turtle-backpack

anonymous asked:

"crazy detention stories"...go

They’re really not that crazy I don’t think but fine- but as I had detention at least once a week for 3 years you’re only getting the highlights here:

  • So again, I only ever got detentions because I was late to school basically every day. Every single day, the office wrote me a late slip with my name spelled horrendously wrong. Different spelling every day. The most famous butchering was writing my name as “Millie Hoagie”. On my very last day of high school, I was predictably late, and they spelled my name perfectly correctly.
  • So listen my ‘reputation’ in school was basically “quiet good girl who’s never done anything wrong, ever, in her life” and “teacher’s pet” and the like. And despite the fact I was there every time all the ‘Bad Kids™’ who were also always in detention were always incredibly surprised to see me??? Like they never got over it. Every time I walked into the damn room at least half the class would be like “MOLLY YOU DON’T BELONG HERE YOU’RE INNOCENT!!” 😂
  • Also despite the fact I was basically invisible in the school as a whole all the trouble makers knew me by name because, and I quote a kid from my 10th grade Spanish class who was trying to hook up with me at the time here, “Guys like me are afraid of you, Girl, we’re just plain out scared that we gonna corrupt you!” and I still don’t know what he actually meant by that???
  • Bu anyway, this apparent rep usually gave me an upper hand with the teachers monitoring the detentions. Because, you know, some were fine, some were bitchy, some were insane. But all of them were pissed about the fact they had to be there instead of heading home.
  • The rules of detention were literally just ‘stare at the wall and don’t talk’, depending on which teacher they might let the students do homework. But since I was apparently a great person and always had the class’ incredulous response to me being in the room, they usually let me get away with sleeping or reading a book lol.
  • Of course…no one said any of the other kids were inclined to following the rules lmao. These were like, all the class clowns™ shoved into one room. Things always got real funny real fast.
  • It would always start off with the coughing game. If you’ve ever stepped into a school you should know what that is.
  • It would then escalate to everyone in the room playing catch whenever the teacher looked away for a brief moment
  • Detention was always in the health classroom so someone always tried to steal a limb off the skeleton without being to obvious
  • Some teachers would let people talk ‘quietly’ so jokes were fucking abound
  • One time I was minding my own damn business and a kid slides me a note saying ‘in like five minutes ask to go to the bathroom but head downstairs to the English wing’ before he snuck out without the teacher noticing. I get down there and he’s at one end of the hallway and another boy is at the other end. Upon seeing me, these boys run full speed down the hall at each other, leap up in the air when they get to the direct center, high five with full force, both scream in pain, and then hit the floor, clutching their hands. I was cracking the fuck up and trying to convince them to go to the nurse but they wouldn’t listen. I asked the guy why the hell they did that. He told me ‘because we wanted a witness and no one will ever believe you’ 😂😂
  • One time my sorta-neighbor Mike comes in and the teacher asked why he had detention and apparently, the principal had asked him where to find his friend Jose, and Mike responded “he’s out picking cotton” and the principal flipped out at what he perceived to be a racist joke and gave him a month detention. But the thing was, Jose was in an agriculture class and he was literally outside picking cotton that they had planted there earlier. Jose found it fucking hilarious and refused to tell the principal to get his friend out of trouble.
  • As I haven’t been inside a school building for quite some time now I don’t know if turtling is still a thing but it was…quite an epidemic for my senior class.
  • It’s when you turn someone’s backpack inside out right? But it was a full blown war with these kids. Trust no one. Never leave the room. Never look away. Holy shit. One of the best moments of this occurred in detention, when a boy reached to get a book out of his backpack to find it was gone. After 15 minutes of searching the room, he found it, turtled, hidden in a filing cabinet in the front of the room. Everyone, including the teacher, was loosing their shit, because how did someone pull that off so quietly and invisibly without someone noticing??? No one fessed up. The class was in fear of the turtle ninja for the rest of the month, but they never struck again. No one ever discovered who it was.
  • Guys: It was me.
  • One time it was raining and the teacher was in a bad mood so he insisted all the windows stay open. He left for a bathroom break or something and this one poor kid, who was now completely soaked as he was stuck with a window seat, just said “fucking bye” and just…climbed out the damn window. Left his backpack and everything. Didn’t see him again for at least a month.
  • There was one guy who always sold ice cream out of his bag when the teachers weren’t looking. Where he was getting it from and how it stayed frozen is beyond me.
  • Oh my God sometimes all the indie singer kids would just come and sit on the floor outside the classroom and talk loudly to annoy us??? The hell were they trying to accomplish??? Your singing ain’t special and you won’t be famous, please let us die in peace.
  • One kid had detention because when we were running laps in gym class he jumped up to hit the arch of the ceiling and accidentally set off the fire alarm. The teacher that day insisted on continuously referring to him as ‘the delinquent’, as if no one else in the room had broken the rules or something
  • One time one of the gym teachers was in charge of it and long story short he started doing the jersey turnpike. True horror.
  • One time the teacher got a call and she had to go down to the office and the second she was gone this one kid’s friend runs in with a huge tray going “Y’ALL I STOLE THE LASAGNE CUPCAKES FROM THE FOOD AND NUTRITION CLASSROOM” and we dined like kings.
  • Everyone would sometimes just break out in song for no God damn reason
  • One time one of the guys in charge of the detention was A) Not someone anyone recognized as a teacher and B) Potentially Stanley Tucci. Like…I was about 80% certain that this guy was Stanley Tucci.
  • He refused to confirm or deny or even give a name
  • One time I was really absorbed in my book when all the sudden a letter flew onto my desk, an anonymous sender that just said “You have a soft, sexy voice.” Neither of which is true, I’m pretty sure, and I could not for the life of me figure out who sent it omfg
  • One time a teacher was freaking out because he went to a psychic over the weekend and was told there was a lot of activity around him so I looked him straight in the eyes and told him I’m a medium and I can see that the devil had marked his soul and he threw me out of the room and refused to take that class for detention ever again😂
  • It was a hot summers day. The ceiling fans were on their highest setting. A boy nudges me, with a small carton of ice cream in his hands under his desk. “What do you think would happen if I scooped out a huge chunk of this and threw it at the fan?” he whispered. “Jamil, no.” I pleaded, but it fell on deaf ears. Soon, the room was filled with confused screams.
  • Apparently all the other regulars™ had bought me candy grams around Christmas time so they were confused when I showed up to detention with no candy and apparently the student council member sent them all to the other Molly in the grade because she was the popular one and this lead to about 12 boys grumbling for two and a half hours like “The one damn time I attempt to be a gentleman” and “I know where she lives” and “Gonna gingerbread her fucking locker” I could not stop laughing
  • Oh God okay one time the teacher we had was literally. Off the charts.
  • Like there’s the chill teachers, and then the bitchy teachers. And then this lady. She literally reminded me of Stubel
  • So I didn’t even know who she was but I walk in and do my shy smile/quiet ‘hello’ thing and take out my book so she immediately zeros in on me as ‘the good kid’ as usual
  • But she literally seemed to think every other person in this class was a hardened criminal holy shit. She was all over the place barking orders and yelling. And of course, you’ve got a room full of class clowns, like they feed off teachers like this. So the madder she got the more ridiculous they got. I was literally almost in tears trying to force myself not to laugh because I didn’t want to risk her turning on me omfg
  • So she yelled and flailed about the room and they kept going with jokes and paper wasps and lying about their names and just doing literally every thing they could possibly do so this woman wouldn’t have the chance to rest
  • This escalated with every minute and came to a resounding end when the teacher decided the Australian Kid™ was chewing gum and picked up the trashcan and shoved his face in it, screaming at him to spit it out as he yelled back “YOU’RE ONLY DOING THIS BECAUSE IM AN IMMIGRANT
  • he was in charge of all the bullshit that day and it was hysterical but he wasn’t the one chewing gum loudly that was me
  • The vp came in to see what all the yelling was about to find a teacher shoving a boy’s head in the trash, one boy shirtless as another drew tattoos on him, the phone off the line with it’s cord wrapped around a kid’s neck, two boys dueling with skeleton arms, one kid with her leg out the window, a kid tying a skeleton foot to the ceiling fan, rubber bands and paper wasps flying from every angle, three people turtling backpacks, someone brandishing an epi-pen, sexual hangman being played on the chalkboard, someone eating ice cream and fanning himself with money, and me, crying into my book with my hand literally bleeding from all my efforts to not laugh at what I was witnessing
  • We never saw her in detention again😂
  • My one younger friend got a detention for being late and was really shaken up about it and I tried to tell her she’d be fine but then she got caught sliding me chocolate animal crackers during it, and subsequently got another detention because of this; somehow I was not viewed as an equally guilty party and didn’t get in trouble
  • This one guy came in complaining “You guys all told me to get a twitter and I get thrown in twitter jail my first day!” “That’s like a thousand tweets in one day, how the fuck did you mange that?” “Bitch I had a lot to say about McDonalds!”
  • One teacher came in and was like “I don’t feel like helping with homework but does anyone wanna learn how to hack a computer?”
  • Someone got caught pouring water out the window but when the teacher looked to see why she saw the youngest of the goats™ standing under the window with it’s mouth open waiting for more
  • One time the teacher wouldn’t let me go to the bathroom and after I asked for like the 5th time he said “It can’t be that important!” so I just pulled a pad out of my backpack and silently sat it on my desk while glaring at him and this 40 year old man looked like he was about to pass out and he finally let me go
  • I remember our final detention of senior year we were told that if we skip it we can’t graduate so everyone went into that room with a ridiculously nostalgic attitude and one guy finally stole the skull off the skeleton and we fucking tossed it around the entire time while singing and blatantly ignoring the teacher’s complaining lmao
  • I know there’s more but it’s 7am and this is long so all in all like…I do not miss high school but some memories are bearable lmao
Trick or Treat

Pairing: Jackson x OC
Genre: Fluff; Dad AU
Word Count: 1200+
Summary: Bets were made and the loser wears whatever the winner picks as their costume. Secret Prompt: I really don’t care. You still look hot and I’m trying not to kiss you senseless right now.
Author’s Note: KpopTrashNetwork Collab Project with @katbeom and @knockknocksoosthere. Check out the masterlist here!



You walked down the busy sidewalk. Many creatures and monsters caught your eyes. Ghosts, vampires, zombies — all running back and forth across the way. Laughter and chatter echoed through the streets as it was nearly dusk. There was still a warm orange glow spilling into the dark gray skies that covered the neighborhood.  Houses were decorated for the festive holiday – cobwebs intertwined on porch rails, tombstones laid in the front yards and smoke machines were being used to create the perfect eerie atmosphere.

The October air was brisk enough to feel a chill and for the first time that evening,  you were thankful for your costume because it at least provided you with some warmth. You glanced down at your teal blue pants and yellow leotard. You grimaced at the situation. I can’t believe he won.

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Nino Appreciation Week: Day 7- Nino at Night

It’s overwhelming, everything that’s happening now. That’s probably why he found himself somewhere so quiet, less than an hour shy of closing. He was just walking… lost in himself and all of his doubts and excitments and hesitations and everything else, pacing through the low blue light… when he heard the tail end of a story. 

It was a little boy with a brand new turtle shell backpack, his voice bouncing off the glass as he looked up at the massive, hovering sea turtles and told them about a hero. His hero, the hero who was going to change everything. 

The little boy didn’t see him as he stopped short, caught up in the image of the huge gentle creatures and the way they seemed to… listen. And he was caught up,too in the little boy, wondering how, quite by chance, he would find this child’s faith in this dark, safe space. 

anonymous asked:

Can u do a one shot where andreil have a daughter and it's like her first day of school or something domestic like that pleaseeeee

hello lovely anon, i have attempted to grant thine wish. also on AO3

send me prompts :)


Still mostly asleep, Neil rolls onto his left side, bringing himself further into Andrew’s space. He snakes out a cautious hand, expecting to run into King’s soft fur where he often sleeps in between them. Instead, he is met with empty space, right up until his hand accidentally brushes Andrew’s ribs. This incites only a small flinch, whereas years ago, Andrew would have startled awake on high alert, reaching under his pillow for an ever-present knife. The progress makes Neil smile.

He continues his search in the dark for his absent cats, as he has now also noticed the lack of Sir’s weight at the bottom of the bed. He sits up, eyes flitting to the door that they now leave cracked open at night. It is almost completely ajar.

“Hi,” comes a small voice from the far side of the room, making Neil jump slightly in surprise.

He sits up and looks over at the small armchair in the corner to see Piper curled up with both missing cats asleep on her lap. She has dragged in her favorite navy blue blanket, a gift from Renee the previous Christmas, and made herself a rather comfortable-looking nest.

Neil glances to the clock on the bedside table. It reads 5:47am.

“Hey, Pipes,” he croaks out. “What’s up? Is everything okay?”

“Mhmm. Couldn’t sleep. Too excited.” That excitement is clear in her voice, but she’s trying to keep quiet so the three still sleeping creatures in the room won’t be disturbed.

They discover that her efforts were in vain as a muffled, “Why would you possibly be excited for school?” comes from beneath the covers somewhere to Neil’s left. Andrew pulls himself up into a sitting position, mirroring Neil and moving closer to him, their shoulders touching as they gaze at the little girl who has unintentionally woken them both.

“Daaaaad, you know how important a good education is these days.”

“Yeah okay, sure, but you’re six years old. Ivy Leagues aren’t going to judge your grades from kindergarten,” Andrew insists. “And furthermore, it doesn’t really matter, because any day now the zombie apocalypse is going to make higher education obsolete.”

Neil can’t hold back his smile as the two launch into the argument they have at least once a week. She may be six years old, but she’s smarter than the two of them combined.

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Domestic jeffmads/lams au: Chapter One

Credits: @hxxtile Lucy is their character, I just decided to make a story.

Word Count: 2000

Warning: Swearing

Plot: Lucy Jefferson starts Junior high with Philip Hamilton (who she hates) and is pretty sure she has her life figured out, until she meets Theodosia Burr Jr. (that’s it, it’s basically Lucy just figuring out her sexuality and who she is and having her dads be there every step of the way)


A/N: I hope you enjoy ??? maybe ???




      “First day of junior high! Are you nervous?” Thomas handed Lucy a plate with toast, scrambled eggs and sausage links. “It’s totally fine if you are, you don’t have to go if you’re not ready! We can call the office and tell them you’re sick or something.” He was rambling now. Lucy looked up at her dad and took a bite of her sausage. This was a thing that he did every time she hit some big ‘milestone’ in her life.

   "Of course my daughter isn’t nervous, she’s a Jefferson! Isn’t that right, Lucy?“ James came into the dining room, still in his maroon bathrobe, and ruffled her hair. When he tried to pull his hand out, it got stuck. "Jesus, do you ever brush this head of yours?” He asked once he had finally released himself from her hair.

     Lucy was about to respond when Thomas scoffed, handing his husband his plate, “You never seem to complain when you’re pulling on mine.” He raised a brow. James blushed. Lucy gagged and threw a wadded up napkin at him. Thomas gave her a challenging look and threw it back. Lucy stuck her tongue out and her father copied before they both began laughing.

     "God, you guys are basically the same person.“ James took a seat next to Lucy and Thomas sat on her other side. They began eating while their daughter, on the other hand, was halfway finished.

    "Philip should be here in about half an hour, have you picked out what you’re going to wear?” James asked. Lucy looked down at her current outfit which was an oversized pink hoodie that almost covered her purple skirt. Her matching purple flats awaited at the door. She looked back up at James as he looked over her outfit. “Lucy, it’s your first stay of school! Don’t you think what you’re wearing is…” He looked over at his husband for help.

      “Absolutely adorable!” Thomas gushed. Lucy smiled at her dad. “Don’t listen to your dad! You look just fine, you’re going to be the most popular sixth grader there I can see it now!” Thomas looked at Lucy with hearts in his eyes. He felt so proud, it was like he was staring at a younger, smaller, female version of himself.

     "Thanks, Papa,” Her voice was small and smooth but strong at the same time. Thomas fell apart at the large smile she offered him. “Also, I don’t see why junior high is such a big deal?” She turned to James, “From what I’ve heard, it’s the same as elementary. High school is where the real juicy stuff happens. Dances, sports, dating…”

     James choked on his orange juice, “Dating?” He asked, looking down at the eleven year old. She nodded eagerly.

    “Yeah, papa! Dad said the two of you met in high school, right?” Thomas nodded and sipped on his coffee, “He told me that you guys met at a party that aunt Angelica threw! Apparently you were playing truth or dare and Alexander dared Papa to…”

      “Mr. Jeffersons!!!” Philip’s squeaky voice was heard from the other side of the front door, “The doors unlocked but mom told me it’s impolite to walk into people’s houses unannounced so this is me announcing myself!” Thomas sighed in relief. He never thought he’d be so happy to hear a Hamilton’s voice.

     He stood up gave James an apologetic smile. Lucy stood as well and gave James a kiss on the cheek. “Wish me luck, dad!” She gave him a toothy grin. James smiled gave her a thumbs up. She ran over to Thomas who was holding her Powerpuff Girls backpack and a twenty dollar bill.

    “Make sure no bully tries to steal your lunch money,” Thomas whispers, “And by bully I mean Phillip.” He handed her the backpack and cash and kissed her forehead. Lucy nodded and saluted Thomas before closing her eyes, taking a deep breath and opening the door.

     “Dramatic much?” Philip asked when Lucy let the breath out. She opened her eyes and looked Philip up and down. He wore a plain blue short-sleeved shirt, with a turtle pin on his chest. His hands were in the pockets of his cargo shorts and he wore sky blue vans to match his shirt. He wore his curly hair in a bun, but a few strands fell out of it and into his face. He also had a turtle shell backpack. “You ready to go?”  When Lucy walked past him without a word he shrugged and turned to the door where James and Thomas stood, watching their interactions. “Bye, Mr. Jeffersons! I’ll make sure your daughter won’t get bullied!”

    James waved and closed the door, turning to Thomas, “Why do I feel like it’s going to be Lucy protecting Philip?”

     Thomas shrugged, “It probably will.”



 

     “Okay, first things first! Stay away from the back of the bus.” Lucy gave Phillip a confused look, “That’s where the eighth graders sit. The very front is for the fifth graders, who only come to the junior high for band. Then there’s us, the sixth graders, then seventh. And then the back four seats. Basically thrones.”

   “You know this how?” Lucy asked as they approached the bus stop.

   “I’m in band, duh! I left my violin at mom’s house though so she’s dropping it off later today.”

    “Nerd.” Lucy giggled under her breath. Phillip glared at her but she only continued to laugh, which made him even angrier. He balled his hands into fists and stomped ahead to the bus stop. He doesn’t even know why he bothers with her. Lucy caught up to him, still laughing, and looked around, “Hey, braces, how come we’re the only ones here? This stop used to be filled with kids.”

     “That was for elementary, idiot. We’re like, the only sixth graders in this part of the neighborhood. We’re also the first stop, so we get good seats. Don’t sit next to me though, I have friends.”

      “That’s a lie,” Lucy laughed and turned when she heard the bus coming down the road. ‘Here we go’ she thought to herself. The bus pulled up in front of them and the doors opened to reveal an old, fat, white man who was a few years away from losing his teeth. Lucy could tell, because when he smiled down at them, his mouth was a mess of brown and yellow.

       “Well, hello there, Pip! Who is this?” He asked.

       “Mornin’, Bill! This is Lucy, I’m supposed to be showing her the ropes!” Lucy rolled her eyes behind Philip who was smiling proudly.

      “Oh! And I see you got a little upgrade over the summer?” Philip was confused at first, “Your braces, kid. You didn’t have them last year if I recall. When’d you get those?”

    “A few weeks ago,” Philip began to talk about the experience, but Lucy was honestly trying to get to school.

     She cleared her throat, “Excuse me, Bill? Don’t you have other stops to get to?” Philip rolled his eyes and mouthed something to the old man, which got him laughing hysterically. Lucy crossed her arms and glared at the two.

      “I’m sorry, ma’am, won’t happen again.” Bill said through laughter, he high fived Philip before the curly haired boy began walking down the aisle. Lucy sighed and followed. She took a seat two seats in front of Philip and on the other side of the aisle, not wanting to sit next to him. When the bus started moving she smiled and looked out the window and at the passing houses.

        After three stops, the bus was almost filled with kids talking about their summer and new outfits and whatnot. Philip’s friends were even on the bus as well. Everyone knew everyone. Except Lucy. She mentally cursed her dads for making her go to a private school, but also thanked them, because a majority of the kids on this bus were in desperate need of a shower.

     At the fourth stop, though, the boredom was knocked right out of Lucy. After a few eighth and seventh graders, a sixth grade girl walked onto the bus, looking down at her phone with furrowed brows. She had her dreadlocks pulled back into a high pony-tail and wore a pink shirt that read “#Vote4Burr!” in blue lettering. She wore dark blue denim shorts, black flats and a stitch backpack that was covered in pins from shows such as Bob’s Burgers, Adventure Time, she even had a few Melanie Martinez ones. “This is the bus to WJHS, right?” She had asked. A few kids in the back laughed but she seemed to either ignore them, or not care. Lucy liked that.

    When Bill nodded, she smiled anxiously and began typing vigorously into her phone, walking down the aisle. Lucy wanted to say something when she passed her and walked to the eighth grade section, but she was too late. The whole bus had gone quiet as well and watched her.

      “Hey, you, what grade are you in?” An eighth grader, who Philip had referred to as Mia, asked, the bus began moving, causing the girl to stumble a bit.

     She looked up from her phone and stuck it in her back pocket, “Sixth, why?” She asked. Lucy thought that the girl was genuinely confused, but Mia took it as sass.

    “I don’t know who you think you’re talking to, but I’m gonna need you to lose the attitude.” Mia replied coldly. Lucy was getting mad now.

    “Hey, leave her alone! She was just confused, you douche!” Lucy stood and turned around to glare at Mia from the front of the bus. A chorus of Ooh’s was heard from the bus, Mia’s face began to turn red and she stood up from her seat.

     Another eight grader, who had their ear buds in, heard the commotion and took them out. They took one look at Mia and the confused girl and sighed, standing up as well. “Mia, sit the fuck down. It’s obviously this kid’s first day, don’t make it as hard for them as it already is.” The person’s voice was calm yet stern as they spoke to Mia who crossed her arms and sat down and pulled out her phone with a huff, but it turned soft and sympathetic when they turned to the still confused and honestly bewildered girl, “I don’t know if you know this, but the back seats are taken for eighth graders, you can sit up front, though.” They smiled down at the girl.

      “Thank you,” She breathed out and turned around to walk back down the aisle. All the seats were taken except for (conveniently) the one next to Lucy. “Can I sit here?” She asked hopefully. Lucy felt her face grow hot and she nodded. Her first new friend, wow. “Thanks for defending me by the way.” She smiled after taking a seat.

      Lucy nodded back with a nervous grin and couldn’t help but peek over at the girl as she pulled her phone back out. Lucy wasn’t allowed to have a phone (Thomas disagrees but James thinks she too young) so she was nothing short of surprised to see that the girl had an IPhone 7 in her small hands. The lock screen was a selfie taken of her and a man (bald) laughing at how they looked with the snapchat dog filter. When she unlocked the phone (with her thumb print, which also amazed Lucy) the home screen was her and the same man with the flower crown filter, smiling whole heartedly. Lucy smiled, guessing that man was her father and turned back to look out the window silently.

     “I’m Theodosia Burr Jr., but you can just call me Theo.” The girl spoke as the bus finally left their neighborhood. Lucy looked over at the girl, who was smiling and holding her hand out.

     “I’m Lucy Jefferson, nice to meet you, Theo.” She smiled back and took her hand.

     “Nice to meet you, Lucy.”

Childhood story #3

Sasuke the explorer

“Say backpack”

“Backpack”

“Say backpack”

“Backpack!” Shisui rolled his eyes in an annoyed manner, he looked over his math book to his youngest brother who was sitting right in front of the TV.

“Turn it down” Shisui ordered, only to be ignored. “Princess” He put his book down and was ignored again. “Princess!”

Sasuke finally turned his head and Shisui wished he could scold his 5 years old brother for being so oblivious, but those innocent, doll-like eyes just screamed innocence. Besides, Shisui had noted before that Sasuke had the talent of completely blocking his surroundings and put 100% of his focus on one thing, which was mostly the TV.

“Turn it down” Shisui repeated.

“I am watching it”

“The volume, princess, the volume, I could not have been clearer!” Shisui leaned his head on his hands.

“Alright” He grabbed the remote control and turned the volume down, looking back at Shisui to see some sort of approval.

“That is good” Shisui said, looking back at the equation.

“Heeyy, little dinosaur!” Fugaku grabbed Sasuke from under his armpits and threw him in the air, immediately getting his youngest son’s attention.

“Rawr!” Sasuke roared loudly.

“Last time I checked, t-rexes were one of the biggest dinosaurs” Shisui sighed. Why wasn’t the library open on Sundays? It would have gotten him through his homework so much faster.

“Hey, listen buddy” He put Sasuke on the couch and squatted in front of him. “I have to go to work”

“I wanna come! I wanna come!” Sasuke got on his knees and bounced on the couch. Fugaku put both his hands on Sasuke’s shoulder and forced him to sit still.

“Sure…you wanna cum” Shisui sniggered.
“You can’t, you have to be at least this tall” Fugaku put his hand up a random height and Sasuke stared at it.

“Can I stand on my toes?” He asked dead serious.

“No” Fugaku said bluntly. He stood up.

“But your brother will be babysitting you”

“I did not sign up for this” Shisui immediately responded.

“Five bucks” Fugaku negotiated.

“Pfff, no way, unless it is five bucks an hour”

“How about five bucks and you are not in a youth hostel?”

“You’re a bad dad, you know that?” Shisui cocked his head. Fugaku lifted his shoulders in a non-caring way.

“You will take care of him, don’t let him watch too much TV, oh…and if anything happens to him, it is on you”

“Why is it on me?”

“Should I blame a 5 years old or a 13 years old?” Fugaku raised a questionable eyebrow.

“Why not blame the dad who left the 13 years old in charge?” Shisui put his pen down.

“Damn boy, the more you grow up to more you start to sound like those attorney lawyers, annoying”

“The more I see this kind of injustice, the more I want to become a lawyer” Shisui leaned back in his chair and looked at his dad who was shaking his head.

“I will be back before dark” Fugaku stated, leaving his two sons alone.

Sasuke crawled off the couch and sat back in front of the TV. Shisui grabbed the remote control and turned it off, causing his younger brother to turn his head to Shisui.

“The TV. broke” He stated.

“Then you just have to do something else”

“Like?” The younger one stood up.

“Pff, go play with the ball in the backyard” Shisui suggested.

“Would you play with me?” Sasuke asked, it made Shisui chuckle again.

“Fuck no” Shisui shook his head before realizing what he just said. He looked back up.

“That is a no-no word” The younger one stated.

“Yes, it is…I was…testing you!” Shisui said.

“…Did I pass?” Sasuke asked, awkwardly looking around him.

“Yes, you did, go play in the backyard” Shisui picked his pen up and read the question over again. He turned the page on his notebook and started on a blank page.

Finally, some silence and alone time. Now the 13-years old could finally finish his darn math homework. Half an hour passed and Shisui looked up from the math problem. It was really quiet…maybe even…too quiet.

“Princess?!” Shisui called out, but didn’t get a response. He called again, but then decided to stand up and take a look himself.

“Sasuke?” Shisui muttered under his breath, seeing an empty backyard and…a back door that was swung open. “Sasuke!” He clenched a fist, “That annoying little brat!”

Shisui grabbed his shoes and the house keys before running out the back door and closing it behind him.

“Sasuke!” He shouted, walking through the allies and looking at the small parks nearby. Though the kid seemed to be gone. The anger turned into worry. What if the kid got grabbed by some weird perv?! Was math homework really worth his life?! For fuck’s sake, the kid was five, he must be scared and hungry…okay probably not hungry, but scared for sure!

“Say backpack, backpack, backpack!”

Shisui’s eyes widened and he turned his head to the left, seeing a familiar ninja turtle backpack and a dinosaur plushie. Sasuke sat on his knees in the grass and grabbed his backpack and grabbing what seemed like a bandaid. He unwrapped it and put it on the dinosaur plushie.

“We did it!” He threw his hands in the air and made a mini victorious trumpet sound.

He was playing…Dora the Explorer…no…more like..Sasuke the explorer…

Shisui wanted to smack the brat at least four times, but dealing with a crying kid wouldn’t really make his day easier. He wanted to walk towards him and just take him back home, but seeing him unroll a A4 paper with some stupid map drawn on it was too adorable to stop.

“So we slipped passed the ugly curly sheep-”

A imaginary brick fell on Shisui’s head…yeah…take a wild guess to who the ugly curly sheep was…

“Then we passed the forest of doom, now we have to go pass the rocky path and to the big red chicken!” Sasuke said to the plushie before putting his backpack back on and grabbing Mr.Roary.

In short, he was going to the petting zoo. Shisui sighed, but decided to follow his little brother from the background. Let him have this little adventure of his, it will make him tired and force him to take a nap. It would only be less trouble for the older Uchiha.

He silently walked behind Sasuke until he heard somebody call his name. He turned his head and saw the neighbour.

“How have you been?” She asked in a friendly way.

“Ah! Hey! Yea, I am doing fine”

“Good kid” She smiled kindly, “So…what are you doing behind a tree?”

“Uhm…I am watching my little brother, the youngest.” Shisui said and scratched the back of his head nervously. He looked from behind the tree and frowned seeing a man kneeling next to him, holding a lollipop.

“You want the candy?”

“I am not supposed to talk to strangers” Sasuke answered, looking at his map.

“I am no stranger, I am uncle Bob”

“What is a stranger?”

“A stranger is somebody you don’t know, but I am uncle Bob” The stranger said, moving the lollypop a little to catch Sasuke’s attention again.

“But do I know uncle Bob? No…so…you are a stranger to me” Sasuke said, folding his maps.

“You are such a smart kid, I have more candy for you…”

“Hold on…no…no..wait a minute!” Shisui ran towards them and swept Sasuke up, holding him close.

“Yeaaahh~ Shisui!” Sasuke laughed, thinking it was some sort of game.

“Get the fuck away from him!” Shisui shouted, “With your stupid candy! You know schools warn kids for people like you! You…you-”

“Poopie head!”

“Yeah! Poopie head!” Shisui said, pointing an accusing finger. “You should be in jail! Your mother should have had an abortion!”

“Shisui, it is me, uncle Bob! I’ve known you since you were 3 years old”

“Yeah right! I am going to call the police! Child molester! Child molester!”Shisui shouted, catching the attention of some adult that suddenly grabbed the man by his arm.

“Is this man bothering you, son?” One man asked.

“Yes! He tried to lure my baby brother!” Shisui said.

“We will handle him, kiddo” Another man said, folding his arm and narrowing his eyes to this Bob guy.

“Thank you” Shisui said, turning around.

“No, the red big chicken in the other way” Sasuke said, struggling against Shisui’s grip.

“No, we are going home, that is final!” Shisui stated, but got kicked in the stomach, forcing him to let go.

“You are mean!” Sasuke shouted as he landed on the ground and ran away.

“Sasuke! Goddamnit!” Shisui hissed, running after him. Sasuke jumped and climbed in a tree.

“Come immediately down!” Shisui demanded.

“No!” Sasuke said, climbing higher in the tree.

“Sasuke, you will fall!” Shisui shouted, Sasuke ignored him, but just as Shisui predicted, he set his foot on a weak branch and fell down.

“What did I tell you?!” Shisui knelt in front of his younger brother, examining him from top to bottom. Sasuke hugged his knees and started sobbing silently.

“You made yourself cry” Shisui stated, “I told you not to climb it, I told you to play in the backyard, what do you do? THE OPPOSITE!”

“I…I…wanted to…play…” Sasuke sulked, “You never want to play”

“Don’t put this on me, brat!”

“Madara doesn’t play with me, Obito doesn’t…you don’t…mommy keeps niisan away from me and…Izuna is playing with somebody else” Shisui sighed.

“That is not it, Sasuke, see, when you grow up…you have other responsibilities and sometimes…It takes over, look at me, I go to middle school, I have homework which does take priority, but…I am still here chasing you all the way…just to make sure you are safe”

Sasuke looked up, wiping his big tears away.

“Can you walk?” Shisui asked.

“Yes” Sasuke said, “But I still want you to carry me”

Shisui smiled, “Yes, princess” he carried Sasuke on his back.

“Can we still go and see the big red chicken?” Sasuke asked.

“Sure…Dora the Explorer” Shisui responded. It was not far anyway.

“Will you be Boots?”

“Uhm…yeah, whatever”

“You have to wear boots to be Boots”

“Well, I am not wearing boots”

“Then how are you Boots?” Sasuke asked.

“One more comment about boots and I will show you some place where I can shove a boot up”

“…You don’t have to go bananas”

“I will drop you” Shisui commented already annoyed.


OOXOXOXO

“Look, look nissan” Sasuke sat on Itachi’s lap and showed the map he had drawn. “We passed the ugly black curly sheep, then passed the forest of doom and then went on the rocky path to the big red chicken!”

“Ooh, and you drew that yourself?”

“Yes, yes!” Sasuke smiled when Itachi patted his head.

“It must have been quite the adventure, are you now Sasuke the explorer?”

“Yeah!” Sasuke smiled.

“More like Sasuke the troublesome” Shisui muttered, his head leaning on the armrest of the couch. It seemed he was the only one exhausted. The doorbell rang and the three looked at each other.

“I got it, I got it!” Izuna ran towards the door, but was picked up by Fugaku with one arm and thrown over his shoulder. They were goofing around before Fugaku opened the door, there was some talking in the hallway before Fugaku walked back in the living room with a man that seemed very familiar to Shisui.

“Kids, you remember uncle Bob, right?”

“…Fuck no…”


-special thanks to @failureoftheyear for editing-

anyways so whiskey’s mom is brazilian and his dad is chilean, here’s several bulletpoints about this important matter
  • his parents both moved to the US for college; his dad for undergrad and his mom for grad school
    • they are……… very academically minded, to say the least
    • telling your preschooler about what it’ll be like when he’s in grad school is not putting too much pressure on him, obviously, don’t be ridiculous
    • “practical, efficient, probably hereditary” GOD, way too close to the bone, dude, oh my god
  • he’s named andrés after his uncle on his dad’s side; sometimes his mom gives him terrible portuguese names for hell of it
    • “Assunção, pass the salt” is a running gag
    • they’re more than a little horrified when he starts going by ‘drew’ because he says it’s easier
      • “no one remembers to write it with the accent, and they can’t say it anyways” “carry a pen around and fix it then”
  • he really is just naturally shy, but some of it is also culture shock?
    • he gets around okay, but it’s just. there’s things he doesn’t get sometimes, you know?
      • he gets cultural references but he’s always a step behind the other kids
      • even when he was little, like in preschool, his best friend would bring in a ninja turtles backpack, and whiskey wouldn’t know the character, and his friend would be trying to play but first he’d have to explain the whole idea of a turtle that’s also a superhero
        • it was fun, eventually, but it’s….. not quite the same, hearing about things from someone else
      • he learns to just listen, a lot. he figures stuff out eventually.
    • it’s not that he has to translate for his parents, but. 
      • they’re not really. a whole lot of help with cultural stuff.
        • like, they can talk academically about the important cultural issues that affect the united states political system for hours, but… ten year old whiskey tries to explain that everyone else has a gameboy, and they just stare at him
          • everyone?” “yeah” “why?” “mamãe,” “andrés, do they not read books? can they read books? can you ask them if they own a book?” “maMÃE”
      • also…. school.
        • oh my god, school.
          • they can talk about history for hours but the stories they tell him are……… very much not the stories he hears in school
            • “Andrés, tell Ms. Jones that her pilgrim friends were colonialists”
  • Andrés is the oldest and is very much The Guinea Pig Baby
    • they can’t figure out what activities US kids usually do so they just sign him up for everything
      • he plays every sport for at least half a year
        • they signed him up for hockey to like ??? see what would happen???
          • if you were in a foreign country and someone offered to let your kindergartner slide around on ice while wearing several pillows as crash pads, you would take that opportunity too. god.
            • they didn’t realize he would just like…….. decide to move into the rink, okay. that part wasn’t really part of the plan. they didn’t mean for him to live there.
      • he took ceramics classes for six years because that…. seemed like A Thing That Children Do. they own no less than thirty-seven bowls in various states of lumpiness. his dad won’t let anyone throw any of them out. “they’re all perfect!” he says, adamant. “oh my god, pá, really. this one literally wobbles when you put it on the table.”
    • whiskey’s youngest sister is the first one in the family to ever actually get grounded
      • by god, there is some yelling about sexism
      • “THE ONLY REASON ANDRÉS NEVER GOT GROUNDED IS BECAUSE HE’S A BOY” “we grounded andrés when he was eight, you don’t remember it; my friend amy at work suggested it. we didn’t know what it meant so he just laid on the ground for an hour and made mad faces at us.” 
        • “i’m gonna find her when she’s printing stuff and ask some more questions” - whiskey’s mom circa ten years ago

I have a new student.
He has short hair, beautiful eyelashes, and the most spunk and optimistic sass I’ve ever seen.
Today, my kids were confused.
This student, with an unfamiliar and girlish name, had cropped hair and a Ninja Turtles backpack along with his floral boots.
So we talked.
I asked each of them if they would prefer to be called ‘he’ or 'she.’ And when I got to this new student, he asked to be called 'he.’
One of the girls asks 'wait, isn’t A a girl?’
And I looked at her, then at A, and said “if A would like to be a boy, and would like to be called him, we need to respect that. A may be called whatever he wants.”
And you know what this girl did?
She smiled, first at A and then at me, and said
“Wow, I didn’t know that!”

and this is why I like to teach.

cardboardhydrates-liked said to it-refused:

What about something where Grillby and Sans run into someone Sans knew as a kid, a classmate or a teacher or something, and Grillby gets to hear stories about Sans when he’s little?

This doesn’t fit in the series, really, but that doesn’t really matter and it’s a good prompt so here’s a few hundred words of Sans being miserable.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

I'm not exactly sure who else to ask about this but since you've already answered a question about the tour I thought I might as well ask. I never thought Mark would come to my state but he's coming A HALF AN HOUR DRIVE FROM ME. I can also pay the entire thing out of pocket, but my family has never really understood my youtube interests and probably wouldn't want to go with me, and I have literally 12 hrs to decide. It's stressing me out since I might not ever get this chance again. Any advice?

OH WOW HALF AN HOUR! I’m excited for you already! I have to drive an hour and a half to get to the tour here :D

I can understand where you’re coming from. My parents don’t really get the YouTube thing either. Thankfully I have my sister Scribby to go with.

The part that stresses me out is I can’t bring stuffed animals of any kind to the show. Which means I can’t bring my comfort turtle Felix or the backpack I take everywhere with me. *wheeze*

But my advice to you:

Just do it.

I’m scared as hell to go around all those strangers without Felix, even if Scribby is going. However, I know I may not ever get this chance again. I know even as I’m ordering tickets, my brain is going to be yelling at me not to go. I’m going to refresh and close out of the page so much. 

But the prize of seeing Wade, one of the people I’ve always looked up to and admired, live in person. That’s too good an opportunity to pass up. (lol sorry mark i know who i’m there for)

Plus I promised her I’d go with her. I never break a promise, and I don’t plan to now.

Best of luck, anon friend! <3

-Cat

6

“You get hit with a transformation ray. Which animal do you turn into?”

Finally finished drawing Animal Voltron which was based off the ‘What Paladin are you?’ Official Quiz. It was a lot of fun drawing this. Besides Shiro, who I had too much fun with, all the others were kind of hard to imagine/difficult to draw.

If you want to see how I thought of these designs then keep reading ^w^ And why Pidge is a Turtle Dove not an actual turtle xD

Keep reading

Your morning scenario ❤️

You sighed deeply, inhaling the scent of the air flooding through your bedroom window. The sunlight cast through the panes and onto the bed, sparkling off your skin and that of the man you love who lay with his stomach against your back with his face buried in your hair.
Of course, as a mother, these quiet moments were few and far between.
As you were about to find out.

“Mommy, mommy, mommy! Daddy, daddy, daddy!” You heart the thumping of footsteps and the creak of the mattress and your daughter climbed up onto the bed, shaking both of you.

Your daughter Jaymie was only six, but she was more than enough to handle. With a head of long hair that was always tangled and that guilty looking smile, you could never quite tell if she was up to no good.

Jimin rolled over with a whine, then sat up.
He’d always been so grumpy in the morning, but since the birth of your daughter you’d seen a dramatic transformation.
“Good morning, princess,” he said softly, grabbing and pulling her into his arms with a smile to place a kiss on her forehead. She squealed and wriggled her way loose, holding up a splotchy picture with still wet paint.

“Do you like it, daddy?” She said, waving it in front of his face. “It’s me and mommy!” Jimin smiled at the figures scribed in thick paint, gently taking the picture out of her hands.
“It’s beautiful! Can daddy keep this?” After receiving a nod, he smiled, cuddling her tightly once more.
“Jaymie, baby,” you said softly, running a hand through your own hair. “Why don’t you go downstairs? Mommy and Daddy will be down in just a minute… We’ll make you breakfast.”
Your stubborn child shook her head at first, but the promise of food had her scrambling off the bed.

Jimin grabbed you and pulled you to him once more, placing a gently kiss on your lips as his hands caresses your cheeks.
“Good morning, beautiful,” he said with a grin, and you felt your face burning.
“I see what you did there. Ugh, I want more sleep… But still, our girl can’t be kept waiting.” He said, pressing a soft, slow kiss to your lips that made you reconsider making her wait. But he pulled back far too soon, smirking at the fact that he could still have this effect on you after all these years.

“C'mon, you,” he said affectionately, wrapping his arms wrapping around your waist and slowly helping you sit up. You grinned up at him through your messy hair that Jimin adored, before standing.

“Okay, okay, I’m all up for today.”

~

Breakfast was relatively easy in your household, as Jaymie never ate anything but toast and scrambled eggs for breakfast, which was perfect as you were an expert in both.

Jimin came down In his bright blue dressing gown, covering his warm chest that until a few moments ago had been pressed against your back. God, he was beautiful..

You set the plates down on the table, seeing both your daughter and husband’s faces light up with the smile that they both shared as she looked just like him. Ah, soon she’d be all grown up… Just the thought made you feel a little sad, so you pushed It out of your mind.
“Thank you, baby,” said Jimin, placing a hand on top of yours as you sat down.
“Thank you, mommy!” Shouted Jaymie, grabbing her fork and beginning to messily shovel food into her mouth.
You laughed, looking at Jimin’s face. It was filled with softness, adoration for the messy little girl sitting across from him.

Once all of you had finished your breakfasts, you sent a grin Jaymie’s way.
“Hey, y'know that new water park?”
She nodded eagerly, awaiting your next words.
Well, how about we go today?
She shrieked, stamping her feet on the floor.
“Yaaaaay!” She squealed, jumping up. “I’m gonna go pack!”

You and Jimin laughed, before he looked to you.
He stood up, pulling you up into his arms. He grinned cheekily, placing a swift kiss on your mouth.
“It’s been all these years,” he whispered, placing his hands on your hips. “And I still can’t believe the girl of my dreams is mine and has a child with me.”
He began to attack your mouth with kisses, over and over until you had both dissolved into laughter as you leant your foreheads together.
“I love you, (name).”
“I love you, Jimin.”
“Eeeew!” Said a voice from the doorway, and when you turned to look you saw your daughter with her ninja turtles backpack stuffed full.
“Kissing is gross!” She pulled her face, hiding her eyes.
You grinned cheekily, then leant in to give Jimin another kiss, laughing as you heard your daughter’s response.
She whined, and you both laughed as you pulled away.
“Gross…” She came over to the two of you and took your hands, smiling.
“But I suppose it’s okay, because Mommy and Daddy love each other very much, right?”
You looked up at Jimin, and sent a soft smile his way. He blushed, looking back to your daughter.
“Hey, shouldn’t you wait until Mommy and Daddy are dressed before we go?”
She pouted. “But I wanna go noooooow!”
You laughed. “Alright, alright, we’re coming.”
She grinned and dashed back upstairs, leaving you and Jimin alone.
“C'mon, pretty lady,” he whispered, wrapping his arms around your waist. “Time to go.”

Once you were dressed, you packed the car and set off. Jimin and Jaymie sat singing along to Jimin’s Big Bang album, and though you complained they were too loud, you couldn’t remove the smile from your face.
You silently thanked any God that existed for making sure you never had to face a dull day ever again, for as long as these two were around you’d always have fun.