G’ys, I am just flooded with Cophine feels rn. Like, I hope everyone watching this show takes a moment to consciously realize that Cosima would absolutely be dead already were it not for Delphine. Also, these two would not fight the way they do if their love were not real or their situation were less stressful and dire. But mostly, like, I know that if someone hasn’t been through traumatic experiences, they don’t know how much getting love, tenderness, and solidarity from someone during that time actually means.
Like, Cosima has been having a fucked up experience on an epic scale. Sometimes people are like, oh Cosima is so sheltered, like Sarah is fighting in the streets and Helena is even worse off. But like, this person found out she was patented by a corporation, knows they are directly responsible for creating her illness by design, knows exactly how she’s going to die from that illness, knows how difficult and unlikely finding a cure will be, believes she can overcome that challenge, and she is coughing up blood and slowly suffocating more as time passes. Like, that’s not external, fighting action drama. That’s another kind of conflict and suffering. But like, Cosima’s situation is fucking terrifying and overwhelming, and she is as brave as Sarah and the others.
Imagine Cosima trying to orchestrate events from within the Dyad without Delphine telling her she has leverage and exerting her own along with it. Imagine Cosima getting that experimental, invasive stem cell treatment without Delphine. I know, like, the show is saying they’re soulmates and Delphine is tied to Cosima’s will to live and whatever, and that’s cool. But, like, on a purely rational level, the freak, coincidental miracle of finding this one person with this unique love and solidarity with Cosima in this particular position at the Dyad actually gave Cosima a chance to live, find a cure, and change the game.
What goes wrong in this relationship is all about conflicting strategies for dealing with power differences created by unequal positions within structures of power. Delphine’s position in the Dyad gives her power over Cosima’s life and her willingness to use institutional power without transparency to minimize harm and maximize the chance of their success conflicts with Cosima’s ethics regarding autonomy. It seems like betrayal and not solidarity to Cosima. Delphine doesn’t get that. And it’s so hard to watch when it blows up!
Delphine felt deep remorse over her own choices only when Rachel outmaneuvered her strategically. Rachel used Delphine’s predictable solidarity with the Ledas to make her an instrument to kidnap Kira, then she took all Delphine’s power to help Cosima away. And Delphine’s response was to have a will to take on even more power when it was offered to her, enough to make a deeply intimate relationship with Cosima impossible. I wish Delphine had spent like half a freaking hour talking to Cosima and stopped Cosima from blatantly lying when she said, “OK. I get it,” when clearly Cosima DID NOT get it and was infinitely freaking upset. Then Cosima failed to use Delphine’s new position to their strategic advantage, until Sarah finally did. Like, why was that not Cosima’s realization to work with Delphine, show runners?
Going into s5, I am hoping this terrifying camp will be a place where these two are finally equal in power, so they can be badasses together against some nemeses. Watching this show, I am saying, please just let these two both survive until they actually dismantle the entire power structure they’re entangled with now. Because, obviously, they will be amazing with each other. In this story, everyone might die every second. They all have to defy crazy odds. Let that end by the end! And don’t make them self-sacrifice to bring it down!