turquoise eye shadow

signs as shit from the secret history
  • Aries: 'A week or two before the paper was due, he had started showing up in my room about two or three in the morning, looking as if he had just narrowly escaped some natural disaster, his tie askew and his eyes wild and rolling. “Hello, hello,” he would say, stepping in, running both hands through his disordered hair. “Hope I didn’t wake you, don’t mind if I cut on the lights, do you, ah, here we go, yes, yes.…” He would turn on the lights and then pace back and forth for a while without taking off his coat, hands clasped behind his back, shaking his head. Finally he would stop dead in his tracks and say, with a desperate look in his eye, “Metahemeralism. Tell me about it. Everything you know. I gotta know something about metahemeralism.”
  • “I’m sorry. I don’t know what that is.”
  • “I don’t either,” Bunny would say brokenly. “Got to do with art or pastoralism or something. That’s how I gotta tie together John Donne and Isaac Walton, see.” He would resume pacing.
  • “Bunny, I don’t think ‘metahemeralism’ is even a word.”'
  • Taurus: 'Late that night—two a.m.—my house chairperson pounded on my door and yelled that I had a phone call. Dazed with sleep, I put on my bathrobe and stumbled downstairs. It was Francis. “What do you want?” I said.
  • “Richard, I’m having a heart attack.” I looked with one eye at my house chairperson —Veronica, Valerie, I forget her name —who was standing by the phone with her arms folded over her chest, head to one side in an attitude of concern. I turned my back. “You’re all right,” I said into the receiver. “Go back to sleep.”
  • “Listen to me.” His voice was panicky. “I’m having a heart attack. I think I’m going to die.”
  • “No you’re not.”
  • “I have all the symptoms. Pain in the left arm. Tightness in chest. Difficulty breathing.”
  • “What do you want me to do?”
  • “I want you to come over here and drive me to the hospital.”
  • “Why don’t you call the ambulance?” I was so sleepy my eyes kept closing.
  • “Because I’m scared of the ambulance,” said Francis, but I couldn’t hear the rest because Veronica, whose ears had pricked up at the word ambulance, broke in excitedly.
  • “If you need a paramedic, the guys up at the security booth know CPR,” she said eagerly. “They’re on call from midnight to six. They also run a van service to the hospital. If you want me to I’ll—”
  • “I don’t need a paramedic,” I said. Francis was repeating my name frantically at the other end.
  • “Here I am,” I said.
  • “Richard?” His voice was weak and breathy. “Who are you talking to? What’s wrong?”
  • “Nothing. Now listen to me—”
  • “Who said something about paramedic?”
  • “Nobody. Now listen. Listen,” I said, as he tried to talk over me. “Calm down. Tell me what’s wrong.”
  • “I want you to come over. I feel really bad. I think my heart just stopped beating for a moment. I—”
  • “Are drugs involved?” said Veronica in a confidential tone.
  • “Look,” I said to her, “I wish you’d be quiet and let me hear what this person is trying to say.”
  • “Richard?” said Francis. “Will you just come get me?Please?”
  • There was a brief silence.
  • “All right,” I said, “give me a few minutes,” and I hung up the phone.'
  • Gemini: 'Access to the snail's interior was gained by a child-sized tunnel.[...] From this tunnel, I was extremely startled to see protruding a pair of adult male feet, shod in some oddly familiar brown-and-white spectator shoes. I caught and shook a bony kneecap. 'Charles.'
  • He began to flounder wildly, as if he had waked to find himself in ten feet of water. At length, and after repeated assurances that I was who I said I was, he fell on his back again, breathing hard.
  • 'Richard,' he said thickly. 'Thank God. I though you were some kind of creature from space.''
  • Cancer: '"Richard old Man
  • are you Frozen? it is quite warm here. We live in a Penscione (sp.) I ordered Conche by mistake yesterday in a restaurant it was awful but Henry ate it. Everybody here is a damn Catholic."'(Bunny's letter)
  • Leo: The barmaid- in her fifties, with turquoise eye shadow and lots of turquoise rings to match- looked us over, our suits and ties. She seemed startled by Charles's order of two double whiskeys and a club sandwich. [...] When his sandwich came he picked it apart, ate the bacon and left the rest, while I drank my drink and watched the Lakers.
  • Virgo: ''Now,' he said. 'A single cap, roughly this size, of A. phalloides is enough to make a healthy seventy-pound dog quite ill. [...]'
  • 'Henry, how do you know this?'
  • He was silent for a moment. Then he said, 'Do you know those two horrible boxer dogs who belong to the couple who live upstairs?'
  • It was dreadful but I had to laugh, I couldn't help it. 'No' I said. 'You didn't.'
  • 'I’m afraid I did,'he said dryly, mashing out his cigarette.'
  • Libra: ''The poison doesn't take effect for at least twelve hours,'he said. 'So even if I overdose I'll have a certain advantage, a grace period. With an antidote on hand for myself, just in case...'
  • 'An antidote?' I said, jarred, leaning back in my chair. 'Is there such a thing?'
  • 'Atropine. It's in deadly nightshade.'
  • 'Well, Jesus, Henry. If you don't finish yourself off with one you will with the other.''
  • Scorpio: 'We went through a brief spate of target practice, shooting at mason jars that were lined on a wicker tea-table we'd dragged into the yard. But that came to a quick end when Henry, who was very nearsighted, shot and killed a duck by mistake. He was quite shaken by it and we put the pistol away.'
  • Sagittarius: 'The guard turned quickly, and somehow his gaze landed not on Henry but on Francis, who was standing staring into space. "So it's you, is it?" he said with venom. "Mr Off-Campus who thinks he can park in the faculty parking lot."
  • Francis started, a wild look in his eye.
  • "Yes, you. You know how many unpaid violations you're carrying? Nine. I turned your registration in to the Dean just last week. They can put you on probation, hold your transcripts, what have you. Suspend your library priveledges. If it was up to me they'd put you in jail."
  • Francis gaped at him. Henry caught him by the sleeve and pulled him away. [...]
  • "Why the hell haven't you paid those parking tickets?" Henry whispered to him.
  • "Leave me alone."'
  • Capricorn: 'What I did experience when alone was a sort of general neurotic horror, a common attack of nerves and self-loathing magnified to the power of ten. Every cruel or fatuous thing I’d ever said came back to me with an amplified clarity, no matter how I talked to myself or jerked my head to shake the thoughts away; old insults and guilts and embarrassments stretching clear back to childhood—the crippled boy I’d made fun of, the Easter chick I’d squeezed to death—paraded before me one by one, in vivid and mordant splendor.'
  • Aquarius: '"Well, if you wake up intending to murder someone at two o'clock, you hardly think what you're going to feed the corpse for dinner."
  • "Asparagus is in season," said Francis helpfully.'
  • Pisces: 'Once, over dinner, Henry was quite startled to learn from me that men had walked on the moon. 'No,' he said, putting down his fork. 'Its true,' chorused the rest, who had somehow managed to pick this up along the way. "I don't believe it."
  • “I saw it,” said Bunny. “It was on television."
  • 'How did they get there? When did this happen?'