a/n: remember that time i posted a long list of fic ideas n stuff i was writing and this wasn’t on it? oops! this was originally gonna be a oneshot but things got way out of hand so, please forgive me for taking two months to write a 12K part one, i know i’m garbage. the next part will have a lot more angst so prepare yourselves, and once again thx @mysoftae this would never have come to fruition without you ;(
~ in which your ridiculously hot, annoying brat of a roommate keeps you up at all hours of the night, takes up all your space, is essentially trying to ruin your life, and is intent on sticking his dick in you
You had always liked living alone.
There were no one’s dishes to wash but your own, you could play your music as loud as you wanted, the only person you had to worry about your cat liking was yourself, nobody could complain about what spices you stunk up the place with, and most importantly, you never had to wear pants.
You would have been content to live alone for the rest of your sad, lonely life enjoying nothing but those small pleasures.
Then one day there was Jeon Jungkook, on his knees, hands clasped beneath his chin, looking up at you with those wide, glittering brown eyes of his. Maybe you would have said no if he hadn’t been blocking you up against the door to the library, if there hadn’t been a line of people building up behind him complaining about the two of you being in their way, if he actually would have moved when you grabbed his shoulder and tried to shove him to the side with all of your strength. That kid had been working out a little too much.
Also, he was begging. That might have had something to do with it.
Not an ask but seriusly Say Optimus or Megatron are, ah, whale sized, and fell for a human. The said human lives on land, little bit further from the beach, and they have yet to create a human-sona, but they really, really wants to meet the human Just imagine how many times the beach people have to push these beached whales back to the sea. Like "Great beings of sea and storms, why the fuck you keep doing this"
Summary: Your dreams of kissing your small town life goodbye are about to come true when an unexpected detour leaves you stranded. Meeting the handsome local mechanic has you rethinking your plans. Perhaps happiness is less about where you’re headed and more about the people you meet along the way.
A/N: You guys. This fic has taken on a life of its own and I’m oddly okay with it. Once upon a time I planned 3 parts, then 4, and now it’s 7. :D Oops. That’s what I think, anyway. Who knows? Not me, apparently. ha! I really hope you’re loving Mechanic!Bucky as much as I am!! Any feedback and comments are appreciated. Love you guys!!
Reaching your room, you flicked on the tv mostly for background noise and took a hard look at the detailed budget you had written up for your trip. Paying for 3 days in a motel and adding the car repairs, your wallet was taking a hit, but Bucky’s willingness to lower the bill would definitely help. You were grateful to this kind stranger and the thought of spending the whole day with him tomorrow was strangely exciting. Surprised to feel a few butterflies flutter in your stomach, you shook your head to clear away the feeling and got ready for bed.
I’ll be gone in a few days, you told yourself as you drifted off to sleep.
Morning came and luckily your body woke you around 7am because you’d neglected to set an alarm. You hopped in the shower and then rummaged through your duffel for something comfortable to wear that you wouldn’t mind getting dirty. Slipping on a pair of shorts, a t-shirt, and sneakers instead of your trusty sandals, you pulled your hair up away from your face and headed out the door with an apple in hand.
Canonverse: Phichit being the BEST YouTuber alright the best
WHO ARE VIKTOR AND YUURI DON’T KNOW DON’T CARE, PHICHIT IS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE.
I’m kidding, cause obviously Victuuri is my life, but yeah, Phichit is the best. For headcanon happy hour.
–Phichit starts off very young. Ironically, this is also when he’s at his most professional. His first videos are mostly Junior competitions. He posts one (just one!) video of him with a hamster on the ice, in a homemade padded hamster ball, and the small taste of sweet internet fame it provides is enough to push Phichit into becoming a professional YouTuber.
–Phichit has a whole series called “But In Thailand We…” and it’s basically Phichit attempting something that went terribly wrong for another poor Youtuber and instead ROCKING it. “They do this,” he says, gesturing to some poor idiot who’s trying to learn how to breathe fire but instead just demonstrates how to catch nearby shrubbery on fire. “But in Thailand we…” Phichit lights up the sky with a column of FIRE! It’s grace, it’s beauty, Phichit is a miracle-worker. He is the perfect son of Thailand.
Celestino unfortunately finds out about this series and shuts it down before Phichit winds up in the hospital… well, more accurately, after Phichit ends up in the hospital once.
–”Please go with me to this pole dancing class,” Yuuri whispers, because OH he desperately wants to learn because everybody loves pole dancers Phichit can you imagine maybe someone will look at me once with lust in their eyes…
“Why,” Phichit says, “when there are youtube tutorials?” Except he looks… and there are none that are satisfactory. “THE WORLD IS DEPRIVED,” Phichit declares. He goes to the pole dancing class. Much to Yuuri’s embarrassment, he tapes the pole dancing class. “I am an international hero,” Phichit announces when the video drops, with his and Yuuri’s faces barely blurred out. At least one comment agrees with him. HOT BUTTS, is essentially what the other million comments say.
–Phichit has an advice vlog. He has a makeup vlog. He has a cooking vlog. This means that some days Yuuri walks into the kitchen only to find the camera rolling, something purple boiling a pot on the stove, and Phichit assuring some woman that she is “very lovable, Karen, don’t undervalue yourself. I have a friend that does that, and he’s always wrong.” Phichit can put on eyeliner one handed. Sometimes, Yuuri is terrified of him. Sometimes is always, actually.
–Phichit has an entire video series called “He’s Not My Boyfriend Please Stop Asking.” It’s a compilation of Katsuki Yuuri, and half the videos are him eating while making unholy noises. The other half are him ignoring hot, half-naked people swarming him as he and Phichit explore the streets. “Katsuki Yuuri doesn’t notice when everyone else is chasing tail,” Phichit sighs.
Yuuri stops walking. “Is that a dog??” Phichit squints. There is maybe– MAYBE– something, hanging out of an alley twenty feet away, that resembles a dog tail. Adjusting his glasses intently, Yuuri speeds by two flexing men and a woman who is clearly running only for Yuuri’s benefit. “Phichit!” He calls delightedly, “it is! Come videotape it!”
“Katsuki Yuuri sure can chase some tail, though…dog tail.”
“Oh?” blue eyes blinked at her brother as he blurted this out of pure nothing. Very Jacob. “Well, thank you. Even though I always thought you are the best hugger, brother mine.” Small smiled appeared on her full lips and maybe some pinkish color were raising on her cheeks too.
It had been a painful thirteen hour shift and you had been just about ready to fall asleep behind the register, but you managed to pull through. The minute you had closed up shop and stepped out into the chilly night, you had become very conscious of the lack of human activity in the street. Looking around, the only life you saw was that of a stray cat, owner of all it surveyed. The clothes shop on the right and the bakery to the left were already closed. In fact, every other store seemed to be closed. Up and down the street, security shutters were in place and every shop light had been turned off. Usually on a Friday night such as this one, it was perfectly normal to have the shops lock up late, thanks to all the last minute shoppers, but it seemed that tonight that was not the case.
Not only were there no customers, but there seemed to be no nightlife what-so-ever. Where were the people heading to the nightclubs and the like? It was barely 9 PM and you had never seen it so quiet.
“Odd, isn’t it?” You murmured to the babe you had securely fastened against your chest. She merely babbled in reply and turned her head to stare down the street.
A devilish screech issued from the security shutter as you pulled it down. Your daughter wiggled around in discomfort, disapproving the unholy noise. It sounded awfully like how you’d imagine an animal would scream during a ritual slaughter - and wasn’t that a cheery thought to have while standing alone in an empty, dimly lit street that looked like something out of an old slasher film.
Taking out your keys from the back pocket of your jeans, you fiddled with the sturdy lock until it clicked. Pulling at it, you made sure it was properly locked before making your way down the wet pavement, your walking pace slightly hurried in the hope to get home as quickly as possible. With one hand wrapped around the baby carrier out of habit, you clutched the other around your green faux leather handbag in a death grip, just in case some a-hole of a mugger got any ideas. You’d fight with the furiousity of a madwoman to maintain possession of the few dollar bills that you had in your purse.
As you walked down the street, your black ballet flats tapping against the tarmac, you could feel the warmth of your daughter’s steady breath against your chest, where she had snugly nuzzled her face against as she drifted off to sleep. Her head, a crazy mess of curls that had yet to be rubbed bald, wobbled against your breast, but even as you rushed across the street - avoiding a lone taxi - she did not stir.
Soon you turned a corner and found yourself walking along a still river, solar powered garden lights running along the length of the sidewalk, separating you from the park’s freshly mown lawn. But you weren’t looking where you were going and almost walked, baby first, into the oncoming pedestrian.
Yelping in surprise, you jumped back before sandwiching your daughter between yourself and the man in front of you. Reaching out, you grabbed his arms to steady yourself and the baby.
“Sorry!” You exclaimed, surprised that your daughter still hadn’t woken up, even with the commotion of the almost collision.
Your legs froze and your stomach did flip-flops as you dragged your eyes up from your daughter’s face to the man in front of you. It was Bucky Barnes; the handsome bloke who had taken a shine to your daughter merely two weeks ago in the very same park that you stood in now. You hadn’t forgotten a single moment of your last encounter.
He looked the same as he did then, only he wasn’t wearing a sweaty tank or baggy pants this time. In their place was a heavy grey coat and a pair of well fitted black jeans. And his hair wasn’t up in a man bun - it was loose. And either way, he still looked like sex on legs.
“Bucky,” You gasped, letting go of his arms and straightening yourself up. “What are you going out here so late?”
His eyes connected to your for one glorious second before they dropped to the ground as he shyly rubbed the back of his neck.
“Night walk.” He said, “How about you, (Y/N)?”
You marveled at the way your name rolled off his tongue. “Just left work. I’m heading home.”
Bucky looked surprised. “You’ve got a job that lets you take your daughter?”
“Yeah.” You grinned. “My boss - I’ve known her all my life and she’s kind enough to let me bring her with me.”
“Huh.” Bucky chuckled, his eyes looking back up at you from the sleeping babe against your chest. He stepped forward and offered his arm. “May I walk you home?”
Your heart thudded against your chest like a jackhammer. “Don’t you have somewhere to be?”
He shrugged and gave you a sweet smile. “Not really.”
You returned his smile and looped your arm with his, feeling the coolness of his metal limb underneath the cotton of his coat. “In that case, you may.”
My neighbours for putting up with my daily choruses of History Maker, my screaming, my fangirling, my singing, the unholy noises I made while watching episode 7, 10, 12, Welcome to the madness and Yuri on stage and all the times you heard “VICTUURI!!!!!!!!!!!! AJFNCJSMDJZNCBS”, “OTAYURI!!!!!!!!!!!!! AJDJCKCIDSJCHCHXH” and “OMG, YURIO!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
And you guys for putting up with it through your screens
• son of hades, god of the underworld, riches and the dead • probably the most emo boy you will ever meet • tries to stay away from the camp and people because he’s like I am trouble I bring death and destruction and i can’t be near any humans ever • because he’s convinced he’s the reason his mother died • and he only stops believing It after he talks to his dad who explains the entire demigod thing to him and helps TY realise he is a good person • he still thinks he’s the worst all because of the hades kid stereotype that exists • but he’s actually really sweet and just wants to help • and starts to realise he is not even close to a monster when he’s attending camp for a while thanks to his friends • besides looking like the definition of an emo and thinking everything bad that’s ever happened is his fault TY is not at all like a typical hades child
Summary: phil and dan never met in 2009, so phil is a very successful youtuber and dan is a very smol youtuber, so dan works at a pizza place to help support himself. dan is a very big phil fan.
Warnings: makeouts, GR1ND1NG
A/N: i need to go to church … thank u ninchuser for readin this through have an unholy 4k words
Dan’s noises were like a symphony and Phil was the conductor as he let his teeth graze over Dan’s jaw and finally latching down onto his neck. He sucked, first lightly and then with more force as he left a mark on Dan’s neck. There was something in Dan’s soft, sweet skin that was addictive to Phil and he didn’t ever want to not taste it.
Jack- Jack’s kisses are always cute. When he really wants to kiss you, he’ll work for it by doing cheesy couple things. He’ll pull you out into the rain to dance in the puddles and tug you into an unexpected kiss. His favorite spontaneous moment was once in a park, he hung upside down on the monkey bars and kissed you upside down, Spider-man style.
Dr. Schneeplestein- The good doc kisses fast. Not short or rough, just fast. He’ll dive down, often not giving you any sort of warning, and capture you lips in quick kisses. Half of the time, he’ll abandon your lips to pepper your face with sweet pecks. He loves to show you the attention you deserve.
Antisepticeye- Anti is emotional. He craves attention and respect. So while he genuinely cares about you, his kisses reflect these wants. He wants you to beg his name. He wants you to need him. Often he’ll glitch in front of you and yank you to the nearest surface, whether it be a wall, or counter, or desk, anything really, and lean over you, smirking. Your eyes, wide with surprise from his sudden appearance, will travel from his eyes to his lips. You know his game and you know how to play it. The second his name falls from your lips, he is on top of you. lips pressing roughly against yours in an intense and heated kiss, often including biting. Your hands find his hair, tugging at the green strands while his grip your waist in an often bruising grip.
Chase Brody- When Chase kisses you he gets very excited and enthusiastic. After what happened with his ex-wife, he just wants to show you just how much he loves and values you. His hands cup your face as he tilts your face up to meet his lips in a happy kiss. This enthusiasm often leads to accidents as he typically knocks the two of you over. You never complain as he always breaks the fall. Then the two of you are on the floor, kissing and giggling and being happy together.
Mark- Mark is a passionate guy, so kissing him his always emotion packed. It starts sweet, he’ll give you a grin with a playful gleam in his eyes. He may even spout a cheesy pick-up line just to make you laugh. And then he’ll kiss you and it is wonderful. You can feel the love and adoration on his lips as they press against yours. His hands gently, but firmly, grasp your waist, tugging you closer to him.
Dr. Iplier- Slowly. Very slowly. He savors every single moment you lips are on his. As a doctor, he is very familiar with the reality of death. Often times he has to tell patients they are dying. His biggest fear is losing you so he treasures each moment with you. He adores the feeling of his lips moving softly against yours, he loves the intamateness that each kiss holds.
Wilford Warfstache- You can never, ever kiss this man in public. While he loves kissing you anywhere and everywhere, on the train, in stores, random places in the ego mansion, you are forced to avoid it because when Wil kisses you, he not just looking to kiss you. He always wants to take it up a notch. He will start out innocent enough, until he begins to let his hands roam downwards, and he deepens the kiss by pulling your body flush with his, he’ll deepen the kiss and run his tongue across your bottom lip or move to your neck or collarbone. The unholy noises he is able to elicit from you is unreal. And so in public you mist avoid them at all cost.
Google IRL- When Google first kissed you, you expected it to be robotic or mechanical. You were surprised to find just how good at kissing he really was. Being the internet meant he had unlimited knowledge of just about everything, including kissing so he knew the science behind the action. And he applied it very well. They were just the right amount of playfulness, intensity, intimacy, and passion. Every single kiss would be different as he would adjust his style to suit your mood.
Bingiplier- Kissing Bing is like kissing sunshine. He’ll pull a super cheesy move (unironically) like pulling you into a dance and with a dramatic spin to his chest, he’ll kiss you sweetly. It is always as if the two of you are the only person in the room.
Darkiplier- Dark will not kiss you unless it benefits him somehow. Whether that be to satisfy his craving of you, to keep you buy his side, or put himself in a position of power in front of others. But when he does kiss you, he is sure to ruin you for anyone else. He is sure to leave you craving for him more than ever. You are his and no one is going to come between the two of you. Dark wants conrtol more than anything and he knows how to bring you to your knees. He’ll start with his words, the honeyed speech fell from his lips in that impossibly smooth, baritone voice of his. He’ll stand so close you can feel his breath and he places a finger under your chin, tilting your head up to meet his eyes and then his lips. Good, god is he good at kissing. His lips move in such a tantalizingly seductive way that you can’t help but fall under his control.
Hi! As an ace person I often find myself coming across not understanding the motivations of a character. Take dry spell for example, I just don't get why he/she are feeling irritated, and I always thought it was an exaggeration or something because it sounds f**king fake to me. Do you have this kind of experience?
Friend, the amount of things allosexuals tell me are Real Things that sound fake to me could fill an entire football stadium. I occasionally have small existential crises at my allosexual friends over these things- “So you’re telling me you people really-”
But I’m a writer, and the way I see it, I don’t have to actually have experienced something myself to understand it, or at least to understand that other people experience it. For example, I don’t have to actually take a bullet to understand the feeling well enough to write about it. I don’t have to understand why gravity works to understand what it does. If an allosexual person tells me “I feel angry/irritable if I do not have sex often enough” then I just file that in alongside other behavioral facts I don’t understand like “sometimes cats bolt around the house at 11pm making unholy noises for no discernible reason” and “my 8lb bird will absolutely fight 4 adult german shepherds if I don’t stop her”
If you want to get really technical about things (and I’m gonna probably prove some of my sociopathological issues here, so my apologies in advance), think about humans in terms of bodies. Like, I know what makes humans human is this intangible sense of self that comes from who knows where, but it really can all be reduced to chemicals and electrical exchanges. Human behavior starts with chemical and electrical action in their brains. Certain chemicals make us feel good. Others make us feel bad. Lack of some make us feel bad. Sex causes a lot (a LOT) of chemical reactions in the brain, as does orgasm (and yes, I’m separating the two). For some people, the chemicals created during sex (vs the ones created during orgasm only, which you can get on your own) are something their brain could potentially depend on in order to achieve the particular equilibrium they prefer in order to be happy. So, in your example of a dry spell, yeah, like, maybe their particular brain chemistry is such that it doesn’t have the correct balance of chemicals necessary to keep them happy, and the result is that they are irritable.
And you could apply that type of logic to most allosexual things. Sexual attraction is, at the end of the day, a chemical reaction in the brain. Every single emotion is. And all of our actions are really, you know, instinctual or learned behaviors, and society is set up for allosexuals to learn a lot of different behaviors in reaction to those chemicals signals.
(Self-indulgent and very old) Final Fantasy 7 AU where Jenova wakes up and attacks Zack, Sephiroth, and Cloud at the Nibelheim Reactor, and leaves Sephiroth blinded
It all went wrong…because Genesis didn’t make it. He heard that Sephiroth would be coming to Nibelhiem, but the fucking dragon delayed him. Sephiroth and Zack were free to explore the reactor without Genesis to distract and disturb him. Curiosity made Sephiroth go in deeper and find out what this Jenova thing was. The Shrine in there was bad enough…the dead corpse was worse. Especially when it wasn’t dead anymore.
Jenova made an unholy screeching noise once she was out of the tank. She threw Zack off the catwalk, leaving him to cling to the trusses for dear life as he watch Seph try to fight it off. At first Jenova was convinced she just had to get hold of Sephiroth, but as she wrapped tentacles around him tighter, forced him to look in her eyes…she felt nothing. Sephiroth was…nothing. She screeched again when he got hold of his sword and lopped off a tentacle.
The only reason they survived at all, was because Cloud disobeyed his orders and entered the reactor with Tifa. Cloud heard the screaming from all the way out there. He came in to see Sephiroth being strangled by that…thing. Sephiroth was still reaching for his sword when his world started to fade. He heard Jenova scream one last time before it all went dark.
Cloud was able to kill her while she was focused on Sephiroth. He picked up Masamune and impaled her. He did it again and again until she let Sephiroth go. She toppled over and Cloud dragged Sephiroth as far as he could before going to help Tifa get Zack back up. Zack cut her head off for good measure. It took all of them to carry Sephiroth back down…they knew it was bad before they got there.
It was probably a mix of things: head trauma from being thrown around, the Jenova cell poisoned mako that splashed all over him, maybe how long he went without breathing, or maybe just overexertion, but when Sephiroth opened his eyes, he saw nothing. Outwardly, he took it well, spoke calmly, seemed collected. Zack knew he had to be screaming on the inside. ShinRa tried to blame Zack and Cloud, but Sephiroth denied it each time. Cloud was almost arrested for breaking protocol and destruction of ShinRa property. Sephiroth asked point blank if the alien was more important than SOLDIERs or safety. He made it clear the wrong answer meant he would be taking his chances blind, alone, and away from ShinRa. The fact that he could still hold and maintain his sword helped a lot with his point too.
When Hojo left Sephiroth, Cloud took over. Sephiroth got used to the trooper always being nearby, helping him, but never making him feel helpless. It meant a lot to him. He stopped when he ventured outside. Cloud stopped with him. Sephiroth slowly identified each building and person around him, down to a rabbit hiding in a bush. He couldn’t see them, but somehow knew they were there. He shared this with Cloud.
“Do you think it’s…some symptom of fighting with…it?” Cloud asked.
“Well…don’t take this the wrong way…but I’d much rather you had that ability than…that thing.” Sephiroth agree with him.