tyre slide

“I dreamt all night about how to get ahead of the start because I knew that would probably be the only chance I would get. It didn’t work. Kimi had a good start, mine was OK, so I couldn’t really go anywhere. Then, I think in the first stint I was just trying to pace myself, trying to stay within range. At some point I was really uncomfortable with the rear tyres, they were sliding quite a bit. I think when the gap opened again that’s when Kimi pitted. I knew that if I have any chance that might be it until I get the call because Valtteri was on fresh tyres so it’s likely that he will go quicker, so I just tried to push as hard as I can and wait for the call to box. When it came and then when I came out ahead of Kimi even, I was surprised myself. But for sure I take it.”

So Kara has totally just flown here with Cat and perched her tiny ass on that barrel and then she had to slide the tyres over for her since tiny legs.

Also, perfect height for Kara to step between her legs and kiss her. Just sayin.

Don't fuck with an Australian. Mate.

This is your typical a*shole neighbour revenge with a twist.
I have an a*shole neighbour. He is an elderly-ish man - maybe around 60. Still works down in town. Anyway, we share the start of our driveway, except his goes past my house and down the valley a ways, where his house is.
Now we had just got our driveway paved, meaning he had to park up on the road for the two days they were laying the sand and pavers. Its maybe a 25 meter walk down to his house.

Not only did he berate me at long length when our paths met at the letterbox on the first day, but on the second, he outright abused me in front of my student (I tutor drums). I told my young student to go inside, as he was swearing furiously at me for having the nerve to ask him to park out front for two days.

Fast forward to the next week. He decides to park in the middle of where our driveways split up. Meaning I have to park out on the road. Keep in mind this is actually my property, he’s just a prick. That night, instead of abusing him the next time I saw him, I thought of a better revenge.

In the dead of the night, I take a pack of frozen prawns out of my freezer. I sneak down my driveway and kneel down by one of his tyres. I then begin sliding frozen prawns one by one into his hubcap. Pushing them far enough in that they are invisible from the out side. I systematically fill each of his four hubcaps with two kilos of frozen prawns (4.4 pounds).

Now keep in mind this is in the middle of a boiling hot Australian summer. Even by the next morning i could smell the prawns had thawed and were beginning to cook. Over the course of the next week I watched him inspect his car thoroughly, trying to work out where the abhorrent stench was coming from. He looked in his engine, all through his car, in his f*cking exhaust for christs sake.
But never deep within his hubcaps.

They must have festered there for a good month before he finally sold his car. The smell was bloody horrible. Serves him right, the c*nt.

Too Long; Didnt Read > Australians like to throw a shrimp on the barby, amongst other places.

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Tyree Pranks Amalgam!

@condeshading (( Continued from here. ))

And thus, without warning, Tyree tries to squish the banana creampie all up in Amalgam’s face so the aluminum pie pan would get stuck there. At the same time, Tyree slides the strawberry shortcake upside down, above her head. It’s floating for some reason as Tyree has a string attached to his middle finger, which is connected to the gem on the bottom side, loosely strapped in place. He begins to dance triumphantly while taking out a red rubber ball clown nose, and a rainbow colored Afro. Putting them on and honking the ball on his nose.

*HONK!* *HONK!* *HONK!*

“YUCK! YUCK! YUCK! YOU JUST GOT CREAMED! JUST BECAUSE YOU’RE PRETTY, IT DOESN”T MEAN YOU WON’T BE EXEMPT BY MY PRANKS! YUCK YUCK! YUCK!”