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I used to be a Kpop Fan ( sorry if it's too long )

I don’t remember exactly how old I was when I first discovered Kpop. It was between 5-6 years ago. At that time I was a high school student. 

I was at my best friend’s house stalking a cute tumblr famous Vietnamese hottie from New Jersey. He posted a link of Taeyang’s Wedding Dress.

I clicked the link and me and my friend instantly fell in love with Taeyang. His voice, his body, his face and cute Asian eyes. At that time my spark for yellow fever was just beginning.

After that day, my friend and I became Asian boy obsessed specifically Korean. We got into Kpop and Kdramas and everything else in between. 

I dreamed of the day that I would visit Korea and bump into G Dragon and experienced a love at first sight moment. 

But, I came to realize that would never happen. I lived in a very predominately Hispanic and African-American area. No Koreans here but, that all changed in college.

I attended a community college in my city. About a 45 minute drive from where I lived. There I shared my classes with cute Asians guys. Sadly none where Korean. They were Filipino,Vietnamese, Chinese,Thai, Malaysian and Indonesian. I at that moment decided that I would have to settle for any Asian guy but I so longed to be married to a Korean.

I joined Kakaotalk during my first year in community college in hopes to meet a Korean guy. Sadly, I did not . I did however met a whole bunch of unnies and dongsaengs who loved Kpop.

After that I deleted Kakaotalk a couple of times. In the summer of 2012 I downloaded Kakaotalk once again and Kakaostory as well. I could not believe how many Koreans used Kakaostory! I instantly became Kakao famous. All the Koreans pointed out my big eyes, small face and white skin. I was for once in my life famous. I felt beautiful.

Reality is that I am not. I am short, with big thighs and butt. I have dry hair, huge dark circles, acne prone skin and overweight.

I stared at my computer skin crying that even if I did ever visit Korea I will never be tall,thin and pretty like any of those Kpop girl groups.

In the winter of 2013 I met a guy through Kakaostory. He is not handsome. He looks far from a Korean boy group member but, overtime I fell in love. He asked me to be his gf and so I said yes.

At that time I was in a very confusing part of my life. Online relationships are hard. Not to mention he lived in the other side of the world! I am Latina and he is Korean. Nothing made sense at that time but for once I was happy. It felt like a dream. I don’t think a Korean guy will ever fall in love if he say me in real life. I am far from looking like a cute,innocent, long legged and straight eyebrows Korean girl. If anything, I am quite the opposite!


I am now married to that same Korean guy whom I met in Kakaostory.  I will soon turn 22 and I put my studies to a halt. I no longer listen to Kpop or fantasize about any Korean idols well because I am married now. I enjoy listening to EDM and Indie Rock now. Truth is that I have never been happier in my life! Kpop was making me feel worthless and depressed when I should never have! I don’t need to adhere to Korea’s ideals for a Korean guy to find me interesting. I just need to be me and so do you!

Anyways, Korea is nice country and the food is amazing! I had a huge culture shock during my stay! One thing I can’t get over is how nice people are ALWAYS dressed. How all girls are in full makeup and heels all the time. I know I can’t ever be like that but, that’s ok! Oh and not everyone looks like a Kpop idol. Not everyone is stick thin either! While most people are thin they are a few that are not. Koreans come in all shapes and sizes! 

I hope my post will make you realize that you don’t have to starve yourself or bleach your skin just to adhere to your idol’s ideals. I hope you realize that more than likely you will not marry him or her either. You will fall in love with someone completely different. Trust me! 

By the way , Korean music and dramas are not all there is to enjoy in the world!!! Don’t listen to Kpop for day and give something else a try! It’s okay to not like all the songs from your favorite bands and it’s okay if you don’t like all the members. What idols portray on TV is not 100% them. They are not innocent angels! Chances are they are no longer virgins, like to enjoy nights at the clubs and are dating a non celeb. 

I hope I made you appreciate yourself more and lighted up a spark in you to take Kpop a bit less seriously. Kpop is meant to enjoy not to add stress tp your life.