While the minimum number of bikes one should own is three, the correct number is n+1, where n is the number of bikes currently owned. This equation may also be re-written as s-1, where s is the number of bikes owned that would result in separation from your partner.

from Velominati: 

Rule #12 / The correct number of bikes to own is n+1.

Rule 7: tan lines should be cultivated and kept razor sharp.
Under no circumstances should one be rolling up their sleeves or shorts in an effort to somehow diminish one’s tan lines. Sleeveless jerseys are under no circumstances to be employed. (Velominati)
Well I’ve certainly maintained this one today!!!

I’m aware I’m burnt.

Got some new cycle friends..posted an invitation for a 120k social ride quoting velominati Frank Strack “if you are fudging your training around the weather you are off The path”, but with unexpected extreme storm and cold rain upcomming, i had no way out to than to show up as the organizer.. Found in @jobunt and @freddiesdrop other like-minded fools to ride against The storm…had to win every meter like climbing a first category col…on The way back we gladly left the KOM to others. I will never quote Frank Strack nor tell others they are off The path…today i almost landed in one of The rivers.