us and then

8

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PRINCESS ESTELLE OF SWEDEN! || 23 February 2012

When Silvia takes care of Estelle, a friend with whom Silvia often talks on the phone, describes it as sounding like this: ’But, Estelle. No, stay here with grandma!’ Followed by, ’I must go, Estelle ran away’.

Offer to the Robron Fandom

So, starting tonight, things are going to be really bloody difficult for our favourite boys, and there’s no doubt at all that some episodes are going to be….really hard to watch.

I know so many of us (myself included) have latched onto Robron in a big way, and so many of us identify with the boys, and seeing Aaron in prison, suffering abuse, and potentially even drug abuse, is going to be pretty triggering for some people.

So what I’m offering is this. If you want me to, I’m more than happy to watch the episodes (not just tonight, but over the coming weeks/months - the entire duration of this storyline) and then give you a message telling you whether you should avoid watching it or not (or at least, if you’re having a bad day, I can tell you to wait until you’re feeling a bit better before watching the episode/scenes).

I’m already going to do this for another friend here, and I’d be happy to do this for anyone else. Even if we haven’t spoken before, even if we don’t follow each other - it doesn’t matter. Just give me a message and I can make sure I PM you after the episodes and give you an idea of how heavy/intense they are.

I think it’s so important for everyone to look out for each other. I know a lot of what will happen in these episodes will be revealed in gifsets and written posts, but that’s not the same as watching it on screen, hearing the words and seeing exactly what’s going down.

This storyline is going to contain physical/verbal abuse, potential drug abuse, mentions of pedophilia, homophobia (no doubt), and I wouldn’t be surprised if Aaron self-harms again. This is going to be seriously triggering for a lot of people, for any of those reasons, and I want people to still feel safe and still be able to watch the show as a whole and enjoy the storyline as much as they can.

So please, please, please feel free to message me. You don’t have to tell me why you’re concerned, or why it might be triggering or upsetting to you. I can either give you brief details of what happens in the episodes or I can just quickly say “I wouldn’t watch if you’re having a bad day”. Like it doesn’t have to be a big deal, but it could be important.

I know some people may well need this, or they may have already asked other fandom friends to do this for them. But I also know some people might feel silly or embarrassed to ask someone, or are not sure who to ask, and I just want you to know you can ask me. It’s honestly no bother at all, and I’d be happy to do it if it’s going to help put people’s minds at ease.

So starting from tonight, this offer is open. Please please PLEASE feel free to message me - I won’t ask any questions. I’ll just add your name to a list and that will be that. Job done. And you’ll get a little message after the episode/s air.

If people could help spread the word, or want to reblog this and offer themselves up to do this too, that would be awesome. This fandom is so lovely and I’ve seen several posts of people sounding concerned for what’s to come, and I just want you to all feel safe!

This post in short: if you want me to watch Emmerdale and PM you after the episodes air to warn you about their content/let you know whether it’s safe to watch, please let me know and I’ll be happy to do that for you.

4

Mark is that a finger ❤️️?

It’s almost like... character development!

So I read a hate post (that’s wasn’t properly tagged btw) and almost all of the excuses the person used were from the first half of 2x06 (I could get into how by the end of that very episode he’s started to makes changes but we’d be here all day and this is gonna get long enough as it is) when he was feeling guilty and like it was inevitable that he would let Kara down because he had no clue how to be a hero and thought he would never be able to live up to her expectations.

Ya know, when he didn’t fully understand what being a hero meant and hadn’t seen her being one except for when she was kicking his ass and locking him up … ok so this is definitely gonna get a little long… sorry but I have fire in my heart over this and it must be released.

Mon-El is a character who can admit when he’s wrong and he has admitted – more than once –  that his initial views on Kara’s role as a hero were wrong. Which isn’t super relevant to the rest of this but still needs to be said.

Alrighty… moving on…

He said in 2x13 that what he feels for her is something that he’s never felt in his life. That he didn’t know that the emotions he’s felt since meeting her existed. Emotions like affection, tenderness, adoration… love. Imagine being raised in a world that isn’t conducive to teaching people how to love. It stands to reason that in that world things like selflessness and honor are also hard to come by.

So early on – again, when his idea of what a hero even was came from his experience of getting beat down and locked up for something he didn’t do – his concept of why someone would take those kind of risks was rooted in his belief that people didn’t do things just for the sake of helping others. As sweet as his offer to help the (not so) homeless man at the end of 2x06 was, he was still like “I’m trying to do better so I’d love to help” which is still moving in the right direction be he kinda missed the mark a bit.

The first time we start to see that Mon-El is developing feelings for Kara beyond friendship or comradery is after they were locked up at Cadmus. After she put herself in danger and then forfeited her powers all to help him. To save his life – someone that she liked well enough but had no real reason at that point to be overly attached to. She did it because she cared about his life, she believed that he had value just because he was a person.

That was probably the first time he had ever seen anything like that. It wasn’t her helping him dress and get a job. It was her risking her life for his. It’s the first time he saw what being a hero truly means to her.

That’s when heroism stopped being an abstract concept and became a reality. When they’re at her apartment he says “Any courage I do have, I learned it from you.” because that was the first time he had seen what real bravery and self-sacrifice was and it shook him.

By the end of 2x09 he’s doing a complete 180. When they’re on Slavers Moon he realizes that the honor and dignity of what Kara does as Supergirl is something that isn’t limited to a few people that personally know her. It’s something that every person that believes in Supergirl is a part of.

Without powers, on a deadly planet, she refuses to give in. And because of that she inspires the people around her to do the same. That is when he decides he wants to start training, he wants to be a part of the solution, he wants so get involved. And he commits himself to it, Kara herself admits that he’s “dedicated”.

Unfortunately his desire to help is tied to his feelings for Kara. The two things aren’t mutually inclusive but they are connected. So when he was first on the hero train and he had to make a choice, he chose Kara. Which also ended up being a lesson for him about how what really makes a hero is their willingness to put others first. 

Another thing that this person was saying was that Kara is constantly complaining about Mon-El so it’s ridiculous to think that she would want to be in a relationship with him.

But A) Alex literally addressed that in 2x06, we have been given a canon reason for why she gets frustrated with him and B) he also makes her laugh and loosen up which is kinda a part of my next point which is C)… what was my point?

Oh! Right, ok, so all of these changes in their relationship and Mon-El’s views of heroism have caused a shift between them. Mon-El is definitely a flawed character but what makes him one that I can root for - and one that Kara would want to be with - is the fact that he tries.

He tries so hard, he listens and he learns and he keeps trying no matter how long it takes him to get it right. He’s grown so much since we first met him. He was never a bad guy but he was a shallow one that had the emotional depth of a thimble. But that’s different now.

He sees the kind of person Kara is, the choices she’s made and the person she’s become despite everything she’s lost and he’s realized that he wants more. Not just in terms of a romantic relationship with her but from his existence.

He’s learned that a life of objectifying women and being a partier may have been easier but that he was never satisfied or content. He never felt fulfilled or like his life had purpose or meaning. Literally all of that ties back to the culture he was raised in and his upbringing.

I was raised in a town (and family for that matter) that is filled with more than it’s fair share of narrow-minded, racist, bigots and until I got older and experienced something different I had no idea that there was anything wrong with life the way it was.

It wasn’t until I was put in a new environment with new types of people that I realized what was wrong with the way my old life had been. But it took time to learn, it was a process and breaking old habits that have been ingrained since childhood isn’t easy. Everyone has flaws, everyone has had to adapt, everyone has had to learn and work to be better and not a single one of us can claim that we haven’t.

In conclusion – judging Mon-El for the person he was before he learned better or hating him for the fact that he hasn’t been magically transformed overnight is some hypocritical bullshit.