vans picture

The gang’s chilling at the malt shop, as per usual. The Mystery Machine sits out front, minding its own business.

Oh noes, the bad guy appears!

He stretches out his spectacularly-long arms.

Ha, joke’s on you, bad guy! Freddy keeps the Mystery Machine locked, like any wise owner of a–

…oh.

I, uh….

Well, then.

…the real villain of this episode isn’t Mr. Hyde after all.

It’s unsafe van security practices.

So, the gang is walking back to the van, when surprise!

The bad guy is inside the Mystery Machine!

…because Fred just leaves it unlocked while they’re gone for hours!

I guess he didn’t learn from last time.

Even the monster’s expression is freakin’ perfect.

“Like, seriously, dude? You just leave it unlocked?”

“I mean, I’m an unspeakable abomination, and even *I* lock up my van during a snack run.”

FMA Manga/Brotherhood Ed: Not only will I never make a Philosopher’s Stone, I will never use one that’s already been made, even though the damage is done and can never be reversed.

I’m so disgusted by the idea of it that I would rather be eaten by Envy than attack what’s left the people of Xerxes who all but died hundreds of years ago. When I do use some of those souls to escape starving to death in a river of blood, I’m going to be wracked with guilt about it, even though it was literally the only way for me to save my friend Ling and for me to return to my brother.  

And will I use the remaining life force of a man I hate, who’s already been alive for way to long, who won’t be alive much longer, and who is offering his life up voluntarily to save the person in this world who I care about the most? Of course not! What a ridiculous idea! That would be wrong.

FMA 2003 Ed: In the end, I won’t end up murdering a whole room full of people to make a Philosopher’s Stone and save Alphonse…

..but I’m going to seriously consider it.