unless you like it then; call me

so with the news about geoff taking a sabbatical, my brain did the “ridiculous headcanon” thing it does and imagined fake ah crew geoff getting burned out (”because organizing you assholes is like trying to herd a fucking swarm of hornets”) and deciding to go on vacation for a while to recharge

and geoff’s basically like “do not call me unless there is an emergency,” and for geoff an emergency consists of:

  • the actual, literal apocalypse
  • nothing else
  • do not call him

but geoff pretty quickly finds out that for the crew, an emergency can be:

  • “did you pack underwear” —jack
  • “i can’t find the remote” —gavin
  • “geoff please i can’t find it call me back” —gavin
  • “gavin and i are arguing about the probability of flipping three coins and the– geoff? hello? did you hang up on me?” —ryan
  • “ryan ended his murder break because of an argument with gavin and is trying to blow up everything in the tri-county area” —michael
  • “michael’s a fucking tattletale” —ryan
  • “i’m drunk and i wrote a rap about you here listen” —jeremy
  • “i’m drunk and jeremy wrote a rap about you and i beatboxed and it’s amazing please answer your phone” —lindsay
  • “i’m drunk and weepy and i miss you” —virtually everyone, on the same night
  • (“i’m sober and annoyed and please save me” —ray)

geoff bursts into the penthouse two weeks before he’s supposed to return and everybody’s basically like what the hell are you doing geoff you’re supposed to be relaxing and geoff has a conniption fit

anonymous asked:

How does Astra handle Alex's death?

So, since the prompts have been slowing down, unless any new ones appear suddenly, I’m going to call this the end of the series. It’s been 43 parts and 50k and I think we’ve covered an entire lifetime of important events. So this seems like a natural end. I hope everyone who’s read the shorts has enjoyed them. I know these little bits have encouraged me to take up writing again, so thank you to that first anon, whoever you are. And for the rest of you, enjoy this last bit.

Previous parts

When Alex goes, she’s well into her nineties. Death didn’t dar take her until she was ready, and now she’s good and ready. She’s made her peace with the world, and now she’s old and creaking and she’s done everything she wanted to do in life and more.

Astra is home, Kara is there with her, both making dinner, trying yet again to recreate a Kryptonian dish with Earth ingredients. They say they almost have it down. The both of them had grown closer than ever after Cat had died some years before. 

Alex is in the chair in the living room where she spends most of her time. She’s still pretty mobile for someone over ninety, but she’s still older than dirt, movement doesn’t happen too often or with any ease. But her chair is central to everything and so she’s happy enough.

Vega flies in the window just as the food is ready to go on the table. She waves and her mothers and aunt and smiles. Just in time for food, as always. She did always have good timing when it came to food. 

Alex looks over at her family and smiles. She never really believed that old people could feel when it was to go, but she feels it now. One last meal with her family and then she’ll be gone. She’s content with this end. It’s what everyone wants, a quiet end in their sleep. It was a damn sight more than she thought she would get after all the years at the DEO.

She pulls herself up slowly from her chair when Astra starts setting the table. Astra smiles at her, full of love from all the years they’ve spent together. Alex’s heart still beats hard seeing that smile. Vega comes with the food a second later and rolls her eyes at their lovestruck expressions, but a secret smile on her face when she turns away from them. Then Kara is there, trying not to help Alex into her chair. She knows better, but she still worries. It’s tables turned from when they were young. Alex doesn’t mind too much. It’s only fair she supposes.

And as she looks at them all, she thinks what a wonderful life she’s had. She looks at Vega and Astra and Kara and sees the women who fell from the starts like wishes granted. They gave her love and family that she thought she was missing, with enough love to see that she hadn’t been missing anything at all, she just wasn’t looking in the right places. Who could really say such things about their lives?

“I love you all,” Alex says in that papery old woman voice that she still doesn’t think of as her own. “I’m so thankful I’ve had you all in my life.”

Astra looks at her, worry behind the hand that reaches out and squeezes Alex’s. Alex looks back at her and lets Astra see the truth. After years of being a solider, then a prisoner, then finally at the DEO, Astra knows what a person looks like just before they pass. Alex sees her realize, her expression falters for just a second before her eyes clear again and she nods. She understands, as she always had and Alex is thankful.

Kara and Vega just smile. They don’t see the meaning behind it. She supposes it will be clear to them soon enough, but for now Alex is happy that they are content.

“Love you too, Mom,” Vega says.

Kara is quick to echo her. “Yeah, Alex, love you too.”

Alex just smiles back at the both of them and settles in to eat.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

I would refrain from calling me buttercup unless you think being impaled by a dagger as fun... And no I haven't heard of this "popcorn", in Asgard our food is lacking in anything that isn't meat... However this popcorn stuff sounds rather nice, unless it's explosive like the name implies... -Loki

Alright, lets get one thing straight. If you’re bringing daggers, I’m not letting you in.

And you can forget about the popcorn.

Writing Trans Characters

DO:

1. Treat them like regular people, like actual human beings, because they are people, not just trans

2. Mention they’re trans at some point, because proper representation is important- it doesn’t have to be a huge reveal, it can just be one sentence, it can be totally offhand

3. Be confident about including trans characters in any setting- there have been trans people since there has been gender, there’s no context in which their presence makes no sense

4. Research things like binders and tucking and hormone therapy if you don’t know anything about them

DON’T:

1. Do that thing where a character’s like “I was Steve… But now call me… Stevette”

2. Include a trans character simply for the purpose of fetishisation

3. Feature unsafe practices like binding with bandages unless it’s really crucial to the plot, somehow

4. Use the phrase “trapped in the wrong body” or outdated terminology like “transsexual”- all of which can be easily researched- because like, honestly, it’s just not correct

Me: The Bye Bye Man? I can’t take this seriously it sounds like a five year old named this guy what. No, I’m gonna laugh my ass off in the theater what else is playing

Youtube: Hey… you should check out this movie… it’s called Split and it’s about-

Me: 

Yuri on Ice interview with Kubo Mitsurou - A summary

Alright, so it wasn’t exactly an interview, it was the last episode official YOI web radio called Yuri on Radio, which you can listen to here. (Unless the videos get deleted which happens quite a lot, but it’s still there at the time of writing). Regardless of what you want to call it, it featured a few questions to Kubo (who, as you know, is the author of the story to YOI) and her answers and I’d like to deliver them to you.

Note: This is only a rough translation, not a word for word translation, though it should hopefully convey the most relevant information. Feel free to correct me if you think I got something wrong!

With that out of the way, let’s dive into the most important/interesting questions and answers.

Okay, so this first bit isn’t really a question, but more of a fun fact from behind the scenes but let me keep the format similar to the rest of the post:

The seiyuu received manga drafts from Kubo to use as references before recording sessions to better understand the characters. At first they were around 70 pages long (around the first episode) but by the last episode, there were about 120-130 pages of manga dedicated to each episode. The manga drafts were essentially drafts for the episodes and Kubo and Yamamoto had to carefully select the content they wanted to include in the anime because unfortunately there was too much she wanted to show in just 23 minutes per episode. Kubo said that it was a difficult choice because there were many scenes that she wanted to be animated but a number of them had to be thrown away and never used in the anime.

[I know that some people will ask so let me say: I doubt that the manga draft they made for references will ever be fully published. I’m assuming it wasn’t a proper manga and more like sketches with speech bubbles that look nothing like the neat little volumes you may usually purchase. It wasn’t meant to be beautiful, only useful to the seiyuu and it was a way of presenting stories with which Kubo was most comfortable and which she found the easiest to create.]

How close is Kubo with Yamamoto (the director) and how long have they known each other?

They haven’t known each other very long; Yamamoto approached her in the Summer of 2014, asking whether she would like to write a story for a figure skating anime. In the Summer of 2015 they met practically every day in Kubo’s place to create the story and often ended up cooking and eating together (she explained it by saying that they got so excited over writing it that it made them hungry lol). Kubo also highlighted that Yamamoto has great love for anime and for figure skating and she was glad to work with her and create Yuri on Ice with Yamamoto’s advice and her help in terms of details.

Why was Hasetsu (based on Karatsu in Saga, Kyushu) chosen as Yuuri’s hometown?

There are few famous figure skaters from Kyushu and Kubo wanted to show such unlikely origins for a famous skater for a change, and also wanted to present Yuuri as the ‘hope of the region’. She also hoped to make it a generic town where you could find anywhere (which would make it relatable and easy to picture for many viewers). She also thought that making it into a town located around a castle would leave a good impression (and would look nice to foreigners watching the show). So they searched the region and finally chose Karatsu as the perfect basis for creating Hasetsu. Up till now Karatsu wasn’t a famous travel location (being rather old and small and offering nothing special in particular), but it seems that the anime is already inviting more tourists to the city (which apparently was also what they hoped for).

Who was the easiest character to draw?

Kubo didn’t hesitate to say that it was JJ. She felt like she knew exactly how he would look and act so putting it down on paper was essentially simple. She said that Yurio was also quite easy to draw.

Now what’s interesting is that Kubo said that Yurio was the first character she came up with but they decided that they couldn’t make him the main character because “he couldn’t pull the story along”. He didn’t have any clear weaknesses the way Yuuri did, he didn’t have the desire to get involved with others or the predisposition to interact with other people the way Yuuri did, and they realized that the story progressed and developed much better when they paired Victor and Yuuri and the narrative began partly depending on them. She said that Yuri on Ice became what it was thanks to the decision to focus on Yuuri instead of Yurio (because they couldn’t find a good way to move the story forward with Yurio as the MC). She also said that Yurio was more of a tragic character and if he was the main character then the anime would become a sad story and they wanted to prevent that. They preferred to make it into a story overflowing with love. They chose not to speak about Yurio’s family in the anime in order not to give him a handicap and instead showed his relationships with many people who would support and help him in the future. She also said she wished she could show more of Yurio and Otabek’s friendship and she had a few scenes in mind but in the last episodes she had to cut out all of the lines that weren’t absolutely necessary. She said that she actually wanted to include many more scenes for many of the characters but it was a story about Yuuri Katsuki after all and she wanted to prioritize it in the end.

That’s about that for the relevant information, although they did mention the big seiyuu event featuring Kubo that will take place on April 29th, 2017, and, I presume, will also include some announcement regarding the second season.

I hope you found this post informative! Thanks for reading!

HOW TO BE A BETTER PERSON THAN TAMLIN: A Guide by Rhysand of the Night Court.

Greetings, my dearest readers.

Some of you might have seen THIS POST by that absolute flapjack, Tamlin. 

Even though part of me was like, “No, no, Rhys, do not engage in that useless mint sprig’s belligerent commentary, a more dominant part of me was like, “He is still trying to fuck my mate and for that I will serve him his own ass on a platter.”

So, you utter string bean, I will now contradict you. Brace yourself.

A brief prologue: Don’t call your bitch a bitch. Unless of course, she is a freak (like yourself) and asks to be referred to this during a sexual encounter. You wouldn’t know this, of course, since plants reproduce asexually.

  1. If your significant other is about to die for you, you should definitely do something about that.
  2. If you manage to escape your captor the night before your lover is about to risk her life for you for possibly the last time, you should probably go ahead and smite yourself. Save her the trouble. This is polite.
  3. Again, if you would just throw yourself off of a fucking staircase, you would not have to worry about saving her from getting her neck snapped in the first place. 
  4. If she wakes up in the middle of the night vomiting and having nightmares, you should hold her hair back. Cuddle her. Reassure her. Give her nose kisses. Not play possum like the possum that you are.
  5. No, you’re quite right. She cannot take care of herself. Not after hunting and feeding her family singlehandedly for most of her life. No, she is helpless. 
  6. If she loses weight all of a sudden without stating she’s decided to go on a diet, she is feeling ill and not eating enough. Although, I’m aware that the Spring Court only dines on small pebbles and potting soil. 
  7. ***IMPORTANT!*** If another man who wears the same incredibly stylish outfit makes a bargain to take “your” lady friend to his court to teach her to write/generally keep her safe from your pathetic furry ass, it might not be a bad thing. 
  8. Once again, she obviously cannot defend herself. No way. Not with all those powers. Not a chance.
  9. If she tells you she ran away out of free will, then she ran away out of free will. 
  10. If you actually accept help from an evil king, you really and truly are the most stupid creature to ever roam the planet. But we already knew that.

I eagerly await Hamlin’s response. Also, I should hope he knows how lovely mine and Feyre’s nightly mental dirty time was last evening. Absolutely splendid

Much shade,

Rhysand :-)

Text Prompts;
  • [text]: call or text me back please. i’m getting worried.
  • [text]: come round to mine and make me ;)
  • [text]: how drunk was i last night?
  • [text]: you were so wasted last night!
  • [text]: why do i have a stop sign in my living room?
  • [text]: i’m craving pizza… 
  • [text]: wanna grab lunch and a movie?
  • [text]: i can’t tonight, tomorrow?
  • [text]: that cutie is here again. should i talk to them? i won’t know if they like me unless i talk to them… 
  • [text]: i can literally feel my hair turning grey by the second… save me! PLEASE!
  • [text]: GUESS WHO HAS A DATE?!
  • [text]: batman or superman? you know, for science…
  • [text]: team cap or team iron man? our friendship rests on this…
  • [text]: any new book recommendations? 
  • [text]: me. you. a bottle of vodka. my place. now.
  • [text]: i really need a friend right now
  • [text]: i can’t believe what i just overheard in the bathroom…
  • [text]: for the last time, stop fucking texting me
  • [text]: i’m sorry, who is this?
  • [text]: fuck off!!
  • [text]: wanna be my plus one to my exes wedding? and pretend to be in love with me?
  • [text]: i just wanted to say, i love you and i forgive you
  • [text]: we need to talk.
  • [text]: what time you getting home?
  • [text]: word on the street is you got laid last night. i need all the deets!
  • [text]: pretty please? with sugar on top!
  • [text]: you love me really!
  • [text]: i have never in my life been this angry. i can’t believe this has happened!
  • [text]: sorry to miss your call, what’s up?
  • [text]: i got fired! I GOT FUCKING FIRED! :( 
  • [text]: my boss is giving me the eye…
  • [text]: pants are optional.
  • [text]: did you get the thing????
  • [text]: ??????
  • [text]: eww… the grossest thing ever just happened… 
  • [text]: shit shit shit
  • [text]: asshole, much?
  • [text]: don’t need to be a dick about it
  • [text]: wait, what?
  • [text]: how did you get this number?

Originally posted by sandandglass

The lil eyebrow thing, that kills me, ya know, LIKE I dunno why but??? I love the eyebrow thing LIKE THE EYEBROW THING YA KNOW LOOK LOOK AT IT IF SOMEONE DOES THAT TO ME I’M IMMEDIATELY LIKE ‘oh shit, okay.’ Like. T h e  e y e b r o w  t h i n g. 

Originally posted by finnamonroll

Word of advice Sethie poo, DON’T CALL THE SCARY RUSSIAN WRESTLER A BITCH. Okay, but. He look good saying bitch so. Like. I’d be down for it. Not him calling me a bitch. Cause. I mean. That’s no bueno. Unless I am being a bitch. Which ya know, happens sometimes.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

That’s my motto all day e’ryday. 

WHAT A DORK OH MY GOD, Look at this floof ball THIS BALL OF LOVE AND FLUFF AND CUDDLES, YOU ARE SUCH A CUTIE PATOOTIE TURTLE BOOTY okay. 

Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle  DO DO DO DO DO DO WIGGLE WIGGLE WIGGLE

Guess who has been sassy since forever. TAKE A REAL FUCKING GOOD GUESS, IT’S THIS TURD. 

Same. Samesies. I PLAY AIR GUITAR ON EVERYTHING BUT THAT IS HEAVY I CAN SEE IT BY LOOKING AT IT OKAY LIL TROPHIES ARE HEAVY I meaN REALLY. 

Knowing my sassy ass, I would have been like. “Everything,” blank faced and all. But IT WOULD BE OUT OF LOVE NOT MALICE.

I like that shirt. That’s a reaLLY NICE SHIRT 

Skinny jean shot, not gonna lie, THIS IS PRETTY DAMN HOT LIKE I’D BE ALL OVER THAT.

:) :) :) ALL SMILES WOW this seal is blessed, this seal is my fav bc LOOK AT THAT SMILEY WOW, GIGGLY BOY. 

*puts trophy in shirt and pretends like alien is eating through my belly* RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRR 

Nah, but look at that body tho dayum. 

Lil sweet baby nugget :’) 

okay I know this one is a lil hard to see cause dark BUT LOOK AT HIS LIL GLASSES THIS BOY IN GLASSES, making me cry

I LOVE THIS BC WHITE SHIRTS LOOK GOOD ON WRESTLERS DOn’t ASK ME WhY THEY JUST DO LIKE IT’S JUS T SCIENCE OKAY.

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

LOOK AT HIS GLASSES OKAY AND HIS LIL BLONDE AND HIS LIL GRR FACE I CANNOT DEAL WITH THIS RIGHT NOW OKAY OKAY I’M SO SAD

Originally posted by thearchitectwwe

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  I def have a back kink I know I’m soRRY MOM. 

Originally posted by prowrestlingnow

:’) this smile is so pure, it has cleared my skin, has taken care of my health, I WILL NEVER BE SO HAPPY

Originally posted by thearchitectwwe

how about we not be a smug sass master toda- no? Okay great. 

that tongue tho, them thighs tho, THIS EVERYTHING THO, HOT DAYUM LIKE A SUMMER CHOIR. 

I know sometimes y’all like “damn, this girl talks to much, I JUST WANNA LOOK AT THE PICTURES STFU,” so pre-warning, I’m gonna talk a lot during this picture and it’s not for the reasons you think. First off, okay YOU ARE IN FRONT OF A GREEN SCREEN WEARING A GREEN ASS SHIRT, LIKE WHAT ARE YOU DOING, THIS IS NOT WHAT YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO DO, THIS IS LIKE GREEN SCREEN RULE NUMBER ONE, DON’T WEAR A SHIRT THAT’S THE SAME FUCKING GREEN AS? THE?? SCREEN???? ALSO SECOND, okay second isn’t so much of a rant, but kinda is at the same time??? WHY ARE YOUR DAMN KEYS HANGING OUT OF YOUR POCKET LIKE THAT DURING THIS PHOTOSHOOT OH MY GODDDDDDDD THAT’S LIKE. I dunno if there’s a rule against it BUT WHY OKAY WHY I HANG MY KEYS OUTTA MY POCKET LIKE THAT TOO BUT I AIN’T TAKING A PHOTOSHOOT OKAY. Third, and last… Probably last. I dunno yet, anywho, THIS LOOKS LIKE THE CHEESY SCHOOL PHOTO YOU TAKE IN SCHOOL, WHO MAKING HIM CHEESY LIKE THIS, WHO IS DIRECTING HIM LIKE THIS, bc no. Okay super last, I love Taking Back Sunday. So. Yeah. Good shirt. But not for this occasion. Ya fruit. I love you. 

I love his face in this picture okay, like I love his face in other pictures too, okay BUT THIS PICTURE HIS FACE IS LIKE SASSY BUT ALSO PUPPY AND I JUST WOWOWOWOWOWOW i love this picture 

Stripe shirt for the win. 

Originally posted by iteamhelena

YEAH I AM IN A CONSTANT STATE OF QUESTION MARK ALSO LMAo

Originally posted by totaldivasepisodes

Isn’t there a song where they do this in the music video???? 

Originally posted by stellarollins

he does the thing you do when people put ice down your shirt WHICH I DON’T UNDERSTAND BC IT’S A CAKE IT IS NOT COLD but okay Shannon, what if he got cake down his shirt, NO THAT’S NOT THE WAY IT WORKS OKAY HE STARTED OFF ABOUT TO SPRINT AND HE ENDS WITH CRUSHING DEFEAT 

Originally posted by stellarollins

alright Seth, MY 4 YEAR OLDS THROW BETTER TANTRUMS ThAN THAT DAMN. 

Originally posted by totaldivasepisodes

I love how he’s just like ‘okay, who dis?’ CAUSE I WOULD BE DYING OF LAUGHTER BC WTF WHERE DID YOU COME FROM COAT BOY? 

Originally posted by stellarollins

Look at this bouncy puppy, I love him so much :’) 

Look at how pure this picture is okay, LOOK AT THIS OKAY THIS PICTURE, THIS FUCKING PICTURE OKAY but just imagine this is how he looks when he’s like enamored with you and just listening to you talk but you’re probs saying something sassy to him AND WOW okay I’m done I AM DONE  

:’) I cry. HIS BODY IS SO FIRM good lord, I can’t do this today I CAN’T DEAL WITH THIS TODAY 

okay but GOD DAMN LOOK AT THIS GIF, YA WANNA KNOW THE SEXIEST SETH GIF HERE YA FUCKIING GO BC LOOK AT THE CHIN BEARD RUB AND HIS EYEBROWS AND THE SHIRT IS LIKE ROLLED UP A BIT OKAY AND JUST O H M Y G O D KILL ME, JUST KILL ME NOW BECAUSE TEHRE WILL NEBVER BE ANYTHING AS GODLY AS THIS GIF I JUST I AM wow I am wowed. 

I make this face a lot, so I can relate. Which means I am on the same cuteness scale as Seth is, sorry it’s science, if you love Sethiekins, you prob love me also, sorry not sorry. 

Originally posted by potatoews-and-grilled-cheese

We’re just gonna end this with my fav Seth gif, look at this nerd, I love him so much.

“Well, this is a predicament,” Plagg noted, nonchalant, peering down at the distance Adrien would fall if he made one wrong move.

Adrien supposed it was his own fault; rushing to the nearest isolated place before his timer ran out. It just so happened that this time, he ended up on a tower’s ledge, trying his hardest to think of what to do while simultaneously ignoring the inner stream of shitshitshit his thoughts turned into.

“Unless you can transform me again, I don’t need your apathy.” If he just took a deep breat—okay, deep breaths are bad. Very, very bad.

“Chat?” a familiar voice called out above him. His Lady’s voice. “You’re still here?”

Oh, he couldn’t let her see him like this. Sure, he always managed to embarrass himself in front of her, but this situation was on a completely different level. “Yeah, I’m fin—“

“He’s stuck,” Plagg completed for him. “Help him before he turns into a human splatter.”

Adrien narrowed his eyes. “Cheese will be a word forever canceled from your life.”

“Worth it.”

“Wait a second,” Ladybug said. A shift, a few seconds later, and she was dangling in front of him, eyes closed. “Grab onto me.”

A hopeless case, unable to deny his Lady anything, Adrien did as told, breathless by Ladybug’s close proximity and fascinated – marveling.

Ladybug had interacted with his civilian identity more than once, but this was different. She was treating him as Chat while unknowingly holding Adrien. If she simply chose to open her eyes, she would know the truth.

He knew it would be struggle for him if their roles were reversed, a trial. He’d probably tremble in anticipation; tilt his head awkwardly just in case his pressing desire to know overwhelmed him.

It must be so easy for her, to keep her eyes closed…

“You’re wrong…” Ladybug murmured, her breath warm against his neck.

It was then that Adrien realized he voiced his thoughts aloud, had registered Ladybug’s answer, just as she set him on the ground, turned around and dashed to a direction he was too incoherent to determine, the beeps of her timer becoming a faded sound.

Keep reading

Voicemail

Originally posted by korea-underqround

Word Count: 456

Genre: Fluff

Request:  a scenario where jay park changes your voicemail (a funny but cute one like “hey this is jay, leave a message cause she’s can’t get the phone now, unless you are her ex-boyfriend or something”) XD


“Have you seen my phone?” I asked my best friend as we both laid on the couch, watching a movie that was currently playing. I got up slightly to see if it was under me, but nothing.

I didn’t have work today, neither did Jay, but as we were both making breakfast he got a call from the company, asking him to come over. I didn’t complain though, I knew that he had to work extra hard, I mean, he was the CEO of his own company. So I didn’t really complain. Instead I told him to wait a few so I could feed him at least.

I called my best friend to spend the day together and now we were currently looking for my phone. I looked under the couch but nothing at all.

“Here, give me your phone” I said, putting my hand out so she could give me her phone, while the other one was on my waist, looking around to see if I spotted it somewhere.

I didn’t feel anything, I knitted my eyebrows and looked at her confused.

“You want my phone?” She had a look of horror. I clicked my tongue and rolled my eyes at her unnecessary reaction as I took her phone from her pocket. She pouted and I just smiled to myself.

I went to the contacts and clicked on my name. it rang and rang until I heard Jay’s voice. Confused, I was about to respond when-.

“Hey, this Jay, Y/n’s amazing loving Boyfriend. Leave a message after the beep, unless you’re her ex. If you are then how bout you call on February 31st

I started to laugh at the voice mail and shook my head.

“Goofball” I whispered to myself as I was about call once more.

“Found it!” She cheered while holding my phone up.



Couple of hours later I heard the door open and close. It was 11:17 so I knew it was Jay. I was changing my shirt when I felt hands wrap around me. I smiled as I felt his warm lips press against my bare shoulder. I turned around and wrapped my arms around his neck and smiled up at him while giving him small pecks on his chin.

“Why are you still up?” He asked while kissing my forehead.

“Waiting for you, I mean, I’ll always wait for my “amazing loving boyfriend” I said pulling away and putting my shirt on.

“So you heard it” He laughed while sitting on the bed.

“Yes, and it was extremely cheesy, but also sweet” I laughed while going behind him on the bed and giving him small pecks all around his neck.

“Let go to sleep” I whispered against his skin.

  • Momota: I’m so tired that I’m hearing colors.
  • Kiibo: That’s not possible unless you’re hallucinating. Are you on drugs? Instead, of turning to drugs. You can come to me. I’m sure whatever problem you have is nothing intensive therapy can’t fix.
  • Momota: I’m not using. I’m just tired. You can stop nagging, Mom!
  • Akamatsu: Kiibo, you do have your moments where you start acting like an paranoid, overbearing parent.
  • Kiibo: Is that why Angie, Yumeno, Iruma, and Ouma have been calling me Mama Kiibo?
3

requested by anon

Dylan: Hey, I hope this doesn’t make us awkward.

Thomas: No, why would it be? I know she loves me … unless you like her. 

Dylan: What, NO! That’s just horrible.

Thomas: Your calling my girlfriend horrible?

Dylan: NO! As in I see her more like a sister than anything, which just makes it weird when filming Teen Wolf. 

Thomas: Right.

Dylan: Gotta say though, she’s a really good kisser. 

Thomas: ….

Anger Management

Imagine getting into an argument with Damon and you two end up having angry sex.

– Anon Request

Btw, guys, to me, ‘imagine’ requests are like long drabbles, so unless you want like a long fic, specify one shot or just write ‘fic/fanfic/fanfiction’ and don’t mention imagine in it :)

(gif not mine, credits to the owner)

“You are so stupid!” You screamed at him, throwing your arms up in frustration. “Me?! Stupid?! Who’s the one who attacked without a plan?!” He screamed at you. “I know what was I doing! And frankly, I can save myself!” You yelled back. “So you’re calling me weak?!” Damon asked, anger flaring up his face. “I’m not calling you weak! I’m calling you reckless!” You screamed, annoyed at him.

“Well I’m sorry for pushing you out of the way in getting fucking stabbed!” He screamed. “I’m an Original for fuck’s sake! I won’t die but you will!” You screamed at him. “You can’t follow a simple task and you could’ve ended up dead for real!” You screamed, fear in your heart as you spoke those scary words.

“If it means that you’re alive then why the fuck do I care?! I fucking love you,  (y/n)! You’re the only one I ever think about! Can’t you get that in your head?!” He asked. You sped, pinning him to the wall. “If you love me like you say, you’re not going to risk your life for me when I know I can live no matter what and you can die!” You seethed.

He sped, switching places so he pinned you on the wall, his hips firmly against yours, his hand tightly keeping both of yours above your head. “I’m sorry princess, but no can do, you’re always the first one I will save no matter what you are, even if your a fucking immortal, I will save you no matter what.” He said, staring down at you, and the neck second, his lips were attached to yours, fiercely kissing you.

He let go of your hands and they dropped to your hips, pulling you against his hard member. In his excuse, angry you never fails to turn him on.

You both sped, hitting wall per wall as your kisses grew hungrier and intense, clothes getting ripped from the other in a matter of seconds. You ended up in the living room, Damon pinning you down the couch as he kissed down your body, sucking marks that’ll last for a few seconds, feeling your skin heat up even just a tiny bit to his touch.

You flipped the two of you and you straddled his lap, pushing yourself down his entire length, moaning at the feel of him filling you up, making you feel as if it was your first time with him.

He held you close and tight, fingertips digging into your soft flesh, his other arm sprawled across your back, his hand tangling on your hair as he pulled, exposing your neck to his lips. You raked your nails up and down the expanse of his back, eliciting a hiss from him.

You two then moved around once again, ending on top of the rug on the floor, him pressing you down the ground as he thrusts into you hard and fast, making you scream his name so loud the whole Mystic Falls probably hearing you two having intense angry sex.

Pleasure quickly built in your systems and with one hard thrust, he hand you coming hard and hot around him as he spilled into you, coming as your walls clenched around him.

You two breathed hard, chest heaving against each other, still on the floor. He gently pulled out of you and he sped the both of you back on the couch, resting you on top of him. You shook as he soothed you by running his hand up and down your back. “I’m sorry for being reckless, (y/n).” He started, not looking down at you. You closed your eyes and sighed. “And I’m sorry for calling you stupid.” You replied.

He looked down at you and slowly brought your face to look up at him. He softly pressed his lips to yours. “I love you.” He murmured against your mouth. “I love you too.” You said, closing your eyes as you enjoyed the feel of his lips moving with yours.

my name is Aemilia and i started the Moon Discourse™

hello everyone! whether you’re reading this or have been redirected here by a link. welcome to my blog.

my name’s Aemilia, i’m a trans demiboy, but i usually just tell people i’m nonbinary or agender(my ID is like mostly genderless and a tiny bit boy) because i don’t like being called a boy (whole load of transphobic family stuff i don’t wanna get into) so please don’t call me a man or a boy unless we’re friends and you’ve asked. i use they/them pronouns, i’m ace, demi/pan romantic and i “HCed” the moon as my own identity!

i’ve found myself explaining the same things to people who didn’t see the original post over and over again, an i’m pretty tired of retyping all of this out, so here what i meant by “the moon is an asexual demiromantic demiboy”

i didn’t “alter a meme” i made a post that was directly referring to a joke i’ve had with my friends for quite i while. i didn’t know it was a wlw meme. i’ve been calling the moon my boyfriend for a while.

like in the summer/occasionally now when i’d go for night walks I post pictures of the moon on my snap story with something like “i’m visiting my boyfriend!” and my friends (both irl an internet friends, many of whom are on tumblr) would reply with stuff like “oh give him a high five for me” and “tell him hi” and i’d send videos back of me doing that.

that’s pretty much what this was about. it was a post clarifying the exact identity of my “mood boyfriend/datefriend” 
there’s evidence of this (sort of?) on my tumblr if you go through the tag “boyfriend” it’s something i’ve been doing for a while.

i didn’t mean for the moon to be an “ace thing” or a “trans thing” or a “demi thing” and previously i didn’t know it was a lesbian thing, it was just sorta my own little thing, not intending to harm or “spite” anyone.

similarly to how all of the people angry about this didn’t know how it was just a joke between my friends and i, because it was an inner community thing between just me and my friends, i didn’t know it was a wlw thing because it was a joke between just wlw. and i’m not a woman so i’m not involved in any of that.
it’s been brought up that when informed it was a wlw thing i should have been respectful, and here’s what i have to say on that:

no one really explained at first. it was just rb after rb saying the same thing “she’s a lesbian” which without explanation can come across as pretty TERFy (i’m not calling anyone a TERF here, i’m just saying that i, personally, misinterpreted things) because as you may be aware, lots of trans boys are told they’re “just lesbians” and gay trans boys are “just straight girls” so my being a trans masculine person calling something transmasculine and having that reaction. i’m sure you can understand.

and the first few responses explaining things stated that the moons syncs up with women’s menstrual cycles, so it had to be a women.which is also a sort of transphobic thing. since i did clarify the moon was a -trans- boy and would have the potential of being a man who menstruated..

i repeat. please do not blame “ace tumblr” for this. i do not represent my entire community and i was not trying to take the moon for my community. i didn’t know that the moon was something that could be taken from anyone. it’s my fault, it was unintentional. i was not trying to attack any community.

this is a message to all a-spec/trans/demigender/male ailgned people: the moon is not our symbol. i did not claim it for us, if there are people saying it is a universal a-spec/trans/demigender/male symbol. you need to stop.

i’m not religious, but i feel like religion & mooncourse is an issue that needs to be addressed. friends of mine over at @netherian-phoenix-speaks have made a lovely post about it, explaining how their religion has been used in arguments that have to do with the moon. unfortunately, being on mobile, i am unable to add a link to that post.

but ultimately it reexplains how in my moon “HC” i had been referring to the actually physical space rock in the sky, not the deities or goddesses/gods that are associated with it. since some people claimed i was disrespectful for calling the moon a boy because “she’s a goddess in x religion” “the moon goddess is a lesbian”

many of these people were ignoring the fact that other religions have male moon deities. and many of the people making these claims were not even of the religions of these goddess’s religions.

my friends @netherian-phoenix-speaks
speaks asked people to please not use their goddesses as any argument in mooncourse in respect to the fact that she is indeed a goddess and it is disrespectful to use a deity in that manner.

the response to them has included wlw telling this blog that they are appropriating a goddess from wlw. (a goddess worshiped by pagan people that has been adapted as a symbol for wlw, but this pagan blog has been accused of appropriating her?

as well again, many of the people telling them this are not pagan themselves and need to stay in their own damn lane.

bisexuality: it has come to my attention that a crescent moon has been used as a symbol for bisexuality. claiming the moon is for lesbians only is taking away from bi people. (i’m not saying lesbians can’t use the moon. it’s just not ONLY theirs) and some people have pointed out the term “wlw” can include bi people, which it can. but as far as i’m aware (i wish I could add links) the moon is a symbol that can be used by all bi people, and that would include bi men, bi nb people, as well as bi women who are not attracted to women.

as for “will you stop?” will i stop what?
will i stop calling the moon my boyfriend? no, probably not. it’s been a joke between my friends and i for ages and i don’t want that to end.

will i stop “stealing memes” ? i never stole any.

will i stop “telling wlw not to use a symbol they have been using” ? yes. if i have made this come across as me being against lesbians using the moon, i apologize. wlw are welcome to call the moon whatever they like!

will i stop “trying to make the moon an (ace/male/trans/demi) thing” ? again this was not my intention to make the moon a “thing” for any of the identies my original post stated. i’m sorry that it came across this way.

if i have said anything explicitly lesbophobic, (for example, i wrongfully implied that lesbians who had previous relationships with men were bi, someone messaged me to point out where i went wrong so i could fix it) i apologize,

please feel free to message me and we can sort it out civilly.

(civilly doesn’t mean anonymous death threats, dogpiling, replying after blocking, suicide baiting, or misgendering me)

thank you.

on r*yharpers/l*gorobin aka solo/roy

( tw: inappropriate sexual behaviour/mentions - racism - manipulation - children - anti-blackness )

i’m getting tired of getting asked about this because every time i just have to remember every thing he did and now he cries about, or pretends to be a victim about nevermind the fact i talked to him about it extensively. so like, i don’t really have any “receipts” on him besides other people who i don’t want to imply unless they want to imply themselves (feel free to do so)

so you can call me a liar/bitch/whatever you want, idc. basically on the shit he’s done to me and my friends it’s:

  • being sexual in an environment supposed to be for minors (he also didn’t start tagging his nsfw posts until his ex asked him to, and this was after i confronted him about being too sexual around kids. this started in the supertwitter rp (a rp supposed to be safe) where he posted a picture of an uncensored dildo, and even before that he did lots of sexual comments/implications/outright written content)
  •  i have to comment that this is mostly because we’re from a groupchat that was made as a safe gc for people that like dc comics, since people who knows about it know.. how complicated it is to enjoy without running into bad people. i am also 18+, and so is my girlfriend, however we make a clear border between us and the kids as it’s more of the purpose of being able to protect them if they’re attacked (again). meanwhile solo constantly interacted with them as if he was also a minor, which is another reason said minors didn’t want to be around him.
  • he’s racist, which also showed in the supertwitter. major ones is the fact that when the admin of the group, who is not white, called him out on his racist drawings and also on him wanting to rp a jewish character when he’s not jewish (no matter what he says), he ranted to me until i said they (the admin) were right, and then he ranted to a non-white minor as to get validation. now he’s iding as a jewish character, harley quinn. on a minor note, he disregarded dick grayson being roma and has admitted to never actually meeting a black person irl. he also sent me white-guilt asks which, um, yikes lmao, especially since he tried to use me as an emotions-bin just because i’m black-latinx.
  • he also uses his emotional trauma and mental health to attack other people, even those with mental health issues (including me)
  • he’s manipulative towards minors. after i told him this and he blocked/softblocked me, he started talking to minors asking them if they ‘hated him’ and he even said to many of them that he wouldn’t know how to deal with it if they stopped being his friend/implicated that he needed them to stay his friends despite knowing they’re minors. 
  • he also vagued about me and about said minors after they expressed discomfort and cut contact with him. i don’t have a picture of what he said, but i screenshotted my post (first picture under the cut) about calling him out on it because he had blocked me, before he asked me to deleting the post (after lying he’d work on it, which, he didn’t.)
  • he posted once that he should be able to act the way he wanted around minors because he’s emotionally/through trauma a minor (and by ‘whatever he wanted’ he means being sexual/making kids uncomfortable).
  • also idk if this is problematic but three kids felt so pressured by him linking his wishlist in said chat (and on his blog.. over and over and over) that they bought him things due to that reason, and they told me this personally… i think it’s important to highlight.
  • also after i said i wanted him not to talk to me nor interact with people around me, he constantly tried to get in contact with me and even went so far as to message my girlfriend. he also wrote posts implicating i’m attacking him with this information when i talked to him about it. (also this is more personal but he accused me of lying and being an evil person for ‘lying about being his friend’ which um i never did and we never talked, he just made me uncomfortable.)

tl;dr solo has done a lot of shit that he consistently refuses to recognize, and while he posts and says he’ll work on it, he does it by constantly making excuses for himself and crying about it, as to make the person calling them out the ‘bad guy’ (and tries to manipulate other people into hating said person too), then continues doing the same thing over and over. 

also another thing.. that’s unfounded and i don’t know.. if it’s wrong but there’s a lot of people who have DID who have told me personally that he’s most likely faking his DID, since he started iding as roy harper around the same time he started dating mav, who id’s as jason todd (for those not in the fandom, it’s a popular pairing). also he’s dating his alter which is apparently not a common thing/something people with DID do? (also he used to be really insistent, even to a point of erasing other people’s sexuality/validity, about being gay and his alter is a woman… feel free to message me about this and i’ll delete this part of it if this is ableist in any way

edit: “i’ve seen people w/ did date headmates. it happens. what doesnt happen is you realize yr a system and start dating yr headmate withing a few months. that’s weird as hell tbh. as someone in a system: the fuck man. personally i think his system is fake but i wont say that on record bcos i have no real evidence. i just… no one ever goes through all that so fast. it took me YEARS to be comfortable w/ being a system and i still dont have it all figured out and hes dating his headmate in like 2 months? k”  “ just yeah… system shit is complicated but he had nv heard of systems when i strted dating him and like…. it happened so so fast i have a hard time believing its real. i told him i was part of a systme and he was immediately part of one too, i told him i had bpd and he immediately had it too…. i get not being aware of everything but it was weird” (this is by mav, his ex, who gave me permission to upload this. he has DID).

i talked to him about this, several times- the last time i did he blocked me everywhere, then unblocked me when i accused him of doing so- i had a long conversation to him in which he said he would ‘work on it’ before blocking me. and then i got told by a friend of mine that he went into another chatbox and tried to manipulate people into hating me by showing them screenshots of what i said. which, thankfully, didn’t work. (i have pictures of this under the cut, too.) something to know is that i used to id as a trans guy and went by ‘gabriel’ or ‘leo’ then, so some screenshots allude to that.

also he was a fucking shithead to mav, his ex-boyfriend, and mav actually posted about it here so you know, make of that what you will. tw: sexual harrassment, racism, anti-blackness… )

also there’s more stuff that also goes beyond what he did to me and my group of friends that said friends screenshotted. 

screenshots + more things he’s done under cut.

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“part of your world~”

so this happened

now remember when i said i had ALOT of aus well haha… this is one of em.

though i think mine is a bit different from other little mermaid aus, unless someone thought of this too. okay letteh me explain

dipper = Ariel (obviously)

Mabel = Flounder/ all the sisters (technically mushed into 1)

Pacifica = Sebastian (yep pacifica not tad haha!)

Stan = king Triton

Ford = (we’ll call him co-king BUT) Queen Athena

Gideon = Grimsby (the butler)

Bill = Ursula/ AND the prince (YOU WEREN’T SUSPECTING THIS ONE HUH??! okay maybe u did)

Eight ball and teeth = The eels

Tad = scuttle ( but he’s more like the greek siren aka harpie)

okay now for the story

okay dipper is ariel so blah blah blah he wants to go to the surface BUT WHY?! because he found a book where the pages and the ink was made with maaaagic. a book telling about the surface, he got curious and went up and down from the surface and back much to the dismay of stan (he doesn’t want dipper to go up to the surface because ford died in a ship crash (OR DID HE?!))

mabel always loves to follow dipper on his adventures around the sea as he collects “treasures” from the surface, sometimes they even miss they’re shows that pacifica likes to schedule. much to stan’s dismay (cause he gets money from the shows)

one day there was a storm and a ship and boom! the ship sinks Prince Bill cipher drowning in the waters, dipper (who was looking at the ship very very closely while the crew partied) saves the prince (even though he didn’t need saving) when  bill was brought up to shore, he pretends to be unconscious as he hears dipper singing to him and then he peeked one eye open curiously but woe is him, dipper noticed and scrambled back into the sea in a blushing fury.

he was undoubtingly smitten to the mermaid

and so on and so on, bill was in fact not only a prince but he was also a sea demon granting the wishes of the merfolk (FOR A PRICE AHAHAHAHA) but he wanted to find out more of this merman who saved him, so he got his eels eight ball and teeth to search for him. they  find him and they also find out that dipper is in fact a prince.

so the bill plotting intensifies. he wants the kingdom AND dipper in one go. so when dipper goes to his lair, he wears a cloth with a picture of an eye drapped over his head. so dipper doesn’t recognize him so when he found out that dipper was in fact in love with him. he becomes suuuuper hypey.

blah blah blah things happens, bill goes from smitten to being in love and he almost blew his shot at the kingdom by almost kissing dipper in the lagoon. helped by the singing of mabel and pacifica (with the side of tad but he has a bad voice unlike other sirens)

and the blah blah blah tad find out that Bill is the prince when he sings in front the mirror and he sees bill’s octopus form. bill in the end does become king of the sea for like a few minutes before the mystery twins beat him by mabel throwing a spear at bill while dipper distracts him.

but happy ending though as bill in his octopus form is washed out on the sea shore, he wakes up and cries (in a manly way). dipper sees this and continues to look towards bill.

stan looks towards dipper and with a sigh grants him legs which he uses to run towards bill.

none of them knowing that ford was in a dungeon below the castle grounds, chained and shackled.

;p

Brace for Impact

If the BAU team is busy catching bad guys, who is flying the plane? And how does this pilot fit into the dynamic? Reid seems to want to fit her a little closer to his heart. Oneshot with just some fluff and feelings. No warnings! Unless his beautiful eyes physically pain you like they do with me. 

Inspired by this wonderful post!

Masterlist

With a groan that bled into a curse, Dai rolled from her bed to answer the call of nature. The trail of unseemly words came when she registered another call, two in fact, both from Aaron Hotchner.

She hit redial while she danced around the room to find a clean jumpsuit for use. The one she eventually located under her pile of CD’s had an oil stain on the shoulder, so she settled for tying the sleeves around her waist and letting that server as a belt to the baggy bottoms. The BAU team would have to deal with her disheveled state, though the messy haired boy she had her eye on often appeared looking like he had rolled right out his adorable goddamn bed.

“Enjoy your sleep?” Agent Hotchner answered.

Keep reading

Juno Quotes for the Signs
  • Aries: "Yeah, I'm a legend. You know, they call me the cautionary whale."
  • Taurus: "I never realize how much I like being home unless I've been somewhere really different for a while."
  • Gemini: - "That's a wise choice because I knew this girl who like had this crazy freak out because she took too many behavioral meds at once and she like ripped off her clothes, and dove into the fountain at Ridgedale Mall and was like, 'Blah I am a Kracken from the sea!.'"
  • - "I heard that was you."
  • Cancer: - "I'm going to really start looking like a dork soon. Will you still think I'm cute if I'm huge?"
  • - "I always think you're cute. I think you're beautiful."
  • Leo: "Look, in my opinion, the best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you, the right person is still going to think the sun shines out your ass. That's the kind of person that's worth sticking with."
  • Virgo: - "Wow your shorts are like especially gold today."
  • - "My mom uses color safe bleach."
  • - "Go Carol."
  • Libra: "Yeah I came as soon as I got that ultrasound goo off my pelvis. It was crazy actually, my step-mom verbally abused the ultrasound tech and we got escorted off the premises."
  • Scorpio: "Well, honey, doctors are sadists who like to play God and watch lesser people scream..."
  • Sagittarius: "I'm gonna stop wearing underwear. Raise my sperm count."
  • Capricorn: "I need to know that it's possible that two people can stay happy together forever."
  • Aquarius: "As boyfriends go, Paulie Bleeker is totally boss. He is the cheese to my macaroni. And I know people are supposed to fall in love before they reproduce, but - I guess normalcy isn't really our style."
  • Pisces: - "You're, like, the coolest person I've ever met, and you don't even have to try, you know..."
  • - "I try really hard, actually."