tyler seguin body issue

Lord Santa

Summary: It was the night before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring—save for Killian Jones’s three children, apparently.

A/N: I didn’t know I was going to write until today when I got two free periods because my Kindergartners and 1st graders were watching Polar Express, so, surprise! It’s 100% inspired by the Bob’s Burgers episode “Father of the Bob”, and credit for some of the lines goes to them.

Also on: AO3



It was the night before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring—save for Killian Jones’s three children, apparently.

Having just seen them all off to bed, Killian is surprised and a bit disgruntled to hear their voices. It’s late, he and Emma are exhausted from another raucous Christmas Eve party at Granny’s, and both of them desire nothing more than to put the gifts from Santa under the tree and crawl into their own bed, to dream of sugar plums or whatever.

Emma pauses halfway through changing out of her dress and into a pair of pajamas. “Will you go deal with that?” she sighs. “They listen to you.”

“No, they don’t,” Killian sighs back, stripping off his undershirt and dropping it to the floor. “Our children answer to no one, but they especially don’t answer to their father.”

“Please,” Emma says, pleadingly.

He struggles for a moment, his need for sleep wrestling with his sense of duty, until the good husband in him pins and strangles the selfish voice that’s screaming for his pillow and blanket and Emma in his arms.

“Alright, Swan. I’ll go be the bad guy,” he says. He finds his flannel sleep pants and a clean t-shirt and finishes dressing.

“I love you,” Emma tells him as he leaves their room, and he grumbles wordlessly in response.

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