Once a boy in my class had to make a presentation about some legend in Latin class, and then he had to explain the part where the two main characters had sex. And everyone knew what was coming and we were giggling and shit (it was middle school, what do you expect?) and he just, completely unfaced by the the rest of us, concluded his sentence with “…and then they fucked.”. Everybody fell completely silent and waited for our teacher to say something. But the guy was pretty chill and didn’t interrupt. So the boy continued with. “And when they were fucking…” At that point our teacher did decide to say something along the lines of: “please, can’t you use a different word for that?”
So the boy sayed “Sure”, thought about it for a second and then went “Screwing, boning,…”
I’m thinking maybe we should just stop searching for answers on where we went wrong. Maybe this time, we should stop tracing the breadcrumbs we left along the way. I’m thinking that by now, we should’ve known that diving into the memory lane might drown us to an endless lane of falsehopes and unfaced fears; that stepping backwards is never the right way.
So instead of holding onto things that don’t want to be held, let go.