veronica mars season 1

10

OK, so I’ve been rewatching my favorite LoVe moments from the show and this is the one I love so freaking much. This was the moment I went from thinking it would be cool if the snarky, snarly duo hooked up to becoming a rabid and irrational LoVe shipper (a state that lasted me close to a decade, it seems).

Sure, I’ve always been a sucker for hurt/comfort, but I think the reason I get nearly as incoherent now when I rewatch it, as I was the first time I’ve seen it years ago, is that Logan, who hides underneath either quips or rage, so utterly lets go of any camouflage and just breaks down completely. Even when we saw him in that shrink’s office talking about Lily, he was contained. But here he is just - gone. And it’s almost as shocking to me as a viewer as it was to Veronica. And that fact that even at this stage in their relationship (antagonism slowly morphing into tentative friendship), he subconsciously knows he will be safe with her - that he can break down like that with her. And of course, this really brings to the forefront Logan’s capacity to feel deeply - whether it’s grief or love, a lot of Logan’s issues and most problematic behavior stem from the fact that he feels too much and has not been given proper coping mechanisms. Only someone who could love another utterly could fall apart so completely at that person’s loss.

And Veronica. Veronica who doesn’t deal well with either her own or others’ emotions at this point. And here is this boy who she has a tentative rapprochement with, who she used to be friends with, but who helped to make her life hell for the last year, and she comforts him without pause, holding him (and I love how awkward it is because he is about ten feet taller but he just crumples onto her), comforting him. Logan’s world has been upended, but so has Veronica’s, in a very different way, and if there’s one thing she understands, it’s loss.

I also think it’s this scene that finally gets Veronica fully into a ‘bygones’ mood that makes that amazing spinny kiss in 1x18 possible (even if Logan’s behavior prior to the season and early in comes back to bite him in her continuing trust issues). Their slow reconnecting helps, and so is her listening in to his shrink session (I wonder if she’d have agreed to help him if she didn’t overhear…hmmm), but I think it’s this instance.of complete vulnerability which is the final piece that gets her to see him in a new light. 

Also, the look on Veronica’s face when she hears about Logan’s abuse? I completely missed it before. I don’t think LoVe ever talk about it much (just as they don’t talk much about Veronica processing her rape - they are good at just locking things and not truly dealing with them) but Logan just finally got someone who believes him. Not someone who ignores it like his mother did, or who doesn’t believe him the way his sister did, but someone who finally finally believes him (the show is so good at painting so much with so few words, and Trina’s dismissive words about Logan 'making up tales’ about cigarette burns and broken arms, paints a picture of the Echolls home dynamics that is…no words really).