u.h.p

Mood:💜❣💜🍇🍆🍷🌌🎉🎵🎶🔮✳🔯🔮❣💜🔮🎵🎶🍆🔯💜🍆🌌🔮🎉🎵🍷💜🔮💜🔯♋🔮♑♊🎵♎🎉🎶🎉✳💜🍆🌌🍇🎉💜🌌🔮🎶♋🔮♑♊♌✳🎶🍇🎵🍇🎉✳♋✳🌌🔮♑🍇♑💜❣🍆💜✳♑🌌♐🎉🎶♋♎♋✳♌🔮💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜🔮🎉🔮🎉🎉🍇🍇🎉

send me a word! || learn all about my muse's physical features!
  • [hair]: length, colour, texture, whether it grows quickly or slowly, how manageable it is, whether it requires lots of styling, do they leave stray hairs everywhere, is it present on their face, is it present on the rest of their body, etc.
  • [eyes]: not just the colour, but the shape, the length of their eyelashes, whether they're alert or usually half-closed, large or small, sunken into the face, ringed by bags, etc.
  • [mouth]: are their lips always drawn thin or are they plump and kissable, what's their "default expression"/resting face, do they have all their own teeth, do they use their teeth to smile, etc.
  • [face]: what is the shape of their face, do they have pronounced cheekbones or a strong jaw, what's the size and shape of their nose, what's the size and shape of their ears, do they stick out, are they pointed, etc.
  • [skin]: obviously colour, but also if they're inclined to run hot or cold, do they have any blemishes or unusual markings, are they inclined to blush, are they freckled, do they tan, what does their skin feel like, etc.
  • [build]: are they skinny and petite or do they resemble a body builder, are they tall or short or average height, are they lean and wiry, are they overweight, are all of their features proportionate, etc.
  • [chest]: (potentially nsfw) what size are their breasts if they have them, nipple colour and shape and size, do they have visible muscle definition/abs, etc.
  • [groin]: (potentially nsfw) any information pertaining to genitals - length, girth, shape, colour, "unusual features", also includes the rear and its general appearance, etc.
  • [hands]: are they large or small, do they have pianist's fingers or short stubby ones, do they tend to get sweaty or are they always dry, is the skin rough or delicate, are the nails painted or chewed or sharp, etc.
  • [legs]: are they solidly built, short and stubby, or long and graceful, do they have knobbly knees or rounded knees, what's their gait, etc.
  • [feet]: do they have a habit of going up on their tiptoes, what's their usualy stance, do they tend to shift their weight to a preferred side, etc.
  • [other]: any other obscure feature or tiny detail that the asker is interested in, could include fantastical elements such as a tail, wings, horns, must be stated by asker, etc.
Dinner at jlaws house
  • Jlaw: "and that's when I said 'WHERES THE PIZZA!?!?'"
  • Dinner guests: *forced laughter as they eat their dinner consisting of only bread*
  • Bradley cooper to me: "can I offer you some bread"
  • Me: "oh um....I don't eat bread"
  • Dinner guests: *complete silence*
  • jlaw with mouth full of bread: "wait....what do you mean you don't eat bread™"
  • Me: "oh um well I can't-"
  • Jlaw: *makes wacky faces* "FUCK YOU!! you ASSHOLE!!!" *crying*
  • Me: "uh well...sorry it's just that I-"
  • Jlaw crawling across the table towards me: "YOU WILL EAT THIS BREAD"
  • Me: "please no"
  • Bradley cooper: "please Jen it's fine...."
  • Jlaw: *ugly crying* "SHUT UP!!! S H U T U P"
  • Jlaw: *takes a fist full of bread and shoves it in my mouth*
  • Me: *muffled crying* "please I have celiac disease I can't eat gluten"
  • Jlaw: "DONT GIVE IN TO SOCIETIES LIES!! EAT THIS BREAD"
  • Dinner guests: *still watching in silent horror*
  • Amy schumer: *thin lipped Amy schumer smile*
  • Oscar committee: "holy f uck Jen...."

a thing i’m thinking about today:

harry potter, aged 23, visiting teddy and andromeda for his normal weekly cup of tea and w/e, and andromeda is in the kitchen and teddy’s run upstairs to fetch harry the latest game he’s obsessed with, and harry notices a leatherbound photo album half-sticking out of the bookshelf in the living room that he’s never seen before, and sort of idly takes it down, and it’s full of photos of the malfoys

photos of narcissa: standing stiffly next to andromeda, the two of them not touching, looking very dubious, and teddy’s ruffled head in the bottom left corner of the picture as he tries uselessly to leap up and wave; sitting very still in a high-backed armchair looking quietly pleased and possessive with teddy six months old and asleep in the crook of her arm; frowning intensely as she pushes rune cards towards a blithely chattering 3 year old teddy.

but most of the photos are of draco. draco asleep on the sofa with teddy curled up and asleep on his chest – there are deep grey circles under draco’s eyes and he’s waxy pale with exhaustion even in sleep, and teddy can’t be more than a couple of months old. draco looking horrified and holding a squirming pudgy teddy at arms length as teddy gleefully spits up what looks like some of his first solids on draco’s crisp white shirt. draco reading a copy of the daily prophet with a 2001 date while teddy crawls up over his back and hangs off around draco’s neck and blows spitballs in his ear. draco and teddy posed solemnly in andromeda’s back garden, draco straddling a broom, teddy next to him and almost beside himself with excitement on the toy broom harry got him for his fourth birthday. draco and teddy playing exploding snap. draco walking in a park next to andromeda with a fast asleep four year old teddy scooped up easily in his arms, snoring on his shoulder. draco in dark jeans and a soft, worn thin looking t-shirt laughing up at the camera while teddy advances on him with hands covered in brightly coloured paint.

harry had no idea narcissa and andromeda were in touch, let alone draco. when he hears teddy thundering back downstairs, he quietly closes the book and replaces it in the cupboard. it doesn’t have to mean anything. he testified at both of the malfoys’ trials. he doesn’t care about them anymore. he’s not even angry.

only that monday at the ministry, when he’s heading for auror hq, draco malfoy wanders past in his buttoned up formal robes clasped tight around his neck, frowning and haughty as ever over a file, shooting harry a swift venomous look as is his habit, and harry’s heart suddenly kicks into high gear.

2

Take this voltron au of my favorite show