A Harry Potter who gets addicted to dreamless sleep potion
A Harry Potter who sometimes can’t get out of bed in the morning, who doesn’t see the point in his life anymore because ever since he was 11 he only ever saw Voldemort as his future
A Harry Potter who looks at the faces of other mourners and blames himself for not getting it done quicker
A Harry Potter who for once gets looked after by his friends who comfort him when he goes through withdrawal symptoms, who comforts him when he has the worst nightmares he’s ever had, who pause everything to look after each other
A Harry Potter who still has a bag packed and is ready to run because he’s sure this isn’t the end, because he’s sure that Voldemort will come back and ruin everything again
A Harry Potter who can’t sleep without the sound of Ron’s snoring or Hermione’s breathing
A golden trio who sleep in Mrs Weasleys front room for months after everything because they feel unsafe without the others there
A Harry Potter who finds it incredibly hard to deal with the war and its only his family that can help him, even if it is just to hold him whilst he cries
A Harry Potter who is broken and scared and doesn’t understand the future but for the first time in his life is surrounded by people that will help him
A large estate, with red and white roses blooming in the front garden. It’s a large house, but some how it’s modest. It’s homey. The chimney expels white smoke into the crisp morning air.
Lily Potter stands in the kitchen drinking a cup of tea. Her stomach is almost about to pop, the new baby close to coming into the world. James wonders down the stairs, blurry eyed as he sits on on the kitchen bench, kissing his wife on the forehead.
“Its Potter now, James.” This was how they greeted each other every morning.
“Padfoot owled me last night, I forgot to mention. He wants to come over for breakfast? We can invite Moony and Worms as well?” James asked.
“I assume they’ll be over in ten minutes, no matter what I say.” Lily smiled. “ Quickly floo them and tell them it’s a PJ morning. No proper clothes.”
James grinned and went to the fire place.
It was a wonderful morning.
Harry can see it so perfectly in his mind. His mother, no makeup and hair up in a bun from sleeping. His dad the same, his hair somehow defying the laws of physics.
He can smell the pancakes cooking, Remus laughing with Lily as she flipped them. James, Sirius and Peter having an in depth conversation about the recent Qudditch match. He can smell morning breath and flowers and the smell of morning air.
He can see it as he stands in the ruins of the Potter estate, the one his family lived in for generations.
The next day, Draco went to work as normal. Merlin knew he couldn’t stay at the manor with his mother fussing over him all day. It was all in vain, however; Blaise was on him the second he walked into his shop. Blaise always had the ability to see when something was wrong.
“What did Potter do this time?” he asked.Draco shook his head. Blaise stared at him with narrowed eyes and then said, “Okay.” Then, he went to walk out of the shop.
“What are you doing?” Draco asked.
“To find Potter so I can punch him in the nose,” Blaise said matter-of-factly. Draco reached his hand out to grab his arm and pull him back.
“Blaise, you can’t just punch people in the face to solve every problem,” Draco admonished. Blaise stopped fighting Draco’s grasp and gave him a hard stare.
“You were so excited yesterday for your anniversary. It was the first time I’ve seen you truly happy in a long time, Draco. I know how hard it is for you - being in a relationship with someone who works so much. Yesterday, I thought maybe things would turn around for you. Apparently, the opposite has happened,” Blaise explained.
Draco stared at his feet and replied, “I shouldn’t have gotten my hopes up. You’re right, it’s been bad for a long time now.” With that, he turned to make his way behind the register. The shop was opening soon.
Blaise’s eyes were on him, but he ignored him by re-stacking the cups on the counter. When he was finished, he could still feel Blaise’s stare on him. He un-stacked and re-stacked the cups again. After doing this three more times, he chanced a peek up. Blaise was no longer staring at him, but outside instead.
“Er-” he started, but before he could finish, the door to the shop burst open. Harry stood there in the doorway. Draco sighed as Harry looked at him with an intense look in his eyes.
“Can we talk?” he asked. Despite knowing that he should say no, Draco found himself nodding in agreement. He walked out from behind the counter and into his office, silently urging Harry to follow. When Harry entered the tiny space, Draco closed the door and casted a silencing charm.
“I’m working,” Draco grumbled. “What do you want?”
“You,” Harry professed. Draco had vowed to keep a strong resolve, but Harry was making it a challenge with his seemingly honest words and fierce stare. Those green eyes seemed to tell Draco everything he wanted to hear. But it was just fantasy. When you want something desperately enough, you see it everywhere, but it’s not there. It was a mirage in a desert.
With that thought in mind, Draco took a sharp inhale and said, “I can’t do this, Harry.” His voice cracked at the end, but he took a few calming breaths. Now wasn’t the time to break down. He needed to be resolute.
“I’m sorry. About everything. I’ve been a terrible boyfriend to you, I know. You did not deserve to be treated that way. I’ve been working to much and that’snot fair to you,” Harry admitted. As he was talking, he took a few steps forward so him and Draco were less than a foot away from each other. Draco was determinedly looking away at the wall. If he looked at Harry, he knew he would break.
“I don’t know if an apology would do much good, right now,” Draco divulged. Harry nodded.
When Draco didn’t say anything else, Harry continued, “I know this can’t fix everything. From now on, I’ll spend every day trying to fix this. For now, however, you should know that I quit my job,” Harry confessed. Finally, Draco looked up and stared at Harry with wide eyes.
“You… what?” he asked incredulously. A look of hope came over Harry’s face.
“After last night, I thought I’d go to work to get it out of my head. When I got there, I realized I didn’t want to get it out of my head. I wanted to make it better. You are more important than any job I could ever have,” Harry confessed. He brought his hand up to slide Draco’s hair behind his ear. “I love you.” Draco stared at him for a moment.
“You- I can’t believe you did that,” Draco whispered. His resolve was slipping away, but he knew he couldn’t let Harry get away with everything so easily. “You put another relationship before ours,” he protested, halfheartedly pushing Harry away.
“I know; I’m so sorry,” Harry said in a pained voice.
“You forgot our anniversary,” Draco said with a broken voice. Harry’s face fell as he took in Draco’s pained expression.
“Yeah, I did. That was unforgivable. There’s nothing I can say to explain that. All I can say is that I won’t do it again. And I promise I’ll never forget our wedding anniversary,” Harry murmured. At Draco’s confused expression, Harry got down on one knee. He reached into his jacket coat to bring out a small box. When he opened it, a sleek gold band was revealed.
“Wha-” Draco started but stopped at Harry’s passionate stare.
“I know that I’ve messed up more times than I can count, but I want the opportunity to make it up to you every day for the rest of my life. Draco Lucius Malfoy, will you marry me?”