Burt Reynolds: Turd Ferguson: Yeah well, why don’t you give me, ah.. why don’tcha give me Ape Tit for $200.

Alex Trebek: It’s not “Ape Tit.” It’s A Petit.. [ shakes head ] ..never mind! Let’s just go to “Animal Sounds” for $600. This is the sound a doggy makes. [ Connery buzzes in ] Mr. Connery.

Methinks the transcript this little snippet came from is COMPLETELY wrong! He wasn’t Burt Reynolds…he was Turd Ferguson! 

After crossing Burt’s name out I feel MUCH better about this little piece of comedy gold!

Watch on ice-nine.tumblr.com

This is my favorite SNL skit. No doubt about it.

Melissa Button boots by Frye

just pulled the trigger on these in light brown. can I afford them? probably not, but all signs pointed towards BUY THEM NOW OR FOREVER REGRET:

  • I consulted my three go-to reasonable (enabling) shopping sources: Mom, sister & roommate
  • they’re $50 LESS than the regular Melissa Buttons
  • I put them on my Rewards Visa meaning these boots are technically buying me Starbuck’s gift cards
  • they’re gonna last for.ev.er.
  • free 2 day shipping!
  • I need flat boots for life, but also for Boston, which is SO SOON.
  • I’m a turd.

get your own pair over @ endless.com for $277.

(God Bless Endless.com, which also supplied me with my long-awaited Linea Pelle.)