This man here is my first love in the world of fiction. I’ve had crushes before him, but damn, he’s the first fictional dude to ever get me so obsessed. I still love him though, but I’m all for Akashi now. Why am I even talking like we have a past?
“And just who are you?” I’m your ex.
Hi Sasori. I can be your puppet. You can examine me anytime. Kidding. Sigh.
How would you rewrite the Fifty Shades of Gray to fix it?
Aside from fixing up the general awkwardness of the writing, there are a few ways in which one could take the basic concept of Fifty Shades of Grey and “fix” it.
Assuming we were trying to stay as close to the source material as possible, all we would need to change would be the tone. Instead of being viewed as a tortured but ultimately innocent hottie who’s a victim of circumstance, Christian Grey would be acknowledged as what he is in the end–an abuser. Anastasia, still new to relationships and far less worldly than Christian, could still be easily taken in by him and, overwhelmed by the attention she’s receiving from such an attractive, successful, distinguished man, fail to see the signs of the abuse he’s inflicting upon her. He would prey on her naivety openly and by the end Anastasia would have to struggle to break free. Most of the book reads like this, all that would be needed is a commitment to seeing this to its logical conclusion. Either that, or play Anastasia staying with Grey as a tragedy–maybe he uses the fact that they’re expecting a child to force her to stay a la Gone Girl.
If we still want Christian to be seen in a positive light, a lot more of his behavior needs to be called out and he needs to make a much more active commitment to change. He plays lip service to it in the books, but his behavior and actions are never all that different for very long and ultimately Anastasia still gives in to whatever he wants in the hopes that it’ll make her “worthy” of him (see: her constantly angsting over how he NEEDS BDSM and she can’t give him that kind of relationship… only to ultimately give him that kind of relationship). That’s another thing–Christian’s enjoyment of BDSM should NOT be connected to his trauma and anger issues. Their BDSM activities should be something that they mutually enjoy, or at least something that brings him happiness, not a reaction he has to being angry. When someone hits you because they are mad at you, it’s abuse and assault, plain and simple. Especially when the person being hit doesn’t really want to be hit.
I personally like either option. I’ve always been intrigued by the psychology of abusive relationships and honestly Fifty Shades of Grey nails the kind of mental conditioning that victims go through, so it’d be truest to the original. However, I also like Beauty and the Beast type stories where a couple is able to grow together and overcome such obstacles, ultimately enriching each others’ lives in a meaningful and observable way.
Now, for a complete overhaul of how I’d handle the base plot if I was given this as a first draft and told “do whatever you want, just fix it!”
just imagine lovino getting a lil rounder here and there bc eating helps him deal with stress (and hes super stressed 24/7 sO) and he rly hates his chub esp bc antonio is so RIPPED LIKE ULTIMATE HOTTIE and hes so scared antonio wouldnt find him hot anymore.. but tonio JUST LOVES THIS LITTLE SOFT ANGRY BALL SO MUCH and thinks that lovi’s rounded belly is cute and he loves lying on his chest bc its soft like a pillow…. and just….. cHUBBY LOVINO
The summer before I entered the 10th grade was lit af. I had a very good friend , we were basically attached at the hip . We gonna call her Kayla. So me & Kayla was always together , she introduced me to the hoe life . When I met her I was at 2 bodies & she was already at 6. I used to love listening to her hoe stories . Anyways I had a crush on this guy named Zeke. He was the ultimate hottie. I remember meeting him at school . I was walking in the hallway & we passed each other , I looked back & he looked back smiling . He stopped me & started a convo with me. The basic “what’s ur name? ” type shit. So I give him my number & I go on about my business .
Eventually I invited him to my house . He came in from my sliding glass door because we was on some sneak shit. We cuddled & kissed on some romantic type shit then he left. Maybe a couple months went by , me & Kayla went downtown which was our usual hangout spot. Zeke texted me wanting to know if I wanted to chill . I’m like shit yea like U bae af. I ain’t say that but u know . He picks us up in his lil hooptie , drops Kayla off at her boyfriends house because she had a dick appointment .
I get to Zeke’s house , walk in the door . The living room is packed with niggas. I’m like nah , ain’t no trains happening tonight no sir. Fuck u thought . So I go in the kitchen , he pours me a shot. Take it to the head . He’s like telling his boys to make room on the couch for me . I got niggas to the right of me & niggas to the left of me. They passin the blunt around . It gets to me . Look , I didn’t know bout the puff puff pass back then , so it came to me … I’m puffin & puffin & puffin . His nigga like “ slow down , u bouta be high af”. So i pass it. My poor lil baby lungs. I’m coughing so hard but still trying to be cute . Ladies u know that cough u do when u around niggas but u still trying to be cute . My ass was dying . I lean forward then lean back . I instantly feel it all.
I get up to go to the bathroom , I’m crawling up the steps like a dumb ass . His friend jokingly says “ yea we laced it with crack ” I’m like “ NOOO not crack my mama was a crackhead ” It was mad dramatic for like 2 seconds . So I get up the stairs go to the bathroom. I’m looking in the mirror like “ bitch u high af”. I open the door & zeke is coming up the stairs. I don’t know why but I take my shirt off & his friends like “whoooooooooo” so he pushes me in his room, locks the door . I’m steady getting naked bc like I planned for this moment since I met his fine ass & I’m dominant af. I’m always making the first move . So I’m naked , I lay on the bed .
I honestly don’t know much of what happened because I was high as all fucks . All I remember is him keep having to ask me to arch my back lol so I’m guessing the sex was trash af because I was like no good while high. I know that when we were done I put my clothes on & went back into the bathroom , he sat on the toilet & was like going through my phone & shit being nosey . He started recording me trying to spit in his sink because I had cotton mouth .
We leave & while we waiting on Kayla to come out I suddenly started crying & telling him my life story lol looking back I feel sorry for him because he was probably confused as fuck . So we riding to my house , I swear this hoe was trying to flirt with him . I’m like I got my eye on u bitch, u just got done getting dick & u want more . So we get to my house , i fake sober up so I won’t get in trouble . Get down to my room & Kayla tells me that she called me while I was fucking zeke & I answered screaming out his name . That’s how high I was. Lol
A couple months later I fucked him in the schools bathroom & it was lit. It was a hoe moment for sure . The whole time I was at that school he was rlly nice to me & was always super cool even after the fuckationship . Me & Kayla not friends nomore & Zeke dating some white bitch now . The end .