victim blaming

refinery29.com
High School Suspended A Student Who Reported Sexual Assault

The 14-year-old girl was assaulted in the stairwell of Eastern High School in Lansing, MI, on October 13, 2015. The incident was caught on security cameras, which reportedly show a 14-year-old male student following the girl into the stairwell before exposing himself. The video also shows him grabbing her hand and forcing her to touch his exposed penis.

The assault was first reported by the perpetrator, who feared that the girl’s boyfriend would attack him. According to prosecutors, the boy was charged and pleaded guilty in March to one misdemeanor count of indecent exposure.

But before the boy was arrested and charged, Eastern High School officials approached the sexual assault survivor. The girl told them that her classmate had groped her and tried to force her to perform oral sex.

The lawsuit claims that after reviewing security footage from the stairwell, school administrators determined that the video did not support her version of events. The lawsuit says that when the girl did not retract her statement, she was suspended from school.

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Hey Guys, Amber Rose started a campaign against slut shaming, victim blaming and sexual violence. The name of the movement is #AmberRoseSlutWalk.

Here is their website  and here can you donate to the cause. 

It is really a great campaign, you should check it out!

So I am absolutely fuming. A few weeks ago, I was called to the dean’s office to discuss the antisemitic bullying I’ve been enduring since freshman year (I’m a senior now). Here’s a brief run down of some of what I’ve had to suffer through these last three years (this doesn’t even scratch the surface):

• A swastika carved into my desk, along with the words “ich haße juden” ie “I hate Jews” in German
• Intentionally spit on, usually accompanied by the word k*ke, the most vile word a Jewish person can be called
• Pushed into lockers/to the ground
• Called a “dirty Jew” more times than I can count, usually once a day

I identified the main perpetrator by name. There is proof he is a Nazi as he has a fucking swastika tattoo on his arm for everyone to see. Close after I went to the dean, the boy I accused was called to the dean. He denied everything, and received NO punishment.

I have several witnesses to these events, he is very vocal about being a Nazi, and he is the head of a neo-Nazi gang that is very active on campus. And the administration did NOTHING. I want everyone to know that antisemitism is alive and thriving, and affects Jews everywhere every day, and the world does not care. The world remains silent.

If there’s anything more pernicious than the notion that one ought to be ennobled by one’s suffering, it’s the notion that not being ennobled by one’s suffering represents a personal moral deficit.

Like, okay, my horrible trauma unaccountably failed to transfigure me into a saint, and somehow that’s my fault?

Respectability politics are garbage,pass it on.

No matter how many non-dysphoric trans people,otherkin,genderfluid people,or neopronoun users you throw under the bus and blame for “trans people not being taken seriously”…

Cis people aren’t gonna stop making “mayo isn’t a gender” or “rock-kin!1!1!1!1″ or “trigender pyrofox from the forest planet jokes”.

Because surprise! Cis people have never needed a “good” reason to hate us.

Not that there are ever any.

Pass that on too.

There is never a good reason to hate trans people.

[Looting rhetoric] is victim blaming which says inanimate objects ought to become the center of discussion and outrage surrounding the death of a living, breathing, vibrant human being, and that never should we mention the white supremacist institution which murdered him or the cop(s) who pulled the trigger.

A while back I tweeted that the most powerful weapon to destroy a people’s resistance is to erase their history. For the phenomenon that is victim blaming, this is absolutely essential. If people (read mostly white people) can erase an oppressed population’s history, they effectively erase the oppression they themselves committed and make invisible the power they obtain from it.

“Looting” rhetoric is a method of erasing the previous violence and oppression visited upon Ferguson’s black community, specifically the killing of Mike Brown, but also even before it. This rhetoric conveniently rejects greater sociopolitical, economic, and historical context for the sake of bolstering itself and in doing so it can dismiss the continuation of white supremacy in contemporary institutions (like police departments).

The mentally ill literally aren’t allowed to have anything. They aren’t allowed to have their emotions, they aren’t allowed to have their struggles, they aren’t allowed to have their life views. BUT THE PEOPLE AROUND THE MENTALLY ILL OH THINK OF HOW THEY FEEL HAVING TO DEAL WITH THAT ALL THE TIME. IT MUST BE SO HARD ON THE PEOPLE AROUND THAT PERSON STRUGGLING WITH THEIR ILLNESS.

Victim Blaming 2.0

Dear Tumblr,

I received an ask about this, so here we go. 

Things that ARE victim blaming:

- “its your fault”

- “how could you do this to me/us”

- “You brought this on yourself by doing [x]”

- punishing the victim for being a victim

Things that are NOT victim blaming:

- safety tips for preventing a crime (this includes lists of areas and activities to avoid/take a friend if you’re going there)

- teaching self defense or encouraging the teaching of self defense

- requiring proof of a crime in order to prosecute

- doubting a crime was committed in the absence of evidence

- being angry at being lied to

There is a massive difference between being a victim and playing the victim. Telling you to watch out for yourself, or ignoring the claims of a proven liar, is not victim blaming. You cannot victim blame someone who is not a victim. 

Lea

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Lundy Bancroft on Domestic Violence in Popular Culture, Part 2.

Lundy has twenty years of experience specializing in interventions for abusive men and their families. He has also authored many other book chapters and scholarly articles. Lundy is a former Co-Director of Emerge, the nation’s first counseling program for men who batter. He has worked with over a thousand abusers directly as an intervention counselor, and has served as clinical supervisor on another thousand cases. He has also served extensively as a custody evaluator, child abuse investigator, and expert witness in domestic violence and child abuse cases. Lundy appears across the United States as a presenter for judges and other court personnel, child protective workers, therapists, law enforcement officials, and other audiences.

Lundy Bancroft is an author, workshop leader, and consultant on domestic abuse and child maltreatment. His work focuses on three areas: 1) Training professionals on best practices for intervening with male perpetrators of violence against women, toward the goal of promoting accountability and requiring change, 2) Training professionals on the dynamics of emotional injury and recovery in children who are exposed to a man who abuses their mother, to prepare participants to offer the most effective and safe assistance possible to children and their mothers, and 3) Supporting healing and empowerment for abused women, with an emphasis on advocating for the human rights of mothers and their children.

Lundy is the author of four books in the field, including

Lundy is available as a public speaker and trainer for professionals, and offers weekend retreats for women who have experienced abuse. - (x)

When You Try and Bring Up Hurtful or Abusive Behaviour, Do They Immediately Turn It Around and Play the Victim?

Gaslighting Is a Common Victim-Blaming Abuse Tactic – Here Are 4 Ways to Recognize It in Your Life by Kris Nelson

Another way to manipulate someone into thinking that they’re not experiencing harm or abuse is to constantly turn the conversation towards the abuser, making it seem like you are doing harm by even bringing up what’s hurting you.

If someone in your life cannot (or will not) let you speak to your experiences, and instead insists on turning it into a conversation about themselves, the conversation is not a healthy one.


Some red flag phrases for this tactic are:

“You always make me out to be the bad guy.”

“Constantly bringing stuff like this up makes me feel bad/is hurtful to me.”

“I’m actually the one hurting.”

“You don’t know what abuse is. Saying that I’m abusive is hurtful to me.”

“Pretending I’m hurtful/abusive makes you the bully.”


If these phrases are a constant in your life, if you feel like you’ve been conditioned into mistrusting your own memories and experiences, you have most likely been the victim of gaslighting.