coming
  • Njord: *takes a deep breath* I lo-
    Skadi: yes, you love the sea, I know, you love the sea so much, it’s the light of your life, you love it so much, you just love the sea, I KNOW, you love the sea you fucking love the sea ok I know, I get it, YOU LOVE the sea. I GET IT.                                                              
  • “don’t talk to me or my eight-legged foal ever again” 
  • Mani: *currently engaged in a flame war over mooncourse with Artemis*
  • Odin: *disguised as a harmless old wanderer* A buddy of mine saw Odin take his shirt off in the shower and he said that Odin has an eight pack, that Odin is shredded
    Frigg: Your friend’s a liar, Odin is a punk bitch

                  Vikings; The Great Army sentence meme!

❛ That is my knife ❜
❛ You are crazy! ❜
❛ Father gave me this knife! ❜
❛ I will kill ___  with it. I will kill ___ with ___ knife ❜
❛ That’s enough! ❜
❛ Give it to me!  ❜
❛ We have important decisions to make ❜
❛ As usual you must tell us how to behave! ❜
❛ I wish ____  was here ❜
❛ Hopefully he will be home soon ❜
❛ I’m listening.  Say something .. interesting
❛ That is the message that he wanted me to bring to you ❜
❛ There he is .. the voice of reason. I hate reason ❜
❛ How do we overcome that when we have never attempted anything like that before? ❜
❛ We raise a great army. An army bigger than ever before ❜
❛ In the name of our dead father. In the name of ____  the greatest hero of our country. And in the name of ____ . We declare war on the whole world ❜
❛ When we return,  ___ and I, and our brothers. We will have to avenge our father’s death ❜
❛ You will not be welcomed for what you did to all of us, and I would have to kill you ❜
❛ Will you come with us? ❜
❛ I also have a reason to stay here ❜
❛ I know what your father would have wanted me to do ❜
❛ I do not trust him ❜
❛ You should look to improve your own security ❜
❛ If the Gods don’t protect me, then who can? ❜
❛ It’s good that we have met, ___, we need ambitious men ❜
❛ I still have a bone to pick with you ❜
❛ Why were you silent when I demanded justice from ___ ❜
❛ We have different memories of Mother ❜
❛ He/She had eyes only for you, and for ___. To me she/he was cold and distant ❜
❛ So you feel sorry for yourself? Poor, little ___ ❜
❛ I’m telling you the truth. I have a very good reason not to feel so angry with ___ ❜
❛ What kind of a son are you? ❜
❛ What does it matter what your ___ did to you? He/She was still your ___ ❜
❛ Are you just really sad she can’t breastfeed you anymore? ❜
❛ Whoever would have thought that you two are brothers? ❜
❛ I promise you, we are already well prepared for any incursions into our kingdom ❜
❛ I am not sure you realize the scale of their possible retribution ❜
❛ We are fully prepared ❜
❛ I have no wish or need to be allied to such a degenerate monarch ❜
❛ As for you, ___ , you may enjoy the aridities of heaven without my discomforting presence, and that of every woman whose only crime was a desire to be free ❜
❛ I know what I have to do ❜
❛ Us?  You are no longer a part of us, ___. ❜
❛ What is ‘us’ ___  is changing. Only you won’t accept it ❜
❛ Too much bad blood, ___ ❜
❛ Once a betrayer, always a betrayer ❜
❛ You came back to us. Thank God. Truly, thank God ❜
❛ You will have to be free in order to marry one of us ❜
❛ I can see that you are bored already ❜
❛ One day, you may be King. I hope so with all my heart ❜
❛ You need to drink more wine ❜
❛ Now, you keep saying you understand. But you obviously don’t ❜
❛ Don’t ever let yourself be influenced by other people. Specially people like me. Always have your own thoughts and act on them ❜

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                                     Vikings; Revenge

❛ We have to ask the Gods for their help ❜
❛ We have to prepare sacrifices ❜
❛ What shall we sacrifice? ❜
❛ If the army fails; If they are defeated by ____  our people might never recover ❜
❛ I think ____  mean(s) ‘who shall we sacrifice?’
❛ I want to ask you something ❜
❛ Are you saying he wanted you to be our leader? ❜
❛ What? What? ❜
❛ That was the woman who made me believe I have to be King of all ____ in order to marry me ❜
❛ I think of ____ everyday of my life ❜
❛ ____ wants to lead the army ❜
❛ ____ should lead the army! ❜
❛ What did you say to ____ ? ❜
❛ I told ____ that I’ve always loved ____ ❜
❛ I’m surprised to see you ❜
❛ You saw me but you didn’t bother come to say hello ❜
❛ I wanted to marry you. You turned me down. I wasn’t important enough for you ❜
❛ Everything I have done, I have done for you, and the Gods! ❜
❛ Please don’t kill me. Please ❜
❛ You know the rules of the race, ____ , you have to serve the feast ❜
❛ It is you that is not happy, ____ ❜
❛ Something happened to you in ____ and you have not been the same ❜
❛ It’s a truth. I just don’t know what the truth is ❜
❛ You have seen all you needed to? ❜
❛ They are not as safe and secure as they think they are ❜
❛ Go and make your plans. We wait to hear of your success ❜
❛ You should have killed ____  when you had the chance ❜
❛ I love all of our Gods. All of them. But I only love two people; you, my ____, and ____ ❜
❛ If I decide not to kill ____ then no one can ❜
❛ I don’t think it’s fair that I should keep ____ to myself. It doesn’t seem right ❜
❛ I know you two like each other. I can see ❜
❛ You are talking about sharing me. How can you not be jealous? ❜
❛ Tonight you will die and feast with the Gods ❜
❛ I hope that was enjoyable, otherwise is not worth it ❜
❛ This is my decision! ❜
❛ We are all equally ____, but we are not equal in battle. So I will take the lead. I will establish the battle plans and I will give the orders, do you understand that? ❜
❛ You don’t agree ____ ? ❜
❛ I didn’t say anything ❜
❛ Your age makes you believe you know more than you do ❜
❛ What have you done? ❜
❛ What battles have you won? And what battles have you lost? ❜
❛ It is in failure, my ____, that is when we learn the most ❜
❛ You don’t want to listen, that is your choice ❜
❛ I am the leader of this great army. Me! And you will obey me! ❜
❛ I was about to receive the body and blood from Christ, our savior ❜
❛ Thank you. Now get out! ❜
❛ You should have listened to me ❜
❛ Most of my life you’ve either manipulated, or humiliated me. You used me to fulfill your ambition ❜
❛ What kind of a father are you? ❜
❛ You’re not behaving like a King anymore ❜

❛ How the little pigs will grunt when they hear how the old boar suffered ❜
❛ How much gold and silver do you want to spare my life? ❜
❛ Name your price. Anything ❜
❛ My father was worth more than gold and silver. That is not the price you must pay ❜
❛ I’ve been told your God is a carpenter and guess what? So am I ❜