updating status

“… Today I met the first tall person who legitimately fuckin’ crouched to talk to me
                                                                          an’ m’honestly so offended right now.

Then the fucker felt th’ need t’tell me he was crouching cause I was short, like somehow I missed him squatting like a fuckin’ toad to look at me or like I somehow didn’t notice my own damn height, like, thanks buddy I never noticed before.” 

I’ve been in a distinctly odd mood the last few days, and that seems to have hit its peak today – forgive me for inactivity / delays in answering asks. I also have a week of exams next week + two more exams on the monday and tuesday following that week, so –

I’m not claiming that this is a hiatus or semi-hiatus necessarily I often write these posts then suddenly find motivation out of nowhere, but if I am slow / not here / blah blah blah exams + Odd Moods are why.

“you were my whole world”

Mary saying “you were my whole world” to john before “dying”

Mrs. Welsborough saying “Charlie was our whole world” causing sherlock to go all x files on the thatcher shrine with water imagery on his face

Someone saying that they read the episode backwards in the read through because it made more sense that way

So… Mary “died” and did some TD-12 shit and then the “whole world” phrase acts as a sort of trigger that caused sherlock to almost remember… 

(kind of interesting how in TFP it was mycroft who used trigger words/phrases to keep himself updated on sherlock’s status - mary could easily do so as well. Culverton seemed to be doing this with the “how many years have you worked here” thing)

So if all the “premonitions” in TST and TLD are not premonitions but memories,..

The timeline is backwards???

// Fanfiction status updates are kinda heartbreaking. I started with 1000 people having seen the first chapter, and it dropped down to 300.

I suppose more people would read if it were a direct romance, but still. It makes me a little blue. 

I’m still grateful to have even one person read my work. Don’t get me wrong. Seeing those numbers can just make a person feel like they have gotten worse instead of better.

Gotta fight those incorrect insecurities man. 


sketchbook things!! check image for captions!

i also post to insta and twitter a little more regularly, i plan on cleaning up some of these but i`ll just post them here for my own peace of mind lmao

An Important Update

Hey guys. What I’m about to tell you may not come as a surprise for many of you, especially considering the past couple weeks. It’s not something I’ve ever wanted to do, and making this decision was and still is very difficult even though I know, for my own sanity, I need to do it.

WTMYH is going to be going on hiatus for a while.

How long? I’m not sure.

Why? Lots of reasons.

When I started WTMYH, Roslin wasn’t even a year old yet. She required a lot less time and energy. She was still taking two naps! My day to day takes a lot more out of me, and on top of that, my creative energy has hit a serious low. The past few weeks I’ve been feeling very discouraged, uninspired, and unmotivated. The thought of working on a chapter was daunting and stressful.

This is not my ideal outcome.

I’ve fought for so long not to become one of ‘those’ authors. The ones that don’t finish (even though, by all accounts, I have finished. TWICE.) But I’ve been making myself miserable.

I’m also going to be cutting back on stream time.

As things stand, I only have two nights out of the week ‘off’. And it’s not enough. I need more time for myself, alone, and to spend with my husband and family. I love hanging out with you guys, and @wrexie and @totalskeletontrash, but my priorities have been slanted for, well, a year.

I’m still going to be here.

I’ll still be on Tumblr every day. I’m still going to be around to talk and I’m not just going to disappear. I’ll still try to pop into streams at least once a week.

I understand that many people will be disappointed. Trust me, no one is more disappointed than me.

This feels like a failure. What if I could just work harder? Try to do more? Am I just copping out and being ‘lazy’? I think a lot of that is my ADD talking, but it sure is hard to tell the difference between hard truths and the lies of my brain chemistry.

I think the past year has been catching up to me. A year of spreading myself out over a number of things, and I need some time to pull back and regroup. Maybe I need to just work on something different for a little while after I take a real guilt-free rest. 

I don’t know. 

I’m really sorry you guys.