under the carpet

Just a reminder:
Your feelings are your feelings, and any that exist are there for a reason. Try not to sweep your own thoughts under the carpet, for this leaves both your thoughts as well as the external circumstances un dealt with. Care about yourself enough to be able to acknowledge your feelings, regardless of what they may be.

just because it happened at school doesn’t mean it wasnt abuse, doesnt mean it wasnt trauma. teachers, students, administration…all of those can cause legitimate trauma.

it’s incredibly easy for people to get off the hook with abuse at school because the punishment system is he said/she said and the administrator’s word is final. its a system built to wipe records and take advantage of underprivileged students. school can be horribly traumatizing for some kids and their experiences should be validated, not continually swept under the carpet.

VIRGO: So, you’re finally figuring out where the pieces of your life are supposed to fit together and ‘relief’ is a bit of an understatement. There was a time in which your existence felt a lot like trying to finish a puzzle while blindfolded: all of the parts within reach yet, still so far away. But you kept going and you found yourself again and I hope that you’re proud. I hope that when you go to sleep at night you feel comfortable with your decisions and all of the things you’ve been strong enough to overcome. I can’t promise that you won’t find yourself faced with broken things in need of fixing again, but I can promise that you’ll be able to put it back together. You always do.

LIBRA: It seems like every time you leave the house nowadays you brace yourself for impact, which is another way of saying that you’ve had to abandon being soft in order to survive. You’ve had to use your voice to ask for things that your earlier self would’ve shoved under the carpet. And while that’s definitely something to be proud of, the strength you’ve found within yourself, don’t let that close you off to all of the joy that accompanies being kind and open. It’s possible to stand your ground with open palms; asking for what you deserve and embracing the gentler aspects of life aren’t mutually exclusive. They never will be unless you let them.

SCORPIO: I know that it’s hard to refrain from comparing yourself to every person you meet, but you have to remember that not everybody has had the same background as you. Not everybody understands the feeling that comes with being told you’re not good enough, or the feeling of realizing that the people you thought were friends had been bringing you so far down that your back was flat against the floor. You haven’t fallen behind or lost your way just because you’ve had to take a few detours in order to find yourself. You’re trying your best, and your best is more than good enough. Someday you’ll be grateful that you kept on fighting.

SAGITTARIUS: Recently you felt the spark that can only ever mean something is beginning; it’s unfortunate that sometimes this also indicates that another thing is ending. And while that’s typically sad, an event you’re bound to mourn, every closed door is an opportunity to turn yourself around and have an experience that you wouldn’t normally. Eras will end as you continue to grow into yourself, and that doesn’t mean that they’re THE end. Be self-aware and work some more on loving yourself as you embrace these fresh starts and their accompanying lifestyle changes; there’s nothing shameful about being a fan of yourself.

CAPRICORN: One of the hardest things you’ll ever have to learn is that sometimes people leave and there isn’t a reason or a motive behind it, they just go. And that doesn’t mean that you did anything to instigate this, or that you push where others pull; it just means that because of whatever external reason, something wasn’t quite right. There’s no reason to make lists of all the people that you feel you’ve driven away when there are others beside you that are supportive, wanting only to shower you in the affection that you dole out so generously. The way that your peers choose to exit your life is always going to be a choice that they make themselves. You are not a burden.

AQUARIUS: You don’t have to treat every beautiful thing that waltzes into your path as if it’s temporary, bound to disappear as soon as you look away. I know that it’s hard to take good fortune with anything other than a grain of salt after everything you’ve lost, but perpetually being in a state of worry when you have no reason to be so is ridiculous. Your potential for happiness is so much greater than you’re allowing yourself to have. There aren’t limits or rules when it comes to the progress you make and the people you invite into your life. If you spend all of your time walking on eggshells, you’ll never able to leave your mark. Be bold. Be genuine.

PISCES: You’ve been taking happy vibes to the next level lately and that’s nothing to be ashamed of. I know occasionally you start thinking that maybe you don’t deserve to be feeling this light, or that there are more pressing aspects of your life that you should be devoting your attention to, but what you’re doing right now is more than okay. It’s encouraged, in fact. Try not to hold yourself to a higher standard than you would hold the people that you love to. The perfectionist that shows up within you very once in awhile to make unnecessary comments about your progress isn’t the boss of you, you’re the boss of it. Allow yourself to be happy without any strings attached.

ARIES: It always takes time to adjust to a situation that you’ve never been in before, especially when you’re doing it all by yourself. Don’t forget that you’ve seen and conquered cities much bigger than this one. I know that everything in you wants to make a snap judgement regarding whether or not you like the direction you’re walking in, but try to refrain from doing so too soon as it could change your perception of an otherwise lovely experience. Give this road a chance before re-routing and switching courses altogether. Listen to your gut, you know more than anybody else what will benefit you most in the long run.

TAURUS: Are your days really blurring together, or are you so afraid of feeling something new that you’re hiding behind the safety of monotony? Sure, you’re stuck in more than a couple of ways, nobody’s denying that you’ve faced more than your share of quicksand. But something you should consider is how your actions play into that. I think there’s a sort of comfort in being stationary, as you know exactly what to expect, but I also think that you deserve a better quality of life than you’re currently getting and some of the responsibility for changing that rests on your shoulders. Try something new this month and see what happens next.

GEMINI: The heat of summer has peaked and descended and you’re finally able to leave the house without getting burned. This means that it’s time to refamiliarize yourself with your surroundings, because in the midst of life and all its trials I think you’ve forgotten about what’s in front of you. Examining the ground that your feet touch day after day, with eyes that are wise and observant and actually looking, can lead to revelations about yourself. I know that you’ve felt the holes in your life as of late and you’ve been looking for something to fill them, and the materials to do this are closer than you think. You might already be holding them.

CANCER: It’s really easy to overthink your choices when you’ve become accustomed to exposing the soft parts of yourself only to be handled roughly and without the right amount of care. And yet despite your history of hurt you’re still choosing to try again, which says a lot more about you than other people’s actions ever could. Nobody is going to hate you for laying bare your heart and soul, and if they do then that means they don’t deserve to see it anyways. You are allowed to feel proud of your accomplishments and you’re allowed to be vocal about it. Don’t be hesitant with self praise and accepting it from others. Everyone’s rooting for you.

LEO: Your environment lately has been hectic, to say the least, and that’s starting to take a toll on you more than you can probably see. I know that it feels as though you don’t have time to take a break, and that in order to cross-off every task on your never-ending to-do list you need to constantly be on the run, but that’s just your anxiety talking. While time is a constant wave that we’re all riding, that doesn’t mean you can’t lay back and enjoy the view as you float. Caring for yourself will never be detrimental to your progress, as the health of your mind and body are crucial when it comes to success. Give yourself a break for not being a superhero.

The Boys Dormitory
  • In first year, the first time the five boys ever walked into their new home for the next seven years, could have been mayhem. But they had all eaten muchhhh too much food and so the fighting and mucking around was, thankfully kept to a minimum.
  • Sirius immediately dived onto the bed furthest from the door, not even bothering to unpack or undress before falling into a wriggly sleep. James bagged the bed next to him, mostly because it was also next to the window with the best view of the Quidditch pitch. Peter managed to sneak the bed next to James. Remus just lay down and quietly closed the curtains on another bed, far away from any window views that may show a certain grey orb. 
  • The next morning, however, everyone in the room was woken at 5 in the morning by James jumping up and down on his bed and running around the dorm in a nervous/ over-excited state.
  • Sirius tries to keep his bed as messy as possible, it was a strange way he used to piss his mother off at home, but his aristocratic nature glitters through sometimes and some of the boys can catch him plumping his pillows or straightening the sheets occasionally. He also leaves his pyjamas under his pillow each morning but mention it and you’ll get hexed. He is usually pretty good at cleaning up after himself and he always has his clothes in the right places, oh, except for his underwear, for some reason that just ends up everywhere?? under the bed, on the floor, in the shower, in James’ bed??? But other than that and the fact that he keeps trying to do homework in his bed and spills ink everywhere every time, he’s pretty good.
  • You would be proud of James if you saw his area, all nice and clean, nothing lying around… and then you would look a little closer. Every. single. item. he owns is jammed either under the bed, in his trunk, in the bedside table. I mean stuffed, it’s dirty and disgusting and packed full the brim and there is a funny smell coming from one part??? But somehow he just knows where everything is. Quidditch robes? Sticks his hand into the pile at the top of the bed and out they come. Borrow a quill? Sticks his hand into a jar rolled under a mound of unfolded clothes and out comes three. He does it in that way mums do with their purses, because you know.. he’s mum friend™. You don’t need to hide anything when it’s such a jumble only you can understand it.
  • Peter tried to copy James with his piles of shit, but it really stressed him out so he had to go and fold everything after like half an hour. He is the only cleaner in the room, going around picking dirty towels and clothes up off the floor for people. All his stuff organised and well kept and very aesthetically pleasing for some reason? He also always seems to have food somewhere, usually bedside table draw that he will pull out whenever it is needed, which is a lot.
  • Overall our boys do pretty well, nothing too unhygienic, pretty clean considering they are teenage boys.. oh wait I forgot Remus.
  • Remus is a fucking disaster. Like actually helpless/useless. His crap is e.v.e.r.y.w.h.e.r.e… except his bed. Ties on top of beds, shirts all over the floor every time, trousers hanging on the shower, hairbrush where his toothbrush should be, jumper on the outside of the window??? I mean he just can’t even get it together enough to find his own set of clothes because god knows where he threw his shit last night so mostly he just wears James’ school uniform until he is too embarrassingly tall for it and then every morning James has to dive into the shit and pull out Remus’ stuff from under the carpet or tangled in the drapes while Remus lies face down on the pillow and refuses to get up. He keeps his bag nicely packed but that is it. Also used to keep a massive stash of chocolate under his bed but he forgot it was there one day and it all melted and was fucking gross so now Peter looks after it for him.
  • Shower routine is James at like 4am because dis boy does not sleep and goes running when you shouldn’t. Peter is usually next, he gets up in time to have a nice shower. Remus usually doesn’t bother in the morning because he can barely make it to breakfast. Sirius takes a year in the shower every morning but may start crying if you leave without him so you just have to pound on the door and hope he can hear you over his singing. it’s dreadful btw.
  • The boys usually convene on James’ bed but once they are too big to lay on top of each other on it, they make a cute little circle in the middle to sit up and plan pranks/eat snacks with one of Remus’ mini, not flammable fires in the centre of them.
  • James once tried to fly his broom in the dorm on a dare and broke Peter’s bed.
  • Remus once fell asleep on the steps in front of the dorm because.. he is Remus and it was almost a full moon, so the boys just draped him in blankets and left him there.
  • There about fifty stains in places you can’t even imagine all over the room and they were all Sirius.
  • Peter sticks sticky notes and pictures and sheets of parchment all over the walls all the time.
  • There are numerous scorch marks in the ceiling. Enough said.
  • From fourth year they have an ‘if the curtains are drawn don’t open them’ rule because James tried to get into Sirius’ bed to chat about three times without noticing that Sirius was in bed with Remus and was deeply offended that they were scheming without him until he realised they weren’t doing much talking…..
  • there were also many other instances of each of them walking in on each other in very private situations with other people because all four boys were much too comfortable with each other.
  • they then had to instigate a no walking around the dorm naked rule because Sirius kept doing it when there were girls in there.
  • They all carved their initials into their bedposts in 6th year and then went back and added ‘i solemnly swear that I am up to no good.’ on James headboard and ‘mischief managed.’ on Sirius’ in 7th year. it was that lucky guess that let fred and george guess the marauder’s map passwords
  • the window sill is semi-permanently covered in cigarette and joint butts.
  • Sirius left about a thousand lipstick stains on the mirror.
  • Lily kept leaving her shampoo in the shower in the seventh year and Peter liked it so much he wouldn’t give it back.
  • They all share one spray on deodorant for some reason?
  • They had a routine of not going to sleep until every one of them was back. They also said ‘goodnight’ to each other every night with out fail, no matter how bad the argument or problem.
  • They were basically so comfortable, so in-sync with each other that you would have walked into the Gryffindor boys room and thought it was a family.
  • And in a way.. it was.

Click here for my post about the Girls Dormitory!

Picture something for me

Zack can’t think of a suitable word in English for what he wants to say, so out of habit he says it in Mandarin, and of course the others have no idea what he said. He expects them to complain, because his teachers did back when he tried to contribute in class, and starts to apologise

but instead of telling him off or staring at him blankly Billy has out his phone, looking up the meaning, and the other three are over his shoulder reading the translation and description of the word, and once they get it they’re like “Oh yeah totally, I feel that-” and carry on

Zack who takes note of all his friends tiny quirks and needs because he’s so used to looking out for those things being a young carer he does it without meaning to anymore, being totally taken off guard when he realises they’re doing the same for him and making these extra efforts because they love him and he’s not alone anymore. Friends do that, friends do that for the people they care for and he has someone else other than his mother now who does that for him: these four give a shit about him, they genuinely love him and want to know and work with this stuff

I feel like a lot of people focus on how having friends is a welcome, yet surreal change for Trini, but Zack’s the same and I think he gets brushed under the carpet a little


“My name is Meteora.”

She stated, looming darkly over her two unsettled henchmen.
This is Heinous Meteora taking back the wheel of her potentially messed up life and doesn’t look pretty at all. A forgotten daughter who reached her breaking point, with an understandable rage against the sparkling, glittering Mewni, the Kingdom that kept sweeping its problems under the royal carpet for too long, and now they’re coming back in the form a very angry prodigal son daughter.

I don’t know if Meteora is truly going to be the show’s main villain, but I’d like to share my two cents, some kind of theory; the fact that we got to know her as someone continuously hiding her cheek marks, arguably the most distinctive feature of the show’s universe, perhaps with some self-loathing put into here and there, already tells a tragic backstory on its own.

Princess Meteora was the illegitimate daughter of a traitor, born from a marriage that Mewmans definitely considered blasphemy, disgusting, heinous, the latter perhaps being a derogatory term to address the very existence of this “unholy” child, a name which she then took for herself instead with pride and as a way to strike fear into her enemies, that very fear she had to live through for most of her life, and thus she became known as the dreaded Mrs. Heinous.

The reason she was obsessed with hiding her heritage wasn’t out of shame nor spite, but fear. She probably witnessed what Mewmans capable of, how ruthless they can be, terrified of people finding out her true identity and slaying her like the disgusting monster they thought she was. 

Desperate, over time she found new, morally unorthodox ways to conceal her more monstrous side, managing to hide in plain sight for centuries, but this had the terrible side effects of greatly slowing down her aging process and mess up with her mind and memories, in a way that she couldn’t distinguish lies (her own lies) from reality anymore, becoming her own mask.

Like an actual meteor, she wandered for years, lost, doing the only thing she knew she had to do: hide, by any means possible. She may have forgotten her true identity, but not the sheer terror she grew up with, the horror of what they’ll do to her the moment her cheek marks were to show up. And so she kept going, living up to that fake name she chose for herself.

In a moment, however, Meteora was snapped back into reality, as if she had woken up from a dream within a nightmare, a cracking dam suddenly breaking inside of her, a raging flow of memories and grudge taking over her emotions and motivations. Heinous is gone, Meteora steps in, once again embracing an identity society tailored for her: a vengeful monster. They’d treat her as one either way, so she finally chose to prove them right.

Cleaning and tidying is never a fun activity, but with the use of some domestic magick it can become an enchanting and Cleansing experience!

Here are some tips to make your next housework day magickal!

💧add some peppermint or lavender essential oil into your cleaning wash for peace and extra Cleansing

💧wipe down the walls and surfaces with moon water with added peppermint oil. Your space will smell amazing

💧put on some witchy music or music that corresponds with your intent you want in your space

💧burn some incense or oil in a diffuser to cleanse the air

💧 Sage your living areas

💧when you’re sweeping with a broom, imagine that you’re sweeping negative energy out!

💧put on clean bedding and spray your sheets with a sweet Sleep Mist (recipe is on my blog)

💧sweep your windowsills and place crystals that love the sun on them

💧clean your altar space and redo it

💧find vegetable cuttings and biodegradable leftovers you can mix into compost to nourish your plants

💧when cleaning the floor, pour your cleaning liquid in the shape of a sigil. Wipe and scrub to charge and fire!

💧 draw sigils on your dishes with dishwashing liquid before you wash them

💧wash old jam jars and recycle them to hold moon water or spells

💧visualize negativity leaving your space when you take out the trash

💧If you can put chalk on your floors, draw sigils or write messages under your carpets

💧create or renew any wards you have put up

💧Enchant your mirrors to show your inner beauty

Happy Cleaning!


Sherlock S4 fuckiness and the post-its I keep to remind me of it

In no particular order, I present the list of things that are particulary infuriating to me about S4 that I’ve been keeping on post-its by my bedside table the last month in case I lose hope. They are, for me, enough proof for The Lost Special. Today being 8th of March it seems fitting to keep them in mind.

(Disclaimer: this is a compound of theories developed by hundreds of people over a long time and I cannot possibly credit everyone or explain them at this point, so I’ll just list them.)

  • The Importance Of Being Ernest, by Oscar Wilde being quoted in TFP
  • Mycroft-> Lady Bracknell, the baby in the handbag = gun in the handbag (Euros and Vivian Norbury). The baby gets thrown in the Thames?
  • Queen’s I Want To Break Free in TFP stoping at “I’ve fallen in…” (love)
  • Elephant Glass Shock Proof in Euros’s cell
  • The elephant in the Thai menu in Mycroft’s frige
  • Rosie’s elephant toy
  • The elephant in John’s living room
  • The endless horror film references in TFP (many of them being hyper meta, especially Shutter Island)
  • John/Culverton mirror
  • Una Stubbs’ voice in TFP “Softer, Sherlock” instead of Euros’
  • Russian and Turkish leaks with no reaction
  • Over reaction with the promo chess pictures being leaked
  • Promo pictures being very similar to Clue’s movie poster -> Clue’s different endings and the similar final paused shot in TFP
  • The bulding up to Moriarty not making any sense (especially if we take into account M Theory, because he IS alive)
  • TLD having the gun shown multiple times, a smoking gun that is definitely not a tranquiliser gun. The last shot fading with red, like in Bond movies
  • The enormous red carpet under John in the therapist that resembles the blood pool in the market
  • HLV/TLD paralels
  • Martin breaking the 4th wall in T6T noding to the camera while holding the glass of wine
  • SHERLOCK: Romantic entanglement, while fulfilling for other people … JOHN (interrupting): … would complete you as a human being. NO PAY OFF FOR THIS. This mirrors the greenhouse conversation in TAB
  • Why was Molly upset when Euros called in TFP?
  • John/Molly mirror (Molly wearing the same jumper she wore in TEH while taking John’s place, the framing of that hellish shot with John and the coffin cover “I love you”)
  • “John is clearly standing behind him in the trailer, so unless he’s talking to a mirror for some very bizarre reason, I should think not.” -Mark
  • Sumatra/Samarra pointing out to TEH which lead us to The Lost Special and MINDING THE FREAKING GAP->Moriarty
  • “It’s never twins”
  • The camera shown in the hotel in T6T
  • Season 4 DVD not having “complete” like the other DVD’s had
  • Mark’s picture with the 4 fingers raised in Twitter
  • “Has it just occurred to you you’ve been played for an ad campaign” hello Apple Tree Yard  
  • Moriarty at the end of S4 DVD “You didn’t think I would just disappear, did you?”
  • The whole promotion about S4 and the season itself being about hacking
  • Skull Hell
  • Sherlock saving the tea cup and the boy in the hotel in T6T dropping the tea
  • Tea code being confirmed
  • “Is this a new person? I’m against new people.”
  • “You’d be better off with clown outfits. At least they’d be satirically relevant.”
  • Cake=violent death John and Sherlock going to get cake
  • Lady Smallwood’s name
  • Vatican cameos ignored
  • “And boop, they are fine”
  • Sherlock breaks the 4th wall (like in Queen’s I Want To Break Free videoclip)
  • The Garridebs literally cliff-hanging
  • Chekhov’s gun on the promo picture and literally hanging on the wall in the Garridebs scene
  • “People always give up after three” 
  • Blue Power Ranger gay subtext
  • T6T being an old case about a gay couple -> Margaret Thatcher getting smashed, Sherlock not knowing who she is despite the fact that he knew in THoB
  • “Fresh paint to disguise another smell”
  • Mycroft watching his own romantic movie turning into an horror film
  • T6T starting with doctored footage
  • “That’s not what happened at all”
  • “Why does anyone do anything” Norbury/Moriarty
  • “Sherlock, the dragon slayer” (Mycroft, Moriarty and kinda Magnussen have all alluded to this and now Mary does)
  • Shark hell
  • Sherlock’s recurrent dream (?)
  • “Oh, good, I love an acronym. All the best secret societies have them.”
  • “It is what it is” either being followed by “says love” or being a quote by John Locke
  • "I don’t like loose ends. Not on my watch” says Mycroft/Mark, as he holds a pen and looks at the camera
  • #Ohwhatabeautifulmorning tying in with Oklahoma! and consequently with  Green Grow the Lilacs, a play with gay subtext all over that got misunderstood and very famous
  • Steven starting TLS rumors
  • TD-12 being memory corrupting
  • The freaking guy from the official Sherlock Youtube channel teasing TLS and saying “The greatest love story never told”
  • The girl on the plane being the same one from ASiB
  • The TAB-like transition when John faints in TFP
  • The S1 scripts being released for no reason
  • “Childhood trauma masked by an invented memory. Boring!” THoB (person=dog)  
  • Mary’s death not being realistic as pointed in HLV (thank you for reminding me, @antisocial-otaku)
  • The explosion in 221B not having the consequences in the building that   Mycroft foreshadowed and them being perfectly ok afterwards.
  • Where is Ben’s 26 pages scene?
  • What was Ben’s kissy gesture while saying “Very well. It’s going very well” in SDCC all about?
  • TFP as a whole. Too much to analyze there


  • “Love conquers all” 
  • “Groundbreaking”
  • “History making”
  • “Rug pull”
  • Derren Brown

Tags under the cut

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Harry Styles - “Confessions”

I completely left this open(and have already planned) for a part two. So… if you would like a part two let me know! Enjoy! And be ready to have your heart broken.

Part Two - Part Three - Part Four - Part Five - Part Six - Part Seven - Part Eight

Harry sat on the edge of his bed in Los Angeles, his head in his hands, as he tried to hold back the tears and will his breathing to stay even and calm. His phone lay beside him, the screen still lit up to show him his recent calls - the last of which had just turned his world upside down. 

He eventually sits up, letting out a large sigh as his large ringed hands push through his short floppy hair, pushing it back from his forehead. His green eyes look across the room where on top of the chest of drawers sat a picture of the person he cared about most in the world. He stared at your smiling face, his own smiling face next to you and that’s when the tears came. He was going to lose you, he knew that he was. 

Just then his phone began to ring beside him. He dreaded it was her, the person who had called a few minutes before him and broke the news but instead he saw your face appear on the screen and that, in that moment, may have been worse. He picks up the phone, staring down at your picture as the phone continues to ring. 

He couldn’t do it, he couldn’t hear your voice, happy and still in love with him, when he now knew what he did. He couldn’t tell you over the phone. He had messed up, he knew that, and he had to say it to your face. After the phone finally stopped ringing he gave a sigh and pulled himself up and off the bed. 

He had things he needed to do in LA, meetings to attend, interviews to be done but he couldn’t. He needed to get to you and tell you as soon as he could so he called Jeff. He couldn’t say it though, he couldn’t tell him exactly the situation, just that he had to go home - and now. 

Once he landed in London the next day, his hands were shaking, his palms were sweaty and his breathing was shallow as he sat in the back of the car headed towards your house. He kept trying to play out and plan his words for this conversation. How would he go about it? Where could he possibly start? He had so many confessions to make and what he was most afraid of was the inevitable - losing you. He also knew he wouldn’t be able to handle that hurt, devastated, and heart-broken face that he was soon going to see before him. 

The idea brought tears to his eyes. He rubbed the back of his hand against his eyes, grinding away the tears harshly. He hated himself, his entire body was full of regret, remorse, and dread knowing that he could never take this back. 

“Hello?” Harry calls a few moments later as he enters your shared home. He knew you were home, it being your day off work and your car was parked out front but he heard nothing. “Love?” He calls out again. 

“Harry?” He finally hears from the kitchen. He couldn’t will himself to move towards your voice. He wanted to run back out the door to never have to face this situation, he wanted to pretend everything was okay. But it just wasn’t. And never would be again. “Harry!” You gasp once you see your tall, tattooed and handsome boyfriend standing in the entryway of the living room. 

“Hey.” He mutters, barely able to get his voice above a low gravel. He clears his throat and puts his bag down at his feet, sliding off his jacket. He was trying to delay this, anything to keep the truth from coming out. 

“What are you doing home? Why haven’t you answered my calls in two days?” You were full of questions but then in that moment you didn’t care. You had missed Harry so much and if he was home - that was all that mattered. So, you cross the room and burrow yourself into his chest. You wrap your arms tight around his torso, taking in that familiar scent of his cologne while his arms wrap around your shoulders. He buries his face in your hair, his eyes closing as the tears began to slide down his cheeks. This was surely the last moment he would hold you in his arms and he wanted it to last as long as possible. “What’s going on?” You question, looking up at him. You gasp when you take in his tears. “Harry, what is it?” Your mind was racing. What possibly could have happened to cause him to act like this? You reach up, brushing your thumbs under his eyes along the tracks his tears were making. 

“I messed up, love.” He finally says, his voice a quiet whisper as he stares down into your eyes. You frown, shaking your head a bit in confusion. 

“What do yo-” 

“I slept with someone.” The words were out before he could over think it. He watched the gears turn in your head as you processed this. As soon as he saw it click, you backed out of his arms, distancing yourself from him just as he knew that you would. “Please, love, i’ was while we were going through tha’ rough patch a few weeks ago. I was angry, you were angry, I didn’ know where we stood-” 

“So you fucked someone else and never told me?!” You interrupt as your blood began to boil. “You came back here acting like it was all okay?! As if nothing ever happened!” You also felt your heart break, a dull ache began in the center of your chest. Harry was the love of your life, the man you were going to spend forever with and yet .. he had hurt you in the way he always vowed he never would. 

“I jus’…” He scratches at the back of his neck, shaking his head a little as he gave a sigh. He looks at the floor, anywhere but at the hurt and angry face before him. He also noted the fact that your eyes, those gorgeous eyes of yours that he loved so much, had begun to well up with tears. “I don’ know how to make up for this bu’ tha’ isn’t all.” He knew he had to say it, he had to get everything out so just maybe, maybe, the two of you could start trying to work it out. 

“What else is there?” You cross your arms over your chest as the tears slide down your cheeks. What else could there be? Had he slept with her again? Was he leaving you for her? Your mind was racing and you weren’t sure you would be able to handle anymore of this. Harry was your life and even with him standing in front of you still you felt it might not be for too much longer and you already felt lost. 

“She called me yesterday mornin’,” He began, his eyes peaking at you through his lashes as he kept his head slightly down. 

“Okay?” You urged but felt that sense of dread begin to creep up in your head as you surely knew what was coming next. Why would you contact the man you slept with weeks before? There was really only two reasons - wanting to get together again or being pregnant. Your blood ran cold at the latter possibility. It couldn’t be that, it just couldn’t. 

“She’s… she’s pregnan’.” The words pained him to say out loud. He hadn’t spoken it since he heard her mumble it through her sobs on the other end of the phone the morning before. He saw your face crumble then. Your eyebrows furrowed together, your eyes swimming with tears, and he saw your breath hitch in your throat. 

“You got another girl pregnant.” It wasn’t a question, it wasn’t accusatory, it was just a statement as you took to trying to process this. Harry was going to be a father, and it wasn’t with you. This just couldn’t possibly be happening. 

“I don’ know what I’m goin’ to do, bu’ what I wan’ first is to try and make things work with you. Please, love…” He trailed off when you shook your head vigorously, the tears now falling freely down your cheeks. 

“You expect me to just forgive you for this?” You give another shake of your head. “Would you forgive me if I got pregnant by another man? If I cheated on you and got knocked up? Would you be willing to move past that?” Harry bit at his lower lip and stared at the carpet under your feet. He knew you were right, he would probably never be able to move past it if you had someone else’s child. 

“You won’ even try? For us? We’ve been together for-”

“I don’t need you to remind me how long we’ve been together, Harry! I don’t need you telling me about the life we’ve started here together because I remember, I know!” You felt your anger begin to flare up. “It was you that seems to have forgotten the life we have together while you were busy fucking someone else!” He cringes at your choice of wording as well as your now raised voice but he knew he deserved it all. You were of course right, after all. 

“Please,” He takes a step towards you, holding his large hands out towards you, his cheeks wet with his still falling tears. He felt a sob building in his chest as he felt this was it, knowing you would most likely never forgive him. “I made a mistake, I will pay for tha’ for the rest of my life but I need you.” His voice dropped off to a whisper. “Don’ give up on me.” It was then that the sob finally fell from his lips and he felt his knees give out. 

“Harry,” You whisper as you watch the man you loved fall to his knees right there in front of you, his face pressing into his hands as large gasping sobs fell from his mouth. You feel a sob of your own and you take a step closer to Harry. You fall to your knees in front of him and bring a hand up to brush through his brown hair. He lifts his head up, his breath catching in his throat as his eyes meet yours. “I don’t think I can ever forgive you.” You watch his face crumble even more as he takes in your words. 

“I’m so sorry.” He whispers and the sobs resume. He then falls into your chest, his cheek burrowing into your t-shirt and his arms wrap tightly around your waist. You support his weight, your arms going around his shoulders, your fingers brushing at the hair on the back of his neck. “I’ll never forgive myself either.” He whispers through his sobs. 

You sat and held Harry, both of you crying and clinging to one another, knowing that this was it, for a good while until finally you pried him off of you and both of you stood up. 

“I think it’s best if you left.” You whisper as the two of you stood awkwardly facing each other. Harry gives a small nod, closing his eyes for a second. His eyes burned, the tears drying his eyes out but he knew he would probably spend the entire night crying. 

“Can I do somethin’, one las’ time?” You frown at him but he then takes a step closer to you and as his hand comes up to rest on your cheek you understood what he wanted. You don’t move as his face dips towards yours. You try not to return the pressure his lips press into yours but you couldn’t help it. As if by reflex you were kissing him back and bowing your body against his as your arms wrap around each other. It was as the kiss intensified and his tongue slid against yours that the reason this was to be your last kiss together reared back into your mind and you pulled away from him, breaking all contact together. 

“I can’t. I can’t do this, Harry.” You mutter, seeing that hurt and aching look in his green eyes as his chest heaved. He had hoped there for a second as he held you close again, your lips melded together perfectly like they always had, that just maybe you could forgive him. “I can’t be with you, I’m just going to picture you with her every time and I just can’t.” 

“I understand.” He gives a nod, hanging his head a bit. He pushes his fingers through his hair and looks back up at you. “I’m so sorry that I hur’ you.” He stares at you for a few seconds before backing towards the door. “I’ll always be jus’ a phone call away. I love you, with every piece of my soul.” You ignore the fresh tears sliding down your cheeks and simply give a nod. You look away from his heartbroken face and look anywhere but at him as he reaches for his bags and then a minute later was gone from the house. 

You fall to your knees right there where you stood and begin to cry into your hands, feeling like a piece of your heart had just walked out that door with Harry. 

Harry meanwhile had gone into the garage and got into his Range Rover but as soon as he was behind the wheel he rested his forehead against the steering while and let the sobs return. They were loud, chest heaving, sobs. Not only had he just lost the love of his life but he also now had to decide what he was going to do about his child on the way. 


Author: @bread-jinie as part of the Bound series with @knockknocksoosthere and @kpopfanfictrash
Creative Content Contributors: @baebae-goodnight (for this INSANELY GORGEOUS MOODBOARD WOW)
Rating: NC-17
Warning: explicit sex; explicit language
Summary: Jin thinks he’s loved you since the moment he saw you, back when you were teenagers; Jin knows he’s been in love with you, the soul burning kind of love, since he saw you on your wedding day. He doesn’t mind that you don’t reciprocate on his level, he’s just happy to show you he cares. Until one day, he simply can’t anymore. Until one day, you realize you need to show him you care, too. 
Word Count: 16,535

Two days after your fourteenth birthday, your parents agree it is time to tell you that you are engaged.

When they call you into the kitchen, you find they are sitting beside one another - closer than you have ever seen them - and a slow panic begins to course through your veins. In the past, death was the only thing that could bring them together, the fading of a life forcing them into closeness if only to seek comfort in another equally as empty.

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The last time Maryse Lightwood had seen her oldest son in the Institute chapel, he was about to martyr himself into a marriage for their family’s political gain, to find again honor that she and her ex-husband tarnished with decisions made out of delusional hate. Looking back on it now, the pride she felt while seeing him in a golden suit and with barely concealed panic buzzing underneath the neat edges of his sleeves makes her sick. It had been wrong, so very wrong. It had been something a good mother should have never done.

But Maryse has learned a lot since then - seeing her children blaze new trails in the sedentary Clave traditions and rules has taught her how to be better, how to apologize and try to redress past grievances.  She is trying to be a better version of herself, both for her allies as well as her own family, speaking apologies and confessions that should have been made long ago.

And here she is again, in the same Institute chapel, at another wedding. 

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;a fragment (m)

pairing— kim seokjin x reader, warlock! seokjin
genre/warnings— supernatural, smut, some type of fluff, angst, fantasy 
words  22,361

:: summary— Who’s the mysterious guy that’s just appeared in your life and plagued your dreams? He’s been showing up ever since your “friends” convinced you to do a ouija board in the old, creepy house that looks over your town. Your brain tells you to be afraid of him, but your heart tells you something different… Why aren’t you scared of him? You’re intrigued by the handsome stranger, and you want to get to know him better…even if it proves fatal…or eternal

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jd week day 6 - Jonathan in SDC

you’ve tried DILF Jonathan, now try ‘really really hecking old and god i’m starting to get concerned for you’ Jonathan.

tl;dr jonathan didn’t die and is a ripple master that can tell the future and dio keeps bothering him about it. more details on the au under the cut

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Swimming in a portable hole

backstory: so our group has helped out a cult get a special weapon that was stolen from them, after getting the weapon they begin to use it to open a portal to the wyrd ( a special dimension created by a litch to embody all of his creations that would never die) the portal opens under a lake and water starts spilling out into the room quickly, the BB slows time to enjoy our final deaths. Me, a Goliath Barbarian, Anton a Human Sorcerer and Viosa a Dragonborn Cleric try to figure out what to do.

DM (as BB): You know I like to savour these little moments, they always… (BB puts his hand to his ear) wait what? ok wait right there. (to us) well this was fun, I’m Sad I don’t get to see you die…Bye!

Anton (ooc): wait my carpet is like an infinite portable hole right?

Dm: ya

Anton (ooc): I open the carpet and tell everyone to get under it so we are not crushed by the pressure 

Dm: you all cram under this 10 foot carpet and you wait to be bowled over by the water, and just like a waterfall, water quickly fills the room.

Me: wait Anton I can’t swim!

Anton: why didn’t you bring this up earlier

Me: we never had to go swimming so I thought it was never really important

Dm: Wow that is just perfect ok make a Wisdom save

Me (ooc): *rolls an 8* 9

Dm: you start to drown as the thought of having to even be this close to water has you start panicking

Me: (screaming) Anton you’re a sorcerer why don’t you have anything to get this out of here

the party is crying with laughter since this is something they have never seen, this tough massive goliath shreeking in terror as water starts to fill up

Anton (ooc): I cast levitate on the Barbarian

Dm: ok (to me) you start to float up into this lake faster than everyone else

Me: No Anton don’t leave me! (starts to try to swim down)

Viosa (ooc): *face palms* Can I cast sleep on him?

Dm: (surprised) sure uh..make an attack role

Viosa: *rolls a natural 20*

Dm: ok (to me) just as you think you are about to die your whole world goes dark, (to everyone) the water in the lake slowly starts to drain out I want you all to make strength saves except the barbarian cause he is asleep.

*all of the group fails*

Dm: Wow…you are all sucked into the hole and fall for a while before you realize you are not actually falling, but rather floating in space.

Me: *wakes up* (still screaming) where are we!? did we die?

Anton (ooc): can we swim? like move around?

Dm: sure ya you realize you can move a little

Anton: ok everyone I think I see the hole

Me: Again…I can’t swim!

(everyone again loses their shit and the sorcerer spends a good 20 min teaching me how to swim, we make it out of the hole to find we are in a lake bed with all of the water drained)

olliescorner  asked:

HEY! CONGRATS ON GRADUATING COLLEGE! <3 Here's a question: looking back, do you have any advice to give your freshman self knowing things you know now?

ahhhhh thank you so so much! and DO I. i have so many things i wish i knew. 

so you’re about to enter the next chapter in your life. it’s a scary thing, and very intimidating, but here are some tips that can help you. these are some things i would tell myself if i could go back in time: 

  • be comfortable being uncomfortable!
    • you’re going to feel awkward, but that is okay
    • embrace every encounter you have with people 
  • don’t dive into a relationship so fast
    • focus on your studies first
    • don’t let boys/girls distract you from learning 
    • you’re going to want a connection and just the smallest sparks can convince you that you need a person - that’s not true
    • find yourself first
  • dedicate some time each day to studying 
    • study then party
    • breaking up your studying is SO much better than cramming the days before an exam
    • relieves so much exam stress
  • start strong!! 
    • don’t procrastinate from the very start 
    • start off productive and it’d be easier to keep going 
  • don’t turn down every offer to go out with friends/roommate/etc.
    • sometimes, bonding is just what you need 
    • connect with people, don’t hole yourself up in your room forever 
  • just because you were smart in high school doesn’t mean you don’t need to study in college
    • THIS IS A LIE.
    • study your ass off.
    • i’m not joking.
  • join organizations and get involved
    • even if it’s just one 
    • take time to expand your horizons
    • you also can meet new people
  • your friend circle is going to dwindle, but you end up with the people you talk to for the rest of your life 
    • it’s okay if you feel like your friends from high school are growing distant 
    • make new, valuable friends in college
  • choose your friends wisely and minimize negativity in your life
    • surround yourself with people who want to be successful 
    • if you feel any negative energy, leave it/them be and move on 
  • call your parents or someone close at least once a week 
    • it’s a nice thing to talk to someone familiar
    • comforting for those stressful times 
  • get to know your professors!
    • introduce yourself the first couple weeks of classes
    • ask them questions if you don’t get the material 
  • GO. TO. CLASS. 
    • i don’t care if you have to get up at 7am just to go to a class with a professor you hate 
    • go to class and be present
    • just being there lets the professor recognize you and recognize your effort 
  • sit in the front of the class
    • honestly, this is so calming 
    • you have no one in front of you
    • you can slouch, spread out your legs, etc. 
    • the teacher notices you first
    • you don’t have to answer a lot of questions (basically, the prof will call on people in the back rows) 
    • minimized distractions
    • forces you to not check your phone during class 
  • start homework and projects early
    • deadlines sneak up on you 
    • there will be dead weeks and then BAM. EVERYTHING’S DUE INCLUDING YOUR SOUL. 
  • keep a planner 
    • write down every test date/project deadline/paper deadline/etc. 
    • fill it out the first week of school 
    • know everything ahead of time so you’re not blindsided
  • manage your time wisely 
    • don’t spend too much time on things that aren’t productive 
    • try to keep track of your day and how you’ve spent it
  • you’re going to make mistakes, and that is okay
    • you’re going to have some bad grades 
    • just work out what you missed and move on
    • keep working hard
  • keep track of your spending
    • don’t go overboard with meals
    • but remember to eat, too
    • eating healthy in college is super difficult, but there are a lot of ways to do so
  • make good decisions
    • go with your gut feeling 
    • if something feels weird or off, avoid it 
    • don’t drink more than you can handle
    • have a designated driver if you go out, or uber home 
  • conflict resolution saves roommate situations 
    • learn how to compromise
    • don’t make relationships with your roommate(s) sour 
    • talk about problems you guys are having, don’t sweep them under the carpet 
  • don’t ever walk alone at night 
    • find friends that will walk with you 
    • find study buddies that will stay with you during the late nights in the library 
    • have your phone in your hand or your keys if you are walking alone
    • let someone know when you leave a place and when you get home
  • make the most of it
    • take road trips with friends 
    • go to football or other sports games and scream for your school
    • settle into the library and just read for fun sometimes 
    • discover cool places on campus 
    • put up fairy lights in your room 
    • fill in a leadership role

whew!! i guess i should’ve made this a reference post, huh? i can always convert it to one in the future after making a banner for it. anyways, here you go! hope this helps<3 

Planets on the IC

Sun - your remember feeling special. Your family were your audience. You were the star. Spoiled and loved. Golden child. You have very strong sense of identity and belonging to your family. You are very proud of your background and who you are. You needed a place to shine. You needed to express yourself freely. It was very important for your well-being. You needed to be special and your originality and talents needed to be recognized by your family. You grow with very strong ego and the need to be the center of attention. You were too dependent on validation of other people. You were too selfish. You love being important figure in the family matters. You need to be important figure in groups to feel you really belong there. You need to be a leader. 

Moon - you remember security. You were taken care of. Especially emotionally. You had very close relationship with your mother. You were scared when you thought about leaving your home. You were addicted to your home life. It was your safe haven you never wanted to leave. You never wanted things to change. You were afraid of the future.  You didn’t want to deal with the outer world. You tend to retreat to the old memories when you feel threatened by reality. You idolize past. You were a sensitive child, easily influenced by your family. You have hard habits that you developed in your home life. You don’t want to change them. You were moody. You didn’t like to talk about your family because you prefered to keep it private, in secret from the rest of the world.

Mercury - you remember being busy. You were busy with reading. Or writing. You were busy spending times with your sibilings or neighbours. You were mentally busy all the time and you loved it. You needed a lot of mental stimulation. You disliked silence. You were scared of it and didn’t know how to exactly fill the void. Usually when you didn’t have anyone talk to you were just talking to yourself. Out loud. Things always needed to be loud. You wanted to be clever. You always craved to be smarter than the rest. You were afraid that you are not good enough.  There were a lot of nervous energy in the house and in your family. Lot of debates. Lot of diverse opinions. You were exposed to gossips. You were a gossipmonger yourself. You couldn’t stay still. You wanted to talk. You learned a lot from your sibilings and neighbours. Your mind worked like a sponge. You became very smart. You know a lot. 

Venus - you remember superficiality. Lot of superficial problems. What to wear? How do to your hair? What to buy? How to decorate the living room? Your house was probably beautiful. Aesthetically pleasing. Women in your family had big influence on you. There were a lot of gossips and unaddressed issues. Family  put great importance on keeping peace and harmony within the house. There was a lot of passive-aggressiveness. You loved luxury. You loved being spoiled and living like a royalty. You were possesive of your things. You didn’t like to share. You were jealous. You were taught to put importance on outer beauty. You felt you were not pretty enough. Your values were too focused on temporary things. You had to taught yourself how to be confident in who you are not what you have. You had to find the truth meaning of self-worth. 

Mars - your remember fights. You didn’t always win them but you still fought with passion. You felt you had to. It was the only way for you. You felt you were ignored. You didn’t want to be considered weak. You wanted to be in charge of your family. You wanted to matter. You wanted to get involved in the family matters. You were very defensive most of the time and you were always ready to stand up for your family. You wanted to protect them at all cost. You wanted to protect anyone who you considered family even when there was no blood relation. You have a strong will and strong spirit. There was a lot of anger in you that you felt you can’t fully expressed. It left you feel resentful towards some people. You remember your home as a battlefield. 

Jupiter - you remember abundance. You had big ego and very diverse background. Probably you were exposed to foreign cultures more than others. You were in contact with very diverse groups of people. You had rich household - either you were literally very rich of spiritually rich. Religion was a big part of your life. You were living according to religious dogmas. Education was important. Your parents spoiled your ego to the point you could become arrogant. There was too much of everything. You had a lot of luck. Especially through your family. You grow having very strong opinions on religions and cultures. It could make you look like very intense and arrogant person. You are very devoted to what you believe in. You are very protective of your roots. 

Saturn - your remember responsibility. You always felt there were a lot of expectations towards you. You felt you to had to live up to them. You were scared of disappointing those who put this expectations on you. You decided to hide this fear and your inner child deep down in yourself.  Family praised you for being more mature than your friends. For being calm and collected. You were carrying the burden of responsibilites on your shoulders and it felt so heavy you wanted to cry but you couldn’t. You couldn’t show any kind of weakness, any feelings. You felt you weren’t allowed to do that. You felt this is how adulthood looks like and how you have to live. You felt very old as a child. You felt all of your supposed to be “good years” are behind you and what waits for you is just more commitments and pain. You were growing up silencing the inner child within. You wanted to become cold. You wanted to kill your feelings. You couldn’t. You just became more effective in hiding them. 

Uranus - you remember rejection. And a change in your relationship with family. In some way you were distanced from them. You couldn’t fit in. You were different in some way and you always felt they treat you differently.You became more emotionally detached to protect yourself from hurt. To protect yourself from this rejection you didn’t quite understand. You were different, “special” but not in the way you wanted to be. Not in the way to be accepted by your family. Your uniqness felt like a burden. You never showed them how much they hurt you. All of this made you keep your distance from others. Not get too involved with people. You didn’t want to face that kind of rejection twice. You prefered to stay as an outsider in every group you were in. It made you feel safe. 

Neptune - you remember confusion. There were a lot of things that were unspoken. Your family tried to sweep under the carpet more serious issues. You didn’t feel this was right. You wanted this issues to be adressed. They didn’t do that. They never explained. They forced you to just accept things how they are. You had to be a part of game but you didn’t know the rules. And you accepted it. You lost your identity at home. You felt you were drowning. You started to idolize your home environment. You stopped seeing your family for who they were. You became easily influenced by them. You retreated to your inner world where you felt the safest. Your were sensitive. You had great imagination and you used this to survive harder times.

Pluto -  your remember danger. There were a lot of power struggles at home. You wanted to run away from your family because you felt trapped. You were suffocating. You wanted some changes. You wanted transformation of old family patters. You wanted to talk about taboo topics. You were tired of secrets. Everything was so intense. Things felt dangerous and you were forced to survive them. Your family life felt like survival. You had a lot of buried anger and hatred inside of you because you felt so powerless. You felt your family hides something from you. You had to reclaim your own power that you felt was taken away from you. You had to rethink the meaning of family and your own position in there. You put yourself through long tranformation to the core of your being. You became resentful towards authorities. You desire the truth, power and reject sugarcoating more than anything else.