honestly half my headcanons are just “what increasingly ridiculous things can i make the vagabond do”
and so anyway during a heist the crew is hitting a bunch of stores at once for Plot Reasons, and ryan goes off to rob the one circled on his map
but he pushes open the door to the shop and doesn’t even manage to get his gun out before a huge box is being pushed into his arms
and ryan’s trying to peer around the edges of it as he holds it, just sort of taken aback, like, “uh–”
and this tiny old lady, like, possibly one hundred years old with enormous sunglasses and curly white hair, goes back behind the counter and says, “you’re late. start unpacking everything onto the bottom shelf in the back.”
awkwardly, ryan’s like, “um, i’m not–”
and the lady doesn’t even look at him as she waves a hand imperiously in his general direction and barks, “now, young man.”
and ryan–masked up and tall and broad-shouldered and armed–sort of snaps to attention and mumbles, “yes, ma’am.”
three hours later the crew finally manages to find him, thinking he’s injured or kidnapped or dead–
and they find the vagabond working politely and diligently in a little crafts shop while somebody’s grandma barks orders at him.
(”what the fuck are you doing? we need to go,” geoff snaps.
“right, just– my break isn’t until two,” ryan says, brow furrowed in concern.)