Every time I see @aortdn‘s “You find this funny?” comic on my dash I can’t help laughing at poor Baze, so I decided to write a little fic based on it.
After their narrow (some would say impossible) escape from Scarif it was hard for the Rogue One crew to settle in to a “normal” existence within the Alliance. There were missions, of course, and far too many close calls, but there were also periods of inactivity that each of them handled in a different way.
Chirrut Îmwe found peace by interacting with the younglings on the base. Some were children of the rebels but many more were orphans rescued from their war-torn homeworlds. They were battered in spirit if not always body and Chirrut did his best to bring a little more Light into their lives. He told jokes. He shared stories. Sometimes he even taught them moves so they could defend themselves, which served several purposes at once.
Today’s group was small but enthusiastic. He was showing them card tricks that were far more impressive since they were coming from the “blind funny man.” He recognized most of the voices in the group and several of them had seen the tricks before but still hadn’t caught on to how he managed it. He told them that the Force guided him, which was true enough. It guided him to count cards and feel for certain markings. The trick worked well on adults, too, and he’d won quite a number of credits in games. Baze called it cheating, but since they were trying to take advantage of a blind Guardian Chirrut figured it evened out.
Speaking of Baze… he tilted his head, tucking the cards into his robe as he heard the steady heavy tread of his heart’s mate. He also heard a collective intake of breath from the little ones and a whisper of “it’s The Grumbler!”
“Chirrut! There you are! I-”
The younglings screeched in alarm and there was a rapid patter of feet as Chirrut’s audience abandoned him. Most of them, anyway. He heard a soft thud as someone hit the ground in their effort to escape. Baze rushed over to help… her, judging by the tone of the screams as she struggled in his arms.
“Easy, little one,” Baze tried to soothe her. “I’ve got you now.”
Chirrut bit his lip as the girl’s panic increased. He could sense Baze’s confusion; he loved children as much as Chirrut did and just last week had spent an afternoon being mobbed by them. But that group hadn’t heard the story Chirrut had told them about The Grumbler, a terrifying creature who liked to grab children and force them to eat their vegetables.
His shoulders started to shake as the girl, he thought her name was Niri, shoved her tiny fists in Baze’s face and wailed about hating boiled guroot. Baze was trying to assure her that he didn’t care if she hated guroot he just wanted to make sure she was OK.
Unable to contain his mirth any longer Chirrut dropped to his knees and laughed until he cried.
“You find this funny?” Baze thumped his back. It only made Chirrut laugh harder. “What did you say to- OW!”
There was a muffled curse and the sound of a small body hitting the dirt again before scrambling her way to freedom.
“She bit me!” He sounded bewildered and upset, although it wasn’t directed at the girl herself. “What did you tell them, Chirrut!”
“Well!” Chirrut gasped for breath. “She may not like her vegetables but at least she isn’t afraid of a little meat!”
Baze swatted him again, calling him a variety of very bad words in the Temple language. Chirrut knew he’d feel guilty later for accidentally making the kids think his poor sweet garu-bear of a husband was a monster, but for now it was the best laugh he’d had in weeks and he was going to savor it.
10 Reasons Why Rats Are The Best Pets: 1. Easy to train to do ticks such as spinning, jumping etc 2. They are extremely fun to watch when playing with other rats!!! 3. Rats are extremely lovable. Most rats are super snugly and love pats! 4. You can give them a wide range of food. Such as popcorn, veggies, chocolate (as treats) and much more! 5. You don’t have to worry about them when you go out! You can leave them safely tucked up in their cuddly home. 6. Their individual personalities are huge!! All have their own dislikes and likes. 7. You can buy fun patterned hammocks and toys for them. 8. Usually you can get some pretty good photos of them. I love doing photo shoots with my lot. 9. Watching them be happy and popcorn around the place is so much fun! and makes you happy too! 10. They are precious souls.
I do this before every exam and I swear it helps me. Now, please note that I am an emotional wreck during exam time. Anything that can help me calm down has a good chance of benefiting stable people as well. It can be so hard to know when you’ve done all that you can do. This is my process.
1. Avoid caffeine after 5PM.
2. Stop studying at around 9PM. Make it 8PM if your exam is an early-morning one. You won’t cram any more knowledge into your poor, tired brain, and you know more than you think you do.
3. Make sure you’ve eaten. If you haven’t had dinner, do that. If you have, well done! Have something yummy with carbs and veggies. Treat yourself to something sweet if that’s your thing.
4. Take a bath or a shower and use your favourite products. Break out the Lush stuff. Use a face mask, or exfoliate your skin. Deep condition your hair. Use body lotion. All that good stuff. Brush your teeth and do your skincare. If you’re anything like me, marvel at how much better you look currently than you have in the last week.
5. Put on your favourite pyjamas. I make sure mine are clean and ready. Bonus points if you’ve found the time to change your sheets, too. Enjoy feeling like a newborn.
6. Pack your bag so you have everything you need ready in the morning. Notes, pens/spares, water, student ID, medication, campus map, etc. Give yourself one fewer thing to think about. Charge your phone. Pack yet another pen. Remember a jumper/cardigan/hoodie if your exam halls tend to get cold!
7. Read something purely for the joy of it. No notes. No textbooks. Read something you love. Start a new book. Delve into some short stories (neil-gaiman is my favourite). Take half an hour to unwind and distract your brain.
8. Set your alarm. Be asleep by 10:30PM. If you struggle, try a warm milky drink, or a hot water bottle. I sleep best when I’m cosy and these comfort me endlessly. Set a second alarm if you get paranoid about these things. Make it a little earlier than it needs to be.
Self care is always important, but during the exam period, many of us ignore it. This little routine is calming and restorative.You’re amazing. You’ve done so much already. You can definitely do this.
- pretty much all fruit and veg. favorites being apples, strawberries, grapes, and broccoli. bananas are kind of a ‘treat’.
- boca veggie burgers (70 cals) i like these better than actual hamburgers lol.
- diet microwave dinners. i have a handful of these, my favorites being 180-200 cals and are super satisfying.
- thin sliced wheat bread (60 per slice)
- yogurt cups (60-80) i also keep a huge tub of plain greek non fat yogurt in the fridge at all times to mix with my own fruit
- lean white meats like sliced turkey (so i know cal content) and chicken.
- halo top ice cream (60 per ½ cup - or 240 for the ENTIRE PINT) this stuff is so good i could cry. vanilla bean is the best flavor and you can even add in some strawberries, peaches, or bananas.
- fudgesicles (40) stops binges in their tracks
- black coffee w/ stevia. caffeine is an appetite suppressant and i genuinely LOVE coffee, the 0 cal sweetener helps too.
- lower sugar maple and brown sugar oatmeal (120) i used to eat this for breakfast everyday for MONTHS. still not tired of it lol.
- organic honey nut O’s (the same brand also has a knock off cinnamon crunch) this stuff tastes like it has peanut butter in it and is honestly better than cheerios. its pretty low cal (110 a cup; i have ¾ + ¼ non fat milk = 101 cal bowl of cereal)
im probably missing a few of my ‘staples’ but im going to stop before this gets too long lol.
Just like.. the arguments both Vegans and non-Vegans have against each other in general.
thats kinda broad so i guess ill do the ones i see most on here. well first off, vegans on here act as if veganism is super accessible. like yes there is ways veganism can be much cheaper than non veganism but its difficult to get that when u dont live near markets or really like beans and lentils and rice say. and its a different story if u mainly eat fast food bc thats much cheaper, im referring to people who buy milk and steak which are very expensive. also ppl w health problems cant always go vegan. im anemic and thought i needed meat for awhile but i found out i can get more in veggies, but i get the not being vegan bc of health problems bc i was in that boat for awhile. i have a hormonal disorder so veganism has helped w that a lot bc dairy has a lot of hormones in it. i view veganism as a personal choice
however…. theres an argument on here that is based entirely in ignorance. first off, there are a lot of annoying vegans that only care about the animals and not people. so yes, i see when people say “ok congrats on not eating meat and dairy but quinoa is extremely damaging and the people growing it are treated badly” and i agree because it is true. but… u realize… feedcrop needs to be grown by people too… and u realize the majority of the feedcrop is grown by children in countries where starving is an epidemic (83% of them iirc) and then brought over to western countries so animals in factory farms eat them.. and then we eat those animals. and i see people say “well, people picking the fruits and veggies for americans are treated awfully” and thats entirely true as well. but… non vegans eat fruits and veggies too? like i dont get the argument here bc u literally fund both? and so do workers in slaughterhouses there is literally frequent and common cases of physical and verbal abuse inside of them in america, and a large percentage of them end up with lifelong injuries that often wont be treated bc there isnt many benefits from working at a factory farm. i live near a farmers market and often buy fruits and veggies in bulk bc its much cheaper and locally grown and usually its small business and is sold by the people growing and picking them.
basically i think a lot of vegans dont give a fuck about people, and thats awful, but i hate when non vegans say shit like that bc u fund both industries. its very important to highlight vegan’s hypocritical points but if you have fruits and vegetables and meat and dairy you are funding both of these industries. as a vegan myself i believe people should eliminate as much cruelty as possible from their diets. and theres really no ethical consumption under capatalism but there IS ways to eliminate a good amount of cruelty towards both humans and animals. i look at it as a “do as much as u can” sorta thing. some people can do more than others under a variety of circumstances, i just think even a little effort can go a long way. and im not even gonna highlight the environmental damage that factory farms do. like i dont buy diamonds or eat quinoa or almonds because i want to practice what i preach and i try to buy from farmers markets and small businesses as much as i can. and once again. im not saying you have to go vegan! absolutely not. but im saying if you are funding both industries, you probably shouldnt be throwing people under the bus. you can 100% acknowledge the harm of both industries and not be vegan