ugh dumbs

Your secret is safe with me

“Blaise,” Draco fumed, storming into the living room, “what happened to the chest of drawers in my room?”

Blaise looked up from the paper he was reading and grinned at Draco.

“Do you like the new one? You’ve been whining about it so much, I thought I’d just replace that awful old-timer.”

“What did you do with that old-timer?”

“I sold it,” Blaise shrugged.

“You sold it,” Draco repeated flatly.


“Who did you sell it to?” Draco asked frantically.

“No idea,” Blaise said. “I didn’t get a name. Two people came by to pick it up. I think they were Muggles.”

Draco felt like he was about to faint.

“Did you take everything out beforehand?”

Blaise snorted.

“Of course! What do you take me for?”

“Everything?” Draco insisted.

Blaise raised an eyebrow at Draco’s tone and studied him.

“Yes, everything.”

Draco took a step closer and narrowed his eyes.

“Even what was under the secret false bottom in the second drawer, nobody but me knows about?”

Blaise paled and his mouth opened.

“Oh,” he simply said.

“Yes, oh,” Draco growled. “Great, now I have to hunt it down. You’re a lousy flatmate.”

“Hey, I just wanted to do you a favour,” Blaise said defensively.

“You better hope they haven’t found what’s inside it, or I’m going to kill you.”

Doing the locator spell was easy enough. Draco had feared it wouldn’t work, but it seemed there were no wards guarding the flat the chest of drawers had ended up in. Draco apparated to the flat, his heart hammering as he knocked.

When the door opened, Draco was sure he had to be dreaming. Of all the people in the world. Of course. Of course.

“Malfoy?” Potter seemed stunned. He was holding a toothbrush and was only dressed in a green t-shirt and pants. “How did you find me?”

Draco shook his head, willing his mind to work properly again.

“You have something of mine,” he said curtly.

“And what might that be?” Potter responded, a grin beginning to form on his lips. It took Draco off guard for a moment.

“Can I just come in and check something?”

Potter stepped aside and gestured for Draco to come in. Draco wasted no time and quickly found the chest of drawers in the corner of Potter’s bedroom. He opened the second drawer and took out the little book he had been so desperate to get back.

“What’s that?” Potter asked, leaning against the doorframe.

“Nothing of your concern. It shouldn’t have been in there,” Draco huffed.

“Hmmm,” Potter hummed. “You know, I never would have thought you kept a diary.”

Draco blushed, quickly hiding his hands behind his back.

“It’s not a diary,” he said lamely.

Potter nodded, but he had a mischievous smile on his face.

“You want a drink?” he asked, turning around and heading back into the living room. Draco blinked and tried to find his voice again.

“Um, no thank you. You were obviously getting ready for bed. I won’t disturb you any longer,” he said hastily.

“You sure? It might be a great opportunity,” Potter grinned. Draco gave him a quizzical look.


“I don’t know,” Potter shrugged, “after two Firewhiskeys you might get the chance to run your hands through my incredibly infuriating, magnificent head of hair.” Potter tried to keep a straight face, but couldn’t suppress a snicker. “I might even let you touch my strong and marvellous jawline.”

Never had Draco wished more the ground would open and swallow him up.

“You read it,” he said through gritted teeth. “You had no right.”

“True,” Potter replied, nonchalant. “I’d let you read mine in return, but I don’t keep a diary.” He stepped closer to Draco, studying his face intently.

“You look rather cute when you’re flushed.”

Draco made a sound that was something between a weird gurgle and a high-pitched squeak. Whatever it was, it was highly embarrassing.

Potter chuckled, coming to a halt right in front of Draco.

“I mean, I could just show you what kind of fantasies I’d be writing in that diary,” he said in a low whisper.

Draco gulped, not quite grasping what Potter was saying.

“Like what?” he breathed.

“Hmmm.” Potter’s eyes flickered down to Draco’s lips. “Like how I want to grab you right now and kiss you until you can’t breathe.”

Draco’s mouth opened involuntarily. Breathing was already hard with Potter standing so close to him.

“And then,” Potter continued, deliberately breathing on Draco’s lips, “I’d want your hands on the most delicious and perfect arse you have ever seen in your life.”

Draco groaned loudly. This was just too much. But then again, Potter really seemed to be teasing him in a rather flirtatious way. Trying to conceal his nervousness, he raised his chin and fixed Potter with a glare.

“These better not just be empty promises,” Draco said haughtily.

“Oh, they’re not,” Potter smirked, his eyes gleaming as he started pouring their drinks.

Your Worst Nightmare

Summary: Dan can’t sleep–he never can. And it’s thanks to the demon under his bed.

TW: uhhh scary demon shit. idk when @mangothatismelancholy was reading it she was legitimately scared so idkkk

Genre: angst

Word Count: 5k

(here’s a drawing @societyshottheunicorns01​ made!)

(and a drawing @haleykinz​ made!)

Keep reading

Heh ya know

I have seen a few fics about either Lance or Keith having a diary and it always makes me giggle because ‘psh as if the other one is finding that shit, there’s is only one person in the entire team who is able to find that kind of stuff.’


Just, picture it, because I think it’s adorable. Let’s pretend both Lance and Keith have diaries (jorunals thx v much) and they gush about the other there, because it helps.

Can you imagine the conversations tho? 

Keith: ugh, Lance is dumb to think anyone would fall for that pick up line.

Hunk: That’s not what you said in –

Keith: huNK!!


Lance: ugh, Keith is so insufferable, when is that mullet going to dissapear anyways –? 

Hunk: July 21th at 23:45 pm, you wrote about it being, and I quote ‘a black mane with stars stuck on it.’

Lance: I hate you, how dare you, I put a password on it

Hunk: bondingmoment is not a strong password

Pidge: told you

Keith poping his head from the door: I heard bonding moment. 


Lance: Hunk, buddy, you gotta stop reading pivate stuff, man, it’s not ethic and fair and –

Hunk: Keith wrote that your eyes are pretty

Lance: carry on


*Keith and Hunk meeting in a dark corner of the castle*

Keith: do you got the stuff?

Hunk: he wrote that his dream date is next to the beach

Keith: your service is appreciated


Lance: Is it too much to ask to just have that one person who is smitten with you and so in love and that would do anything just to make you smile? I just want someone to loooooOOOOOOOooooooove me, ugh.


Keith: *tackles hunk*


Shiro: Hunk, you need to stop readin your team’s diaries –

Hunk: Keith stole your eyeliner to write Lance a poem in the training room’s wall

Shiro: keITH! 

Fan Bing Bing absolutely killing it and looking like an immaculate goddess at the Met Gala, meanwhile nearly everyone else entirely missed the theme memo.


Steve: And since Ms.May works as much as she does, we pretty much take Peter full time. After school, and most nights. He even has his own room in the tower.

SO I was actually in the middle of packing (frantically) and writing many, many goodbye letters (also frantically) when I finally decided to stop, take a break, and…. messily doodle out this header. And now that I have a header, I can’t just not have a post… yeah?

Obviously, while I’ve only been writing for almost, almost two years now (holy shit, I know), I’ve been reading fanfiction for a lot longer. And I’ve been loving it. So, as a long time reader and appreciator of all of the amazing works the community has so generously shared with the public, I’ve decided to create a quick blog rec post to honor all the wonderful blogs that I have come across. Some I follow, some I don’t, some follow me, some don’t… and that’s fine, and frankly, should not matter at all.

In fact, the only thing that should matter (in regards to this post) is that they are all fanfiction writers and thus deserve all the appreciation and recognition for their hard work and tireless efforts on this special day.

Okay, okay, enough talking. Here we go– (please prepare yourself for the monstrosity that will ensue):

listed in no particular order; italicized blogs either cannot be located/have stopped writing.

@exo-nerates / @taesthetes / @zephyoongist / @tayegi / @duizhangdeluxe / @keypea / @min-tokkiwriter / @bubbleteascenarios / @kainks / @yuudetama / @gukvory / @serendipitae / @chan-chanyeol / @mrsmon / @syubits / @freelancebat / @thesammtimes / @palpitate-hyperventilate / @an-exotic-writer / @xiuminipple / @writingseoul / @kimseokjinsprincess / @baebsaes / @seoulscapes / @remembeo / @9901010101 / @byulwriter / @yoonminnings / @inktae / @dodexogen / @rabbitwrite / @writewhatyoulove / @kareverie / @thereaderwriter / @theboyswhomwelove / @smokaible / @minearebigger / @btsugaplums / @mint-yooxgi / @eat-a-mint-jungkook / @lovelylittlemaknae / @hitchhikingbabeh / @modestlydreaming / @jjangpanda / @inspiritdawn / @jiminerie / @heungtanbts / @suegakookie / @monbell / @jespere-hope / @taehyungie / @wheeinah / @hobibliophile / @rainwards / @dabguk / @13x06x2013 / @exoticarmy127 / @exobaozi-xoxo / @misstae / @sxciopathic-tendencies / @shineeing-star / @jungblue / @helloblamebts / @uyuagashi-fics / @sehvnter / @winnie-writes-kpop / @triptaech / @asexpectedofthestork / @smuttyfairy / @cosykims / @gukblush / @annyeongs / @jungkxook / @the95liner / @versigny / @jiminables / @kimvtae / @starry-sehun / @minsvga / @bapsae-bae / @jjungkooked / @xingtokki / @jheartseok / @funtaesy / @monbell / @9395x / @lthyl / @btsfix / @very-important-army / @flyfireflyfly and, of course, all the writers in the @btswriters network :)

Clearly, I’m missing a lot of people (considering I’ve had a tumblr for a few years now and have used it to read fics rather consistently), and an alarming number of blogs I used to stalk all the time are gone. And, I know, just barfing up a block of text (well, writers) probably isn’t the most sentimental move and people tend to just glance over the whole thing (which is a shame, because there are a lot of talented writers in here). I really regret not knowing about this day earlier, or else this would’ve come out a lot better but… well, better than nothing right?

That being said, I’d really like to take the time to thank all of these writers for dedicating so much of their time towards producing such great works and sharing it with me… some of you guys mentioned have also become my friends who I love and appreciate.

And finally, for all the the writers out there, both of whom I already know and have yet to discover…

(yes, it’s supposed to be fanfic writer’s appreciation day, but I’d like to think that they are one and the same)