uncle chester

You See My Noble Ancestry? This Photo Of My Great Uncle Chester…
The Man Riding Him? I Am Sure You All Recogize Him, But I Will Say It Out Of Honor. That Is Julius Ceseor. He Is Smiling Because Uncle Chester Just Help Him Conquer Gaul

my favorite things about leonard pine
  • is so petty™ that he wouldn’t let trudy’s ashes into his house  
  • despite that, ran after trudy’s ashes when ivan stole them and got them back for hap
  • saved hap’s pretty face from getting smashed by a hammer (we are all in debt)
  • instantly knew those fake hippies were up to no good
  • played his pro-american records to piss off the fake hippies
  • fuckin dared the fake hippies to shoot him
  • “y’all already made one mistake: PISSIN ME OFF”
  • literally does not take a single bit of shit from anybody at anytime anywhere
  • peed on milton’s head
  • acts like he doesn’t like anybody but also became a dad??? just like that??? and literally burned down milton’s house for what he did to his new son
  • is unapologetic about his sexuality
  • wore the flyest suit to uncle chester’s funeral

When I argue with a sexist, there’s an inevitable point at which he will call me “sweetheart”. (I like to think of it as shorthand for “you’re winning”.) If I’m really making him feel foolish, he may resort to “bitch”. “Ugly” is the last refuge of the hopelessly destroyed.

I’ve been writing about feminism on the internet long enough that these names don’t really bother me. But nothing is more grating than when a man I don’t know - in comments, Twitter or real life - calls me “Jessie”.

It may seem odd that I’d prefer a curse to a cutesy nickname. Like most things men call women when they want to diminish them, “Jessie” is meant to remind me that no matter what I accomplish – the number of books written, articles published, speeches given – I’m still “just a girl”. But it’s the overly-familiar infantilization that really makes my skin crawl. Very creepy Uncle Chester.

—  From my latest at the Guardian - on misogynists who use nicknames

The Awakening, my new Klaine AU, will begin on Saturday July 26th (finally!).

Here’s a little preview from the first chapter! Thanks to Brandi for the fantastic cover art!

“God, I can’t believe you’re finally getting married. It’s going to be the wedding of the century,” Rachel clapped her hands together. “I should probably start organizing your bachelor’s party…”

“Please, whatever you do, don’t hire any strippers,” Kurt begged immediately. “They’re so tacky. Let’s just have one of our classic sleepovers and eat cupcakes. I’ll give you and the girls a make-over.”

“Mm, we’ll see…” Rachel whispered mischievously.

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Anything Goes Roxlin/Hartwin AU

I really like musicals okay

Merlin is desperately in love with Roxanne Morton, a London debutante whom he met at a party. So naturally, he’s dismayed when he discovers that she’s engaged to a wealthy English Lord named Harry Hart. Not giving up, he pursues Miss Morton to the SS Kingsman, a luxury cruise liner. Along with him is his close friend and nightclub singer Gary “Eggsy” Unwin, who decides to help Merlin win the lady’s heart. Also on the ship is infamous gangster Richmond Valentine and his accomplice, Gazelle; both are on the run from the police, but once they catch wind of Merlin’s romantic quest, they also decide to help him out- Valentine, ironically, is a romantic himself.

Only, when they catch up to Roxy, she reveals that she is also in love with Merlin, and has been unable to stop thinking about him since the night they met. But she must marry Lord Hart, for reasons she doesn’t share. Merlin is distraught, but Eggsy comes up with the idea to ‘break up’ the marriage, by having Lord Hart caught in a very compromising position- like in bed with a half-naked young man, for example. This is partly to help Merlin, of course, but Eggsy can’t deny that the Lord is well fit for a noble, older bloke. And to his surprise, Harry has also had his eye on Eggsy, so the seduction is fairly easy.

Harry reveals to Eggsy that he doesn’t want to marry Roxy either, but his overbearing uncle, Chester (also on board the ship), is giving him no choice on the matter, though he refuses to tell Harry exactly why he must marry her. Eggsy relays this to Merlin and the others, and they all resolve to figure out the mystery.

Unfortunately, Valentine and Gazelle are found out, and they are thrown in the ship’s brig. Merlin and Eggsy and thrown in as well, since they were accomplices. Roxy gives a letter to Merlin in the brig before the ship lands. Upon reading the letter, Merlin discovers that Roxy’s family’s business is near bankrupt, and the marriage is actually a business merger with the Harts. But Gazelle points out that a businessman on the boat earlier had said that the Morton business was worth millions. They conclude that Harry’s uncle is manipulating them into marrying to get to the Mortons and their business. It’s then decided; they have to stop the wedding.

The four of them aren’t let out until the ship arrives in port, but they manage to escape before the police arrive to take them. They crash the wedding and reveal the plot, and Roxy and Harry are more than happy to call the whole thing off. Happy ending where Merlin and Roxy are finally together, and so are Harry and Eggsy, and Gazelle and Valentine are able to evade the police thanks to their friends, free to roam another day.

TippiTV #Supernatural recap: 11-07 “Plush”

Previously on Supernatural

We met Sheriff Donna Hanscum and her dick ex-husband Doug. Donna beheaded a vampire and made friends with Jody Mills, then ran off together to start an all-woman hunters club in my mind.

Also, Sam Winchester was more scared of clowns than he was just about any other monster he’s ever come across, and that is 100% logical and fine to me because clowns are the worst as all evidence will bear out.

Currently on Supernatural

We start with married couple in suburbia. The obnoxious husband, Stan, complains about his wife’s cooking and then tells her to bring him a beer. Some guy in an oversized rabbit mask shows up and stabs him to death with a beer bottle. The wife screams.

Meanwhile at the bunker, Sam is praying to God.

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I WANT TO PLAY THE YOUTUBE FAMILY GAME WITH ALL OF YOU...

Here are the rules

  1. You can either reblog with your list, message me your list, or make your list on your own blog.
  2. If you make your list on your blog please tag it with #youtubefamilygame so it’s easy for me to find.
  3. IT HAS TO BE A YOUTUBER! (any youtuber, big or small) 
  4. The pet has to be a youtuber's pet.
  5. You can only have 1 significant other and 1 set of parents.
  6. You can have up to 4 children, 4 siblings, and 4 cousins.
  7. You can have up to 2 Aunts, 2 Uncles, and 2 pets.
  8. You DO NOT have to do every single category.

Then when I decide to stop this (which I will let you all know when that is) I’ll tally up all the answers and see who is the ULTIMATE YOUTUBE FAMILY!Sound good? I’ll start it off…  

Significant Other: Chris Riedell

Child 1: Troye Sivan

Child 2: Ashley Mardell

Parents: Louise Pentland & Louis Cole

Sibling 1: Joselyn Hughes

Sibling 2: Mitchell Davis

Sibling 3: Tim Helbig

Aunt & Uncle 1: Mamrie Hart & Flula Borg

Cousin 1: Hannah Hart

Cousin 2: Tyler Oakley

Aunt & Uncle 2: Grace Helbig & Chester See

Cousin 3: Lyle Friedman

Cousin 4: Ashley Skidmore

Pet: Beanz

& guys please remember: THIS IS ALL FOR FUN! No shipping wars or anything like that. This is just a fun game for everyone to play. :)