type: harry potter

The Houses as Studyblrs
  • Gryffindor: Hair held up by pencils, laughing with friends in the library, cups of cocoa, the sound of flipping through papers, the smell of old books, falling asleep in class, humming while you work, debates with friends
  • Slytherin: Surrounded by empty coffee cups, three textbooks open at once, working at 2 in the morning, competing with friends for higher grades, studying out of spite, working to prove someone wrong, rolling your eyes at your textbook's stupid jokes, sassing teachers because you're friends
  • Ravenclaw: Messy bullet journals, papers sticking out of binders, impromptu study sessions, binging crash course videos for fun, doodles on the corners of worksheets, never-ending "TBR" piles of books, dog-eared pages, neat buns, dressing up nice to study
  • Hufflepuff: warm drinks in big mugs, studying in morning sunlight, oversized sweaters, classical music, reading by the fire, studying with friends, bringing your textbook to a small coffee shop, studying with a cat by your side, being asked by classmates to tutor them
  • (Disclaimer: This was based off of a tumblr post, but like wow, the backlash, so I rewrote it)
  • Question: There are seven chairs and ten kids. What do you do? The objective is to sit on a chair.
  • Hufflepuff: Just sit on each other's laps!
  • Ravenclaw: Or you could just bring three more in... Kind of an effortless solution.
  • Gryffindor: We could have a musical chairs game and fight for them
  • Slytherin: I really don't care as long as I get to sit
How to Snag Potter

By Draco Malfoy


1. Midnight Rendezvous: Invite him to a duel and then bond over shared rule-breaking. Didn’t work because Weasley insisted on coming along. Reported them to Filch instead. 

2. Midnight Rendezvous, second attempt: Inspire gratitude by helping him deal with illegal dragon. Possible small talk about my name? Caught by McGonagall

3. Show off amazing Quidditch skills and really cool new broom. Nope. Granger said I bought my way onto the team (NOT TRUE) and I’m pretty sure Potter believed it. 

4. Send carefully composed and endearing Valentine (the only good thing Lockhart has ever done). I don’t think he liked it very much, despite the brilliant lyrics I composed. Ended up shifting blame onto the Girl Weasel. Fairly certain he doesn’t suspect.

5. Become gravely injured in order to appeal to his Savior Complex and inspire feelings of protectiveness. DO NOT ATTEMPT AGAIN. Was nearly murdered when I insulted that giant filthy chicken, and yet Potter decided that IT was the victim?! Unacceptable. I will not rest until that beast is put down.

6. A fun prank! He seems to enjoy stuff like this when the Weasley Twins do it, so I’m sure he will laugh. Learn to sew. It turns out that Potter has no sense of humor as well as very poor vision, because he nearly killed me with that damn Patronus Charm. Although I must admit, it is kind of hot that he can already do a Patronus.

7. Support him with Triwizard Tournament badges! Okay, this one was probably my fault. Pansy saw me experimenting with them and I changed the messages at the last minute. Why can’t he just realize that I don’t mean it?

8. Report Potter’s tragic story to the Prophet to increase sympathy and support. Exaggerate if it will get him more attention. I realize now that Potter does not like attention. Also Skeeter made out like Potter is in some sort of love triangle involving Granger, which is not even remotely acceptable. This was a mistake.

9. Show respect for his friends by composing an encouraging song in Weasley’s honor. Apparently making the title sound complimentary isn’t enough to negate other more insulting lyrics. Honestly this was doomed from the start because there is literally nothing good about the Weasel except his best friend.

10. Impress him with your status and power by leading the Inquisitorial Squad. Umbridge is an absolute menace and I am an idiot.

11. Make him jealous: Flirt excessively with Pansy. I don’t think he even noticed.

12. Show him your sensitive side by crying in the girls’ loo. Fuck.

Sorry I haven’t written in a while. 

13. Realize you’ve been a complete arse for your entire life. Regret everything. Do your best to become someone who does the right thing. Don’t identify Potter when asked. Stop cronies from killing him. Apologize sincerely after he gets you off at your trial. Invite him for dinner. 

14. Invite him for drinks. 

15. Buy him a birthday present. 

16. Kiss him. 

17. Go back to his flat. 

18. Refuse to leave his bed. This only works for so long.

19. Attempt to make him breakfast.

20. Come out to the Prophet together.

21. Date for three years.

22. Say “yes.”

  • Hermione [reading aloud]: "If you bite it and you die; it's poisonous. If it bites you and you die; it's venomous"
  • Ron: What if it bites me and it dies?
  • Hermione: That means you’re poisonous.
  • Harry: What if it bites itself and I die?
  • Luna: It's voodoo.
  • Neville: What if it bites me and someone else dies?
  • Hermione: That's correlation.
  • Ron: Not causation.
  • Harry: What if we bite each other and neither of us die?
  • Ginny: That's kinky.
slytherin, a story.

we know.

we know there’s so much deeper to a slytherin than just snarky remarks and a jab of an insult. we know there’s a million more walls to fight through before we reach the core, the shielded fire of a slytherin; their heart, burning in ferocity as they take pride in everything they do.

we know that slytherins hold their head up high, never letting their guard down because they don’t know what they’ll do if someone taunts them, letting them make a fool of themselves.

because slytherins are just as heartless as we are; doing anything for the ones they love. they play within the rules, never bending or breaking them because they promised themselves that they will do what’s right for themselves after being ridiculed, shamed and left hanging.

because being a slytherin means working your ass off to achieve what you want, the swell of pride in your stomach after seeing your plan move with perfection.

being a slytherin means to be sharp and fast on your feet, quick and speedy and ready to run, run, run. because all you ever do is hide from the monsters and pray that someone else will slay them for you. because you are still a normal human being.

but being a slytherin means shattering one of your precious rules to help out a friend, to make them happy because you are loyal and you pick your companions wisely.

because being a slytherin means being a bitch and dropping the people who are toxic in your lives, because you know you deserve better.

being a slytherin means that you are the person people go to when they’re in need of a fighter, a person who doesn’t back down from danger because you will protect them because you are fierce and you will not step away from a challenge if it’s for someone you care for.

being a slytherin means ending the relationship first or never starting it at all because you don’t want to feel weak, you don’t want to cry when everything finishes. because you’d rather feel nothing than lose everything.

because a slytherin is sharp clothing, tight jeans and a wicked smirk, but it is also a fierce longing for everyone you care for to be safe. an ambition to keep your rules straight and to abide them so your life isn’t messy and it’s organized and neat.

because being a slytherin means sacrificing your own feelings to watch your beloved be happy, careful to overstep because you don’t want to lose something you never had in the first place.