Some days I still get stuck in a funk. I’ve been pretty good at recognizing it when it happens, and knowing what to do to counter my attitude, but sometimes I still get down on myself. That, “No matter what I do, I am never good enough,” type of attitude sets in and it’s tough to shake.
I tell myself that I am not where I “should” be in life. I think about where I would be if I hadn’t gotten sick. I tell myself that I shouldn’t have days like this anymore. I question the decisions that I am making, and wonder why, if the people in my life are so proud of me, do I still feel like I am failing them?
The answer lies inside myself, and myself only. When I am in a spot where all I can recognize are my shortcomings, I need to start making a list of my accomplishments.
Have I cleared all of the wreckage of my past? No, absolutely not. There is still work to be done, but that can be said about anything. True humility lies in our ability to remain teachable and to always keep an open-mind.
Am I closer now to being where I want to be in life than I was two years ago? Without a doubt. Even on my worst days I can recognize that I am a different person now.
Here’s what I know to be true today: I don’t have to make giant leaps every single day to be considered a success. Sometimes the smallest strides in the right direction are what counts. The important thing is that I keep moving forward.
At the end of the day, all I know is that my daughter now has the mother she deserves. And truthfully, some days it takes spending time with my 5 year old to recognize that I am doing a lot better than I think I am.
So my accomplishment today is simply this, I did not pick up. And today, that is a big enough stride for me! ❤️
now i am extremely biased, but that half time show was the best thing ive seen, i legit burst into tears when mark ronson appeared and bruno starting singing uptown funk, and then when chris joined in nope im gone bye