urkelle

Pilot episodes for TV series are a lot like ‘70’s pornos: Everyone is awkward, the acting isn’t as good as it should be, and no one really believes in the relationships being established. Sometimes, it takes entire seasons before a series finds its footing and becomes remotely enjoyable. Hell, it took Family Matters 12 episodes until they found Urkel. Can you imagine anyone actually sitting through 11 Urkel-less episodes of Family Matters? What would they even talk about if every other sentence wasn’t punctuated with a “DID I DO THAT?”

Thankfully, while you guys were busy “interacting” with “other people” in “positive ways,” I was binging these six TV shows to ensure that when you finally got around to watching them, you wouldn’t have to stumble through the weaker opening episodes. These are six shows that are waaaay more enjoyable when you don’t start them from the beginning.

30 Rock To Dr. Who: Our Binge-Watcher’s Guide Skips The Crap

ddadds characters as griffin mcelroy inventions
  • craig: a safe space for buff dads
  • mat: matchbox 21
  • hugo: the machine urkel used in family matters to transform into steve urquelle only real
  • brian: "i wrote down 'the pasta pal' and idk what that one is but it's a super good name for an invention"
  • joseph: alcoholic snapple
  • damien: ice cream/makeup/fashion forward wrist watches for dogs
  • robert: "those are just some of my really good ideas and if you know how to turn them real, fuckin don't because they're my ideas"
  • amanda: a mall where every store is hot topics
  • dadsona: savoury dinner cereal
You Trust Me, Right?

Prompt: You’re a friend of Jacob’s–you’re basically his PA, like Harrison is with Tom. You’ve been able to hang out with them a lot and after a while, Tom started to develop feelings for you. Debating continuing this. Let me know what you think

Warnings: fluff, some language, 

A/N: Requests are open! I will basically write anything (good luck finding something I won’t) and I can write for any of Seb’s characters (except Jack and Carter–I haven’t seen those yet) I can write Tom fanfic, Harrison fanfic, any marvel character. 

FEEL FREE TO MESSAGE/ASK/ANON


Part Two      Part Three     Part Four


When one of your closest friends asks you if you want to be his bagel bitch for six months in Atlanta on the set of Spider-Man: Homecoming and be paid for it, you say yes. (Y/N) had been by Jacob’s side since his nerve wracking process of auditioning for Ned Leeds began: she helped him go over his lines, set up meetings with the casting directors, and basically took over the role of his manager, so when he was given the part, the most obvious way to thank his Marvel obsessed best friend was to bring her along as his ‘bagel bitch,’ also occasionally, but lesser known as ‘coffee cutie.’

Since Jacob had so many scenes to run with Tom, the pair became fairly close as well as their PAs. Wherever Tom went, Harrison went, and wherever Jacob went, (Y/N) went too. It was never awkward for (Y/N) though. She had always found her guy friends to be more genuine, interesting, and just more fun to be around than her female friends, and Harrison and Tom were just just as accepting of her as she was of them.

After the filming for Spider-Man wrapped up, (Y/N) decided to take a quick visit to her parents’ house and see her family before the chaos of press tours began. She had been ‘off-duty’ for a couple of months before Jacob called her back into action.

“Ready for Singapore?” he asked the instant she opened the taxi cab door.

“Not ready for the flight,” she muttered in reply and crouching into the car.

“At least Tom and Harrison are flying out with us,” Jacob added. (Y/N) furrowed her eyebrows together in confusion.

“You didn’t tell me they were coming,” she stated.

“Does it matter?” he teased. The pair had known one another for a long time prior to the Spider-Man experience and Jacob had survived the months of filming without letting slip the weird fascination/fetish his friend had for English accents.

“I supposed not,” she said in return, keeping her head held high. “Gosh I hope you don’t run your big mouth.”

“I’ve made it this far without telling anyone your secret,” he replied.

“Jacob, you are the worst at keeping secrets from people you know.” It was true. He was the type of person to call up a friend to brag about how they’d never guess what he got them for their birthday and then immediately tell them what he bought.

“I’m not the worst at keeping secrets,” he protested. “I still haven’t told you that Tom had a crush on you.” He immediately covered his mouth and his eyes widened behind his glasses frames. “Damn it! Shit, I didn’t say that.”

“If my point hasn’t been proven, continue keeping secrets from me,” she sneered. “But what do you mean Tom had a crush on me?” Jacob could see that they were approaching LAX and figured that since the secret was out he’d catch her up on the details before they were around Tom and Harrison.

“Well, during the few weeks, I think both of them had a crush on you or thought you were cute or whatever–I told them they were crazy because you will forever be brace-face Urkel to me. Tom came up to me the second week asking for your number; he told me not to tell you he was asking for it and then started talking about how pretty you were and how nice you were and I was like: ‘we’re talking about her right,’ pointing at you, ‘the bagel bitch?’ It was funny because he didn’t know how chill we were with that name and kind of got defensive about it.”

“So Haz and Tom both have a crush on me?” she asked, certain he was holding back information.

“No, Harrison had a crush on you. Gosh, (Y/N), not everything is about you, you know,” Jacob laughed as they pulled up in front of LAX.

“So Harrison had a crush on me and Tom has a crush on me?” she asked pretending to be confused to get Jacob to spill.

“That’s what he told me a month ago. I still have the messages if you don’t believe–” Jacob continued before gasping, holding a hand over his mouth and using the other to point at her face accusingly. “You sneaky little witch!” he cried out as she shuffled out of the car and made her way toward the trunk to grab her luggage.

“I’m not going to say anything, Jacob. Odds are Tom isn’t going to act on anything so why would I bring it up and make this awesome trip to Singapore awkward?”

“Just go out of your way to be one of the guys, okay?” Jacob whispered as they rolled their bags into the airport to meet up with Harrison and Tom.

“Wouldn’t that raise suspicion?” she asked under her breath, intentionally screwing with Jacob’s logic just as she was trying to manipulate information out of him.

“Well then don’t do anything too girly,” he continued.

“Why the hell would I do that?”

“I don’t know!” he muttered as the blonde and brunette Englishmen came into sight.

“How about I just act natural?” she suggested.

“That sounds like a good plan!” he called in return as they met up with the other pair voyaging across the world with them. Harrison had on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt whereas Tom wore black sweats and a black t-shirt. Jacob had on athletic shorts and a t-shirt and (Y/N) wore leggings and a big t-shirt. She didn’t bother too much with doing anything with her face or hair since they were going to be on a plane for the majority of the day so her hair was tossed into a ponytail and barely applied concealer. She honestly thought she looked like the grim reaper.

“Jacob! (Y/N)!” Tom and Harrison greeted in unison. 

“Hey,” (Y/N) responded while putting her arms around Harrison in a warm hug before moving on to Tom. “I’ve missed you!”

“Are you ready for this?” Tom asked in an excited voice as they made their way toward their gate.

“Shit’s about to go down in Singapore!” Jacob stated, filling the position of hype-man. The four of them made their way onto the plane, placed their carry-on bags in the compartment above them, and started to settle into their seats.

“Oh, Jacob,” Harrison called out just before the seatbelt sign flicked on. “I forgot I had a video to show you! (Y/N) do you mind switching me seats?” (Y/N) was hesitant to move. She had already strapped herself into her seat as tightly as physically possible and was begging her body not to betray her as she faced her fear of flying for the millionth time–each ride more terrifying than the last.

“Um, sure,” she said and hurried past Harrison. Of course, she thought to herself. He would be sticking me in the window seat. She awkwardly inched past Tom, who was already seated and strapped in, and settled into the seat Harrison traded her. She pulled the seatbelt tight across her hips and dreaded the second the plane began to move. “Shitshitshit,” she muttered to herself.

“Is everything okay?” Tom asked as he pulled his headphones off his head and looked at her.

“Everything’s fine,” she lied.

“You hate flying don’t you?” he questioned her as she closed the window Harrison left open and dug her nails into her skin.

“Maybe,” she chuckled at her own irrational fears.

“There’s a reason humans were created without wings! If we were meant to fly, we would have them,” she grumbled as the pilot lined up with the runway.

“I wouldn’t have pegged you as someone who was afraid of flying,” Tom said with a smile playing on his lips.

“What makes you say that?” she asked in response as his voice and eyes distracted her from her pounding heart and quickened breaths.

“You look fearless and have an intimidating personality,” he explained while turning his body in the chair to face her.

I’m intimidating?” she scoffed. 

“Hell yeah you’re intimidating,” Tom huffed. “Look at you!”

“Is it my resting bitch face?” she asked quickly. “I’ve been told I have that.”

“Well,” he paused for a moment. “Look straight for a moment,” she complied and he surrendered to her observation, “yeah, you do.”

“Damn,” she huffed playfully, trying to avoid Tom bringing up his supposed feelings for her. Just then the engines of the plane started to roar and she tugged violently against the seatbelt one more time, preparing for take off.

“(Y/N), you trust me, right?” Tom asked as her jaw clenched. All she could do was nod and he smiled at her, feeling as though her sharing this vulnerability with him was proof of her trust in him. He grasped her hand and she held his just as tightly as the plane began to propel itself down the runway. “You’re going to be okay,” Tom said softly as he opened her window. She looked at him in pure horror, wondering how a person could ever do such a thing, and then quickly shut her eyes. 

Once they were in the air and the plane leveled off, the grip she had on Tom’s hand lessened and their ears popped from changing altitudes. (Y/N) was humming ever so quietly that he had to stare at he throat to see whether or not it was her before speaking.

“Are you humming Metallica?”

“It calms me!”