tw: klepto

Lift Tip By Store

This place is seriously so easy. For beginner lifters, know that BARCODES DO NOT TRIGGER THE ALARMS. Expensive perfumes rarely have RFIDs or soft tags.
Cosmetics- Just slip stuff into your bag, it’s that easy.
Food- Get a basket, fill it up, go to the front, grab a reusable bag, pretend like you forgot something, conceal in seasonal, and then meander out.
Furniture- Who the fuck do you are?
Clothes- Just slip into bag. BARCODES DO NOT SET OFF ALARMS JESUS
Electronics- Target don’t fuck around with electronics. Just keep lifting and returning stuff to build store credit or something.

Actually I think everyone working there must be literally retarded.
Electronics- Just conceal. When you’re trying to leave, wait till someone with a packed cart (and with kids if you’re lucky) tries to leave. Walk out with them, and when the alarm goes off, give the family an accusing look and keep walking.
Cosmetics- Take and conceal in Pet Supplies.
Food- Same as target.
Clothes- I’ve never taken Walmart clothes ew.

Little trickier. Bring wire cutters, a huge bag, and accomplices if you can.
Handbags- Most are untagged, but Michael Kors and other really high end bags are tagged. Cut the wires. They won’t beep.
High End Cosmetics- Politely evade the annoying sa and cleverly conceal as you go.
Clothes- They tag everything, bring a hook.
Shoes- Check thoroughly for tags.
Clarisonic- Wait and conceal. They never beep.

Claire’s and Icings:
Are you 9? Just avoid mirrors and go cray.

Clothes- Never tagged. Conceal in baby.
Jewelry- conceal in baby.
Appliances- little ones are easy, just conceal.

If you have a hook, this store is so easy.

Most things aren’t tagged. Bring a hook just in case.

Stick the dildo up your ass

Hot Topic:
Bring a hook. Not that it matters, the sa are just as bored and misunderstood as you are

Take one shoe from a box, get the match from a different box. Conceal.

Beauty- conceal as you go
Clothes- Bring a hook
Shoes- you need a hook


First haul since flu! Jesus it’s been three weeks since my last haul


Shirt- $20

Tank- $10

Thongs- $5 x2

Color Tattoo (in Inked in Pink)- $5.94

Boots No 7 Beautifully Matte Foundation- $14

elf Eyeshadow C Brush- $3.00

elf Blush/Bronzer Duo- $3.00

elf Makeup Remover Pen- $3.00

Topcoat- $7

Charming Charlie’s:

Bracelet- $13.00

Watch- $15.00

Random earrings- $2.00?

Bath and Body Works (cough fucking buffet cough):

Body Lotion- $12.50 x3

Body Cream- $20.50

Shower Gel- $12.50

Bubble Bath- $14.00

Total: $190.44

So my trick with Target has been to go in the middle of a weekday when nobody is there and wait for the dressing room attendant to get distracted (it doesn’t take long), which allows me to enter the dressing room without telling her how many items I have. It was funny today because I got this knockoff bag for lifting (I literally only chose it because it’s big and easy to conceal in) and today two employees from different stores asked me if it’s a Michael Kors, and I’m thinking ‘No, but it’s full of shit I’m stealing from your store.’

anonymous asked:

How'd you lift from vs? Do you have any tips?

  1. Use an in-store shopping tote. It covers the amount of items you have, especially if you are throwing smaller items like underwear in. 
  2. If you’re taking makeup, again the tote does wonders. 
  3. Only conceal in the dressing rooms, they usually won’t count your items and sometimes a dressing room is already open and you don’t have to ask for assistance at all. 
  4. If you absolutely cannot conceal in a dressing room and only have the floor, hold the tote and your purse on the same arm very close, so when you drop something in a small opening of your personal bag, it seems like it’s going in the tote.
  5. Beware that their bras and clothes are tagged and you need to use a hook. 
  6. When the personnel comes to ask if you need help, let seem like their actually helping, ask if they have xy or z, like a certain scent in stock. It usually calms them down. You can always put it down later if they bring it to you. 
  7. Always ALWAYS keep your ears open. The personnel communicates via headsets, if anything sounds off, or pointed in your general direction- covertly drop your stuff, “browse” a bit more, then suddenly get a call (call upon your acting skills) and leave, better to be safe than sorry.  

Happy Lifting,


Bountiful PokeBalls

Well, I believe that I accomplished something today. What about you guys? Today, I hit up the mall with a friend (who actually bought stuff) and swiped stuff like it was nobody’s business. We did beep 5 times though… I believe it’s that damn purse I got a while back. (Idk where the fuck the trigger is to stop setting off the alarm.) Anyway, this is all the stuff I got. 

So all the stores we went to in order:

  • Claire’s
  1. Rings - $14.50
  2. Jade(ish) ring - $10.50
  3. Earrings (not shown) - $18.50
  4. 3D Nails - $30
  5. Faux Nails - $12
  6. Friendship bracelets (not shown) - $8.50
  • Bath & Body Works
  1. Body Lotions - $25
  2. Perfume - $14
  3. Hand Sanitizer - $3.50
  • Victoria Secret
  1. Noir Tease - $25
  • Ulta
  1. Mascara - $7
  2. Eye Liners - $10
  3. Chocolate bar Palette - $49
  • Francesca’s
  1. Prayer Box - $12
  • EarthBound
  1. Fan - $4
  2. Oils - $60
  3. Statues - ?
  4. Earrings - $10
  5. Soap - $6
  • JcPenney
  1. Capris - $50
  2. Shorts - $44
  3. Backpack - $40
  4. Bras - $171
  5. Belt - $20
  • Rue21
  1. Cuticle Oil - $4
  • Dick’s Sporting Goods
  1. Tanks - $50
  2. Sports bra - $35
  3. Shorts - $35
  4. Tights - $45
  • Old Navy
  1. Jacket w/ Shirt - $20
  • XX21
  1. Makeup bag - $7

Looking up the things I swiped without a tag, was a bitch. Like omo. Anyway, the whole total is: $840.50

So close-!

I took some other things also, but I gave them to said friend mentioned earlier, so I won’t count those. 

Ok ok!! so i think i came up with the perfect lifting technique if you feel paranoid. THIS IS NOT FOR IF YOU"RE PARANOID CAUSE YOU THINK UR BEING WATCHED.This would be more if your already a little paranoid before going into the store. 

 Since lifting is more acting then anything this is perfect. You go into the store as you normally would and browse. Grab some of the things you want and some you don’t. Walk around with everything visible and as you hit your blind spots drop one or two items into your bag but keep things still in your hands. Do this until you have everything you want (While still grabbing and looking at other products.) It helps you keep your nerves down since u still have visible products and still look as if you intend to buy everything. Then when you only have what you don’t want left in your hands fake a phone call, act rushed or irritated or worried and drop what you have still in your hands and walk out as if you’ve had an emergency. As long as no one sees you drop anything in your bag you look like just an average shopper with a perfectly reasonable excuse to leave the store without purchasing anything. This works especially well if you’ve been in the store for a long while and it’d be unreasonable for you to leave with nothing.

This way you can browse as long as you like without feeling rushed or trying just to get in and get out. Just thought I’d share. If this tip is painfully obvious please forgive me for feeling like a genius, I’m sleep deprived and sick, it could be a fever. haha

I’m so proud of this haul! SO MUCH FREE PEOPLE!!!! And I finally lifted a Urban Decay Naked Pallet. I used the Starbucks Cup Method for that one and it worked like a charm! I am just over the moon!

Macy’s, Barnes & Nobles, Ulta, Paper Source

  • Free People Dresses and Blouses - $578.00
  • Ralph Lauren Pants - $89.50
  • Peter Rabbit Tote - $9.95
  • “Paradise Lost” by John Milton - $19.95
  • “Poems of the Night” by Jorge Luis Borges - $18.00
  • Urban Decay Naked Basics - $28.00
  • Pinch Provisions Mini Emergency Kit - $17.95

Total Savings: $761.35

anonymous asked:

Hey I'm sorry to bother, but I really wanna lift 2 ysl lipsticks from sephora but I'm shit scared cause I head a lot of ppl get caught. What do you think is the best way for me to get away with it? & are the boxes tagged?

(You’re not bothering at all! I love talking to people!) I’ve never lifted from a real Sephora, just the one inside of JC Penny’s. It was fairly easy for me, especially because I went at about 2:00 on a weekday (which is my personal favorite time to lift from anywhere.) This is all based on my personal experience and may not be the same for you. The Sephora part of the store was completely empty and there were two employees talking to each other and paying no attention to me. I don’t know about tagging. I lifted some Benefit products that were not tagged, and I didn’t see anything that was, but it could be different in your store. I would suggest shopping around the clothes sections first and finding a few large articles of clothing to sling over your arm. Bring them into the Sephora, take the things you want, and casually tuck them between the clothes and your body or hold them in your hand and slip the clothes over it. Then go to the dressing rooms to conceal. They didn’t count at the dressing rooms for me but this may not be the same for you. You may want to walk out of the Sephora holding them in plain sight and then go to a less crowded section of the JCP store to conceal, but this could be risky if a lot of people spot you with the makeup and then notice it all gone. Concealing on the (Sephora) floor may be possible but should be kept to a minimum, and it’s most advisable to do this on the outside shelves where the Sephora cameras can’t see you and you have your back turned to JCP store outside of the Sephora. (Random idea but no clue if this will work so don’t take my word: does JCP have those shopping totes to carry around with you in the store? Because that would make it too damn easy, to fill your bag up with makeup and then conceal in the dressing room. However, this would probably require buying one or two things and making an obvious show of putting things you don’t want back, because if you fill a bag up with makeup and buy nothing, that’s definitely suspicious.)

As for lifting from a real Sephora, I would say don’t unless you’re a pro. I won’t be lifting there until I have more experience if ever. Most people who’ve been caught seem to get caught there. However, I’ve seen some pretty big hauls from there, so it is possible. If you’re nervous, LP will absolutely notice and it will not end well. I don’t know how much lifting experience you have, but I would say if you haven’t already start at easy stores, which for me have been Ulta, CVS, and Target (though those may not be easy stores for you. It entirely varies by the individual store and your personal lifting style.)

This was probably more than you were expecting, but hey, I like to talk. (By the way, I’m not sure which YSL lipsticks you’re going for, but the glossy stains are THE SHIT. I need to lift them in every color.)

I’m still en route to Vivec City, as I was hanging around in the Ashlands for a while after lifting from Maar Gan, and I made a small haul while I was in the Urshilaku camp. :)

Common Amulet: 2 Septims

Common Ring: 2 Septims

Scroll of Psychic Prison: 261 Septims

Total Savings: 265 Septims!

You’ll all hear about my haul from Vivec City sometime tomorrow. I hope the Ordinators don’t catch me, ha!

Advice From Prof. Oak

When you see tips from the pros in this community, do not take them lightly like I did.

Them: I bring tape, scissors, etc. in my purse when I go lifting…

Me: Pfft, all I need are my hands. I’ll just dump the tags somewhere else.

No bitch, you need tape, scissors, and all the shit they mentioned ‘cuz those store workers are lurkin!

I found myself wishing I had a pair of scissors , so that popping noise of the tag wouldn’t catch the other shoppers attention. One pop and the whole changing room was silent. The tape was necessary too when I was in Charlotte Russe. I only swiped a few things and tags were abundant for some reason. I needed to get rid of that crap.

Lesson Learned: Bring scissors, tape, and everything else. (Where the fuck was that post that mentioned all this?)

Side Note: Old pregnant grandmas are quite persistent when trying to open an occupied changing room.


If you want to be a criminal, think like one.  If you are smart and clever, this information will seem helpful to you despite not getting too much out of it. You can always work on your game and intelligence by knowing how the system works.




omg my biggest haul yet so proud


Too Faced Smokey Eye Palette: $36

Benefit They’re Real! Mascara: $23

Lipstick Queen Invisible Lip Liner: $18

Anastasia Beverly Hills Brow Wiz: $21

Tarte Amazonian clay blush in Fearless: $26

Dermablend Concealer: $22

Revlon nail polish in Wild Violets: $6

Revlon Lipstick in Sky Line Pink: $7

Maybelline Color Tattoo in Barely Branded: $7

Dick’s Sporting Goods:

Yoga socks: $9

Underwear x2: $12

Tennis ball: $1?

Total: exactly $200

Ulta was really easy today, nobody was paying attention. I could have lifted a Naked palette but I decided that when I do that I’m going to the other Ulta in the area because it’s easier. I’m not super into sports but there’s a Dick’s in the same shopping center as Ulta and I’ve heard their LP is shit so I went there after (it’s super easy. I wish I was more into sports. Maybe I’ll boost some stuff from there?) The tennis ball was kind of sitting out by itself outside of any packaging so I grabbed it for my dog and the price was just a guess.

anonymous asked:

How can you live with yourself? Shoplifting? Do you honestly have nothing better to do with your life? Can you do this and still consider yourself a good person? I'm telling you right now, there is not a single thing considered acceptable about your "hobby". You're not smart. You're the reason actual shoppers get screwed over. You steal, the stores raise their prices to cover your stolen goods, the shoppers can't afford the new prices and abuse the workers (verbally and otherwise). I just can't.

Hey man, I may steal things but at least I’m not a twat to someone I’ve never even had a real conversation with. Now, let me fill you in on a few little secrets, 

  1. I’ve spent 347 hours volunteering in the last three years, and I only needed 100 to graduate from my Catholic school.
  2. So many people AND store workers have told me I’m the nicest person they’ve ever talked to, and I also attend mass twice a week by myself. That’s right, my family doesn’t drag me into church, I willingly attend, drive myself, everything. 
  3. Not smart? That makes me laugh the most because I’ve got a full ride coming from Columbia college due to the fact that they’ve taken such an interest in my art. I’ve got straight A’s in all of my AP classes, so I’m pretty sure that makes me smart. 
  4. If a shopper actually physically abuses a worker due to raised prices, they’ll get arrested and probably sued. So my “hobby” could possibly get someone enough money to live comfortably for the rest of their life once they settle out of court. 

Now, please come fill me in on everything that you do that makes you a good person. Please, come tell me about how you’re completely perfect and have never done anything that’s frowned upon. 

Next time you try to attack this community, at least have the sheer decency to send us all individualized hate messages. ♡