ugh i need to stop crying or so help me

ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʙᴀʙʏ sᴇɴᴛᴇɴᴄᴇ ᴍᴇᴍᴇ!


      PREGNANCY -

❝ We’re going to be parents! ❞
❝ Did you feel him/her/them kick!? ❞
❝ Do you want to feel the baby? ❞
❝ I’m pregnant…and it’s yours. ❞
❝ Do you think I’ll make a good mother/father? ❞
❝ What are you hoping for? ❞
❝ I feel so nauseous today… ❞
❝ What should we name him/her/them? ❞
❝ How many diapers do you think we’ll need? ❞
❝ You’re crying over a puppy? ❞
❝ Is just strawberry okay? They didn’t have strawberries and cream. ❞
❝ I’ve read this book four times I’m basically an expert by now. ❞
❝ Boy or girl? ❞
❝ Wait, do we have everything on this list I found? ❞
❝ Can you put the crib together? I’m so tired. ❞
❝ This kid can come out anytime it’s ready. ❞      
❝ You’re glowing. ❞
❝ How far along are you? ❞
❝ Please don’t freak out…but I’m pregnant. I SAID DON’T FREAK OUT. ❞
❝ Hospital. Now! ❞
❝ I think that was a contraction… ❞
❝ The due date’s not until next week! ❞

     NEW BABY -

❝ S/He’s your kid before five in the morning. ❞
❝ We need to go on a diaper run again. ❞
❝ We’re out of formula–where’s the other can!? ❞
❝ Ugh, s/he spit up on my good shirt! ❞
❝ S/he won’t stop crying, I don’t know what to do. ❞        
❝ Please take him/her, I’m going to go crazy with the screaming. ❞
❝ Is it even possible for a baby to scream so much!? ❞
❝ Should they be breathing like that? ❞
❝ I need to go check on the baby. ❞    
❝ If you never put him/her down you’ll spoil him/her. ❞
❝ Daddy/Mommy’s little girl/boy! ❞
❝ Good morning, little spawn of Satan! ❞
❝ Shhh, they’re finally asleep.  ❞    
❝ Dammit, I just got them to sleep! ❞
❝ Be careful, s/he’s a hair puller…. ❞
❝ Where’s the pacifier!? ❞
❝ I can’t find his/her blanket, please help me. ❞    
❝ I’ve been up since four this morning, it’s your turn. ❞
❝ I found you and the baby sleeping in the recliner at six am and it was so precious. ❞
❝ Stroller, diaper bag, playpen, blanket, bottles, what else do we need before we go to your parents? ❞
❝ A babysitter!? Are you insane!? ❞    
❝ You’re going to spoil them. ❞    
❝ We can’t go out with the baby, that’s just asking for trouble. ❞
❝ Baby’s awake… ❞
❝ S/he’s so precious…. ❞
❝ This is our son/daughter…. ❞
❝ We make damn beautiful babies. ❞
❝ Look at his/her little feet… ❞
❝ S/he has your eyes. ❞
❝ Do not dress him/her in that! ❞    
❝ Be careful with him/her! ❞
❝ Did you remember to pack his/her toy? ❞
❝ His/her first tooth came in today. Already bit me.❞
❝ Did you hear that? That was a cough.❞           

        CHILDREN -

❝ The kids won’t stop fighting. ❞
❝ We should have another. ❞
❝ Stop giving them dessert before dinner! ❞
❝ You’re going to spoil them rotten… ❞
❝ You need to learn not to fall for the puppy dog eyes.  ❞
❝ I just love them so much!? ❞    
❝ How are we going to break the news to them that they’re getting a brother/sister? ❞
❝ Their screaming woke the baby… ❞    
❝ I’m a horrible mother/father… ❞
❝ How can you make the baby hush and I can’t? ❞
❝ Was that a word!? ❞
❝ His/her first word better not be a damn cuss word! ❞    
❝ You look exhausted. ❞
❝ First steps! First steps! ❞
❝ Watch, s/he can roll over now! ❞
❝ I don’t want anyone else watching our baby/children. ❞    
❝ They totally wanted to build the pillow fort, not me. ❞
❝ Can you manage dropping them off? ❞
❝ Damn terrible twos, right? ❞
❝ How did they outgrow their clothes so fast!? ❞   
❝ I think we make damn good parents. ❞
❝ Why are both you and the baby crying? ❞
❝ Here, I’ll watch him/her, you go relax. ❞
❝ I haven’t been able to put her/him down all morning/day/night. ❞    
❝ S/he doesn’t want me, s/he wants you! ❞
❝ S/he just ran into the coffee table, don’t worry. ❞
❝ Stop fighting with me in front of the kid/s! ❞
❝ We shouldn’t have dressed the twins in matching outfits… ❞    
❝ Can I hold him/her? ❞
❝ S/he has separation anxiety because you never put them down! ❞
❝ My mother always hoped my kids would end up like me…I’m so sorry. ❞
❝ I wouldn’t let them do ____, so they started crying. ❞  
❝ Oh, s/he’s just a little angel! ❞
❝ Hello, little one! ❞
❝ I can babysit if you’d like. ❞
❝ Guess who broke your favorite ____. ❞  
❝ Finally got him/her/them to sleep. ❞
❝ It’s your turn to put him/her/them to bed. ❞
❝ I hate bath time. ❞
❝ Can you help me with the kids for five goddamn minutes!? ❞
 
❝ I think ____ is jealous of the baby. ❞
❝ ___ just hit ___, can you do something!? ❞
❝ Is locking kids in the basement against the law!? ❞
❝ They’re cute when they’re quiet. ❞
❝ Maybe taking them to the park will let out all their energy. ❞
❝ _____ colored on the walls today… ❞
❝ Look at the mess they made again… ❞      
                     

You’re Hot When You’re Pissed

Pairing: Kai Parker x Reader

Word Count: 963

Description: With one foot in hell and the other in Mystic Falls, Kai struggles to find a way to stay stationary. His luck running thin, Damon calls you in hopes to keep Kai in one place, considering your romantic past with him. Pissed off at Kai’s previous actions, you appear to be no help to Damon until you her Kai’s proposal about Elena. Reluctantly, you help your old friend however, you find yourself unable to resist the temptation that is Kai Parker.

Warnings: Heated make out session and Kai being a prick on the phone 

Request: kai parker imagine (kai and her were together before he got killed) where he comes back from hell and trys to win her back but she’s pissed because she was close to elena. she tells him that the only way she would forgive him is to bring elena back and when he promises her to bring her back they have a hot makeout session (i’d love it if you could write it like in 8x13 where damon and kai are in that dinner but she’s with them, thanks a lot ♡)

A/N: I’m not too sure if this is what you had in mind, but I think I kinda got the idea down. Plus I watched 8x13 and omg that episode had me feeling some type of way hot damn Kai Parker

Originally posted by magnuzbane

You were walking down the sunny streets of Mystic Falls when your phone began to ring. Taking it out of your pocket, Damon’s contact appeared on the screen so you answered it, only expecting him to ask about Bonnie and her well being.

“(Y/N), you have got to help me out here, he won’t leave me alone!”

Damon expressed through the phone, however before you could respond there was a struggle on the other side until a different voice spoke.

“Darling, I missed you so much, ugh in hell it’s terrible! Very lonely down there, I’m deprived from your handy work to put it in PG. The way you touched-”

“Ew, give it back!”

Damon took back the phone and huffed at the restless witch next to him.

“Damon, don’t tell me he’s back.”

“Well then I won‘t tell you but you need to meet me at the diner, please come and help me. He won’t stop crying about how much he misses you.”

You rolled your eyes, annoyed at your friend from helping Kai Parker in surviving his borrowed time.

“(Y/N) please, I really need your help here.”

Damon begged, truly needing your assistance in controlling your old lover.

“Give me five minutes.”

You hung up the phone, angered by the thought that you would have to confront your ex, the man who put on of your best friends in a coma. 

When you entered the diner you found the two vampires in a corner booth, secluded from the rest of the patrons.

“(Y/N), you have no idea how much I-”

“Save your speech Kai, I don’t care.”

You bluntly stated, sliding into the seat next to Damon. The waitress came over and asked if you wanted anything, only shaking your head no as a response.

“So, the thing is that I kinda made a deal with your boyfriend over here to give you two some alone time in exchange for some Bonnie help. Sorry.”

Damon sped out of the booth and presumably out of the diner. You scoffed and rolled your eyes, then making eye contact with Kai.

He smirked and waved at you, while you began to get up.

“You don’t want to help out your dear friend Bonnie with her new found power? That’s not being a very good friend.”

Kai sang, knowing that you couldn’t put yourself ahead of Bonnie, especially at after Enzo.

You sat back down and crossed your arms, just staring at Kai and not giving into any invitation for conversation. Kai however was not phased by this and just began to play with a napkin in his hands. He then put the napkin completely in his hand and put it his hand facing down on the table in front of you. 

“I always thought our love was delicate like a flower. Because of my past and who I am I always believed that I could shatter it in an instant.”

Intrigued, you uncrossed your arms and put them in your lap. Kai’s words had you captivated but you wouldn’t let him know that.

“But although it was fragile from my own doing, it was beautiful. In fact, it was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever known. What I did killed that flower but who says we can’t plant a new one?”

Kai dropped the napkin on the table, however it wasn’t crumpled up like you had expected it to be. The napkin was now hovering over the table, just high enough for it to cast a small shadow. 

This gesture would normally make you melt, but to prove a point, you just turned your head to the side, avoiding his hopeful gaze.

“What can I do to persuade you to give me another shot? I don’t have much time left, not unless I can find a way to stay, but whatever time I do have I want to spend it with you. Please, tell me what I can do.”

You continued to ignore his pleas and left the table becoming annoyed. Kai followed you out the side exit of the diner and ran around you, stopping you from leaving the alley.

“Just tell me! Damn it (Y/N), please!”

He yelled, becoming frustrated with your actions. All he wanted was you, your lips on his, your skin exposed to his touched. He wanted you, but he couldn’t make that any more clear.

“You know what I want? I want my best friend back! Kai, that’s what I want, can you do that? Can you bring back Elena?”

You screamed back at him, anger exploding out of your voice. 

“Of course I can! Are you stupid, I would do anything!”

Kai yelled back, as he stepped closer to you, tears in his eyes.

“Then would you just shut up and kiss me already?”

He wasted no time raising his hands and cupping your face, smashing his lips against yours. He ran his tongue on the bottom of your lip and you opened your mouth, your tongue meeting his.

Kai moved you to against the wall and his hands fell to your waist, running up you shirt, as you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, never breaking the passionate kiss.

“I leave you two for barely twenty minutes and your tongues are already down each other’s throats. Don’t have sex in an alleyway in unsanitary.”

Damon stated, startling you both, jolting you two apart. He walked away, back to his classic car, while Kai turned back around and started to kiss you neck. You laughed and ran your fingers through his hair.

“Kai he just gave us a warning, if we’re continuing this shin dig we should go back to my place.”

He groaned and continued to kiss you neck.

“You’re just so hot when you’re pissed.”

anonymous asked:

Pale or flush Gamkar?

i beG YOUR PARDON BUT WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE TALKING TO

YOU COME INTO MY HOUSE

YOU MENTION FLUSH GAMKAR TO ME ON THIS, THE DAY OF MY PALE OTP’S WEDDING.

PALE, ANON, PALEST OF THE MOST PALE GODDAMN PALE PAIRINGS THAT EVER SHOOSHED INDISCREETLY AND MADE EVERYBODY UNCOMFORTABLE PALE LIKE DIAMONDS AND STARS AND SAND AND VERY FREAKING PALE THINGS  OR METAPHORICAL BONES THAT HAVE BEEN BAKED SO LONG IN THE METAPHORICAL SUN OF VERY REAL EMOTIONAL AND ROMANTIC TURMOIL AND MUTUAL BALANCE AND NEED THAT THEY’VE BASICALLY TURNED EVEN PALER THAN REGULAR BONES THAT WERE ALREADY SUPER PALE 

DO Y OU EVERN UNDERSTAND OH MY GOD TAKE AWAY All those other quadrants

just go

leave mehere to write face-touches and tiny kisses and screaming matches that end in hugs and cuddling and talking about feelings even when it hurts so bad both of you are crying and a mutant pariah and a touch-starved orphan not knowing how to touch each other and the constant need for reassurance and mutual affection and balance and calming and the reminder tha a voice in yoru head isn’t a reason to do something and hair-petting and height difference and egregiously intimate and romantic nonsexual EVERYTHING die

2

“Lyanna might have carried a sword, if my lord father had allowed it. You remind me of her sometimes. You even look like her.”
“Lyanna was beautiful,” Arya said, startled. Everybody said so. It was not a thing that was ever said of Arya.
“She was,” Eddard Stark agreed, “beautiful, and willful, and dead before her time.”