NOT MY SUICIDE NOTE
I have no secrets,
only words you don’t want to hear.
Darling, it’s okay if you never hear them.
I am my own witness.
Little miss martyr,
there is one person
I will always be able to help.
I will keep her safe, and soothe her.
I will teach her all that I’ve learned.
I haven’t had pineapple juice in such a long time.
Tastes like happy. Tastes awake.
And the beauty of the sunset is always deeper than you can drink
and each of your fingers is a key to your unknown home
I am not myself forever.
I am the hundredth rewrite of a poem
with none of the original words in,
I will never be perfect and seldom be published,
but I am the poem I need today.