unfu

Aozora Clubbing Heart part 2

Plot: Everybody (except Ruby) is shit faced. The night is wild and everybody is lucky Dia is too busy to kill them all.

Pairings:  KananMari, RubyMaru, ChikaRiko, YouYoshiko, Dia x Mystery Girl

SFW: with strong language, adult content [alcohol, sexual innuendos, hot kisses, and a lot of touching] sex happens but it’s not written.

Summary: Ruby cannot believe what’s happening.

7k words

A/N: Still split in everyone’s POVs with some taking longer than others because quite frankly, they were too funny to cut short. Remember this is a college AU and everybody is aged up!


Dia spots a candidate. It’s hard to see well in the club and her beer goggles don’t exactly help, but she doesn’t need much help distinguishing breasts—her only real criteria.

She approaches smoothly, gracefully, working very hard at coordinating her legs and feet. It’s paying off, thank god. She doesn’t trip over herself as she gets close enough that the girl can hear her shy intonations.

“Hi.” Dia can feel her stomach creeping into her throat. The girl glances at Dia with pale blue eyes set afire by the club’s strobe lights. Her features are on point with Dia’s preferences and Dia is quick to admire her long blonde hair, like doll’s hair, left free to fall past her shoulders. She’s tall, but not imposingly so, and Dia guesses she’s probably a few years older than she is. “Are you having a good time?” Dia hopes she isn’t slurring or at the very least that this is actually going as smoothly as she thinks it is.

Keep reading

Part 1: Tokyo Ghoul :Re Ch. 102 (Raw Text Translation)

Title: Big Loop

Narration: Nico who seeks beauty - what is his goal…?

Nico: Unfu *heart*

Banjou: Nico you asshole, how did you find us?

Nishiki: I feel like I’m gonna see your clothes in my nightmares…

Nico: That’s no good! The Pierrots have to surprise people (ghouls)! It’s our job. But if you’re gonna confine one of us, you’d better lock them up tighter than your asshole.

Roma: Ha, hee, heh….

In another room, Roma is sending out tiny little kagune feelers like worms. Nico has one in his hand.

Nico: I felt Roma-chan’s SOS. Hey, look, it’s kagune shit.

He tries to enter the room.

Takizawa: Stay back!

Nico: Oooh, so scary~you’re gonna work your way into my “special place” (heart).

While he says “heart” he grabs his crotch.

Banjou: Do you want Roma?

Nico: Well, Roma-chan… she got herself trapped in Cochlea before, she’s not very smart… But that’s not it. Wheather she’s been beaten up or suffered indignity is of no interest to me.

Inside the other room, Roma is still sending our kagune. “Come on help me Okama!”

Nico: I came her to curry favor with your King.

Banjou: Favor?

Nishiki: He’s not as stupid as to eat the curry of favor from a suspicious person like you.

Nico: Ah, what a lovely Glasses-kun! Maybe I should try to get some favor from you too *heart*

Nishiki: …

Nico looks at Akira.

Nico: Hummph, that woman is gonna die.

Takizawa: !

Nico: Banjou-kun, you’ve never healed a human before have you?

Takizawa: …

Nico: I can tell just by looking.

Banjou: …

Nico: There’s a knack to everything you know. If you just do it haphazardly it’s no good for anyone, unfu *heart* You know, I polished my technique making sure that Yamori’s human prey would give him looooots of time for him to play with them…

Banjou: … (I guess it’s true that he has far more experience in this than me…_

Banjou: Are you saying that you could heal her?

Nico: Nope, but there’s another way.

Banjou: Another way?

Nico: Yes, very simple! You need to take her to a doctor!

Nishiki: HUH?

Banjou: … don’t mess with us…

Nico: Oh no, I’m very serious. Banjou-kun, your methods may be rough but you have fixed her. The problem is her after-care. She needs the excess Rc cells removed from her system. With just this normal treatment she’ll be fine.

Banjou: What do you mean normal treatment…

Takizawa: There’s no way we can take her to a hospital. She protected me, which is against the countermeasure act. If we take her to a hospital she’ll be tracked down.

Nico: Who said take her to a hospital? She just needs a doctor. A doctor who is used to Ghoul bodies… I have two that I can offer you. Number one is Kanou Akihiro. He’s got knowledge of both human and ghoul bodies and could easily help her.

Nishiki: Kanou…

Nico: I can introduce you as a friend of the Pierrots.

Takizawa: Oi you Okama bastard, as if we would co-operate with him!

Nico: Oh, is that so? Depending on the conditions he might work with you, but the degree of safety is bad.

Nishiki: You know that’s impossible for us, so what’s option two?

Nico: Unfu, number two! 

He hands over a business card with “Daikan Akuto Yamamoto” written on it.

How Sugilite Happened (Slight OOC)
  • Sapphire: Ok, so we need to destroy this tower quickly.
  • Ruby: I say we smash it to bits by forming Sugilite!
  • Sapphire: That could end poorly.
  • Ruby: But it would be faster.
  • Sapphire: That is true.
  • Amethyst: LET'S WRECK THIS JOINT! *Sugilite happens*
  • Ruby: Hey, Sapphy, check it out, I'm huge! *flex*
  • Amethyst: Totally! *mental high five*
  • Sapphire: I think we should listen to Pearl.
  • Ruby: We always listen to Pearl!
  • Amethyst: I'm tired of listening to little miss perfect! Thinks she's so much better than us.
  • Ruby: We listen to her all the time, Sapphy.
  • Sapphire: Maybe there's a reason we do.
  • Amethyst: Look over there! I bet we could smash that!
  • Ruby: Let's do this! Woohoo!
  • Sapphire: That rock won't be the only thing smashed if we continue this path.
  • Amethyst: She's right!
  • Sapphire: So let's unfu-
  • Amethyst: We can smash EVEN MORE STUFF!
  • Sapphire: .... *facepalm*
  • Ruby: Come on, Sapphy, we're finally taller than Pearl!
  • Sapphire: Ruby, we're taller than Pearl as Garnet.
  • Ruby: But now we're WAY TALLER!
  • *later*
  • Sapphire: I told you that this would end badly.
  • Ruby: That's what you say about everything.
  • Sapphire: ... So what did you learn from this experience?
  • Ruby: That being Sugilite rocks?
  • Sapphire: ... And?
  • Ruby: ... And that she's dangerous.
  • Sappire: ... And?
  • Ruby: ... That we should have listened to you.
  • Sapphire: Thank you.

WTFFFFF?!?!!!! Some idiots put this sign at a bus stop in a small town in Sicily (Italy) lmma translate it for you.
“IMPORTANT WARNING.
THIS BUS STOP IS RESERVED TO NIGGERS.
ANYWHERE YOU DO NOT SEE THIS WARNING, NIGGERS ARE NOT ALLOWED!
THANK YOU. ”
What the actual F*******K? I am so disgusted I have no words. This is happening in my own country! Had I seen something like that here in Milan… uuuuuh mtchewwww Cannot say how I’d react.
UNFU**ING BELIEVABLE!