tyra banks instagram

5. He Can Spell, But He Can’t Read

Newsflash to Romeo: This witch shtick is pathetic. Even ADAM thinks you’re a joke!

Takes one to know one, I guess.

Adam’s not alone. “No one really likes Romeo,” says Keith. “He’s this satanic, Ouija board, Chucky doll who thinks he’s better than everyone else. I don’t like his energy. He’s a bitch.”

Not that Romeo would be bothered if he heard that straight to his face. He’s too busy reading a guide to witchcraft.

And by “reading,” I mean “looking at the pictures.” He is illiterate after all.

While everyone else is singing “Big Booty” like they’re at summer camp, Romeo is focusing on his arts and crafts:

Beautifully drawn pentagram, Romeo! He will require more supplies to finish those voodoo dolls, though. I’m going to go out on a limb and say that the show declined to provide him with those materials… and that Romeo proceeded to collect the freshly trimmed hair from off the floor after the makeovers so he could make replicas of the contestants anyway.

However, I’m officially calling bullshit on him successfully casting his third consecutive elimination spell. Since he hates everybody, I’m pretty convinced that he’s giving confessionals about casting spells on each competitor and the show is just choosing whichever clip corresponds with whomever is going home. 

In past weeks, we’ve seen Romeo standing next to Chantelle and exchanging chummy glances with her. She is as much his friend as anyone is in that house, so she is hardly the person he would target next. That’s not to say that he’s not pretty awful to Chantelle, too, especially when he attempts to quote Yu Tsai’s critique about her borderline arrogance back to her.

I cannot stress this enough: do not ever quote Yu Tsai unless you are using those words to mock him. Repeating his words as if they are “sage advice” is embarrassing. He’s Confusing, not Confucius, so disregard his feedback. 

Poor Chantelle. Who would have thought she’d go home so early after being found by Tyra  Banks herself on social media [just thought I’d mention that here in case you missed the first 50 references to it]? One moment Chantelle’s confident she’ll be a finalist in the competition, and then, in an Instagram, she’s gone. 

Oh well. Don’t let anyone touch your hair on the way out, girl! And don’t think for even one second that Romeo’s “witchcraft” had anything to do with your departure.

Shut up, Cutrone.

6 Funniest Moments from ANTM Cycle 21 Episode 4