van cleef is a bad man


Why can’t stormtroopers shoot? There’s a bad answer and there’s a good answer.

Question: How come the good guys in Star Wars seem to hit stormtroopers without even aiming, while the stormtroopers themselves can light up an entire room without hitting anything? In the prequels, we saw that clone troopers could nail battle droids one-per-shot like they were Lee Van Cleef. What gives?

Bad Answer: It’s because stormtroopers really did suck! In fact, the heroes of the original trilogy were never in any real danger! The reason Ben Kenobi says “only Imperial stormtroopers are so precise” is because he’s a dumb old man who is confusing them with clones! After the prequel era, the Empire got cheap for some reason, hired regular schmoes to replace the clones, and skimped on their training! Sure, the Empire would pay to arm hundreds of millions of soldiers, feeding each of them three meals a day and handling all their medical care. And the Empire would pay to outfit each of them with head-to-toe body armor, including specialized armor for cold and tropical climates. But marksmanship training? That would just be silly!

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I decided to do an alignment chart with only human characters, so it was kind of a stretch for some of them but I think it worked out.  I’ll explain why I chose all of them, in case it isn’t clear.

  1. Turalyon doesn’t have much written about him and because of that, what we have is a pretty flawless example of a paladin.  He upheld his orders as they were given and fought in the name of the Light, even doubting it was right to slay orcs until he saw they were unnatural.  He’s the symbol by which all paladins should be judged.  

    With that in mind, I intentionally did not suggest Uther because he was neither lawful or particularly good to me.  In short, if Uther felt Arthas’ command was illegal he should have acted. If he had a personal code that proscribed Arthas’ actions, he should have acted to stop him.  By leaving, he simply chose not to assist the people that were to be unjustly murdered in his eyes.
  2. Varian would have been Chaotic Good at one point, but he’s been moving toward being lawful, but isn’t there yet.  He does what he believes is best not only for his family, but his kingdom (and the Alliance) which at times has him do things like threaten to invade Ironforge.  Nevertheless, he’s a good guy (as shown with his allowing Saurfang to recover his son) despite what hatreds he may have (be they appropriate or not).
  3. Jaina was actually going to be my neutral good once upon a time, but she’s been a character that has grown very well.  The idealist that she was has given way to the pragmatist she has become.  Her drive and motives remain about helping her people, but she’s no longer bound by what she felt was lawful and proper.  She does what she feels is best, regardless of what anyone else says.
  4. Windsor is probably the biggest stretch, because it was hard for me to think of a Lawful Neutral.  He’s a paladin, so he’s more than likely going to be lawful and what we know about him supports that.  He hasn’t done many great deeds (although his fight with Onyxia was up there), but he died doing his duty.
  5. I don’t believe that Tirion is an evil person, but he’s certainly not good.  He is motivated to act only when it is in his best interest and has no issue with allowing others to suffer for what he perceives to be a slight.  He was only motivated to attack the Scarlet Crusade when Taelan was imperiled and fought the Scourge only because he felt the need to see justice done.  Despite this, he has done nothing to the Forsaken and doesn’t seem prepared to do anything despite their many war crimes.
  6. Medivh is a force of nature in many ways, who is motivated by the imprint left upon him.  His actions are both good and bad, and as such he comes to be the average of them. Without him, a great many evils would not have happened – but likewise, neither would some good.
  7. Blackmoore is without a doubt an evil man; however, he seemed to use the system to his favor.  His evil acts, such as taking advantage of Taretha and weaponizing the orcs were things that appeared to be permissible given his position.
  8. Van Cleef is a bad guy because of circumstances outside of his control, but he is a bad guy because he feels himself personally wronged.  Even if he is sympathetic, the slight he received was not worthy his response – which led to the deaths of many innocent people.
  9. Benedictus serves the Old Gods and from his dialog, seems to believe in nothing save power.  He is motivated purely by a thirst for it, and seems willing to do whatever is necessary for it to be his without question.